All Comments on 'Every Man's Fantasy Ch. 22'

Did not expect this kind of story whem you first started Erin. Great work.

This​ story doesn't need sex to carry it. Looking forward to seeing how the women defend their rights to their planet.

I would give you a 10 but can't. Even without sex it is still good. Thank you

I've been a fan of your work and this story to date, but with this chapter, that is changing. In all honesty this chapter tells me that you are tiring of this story and looking to end it sooner rather than later, but expeditiously.

That decision in hand, you are doing the minimum to continue the story to its end.

What evidence do I base this on? this chapter was largely written in more third-person narrative form than any of your previous, and better, chapters. In previous chapters, this was basically Ezra's _personal_ story with enough side-story and narrative to assist in telling that story, but here that POV is largely missing. Your introductory comments told us that you're working towards a conclusion, and this chapter's narrative was the result. I'm severely disappointed. You had built a wonderful story, and just at the point where it was truly going to get interesting with political intrigue and with the interests of all of Ezra's women - not to mention his daughters and extended family - balanced against the interests of the rest of the Anglosphere...this tack at ending the story seems like nothing more than a cop out - like you either are getting bored with it, or that the story is getting to big for you to handle as an author/writer anymore.

Well, sorry, but this fan simply has to let you know that he's really disappointed. You could have done so much better than this as an ending. Actually, where you are is the perfect launching point for a second effort at this story, a book 2 if you will, but not if you continue on your present "ending trajectory". Your story world and carefully built characters deserve better than this ignominious end that you seem to have planned.

IId love to read what happened after the courts judgement

I have a couple of big nits to pick with the later elements of the story.

1] Where is Star Fleet? In Ch. 1 it said a Company or Battalion of “Military Police” were stationed at the space port to help keep order. But, then nothing. Space ships can go anywhere, they are not tied down to the tethered routes. This means that piracy is possible. The Anglosphere would need a Star Fleet to control that.

. . Star Fleet might also control access to planets that need protection to stop law breaking. Just like controlling piracy.

2] I find it hard to accept that the law was written to allow the Settler Comp. to delay for 5 years between when their agent arrived at a colony and when it applied for a 50 year extension of their ownership of the planet and have time time the agent arrived be significant. This does not allow for the possibility that conditions have changed between when their agent arrived and when they filed their claim. Like maybe a huge gold mine was found. Or maybe a vastly improved hyperspace drive was invented in those 5 years.

. . Normally, it is when the claim is filed not when the company's agent arrived that sets the time frame for what is being argued. It is fine with me that the Comp. be allowed to bring the case because their agent was delayed in returning. But, the new conditions at the time of the case being filed should be taken into account. Those new conditions were just ignored here.

3] I think that either space travel is expensive or it isn't. So, if it is expensive based on the mass or weight of the cargo plus ship and fuel, then metal would be refined at the closest possible place not shipped as ore because the metal is “reactive”and therefore dangerous. Also, shipping animal furs around would be expensive and therefore only for the really rich, therefore not a large market, therefore not able to support the economy of a plant.

. . But, if space travel is not that expensive then, Samothea could afford to ship in the few domestic males it would need (every other year) to make cloning unnecessary. It could also afford to ship in many female and a few male wild mammals to improve the ecology. [But, this isn't really necessary, the wild ecology seemed to me to be doing fine as it was.]

. . As for the women, they can bring in males to be husbands who will pay their own way and maybe be required to bring money or animals with them. This would end the meed for cloning even if it required new men as husbands every generation. Rejuvenation treatments are not necessary. They would be nice, but the women can just let themselves die sooner to keep their planet for their children. Or, better yet, because there are just 120 human clones on the planet they might get some rich guy to pay for them.{Mr. Fanshaw?} Assuming that it is conditions at the time the court case is filed that will matter.

When will the final chapter come out I wonder. I do love this story and root for the women of Samothea.

Does this mean you have dropped it?

If so please let us [me know] so we can stop looking for the next chapter.

Ready for the next chapter!

Can you just let us know whether you're going to continue this story please

I concur.

Hi all,

Very sorry it's taking so long. There is more to come and I am working on it.

I just have no time to write at the moment. Apologies.Bear with me.

regards,

Erinaceous.

Thanks for the wonderful comments. Very kind of you. You're exactly right in everything you say, except for a couple of things. (I can't go into too many details because of spoilers.)

1 there is a Star Fleet. It consists of 30 medium-sized vessels all trying to catch pirates on the border of the Anglosphere region and the Russo-Sino region of the Outworld colonies. It's a bone of contention between Earth and the Outworld planets because the Outworlders benefit from the military protection but the Earthers largely pay for it; yet the Outworld colonies generally have a higher standard of living than Earth.

I wrongly said that there was a battalion of MPs on Capella Space Station. It's actually a squad (9-12 men) and they're often at half-strength. There are private security firms as well.

2 Yes, the law about the settler company claims is a bit of a mess. I blame the Anglospehere tradition of case-made common law, though it was really a Macguffin for the sake of a later twist. If I re-publish at some time, I'll clear it all up.

3 Hyperspace travel is frighteningly expensive (and risky). It uses huge amounts of fuel. However Danielle Goldrick's new technology (the Samothea Project hyperdrive motor) is ten times faster than the old technology and one-tenth as cheap - unless large masses are being transported. The more mass, the less advantage there is to the new hyperdrive motor.

I'm not sure where you got the idea that osmium is reactive. The point is that a thick layer of a heavy metal is needed for x-ray shielding and the osmium needs to be in an alloy (with other expensive and heavy metals) so that it can be plated, dusted or electrolytically coated onto any device that has electronic circuits. It's the weight more even than the material cost of the metal that makes transportation to Samothea relatively expensive.

The wild ecology seemed to be doing fine because an ecosystem does not actually need mammals. New Zealand managed fine with birds and reptiles, until man arrived. However, that's also the case for Samothea: human colonists want domestic mammals and the original design of the ecosystem included wild mammals. Samothea would have been populated with more varities of birds and reptiles if it had not originally been populated with so many mammals (most of which died out).

I won't reply to your perceptive comments about cloning, Steve, because there will be spoilers.

Thank you for saying you love the story. I love writing it. If only I could give up work and just write, then I'd have finished ages ago and be ontp my next book.

Thanks again for the comments.

Erinaceous.

Thank you so much for replying and letting us know you will continue this story. Even if I have to reread the previous chapters when the new ones come out, I will.

TK

Wouldn't the dependants of the original settlers be the rightful heirs.

G L O R I A, GLORIA, that's what I say Gloria.

Van Morrison the Rolling Stones, the Doors.Get some girl

You have completely dropped the ball in every way. The take off and flight of this story was fantastic it a real shame you can't stick the landing. This was supposed to be harem story with Ezra as the protagonist but he has barely been in these last few chapters. Also in a harem you don't let the girls get with other men but so far all the girls that you set up to be with Ezra and that he hasn't gotten with yet have booked up with others. Also wild child a prospector? That's stupid, don't you remember her desire to have a baby with Ezra and saying she wanted one as soon as she completed junior training? Just going to ignore that and move on? Also Gloria falling in love with Roger is also stupid.

The negative (and sometime nitpicking) comments do not keep this from being an intriguing story, even though some may have validity.

That some human mind could devise something so otherworldly, so imaginative in technology, so insightful and varying in relationships, and so extensive in scope would seem to me to be impossible -- except for the fact that it exists.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Paul in Oklahoma