All Comments on 'Enlightened Descent Ch. 04'

This one was a bit of a roller coaster for me. It started in a surprisingly funny "what the fuck did I do last night?". Then that drama at the office and the consequences as everything came tumbling down. I felt for her, so those parts were hard to read. And a nice strong ending. A thrilling, powerful and well written chapter overall.

A few story remarks though - the way people handled the news at the office, and how they behaved - it seemed unrealistically dramatic. Sure, she'd be fired, but I think even halfway competent management would have kept a tight lid on everything and so would the employees if they knew what's good for them. Rumors, sure, but in private, and in hushed tones. I think keeping the company professional, while revealing everyone knew, even without all that direct drama, would have still worked.

The second remark is about my growing dislike of Penny as a person. This isn't a criticism of the story as such, since it may have been intentional. It may even speak to the strong characterization. But in short, everything Penny does, and how she does it, sets off alarms for me. You may however turn it around yet, like you did with the cousin in Kissing Cousins, so I'm curious about that at least.

Hi,

i really liked the first chapters, Allison finding someone to take control, the playful mood. Then there was the tattoo, quite good, even exiting.

But all the things afterwards? Getting her fired, everything she achieved so far shattered in pieces, her appartment as good as gone?

From playful to TPE doesn't seem right in my mind...i would have stepped in front of a bus because my life got ruined by someone who promised me that those thing won't interfere with my job. A total loss of trust.

It's well written, in a really good style, but unfortunately i don't like the outcome...slavery should make a slave proud of being a slave, not scared like shit.

Well, what can I say. It seems people are enjoying this series. Jessica, as always your comments are appreciated. Anonymous, I’m not a labor attorney, just a writer of erotic fiction. The scene at the office was never meant to be an accurate portrayal or profile of labor relations, just a work of fiction. Body Hunter, who is to say that Allison will not, in the end, enjoy her place as Penelope’s slave. Give it a chance, the story is not over yet, Dreadlocks. Saphhia

Why'd you take it down?

I received a lot of negative feedback regarding this chapter, and decided that it would be best to remove it. I have not decided whether I am going to continue this story.

Saphhia

I'm interested in what happens with the characters here.

god damn haters always ruins everything...

i would like to read chapter 5 so bad, im sure i'd love it

btw you are doing this for free so you should do it how u like it

Though it's heavy stuff, I like this story. Notwithstanding Cunt's signature, I think it should still be in the non-consent section, but that's my opinion. Please keep on writing and posting.

I can't help thinking Allison being fired because of her private life is impossible in Spain. But it's narrated very, very intensely and adds lots of emotional charge to the story. I can't stop reading it!