by Romintrovert
I like that they haven't done the nasty as yet. You have got a good build up here.
A second chapter is very necessary. A good point is that he is portly, not everybody is fit and very healthy, makes the story more real.
Your writing is horrible. Now, the dude is about to bang her while her man is away serving the country?
Enjoying the slow build up, would have liked a second page, but willing to wait.
@Anon "Service".... It's a story, idiot, not a documentary... in case you didn't realise, it's not actually real, Duh.