All Comments on 'Falling Down'

Sorry, this may be a very good story, but who has the time to read it all in one go.

Perhaps broken into appropriate parts?

I found the story very interesting and enjoyable to read. Thank you for writing and sharing it with us.

Keep up the good work, I look forward to the next chapter and where your story takes all the characters. It works so well in so many ways and connects with me personally.

To those that are saying that it is too long, I disagree but that is just me and I just finished reading all three parts in a single session.

At first I too, thought it was a bit longish...but then I remembered that the other parts of this tale were submitted in the Novella section and realized this part was written in the same format. This story is so heartwarming the way you have developed the 2 protagonists...although I think Gabby is too much in his own head for a High Schooler, pobably just me though.

I can hardly wait to read the next part to see how this all gets resolved.

Try not to keep us waiting over long.....a 5 for you!

So, I have to admit that I am blown away by the response this story has gotten! I wanted to take a moment and thank everyone that bothered to read, and even further thank those who commented! I really appreciate the love and support!

As to story length, a fair criticism. I've done some research in the past and the common consensus is that there is about a 50/50 split on people either loving it all posted as one story, versus hating that. In the end, for me personally, I upload as a single document as it keeps me writing! If I stopped and uploaded chapter by chapter, I would take way more breaks from writing. This way, I have to bust my butt and get it done to get it out in front of people!

As to the change in the genre... oops...

I do normally post in the novels and novellas section as the length of the story does push it into that category. One positive on it is that it seems to be pushing the story in front of eyes that it would not have reached had I just stuck to one category!

I sincerely hope this story continues. I love the length of the parts of this story. The characters are so well developed. I would love to read a continuation of this wonderful story. These characters will be hard to let go of when the story ends and if this part is the final part......I will carry these characters with me for a long while. ❤❤❤

Read all three parts over the last four days. Simply amazing.

Just a note that there are a fair few typos and small handful of grammatical mistakes so maybe look at getting an editor if you don't already have one (I'm happy to help)... but none of that detracted to the amazing story and your writing.

Really looking forward to the next part. Do you have an ETA for it?

Oh and just to add... love the length. Make it longer if you need to! I was disappointed to see it was only 21 pages. I wanted 100!

Another compelling instalment, another gripping read and another 5* from me.

I never comment but, I just had to tell ya, this is a really fucking good story man. I haven't been invested in any story on this site like I have this one. Keep writing man.

Great stuff!! More please don't stop now , carry on the good stuff, this is so real!!

Gabby qualifies for Medicaid...he can get treated at almost no cost...

This is high quality writing. I am glad I found it, you should consider a career and let us know where to find it.

I really enjoyed this, and found it really thought provoking, and it stays with you for that reason. Like others, I really hope you will continue this. All the characters are poised on the edge of interesting and difficult changes, or really depressing lack of it. The length is a risk, but well-worth taking to keep the momentum of the story, and the writing is great. Absolutely worthy of publication, if there are imprints who would take it on; as the sex is integral to the character development, it would be difficult to remove or tone down.

I know it takes a long time to make a story this good, judging by your upload schedule and the length of each section. Even if it takes you a year for the next part (which hopefully it won't!) I'll still be eagerly waiting to read it!

As a person who went through similar upbringing I found the story to be very very good and hope for more!!!! Please keep going and thank you

You did a really good job of showing a flawed main character, whose flaws are caused by and compounded by his completely dysfunctional parents. That final scene where he puts it all together to decide what’s best for him, and screw the rest, was perfect. While much of the he rest seemed slow, it had to be. You needed that volume of words/events to build the story to where it needed to be. I really can’t say there’s anything you could have done better.

More...

Very redundant with no real depth. I liked the other story. This one was 60 pages of the same thing over and over. Highly dissatisfied. And even a horny teenager can't get it up that much. Way, way too much sex.

I would buy this

I want more, Would love to here how there life grows together & if they do get married. I was happy & sad, now I am really sad as as there is no more of this wonderful story to read!!!!!!!!

I have to damit, I really fell in love with Karly. What a great and funny character. I told my wife I would divorce her and go for a younger, fictous US-American girl. :-)

I hope this is not the end. We all'd like to hear more about Gabby and Karly, her parents, his gunsmithing career, Collage and so on...

Please!!!!

So, there is a lot of literature that tries to show how mental illness feels. Amost all of it fails to properly express it. You, my friend, too that challenge by the horns and destroyed it. Never, in all my years of reading, have I actually connected with a character with depression in the way I connected with Gabby. You did such an amazing job with the mental aspect of this story.

In reading this one I thought the timeline was off. Then I realized no you had indeed had the two previous stories in less than a month.

This is likely the most powerful story I've read of its kind.

I like things that aren't overly simple. I like stories that don't try to fix everything by the end. Life is a journey not a destination. You seem to get better with each level of the book. Characters grow and develop. They have setbacks.

Fantastic writing.

The Falling trilogy is without a doubt among the best this site has to offer, and I'm heartbroken to see that there isn't more of your talent here or on your website.

I'm almost convinced that maybe possibly this is an alias and you are actually a published author under an other name.

If that is not the case, please please please do not abandon this gift you have.

You are a real storyteller, somebody with a boundless amount of heart and compassion and your stories, your visions and ideas are something you should share so more people can benefit from them.

It's been two years and more since you have published anything here, and the thought that you have given up on writing altogether seems incomprehensible to me.

You have a real gift, please don't throw it away.

Thia could use 1 more story to close everything out any chance of that?

I agree, you need to continue the story, you certainly have me hooked.

Pretty please .....

Just ask one thing, cause im a sucker for a happy ending and I know it's coming.

Take it easy on Jackie, maybe she needs to be saved too, and im a sucker for lonely hearts.

Have read the 3 parts in 2 days. That's over the Christmas period and being busy as hell. This story is that good. Its 3am right now and I need to get up for work ins few hours. Just couldn't sleep without finishing this. Really hope theres a happy ending for the couple. Including the family. Joshua will hopefully see how his reaction was a bit wrong but partly understandable as hes worried for his daughter. Hope theres a conclusion to this story soon.

I love this series please write more. I would love to see him make up with his friends and her family. Thanks it was a great read.

What everybody said about the need for a final part resolving several situations. Most important: does Gabby solve his mental issues? Also, does Gabby go to college on a scholarship? Do Karly and Gabby reconcile with the Kays sr.? I was hoping for a Bildungsroman but I didn’t get it. Gabby is as screwed up at the end as when the story started.

Excellent as far as it went but there are far too many loose ends to call it a completed work. Apparently the author gave up three years ago which is regretful.

but a shitty thing to do to your readers. too many unanswered questions. i don't think specifics are necessary, but you left us with a vested interest in the characters you created and left them to die before their story was finished.

This is an awesome series. Hopefully when you get a chance, you'll give us another chapter or a conclusion on it.

Please Finish this great story. Its so engaging that we all want an ending that's right for these two characters

This story from start to finish gripped me tonthe core. I couldn't put it down for the life of me. Please continue this story. Make it a saga. You know how to captivate and make the story vivid in my mind. I need more.

Really sad that the author seems to have gone radio silent. His website is also down, so he may have quit writing all together. Life sometimes gets in the way. I had no problem with the length but he could have probably shortened some of the sex scenes just a bit to make it flow better. That being said its still a 5-star story as you can feel the emotion and the push and pull of the characters.

The saddest part is that it looks like we may never get a resolution to the series. It is written in such a way with such passion it would be almost impossible for someone to pick up the mantle. That being said the series has left such a mark on me that I have begun outlining what could happen next. If another year passes I will probably release my version of future books. I share a similar past as the main character(not as dark). My first loves family pretty much ended up adopting me but sadly in the end we grew apart and ended up marrying other people. I am still considered a member of the family and a part of me still yearns for my first love.

Really sad that the author seems to have gone radio silent. His website is also down, so he may have quit writing all together. Life sometimes gets in the way. I had no problem with the length but he could have probably shortened some of the sex scenes just a bit to make it flow better. That being said its still a 5-star story as you can feel the emotion and the push and pull of the characters.

The saddest part is that it looks like we may never get a resolution to the series. It is written in such a way with such passion it would be almost impossible for someone to pick up the mantle. That being said the series has left such a mark on me that I have begun outlining what could happen next. If another year passes I will probably release my version of future books. I share a similar past as the main character(not as dark). My first loves family pretty much ended up adopting me but sadly in the end we grew apart and ended up marrying other people. I am still considered a member of the family and a part of me still yearns for my first love.

No one on this site is worth 80k words