All Comments on 'Enlightened Descent Ch. 05'

Not often we get literal slave stories here. You have me hooked Sapphia. Looking forward to the next chapter.

I'm glad that you chose to republish this chapter. I hope that you continue the story. I'm looking forward to learn what happens next! Great writing! Creative! Excellent fantasy! The twists and turns in your stories - skipping between light sensual caresses and dark impending futures - really is wonderful and entertaining. Thanks for sharing your fantasy tale with us despite the odd book-burning element that seems to plague this site upon occasion!

To Nerbus and Mythsman, thank you for your kind comments and support. I hope to continue this story, should the fates allow. Dreadlocks, I appreciate your concern over this (anonymous) individual. I do not understand why this person has it in for me, but they seem to, and I find that unfortunate. Whenever comments veer away from constructive criticism and become personal attacks, nothing good ever comes of it.

Saphhia

End of Chap 4, no contract signed just 2 gals having fun. One leading the other through her spiral to the very depths the bottom. Beginning of Chap 5 sold to another for cash...what?

Last four chapters in les/exhib/fetish - this one *BAM* NON-CON...

In the early chapters it was all cute and fun. The humiliation scenes were exciting and exactly what the slave needed. But more importantly was how well you aggressively established the bond, of a need to be slave, to an advantageous slave owner. This was very well played out and multiplied with each subsequent scene resulting in the slave being regimentally torn down piece by piece both mentally and physically over what I thought was a very short time.

But where I was expecting a few 1:1 chapters to establish final submission, complete the slaves ultimate break down, so the owner could properly rebuild it in their image...instead we jumped straight to selling the slave. Did a contract ever get signed? Was it even necessary? Did something else occur? How did the slave know it could possibly be sold?

So I honestly ask where are we? Have a few years passed? Has time enough for the “all mine” owning and caring period, the sharing with others but still caring period, the swapping yours for someone else’s while yours still has some value period, then finally the period wherein you disown your property in favor of something better...in this case cash.

I know it’s your tale but why did you gloss over all of that? I can’t belive there was no story to tell for those years. Next chapter a flashback maybe?

Or is it one of those where it actually is the next day and the slave is actually being sent away to get their life back on track. But because th slave is so off balance it can’t tell up from down right now. You did note that the tatoo is already gone and as noted it symbolizes removing all traces of the slaves old life. The slave is in a new and truly foreign place, new rules, new structure - all are things that were absent in the slaves old life even when with it’s owner. It’s being given as a gift which is better fate than others in NON-CON stories have received in the past. And with the piercings and bindings in just her first day it has learned it’s wants and desires don’t matter. But even so, other slaves show the slave that despite its concerns it is loved. The slave still receives warmth, affection, the release, and the sleep it needed. Also, it’s owner didn’t really say how much money if any she received for the sale. Nor for how long the transaction would last. There is still that reference to the void clause in the contract (if one exists). So maybe are we heading into a world of new and enlightening experiences wherein after completing the trials, the slave returns home actually better for the experience, understanding herself and her needs better, and finally able to take charge of it’s life and choices going forward - even if it means returning to it’s true owner.

This chapter just seemed like such a twist that I’m torn trying to anticipate the next actions and I’m making up stuff in my head. Something I didn’t do in the first 4 chapters when they ended. Anyway I’m looking forward to the next chapter. And a bit better perspective on the timeline of this story..also how old is the slave, I assume mid 20’s when we started (maybe)? Now? Thanks.

Thank you for a well thought out and interesting comment. You have brought to mind some of the very same questions I asked myself before writing this chapter. I cannot divulge too much without spoilers, but suffice to say that many of your concerns will be addressed in future chapters. You are spot in with intended age of mid-twenties. You may also find that Allison may not be in so dire a position as you might think. As I suggest to many of my readers, be patient, and see where things go.

Saphhia

Is it coming soon?

I just wanted to let you know that I have enjoyed all your stories. I hope that the negativity has not discouraged you! I totally understand that writing erotica has very few payoffs, so I can understand if your works have gone by the wayside within the bigger picture of real life. But I hope not!

Thanks for all the work you have put forth so far and allowed us to read!

<>--+-

syrynsmyth

The next chapter in the Enlightened Descent series is up for approval. Sorry for the long delay, but I have had two novels that have been in edit, and are just now finishing up. Hope you enjoy, its a little different.

Saphhia

Looking forward to it!

You have taken us readers on a very rollercoaster of emotions and besides my own feelings, the comments clearly show that. That in turn shows your mastery of the craft of writing. You have me hooked!

Not only surprised, but shocked by the turn of events! The exotic 'oddisey' remembers me a mix between INSEX and Richard comics. Great combo.