All Comments on 'Fantasy Night - Gloryhole'

This is a sad story about a married woman that finds her true profession is to be a cheap whore...1*

for the loser cuck a doodle do author for placing his shit story on the wrong CAT

* and that does not signify the lone star state.

Is that even in a fictional story with make believe characters, I just can't picture or imagine people this stupid. Especially the wife. I found myself laughing at her actions and responses. Sorry, but this was just too dumb to enjoy.

Sorry to say, this was a very poor effort. It reads like the work of a 14 years old that has been reading way to much bad porn.

Can't give it even one star as I don't hate it; it's just too poorly done. No moral judgments, nothing against glory holes. It's all about the writing.

Writing OK,but for the plot structure

A good story needs motivation in the seet-up. It starts with a husband-wife fantasy night. Good so far. Kim gets tempted by one of the replies to their 'fake' ad. OK. I can buy this, seems a logical progression. She takes it a step further. Fair enough, I could buy that as well. But by this point I was beginning to anticipate a husband-wife fantasy night twist, such as .. the husband set up the whole thing from the start because he knew it was her fantasy. considering the way the characters were described, I was expecting something like that. I liked the story up to this point. A good read.

A story consistent with the set-up.

Then what happens? Out of nowhere we get a Kim who has dropped the fantasy night idea with her husband and goes it for real with someone else (quite aside from the over the top performance in the bookstore). It doesn't fit with the story set-up. Too out of character with the Kim presented for the first half of the story.

If you want to make such a big character transformation, you need a longer story to describe the transformation from wife to whore. Or think of a better set-up of this hidden part of her character.

Writing needs some work. From my experiences, this is a totally believable story and I have experienced something pretty similar with a hot slutty girlfriend...but I'll save that for one of MY stories! Keep writing...work on keeping things in order and better use of grammar and the English language. Get an editor from Lit to help you out. Don't get too upset about the nay-sayers...stick with it.

Writing / editing needs some work but I loved the story overall.

This got me hot. I liked the rough and readiness of it - it wasn't photorealistic, it was just enough sketched lines to capture the moments.

Another epic nominated for worst story ever in LW. This was nasty, in the worst sense of the word.

Good story.

now that is a great fantasy

loved it loved it

I would greatly enjoy the opportunity to read Brad's fantasy and oteh future fantasies involving Ashley and otehr men.