All Comments on 'Finding a Full Circle'

A lot of mostly skillfully told Literotica stories have concluded on a sour note by opting for a polyamorous ending,in my judgement. This one, however, seems to work by laying in the foundation of the women's prior long-term interdependent relationship.

In addition the narrator had suffered a lot. He performed some selfless acts while personal & spiritual rehabbing. He seemed to merit a double scoop of feminine attention.

This author has a spooky gift of often anticipating my reactions as a reader & resolving them in a very satisfactory manner. Leaving unfaithful wife flat out for a new life was logical, but there was morbid curiosity as to her fate & motivations for her adultery.

Jidoka kept this question open as a point of tension & gently but firmly deflected Anne Marie's siren call to trust/ marry again. Whew!

I also appreciated the ancillary characters like the tuff cookie with hidden soft heart, father in law in tandem with the life mentor/ boss who the narrator collaborated with post-divorce. This story concluded on a hard-won but upbeat note that contrasted well with Jidoka's previous skilled but uber- bleak story.

Full marks for these and more small fine touches that comprise in sum an excellent, excellent tale & uplifting read.

Nice Fairy Tale! Life is so much easier when you're rich, and living well is always pretty good revenge. Sending congratulation letters to employers and spouses was just being honest and proper, and was the best payback of all.

Forcing the in laws to reconcile with the slut wife was contrived and stupid, but I still gave you five stars this time, just don't let it happen again.

It was an obvious fantasy, but fun. Some of the cliches we all seem to rely on were there, but that's why they're cliches. We all use them. Revenge is best when the wronged guy is successful and wealthy, finds a beautiful woman and has a family. Our boy did it all and then some in this story. It was fun.l

Good story. Well written. It is really a pleasure to welcome some quality story writing into the rough and tumble LW world & its crazed readers.

A very well written story, definitely worth five stars. The scene at the bar where he had his final meeting with his former wife was just about perfectly scripted. The evolving relationship with his ex's family was touching and I can easily picture the scenes between them as if I were there, because I grew up around those people. And then there are the relationships that last for a life time, Amy, Lydia and children, every mans fantasy I guess, great frosting on your favorite cake.

held the promise of some originality. The rest of it completely failed to deliver.

This was a well crafted work; very entertaining story...

some of the characters - especially Lydia and Amy - were so totally unreal that they detracted from the story. The 'hero,' too, was little more than a charicature of a real person (A selfless lawyer? Are you kidding me?) whose motives and thoughts were so pure they made Mother Teresa look like a terrorist by comparison.

For the good writing, 3*.

The only thing i did not like is that he treated his ex wifes parents as his own and was treated the same . To just move on did not sit well with me . Sorry .

I loved it! This, to me, was a wonderful story in just about every aspect. The plot was entertaining, the emotional content was well delivered, and the characters were richly drawn.

I will admit that the Amy and Lydia characters and that relationship were a bit far fetched, but somehow in this story, that angle just seemed to work. The character of this man, his innate goodness and the pain he had suffered, cried out for fantastic happiness at the end.

I will be wanting to read more of your work after reading this. Well done and five stars!

takes time and patience and just maybe there is a reward, TK U MLJ LV NV

Well written but the part about being without sex for ten years was difficult for me to digest. What kind of a normal healthy man behave in such a manner? Porn is not a substitute for sex if you have an option. He was rich, thus he had an option. Still well written overall. A talented writer no doubt.

Thanks!

HDK said all that I was thinking and I would underline the word Fantasy for anyone thinking of reading the tale. (I have read tons of fantasy, Tolkien, Jordan, Sanderson, etc. and love it)

...but a rather odd ending. Impeccable writing and a Finely crafted story. A seemingly normal guy with a normal life, and yet he finds himself being married to a cuckoldress who has a black bull, and then winds up in a poly amorous relationship. Truly weird, but thoroughly enjoyable.

I enjoyed the story overall quite a bit: very readable.

The first half of the story was effective, and the main character took an interesting approach to dealing with the infidelity.

I thought the story jumped the shark a bit with a few of the elements, though. Specifically, the 10 years of celebacy, the nature and extent of the ex-wife's betrayal (so over the top for the good Catholic girl from a solid family with a husband she truly 'loves' to do the cut-off and intentional pregnancy thing-absurd, really), etc.

I didn't mind the bizzare 3-some angle, though it was perhaps a little off topic.

I did enjoy it, though, and gave it high marks.

Really enjoyed the story. I especially liked his rational showdown, and his rationale for releasing Sweetie to pursue her happiness. After reading LSDs analysis, then those of several others, most everything I would say about this story (except for the sentence above) would be redundant! Great work!

5*

A well written and a very interesting tale.

Thanks for the read

Don't listen to him.

Very Well Done. Held my attention. Loved the talk with the slut wife. A little fast getting into a law school but your world your rules. stayed the good son. got slut back with parents - very good of him. ten years without outside sex, happens. two women was great - different personalities good idea. dont think he would abandone the family but what the hell. 5

There were two stories here: the one of a man struggling to regain his life after a very painful betrayal and another story of a man entering into a polyamorous relationship that is required for mutual happiness.

For the most part, these stories are deftly interwoven. There is some confusion near the end where I was lost what events happened when, but that confusion was easily outweighed by the strength of the overall storytelling.

I’m not sure how others read these stories on Lit, but for me, I need to indentify, to emphasize with at least one character in any piece. Most authors want that person to be the main character. Sometimes I find no one redeeming. That’s not the case here.

I really liked your main character…a lot! To put it another way, Gavin O’Conner is a ‘mensch’, one of the rarest of rare characters in an LW story. The manner in which his ex-wife’s lover is marginalized reminded me that the story was about Gavin O’Conner and not about his wife’s betrayal or his failed marriage.

Gavin displays magnanimity when dealing with his ex’s relationship to her own family. Again, this is a rare quality in a Lit story and here his negotiated reconciliation made perfect sense.

You managed to tell his story with a tone that always painted his environment as hopeful, even when he as in the deepest of his depression and pain, he was still hopeful and the tone of the story stayed upbeat.

When you drew me into the second story I was reminded of another off-beat arrangement in another favorite story of mine on another site entitled “A Life Uncommon”. Here, like there, you made the relationships believable without being caricatures. The result was refreshing and as a reader I thank you.

A succesful man and alone for long time, interesting. Your earlier story was funny with a succesful man, who was alone. Here the benefit is 2 women for the long time loneliness. I prefer quicklier healing up from a cheating wife. BTW 5*****

Thanks for sharing.

I only comment as "Anonymous", but I only comment on those stories I truly appreciate or completely loathe.

I won't quibble about the few errors in grammar, spelling or such, because you took the time to make the characters real, the story compelling and the outcome novel.

This was a respectful work. It seems you may have some experience along these lines.....and have remained true to your character as well as to your characters.

Well done. Thank you!

5 Stars!

but when it tripped over into pure fantasy I'm afraid it just didn't work for me.

This world that these folks co-created would work just fine for me. Somehow blending old fashioned values and a polyamorous lifestyle worked here, and gives me hope that as a society we can continue to expand beyond the puritanical box we have been basing right and wrong from.

DP

Started good, ended real bad.

I wanted to write a longer opinion about this story. The Revenge Stories are 3 main archeotypes: 1. The Cruel Revenge (to do something to injure phisicaly or health state (contagious illness) of the cheaters, usage of something electric shocking instrument , to use cold sprinkle water (BigK10's story "...And Stay There!"), to hide cloth to let the cheaters nude walking in the streets, to do murder, to use medicine/poisson etc..) is the first archeo type. Some Cruel Revenges are very humorous, but others are very tragic.

2. The second archeo type I call Moder Figaro Type Revenge. It may be called Smart Husband Revenge (Papatoad's "Telephone Blitz", BeerMaker's "Dawn: A Cheating Slut Wife" ), but this name is not good, because in some stories the friend(s) of the husband is/are the Spiritus Rector = Modern Figaro of the Revenge (FtancisMacomber's "The Six O'clock News Slot" or itmgr2010's "Black & Tan Blues Ch. 04",).

3. The third archeotype of the Revenge is the Romantic Revenge. The live better without the other this IS NOT REVENGE. The Romantic Revenge that when the cheater/ex meets (or news exchange happens through aquintances, common children, media, unknown persons, et...) the more succesful spouse/exspouse and the cheater or the ex cheater discovers with sad or annoying disappointment the betrayed or the betrayed ex is in MUCH better state without the cheater AND THE MOST IMPORTAN MORE HAPPY!!!!!!!!!. The excheater (cheater) feels like the sky fells on her(his) head. The Romantic Revenge works better to the woman brain, because the male and the female brain work in other methods. THE BEST Romantic Revenge (I call this story a Romantic Revenge Hurricane, Typhoon, Gale, Storm, Earthquake, Supervulcano, Tornado) Story is Vulcez's "How Are You?". Howvever I give some other examples: StangStar's "Love is for Suckers", toesman's "Loretta: Redux",Seurat's " Homecoming Call", cpete's "Family Guy".

4. Many good Revenge Authors mix the 2 or all 3 Revenge Archeotypes to get higher level Revenge. The examples: Azpiri's "Shattered" , where the husband does a fantastic super Modern Figaro Type Revenge and accidentaly they meet and the exwife burns IN VIVO in the fantastic Romantic Revenge Situation at the end of the story, likegoodwine's "No String Attached", where the exhusband tricks the exwife to lose her lover and he got a younger Second Chance woman.....or similar FrancisMacomber's "Honey Trap".

5. This story is a Consequence Story only, because the GREAT SCEN, when the exwife and the main hero meet and the exwife wants an Reconcilation, the refuse arrives from a wealthy but LONELY EXHUSBAND!!!!!!!!! He have lived alone for almost 10 years (but in wealthy state), SO THE EXWIFE's UNHAPPINESS IS NOT EMPHASISED IN THE STORY!!!! The money is important for the happiness but alone the money does not makes anybody HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! An Unhappy exhusband denys for reconcilation IS NOT ROMANTIC REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

6. This Author's earlier story "An Average Descent" was at the border of the Consequence and the Revenge story, but the whole story is in the Consequence Story Group !!!!!!!!!!!!

This story is an interesting Consequence Story only. I like the Consequence stories as well, but an average Revenge Story is much better than a good Consequence story is. BTTap has a much better Consequence Story "Friend Request Accepted", where an Super Epiloge in which the exhusband becomes much happier and more succesfull than the cheating exwife is and news exchange or accidentaly (VERY VERY IMPORTANT ACCIDENTALY) encounter gives information to the exwife about this it would have changed that story a good Revenge Story.

To write an average Revenge Story is more difficult as an average Consequence Story, because in the real/true life the Consequence is the majority case!!!!!!!!!! However acts of Comte de Monte Christo is the more interesting for us the readers!!!

@ OldHideki I am sorry for you!!!!! I forgot to mention as an good example one of the best Modern Figaro Revenge and Romantic Revenge mix story OldHideki's story "How Does it Feel to be a Cuckold? " I am sorry again!!!!!!!

Well, two at bats and two homeruns. Thank you for the entertainment. Hope to read many more of your stories. Thanks again.

tom anon

P.S. Re the poly angle--are you really Scorpio with a new handle?

P.P.S If you need help with Lydia let me know.

I disagree with the commenter who stated that because Gavin was alone he was not happy or living well. As described in the story he was incapable of having a good relationship early on due to the pain and later he did not need romance because he was not driven by sexual needs. What Anne Marie did to him was pure evil. She had an affair with her boss and purposely gotten pregnant by her boss. This was not just a mistake like getting drunk and having an one night stand. Anne Marie withheld making love to Galvin as requested by her lover and stopped taking birth control pills during period. So as the actor says to the director "what was my motivation"? Obviously she was trying to trading up to her boss while holding on to Galvin as a safety net. Having a man's child is the classic way women have used to snare a man into marriage. Anne Marie wanted Galvin around just in case it did not work out with her lover/boss. Anne Marie was still lying 10 years later because she never made any attempt to ask for his forgiveness or seek him out for this "second chance." Galvin's revenge was so perfect because he moved on with his life letting God handle her fate. You have to ask what could Anne Marie do earn his forgiveness and the answer is nothing.

going, your on the right track.....bill

...pathetic excuse of a man. Really wimpy as Amy wanted. So being at the same time a dominant no mores A type is totally unrealistic.

I cannot believe that with the quality & polish these two stories have that you do not have some others hidden away. Even if you don't think they are good enough, these two submissions say they must be. Let's be having them..........

the guy is weak and pothetic at first

with no sex no women -

and then suddenly dominant man in control with two hot chicks running after him

- stupid story - 1 starr

One of the worst. "1*" !!!!

Two Blind Mice. See how they run off at the mouth....

Understand How someone can read a story, and then belittle the writer with such hurtfull

comments.I think this is how, those anons get their rocks off!.

ED

Not the standard by any means - not even a standard poly story so well done -

People have different attitudes and are entitled to their opinions - some of us think that some opinions are best kept to oneself to avoid the impression that the holder of that particular sentiment is simply st00pid or intolerant or well an asshat???

But feel free to share your words and hide your names that way we will never have the chance to look you in the eye and let you know how dumb you look -

Well written story with a fun outcome so i like it - a lot

And, it hit on emotions I didn't remember having. Hated the abandoning of the in-laws, but it worked well. 5 from me, even though a decade of single life celibacy seems beyond belief.

This was a great story; well written. It requires re-scoring to a 5.

The suspense and mysteries along the way added to the telling.

"...and then he shut down the computer, glanced around the empty dark room, once again the years of emptyness and betrayal weighing heavy in his heart. But at least his perfect fantasy would help him to overcome the lonliness and aid his masturbatory efforts for the next little while."

I did find this tale well written, but SO TOTALLY unbelievable that in a way it hindered my enjoyment. I WILL read your 2 other stories, as this submission was adequate enough to peak my interest. I know that an author can put out whatever fantasy is his hearts desire, and I in no way critisize you for doing that. But the disconnect from reality in this story was so obvious, there were many times I found myself thinking "bullshit" or "no way". The "nice guy alphamale" fantasy of two pretty coeds??? Our hero himself was too much a product of fiction: Nobody could pull this kind of shit off. Sometimes it is easier to suspend disbelief over one or a few minor plot points, but you really asked alot of your readers this time, and that is the main reason for my scoreing a 3. On the plus side, I liked your writing ability, I sense your talent, and your pacing is good. I felt the suspense you built with the "full circle" title device, as I wondered how long before he goes back to get together with the ex. I even liked the dialogue as he shot her down, making his points clearly and effectively. It WAS believable that this guy was a lawyer, and would talk that way. It WAS believable that he had enough time to think about what he would tell her and how he felt. But again, it was balanced so poorly against the UNbelievable relationship with her parents. So, yes. Not all bad, not all good. A fair "3", and I"ll let you know more after I read your other two. Thanks.

All through this I felt like I was taking three steps forward and then two steps back, and with each character along the way. The jerky progression interfered with the telling.

I loved everything about this story but him divorcing himself from the Santos'. I'm sure they would have loved meeting his loves and his children. I come back to this story often and it always brings emotions. Thank you.

You should know that you've become one of my favorite authors. I have willingly scored each story as a five. I hope you keep up the work and gift your admirers with new stories often.

.......but I honestly think tying up a few loose ends would have made a good story even better. Having said that, it is still an excellent read for most, except for the BTB crowd who will be sorely disappointed. More of a romance than LW tale.

Thank you for sharing your story with us.

I love all your stories! It's sad that Anne Marie had the affair! Just lke your "in her eyes" both women thought their marriage was too good and that is said!

Not only did he lose his soulmate but in the end lost his mother and father again!

I would like to see an epilogue to this story where he does get to see the Santos once again to show his new family off (both Amy and Lydia) and maybe see that Anne Marie has moved on with love also!

It gave no insight into the wife. Just her cheating and then his unrealistically perfect life. No explanation of why she cheated, why she chose to get pregnant.

Beautiful story. I really loved it, which I don't normally get to say. I was afraid at the start that it was one of those stories where one cheats and devastates the other, only for them to get back together at the end. HATE those. I was pleasantly delighted when this story didn't go that way.However, I agree with some of the other comments. It would have been nice to get some insight into why the wife cheated and why she wanted someone else's child. Also agree that it would have been nice if he stayed in touch with his loving 'parents'. Lovely story where everyone ended with dignity. I admit I usually love revenge stories and say 'burn the bitch', but this story would have been diminished by that. Loved it!

I know that it is fantasy, but that is why I read. I would love to see more along this vein.

One star drivel.

Next to the classic Sophia that is :)

Certainly five stars; big ones at that. The unfaithful wife's story was a little murky. I could see her confusion as it might have related to her partner in infidelity; what no outside romantic interests ever, the new face could be a powerful temptation. Our heroes almost complete lack of interest in her difficulties was a little cold blooded though he redeemed himself near the end with the forced rapprochement. Ten years of celibacy was unusual; customarily as with a death grieving last about a year. I liked it that he was able to absorb both young women without serious tension; he had that kind of personality. Without being a sadist I would like to have heard a little more about the adulterers misfortune. I don't mean a stoning, but a little more loneliness would have sweetened the cup. All in all you compose your own genre of LW stories; they all seem to have a flavor of their own-quite enjoyable.

not fully fleshing out the possibilities and the love between the three. And like someone said, the best revenge is living well and we readers wanted to know how his ex wife fared and her reaction to Gavin's two lovers. Nevertheless a five star.

Ten years without a woman is 90% of OBC's entire life - wouldn't be so bad except being a eunuch ensures that ten years will become 60, poor schmuck, or should I say poor cuck?

Not giving this story a 5 would be a sacrilege.

Living well is indeed the best revenge. Interesting twist with the two girls.

This was almost (but not quite) a perfect story for me!

I liked the main character. He was trying so hard to be a nice guy...but I was fist pumping when he sent the birth announcements out. He realized it was a moral failing of his, but that made him human.

I am notorious about skipping sex scenes. I know...go to a porn site and flip through the sex. I read LW because of the raw emotional input and pain in the characters. Sappy romance doesn't always do it for me. Give me an ohio, a Rhenquist...and it seems a Jidoka!

So when I say I was engrossed in the sex scene, that means something. It had a touch of kink (the submissive) but unlike most stories, there was a REASON she was this way...she had character traits which complimented it (her silence and her fear. It is a scary thing to give someone ANYONE that much control over you...so I totally gronked on Lydia!)

He didn't bounce back like a JPB hero, banging some girl one page later. This had character development. It had backstory. You took the time to make things seem...if not realistic, at least plausible enough to not set off my BS meter. I don't like poly stories...but this one, as said, was plausible.

Two quibbles:

One, I need to get my teeth drilled. It seems the sappy SAPPY sweetness of his relationship with the Santos (Saints...foreshadow much) gave me a bunch of cavities. It was quite a bit. MOST men trigger when they are reminded of 'that bitch'.

AND...as a little added psychological quirk, it took his LEAVING the Santos as a family unit for him to move on with the girls. Was this deliberate? Was is just coincidence? Since I think it was brilliant, OF COURSE you will say it was deliberate.

Two: this is the second (maybe third) story I have read of yours where you do that flashback thing. I hate to burst your bubble bubbala, but you don't do it as well as you think you do. Sometimes it can be a bit choppy...and if I am trying to put the story elements in order in my head, I've actually LEFT the story to MANIPULATE the story...which isn't where you want the reader.

Well done.

Good story with a happy ending. The breakup with his first wife was more realistic than most on this site.

story - 5 stars. If he didn't date, why did he have a favorite nightclub?

This story was great though and I loved how the life of your protagonist came to full circle. It's too bad, that you glossed over a lot of the Amy/Lydia/Gavin story, some 'under the sheets' action would've made this a really hot tale for me.

Such a powerful, odd, and yet perfect little story.

This story, on many levels, really does leave the rest of the other "Loving Wives" stories in the dust, in terms of impacts of infidelity on the loved ones.

Because I usually hate stories where both cheated and cheater spend endless hours having pseudo intellectual and pseudo analytical and linguistic chess matches over why, how, when, where... how big his dick is, compared to mine or how big/small her vagina is, compared to mine, or how rich he or she is, that you'd treat me so horribly, etc., etc., ad nauseam.... THIS IS THE STORY FOR ME: it's only a few sentences, representing a few minutes, and that's that!

But the most poignant aspect to this story ---- in terms of its tragedy ---- is not on our hero, who, as he said, was able to (after 10 plus years) moved on WITHOUT BITTERNESS to have an incredibly loved and fulfilling life, with a good woman and her best friend and cousin (the two who formed a pact to the bitter end, if necessary).

It is that Anne Marie Santo brought the sky crashing down on herself and, more importantly, on her large family: they all turned their backs on her, for fuckin' real, preferring to love Gavin as a son, with such a twist on its own in terms of his relationship with them, AFTER KNOWING how they've severed more or less all contacts with their own cheating daughter.

The other tragedy, of course, was Anne Marie Santo's own true regret: of course, as Gavin said, her regret was much more simply as a contingency of her CURRENT sad life, NOT that she had truly loved him and had merely made a "bad mistake" as she put it, when she started fucking that guy at work and having his kid... but those realities don't subtract from the fact that she truly had been cast aside by virtually everyone of her family members, because they all knew how much Gavin had loved her growing up together and how he worshiped her when they married and YET she chose to do that to him... and TO HER FAMILY MEMBERS, those heinous actions of hers, against Gavin, WERE ACTIONS AGAINST THEM; and they retaliated against her VERY SERERELY, so severe, so disproportionately harsh, Gavin himself recoiled from them, promising them (the family, which he loved like his own) that until they reconcile with Anne Marie and her daughter, from her fuck buddy, that he'd have nothing again to do with them.

And, guess what?, NEITHER side budged.

This is truly one very poignant story about how horrible, bad, sneaky, and heinous decisions ---- in violation of family sense of love, trust, loyalty, and common bonds ---- sometimes render you sad, isolated, severed, and cast aside as a stranger forever... from all those you claim to love and all those who claim to love you....

Anne Mari Santos, therefore, is truly one of the most tragic victims, in all of these LW stories. She truly lost everything and everyone meaningful to her.... her fuck buddy (who was really just fucking some fresh pussy, when it's available), her large and extended family, Gavin, her job... and now she's having to take care of a daughter, possibly more children, alone, working as a cashier, fucking around with different men to forget a life she KNEW she could have had, had she been a good, honest, and loving person and wife...

I was Never a pussy very aggressive and it cost me a great deal of time, money and health issues. Although I have been extremely successful it came about by being a calculating Gentleman as this story shows. My alter ego 19 year old mind has cost me a ton of grief, and a lot of money. But as the old Nashville song says "I am a winner". My wife and kids asked me not to be such a winner and enjoy life a little more. have fewer heart attacks and go slower. Not everythings needs to be a life or death battle. I am a very slow learner

Beautiful story,thank you.

Nice guys don't always finish last. Thanks for a very upbeat, and nicely twisted story. A fantasy should be reality? I can only hope

I don't typically read stories in this category (weird, right?), but usually when I try I'm bogged down by the annoying or the ridiculous. Not here. I was engaged immediately, and very invested in what would happen to Gavin.

The story started off incredibly sad. The loss of his two sets of parents, in different ways, tore me up. The careless way his wife treated him made me angry. Imagining him driving off to Las Vegas and laying low really upset me. Really. If I could've inserted myself into the story and given Gavin a hug, I would have. That you managed to bring the story to such a satisfying, happy ending speaks volumes about your talent and potential. I also really enjoyed your style.

As I'm a girl, I can't speak as an authority on how a brokenhearted man will behave. I WAS a little frustrated by Gavin's initial selflessness, but people react in so many different ways to loss and heartbreak. I get it. Kind of. Maybe I wanted him to be a bit more pissed off, but his restraint and awareness of the situation certainly made him admirable. I do think some of the stories on the site are silly, making the husband into a caricature--a frothing superman. That simply isn't realistic. The change was refreshing.

I could go on and on about how much I enjoyed this, but I'll let my 5 stars speak for themselves.

PS as an Irish gal I loved the names of a few of the kids and the Celtic knot ankle bracelet.

This is polygamy of course--thank you, captain obvious (!)--and it very rarely works. People are not so open minded in most cases, and there is a rough road ahead of any family that goes this route, as a consequence of that.

Real life does not just go like it is presented in this story. Eventually, things change, and one thing I know for sure; there can only be one queen bee in each hive. Eventually the one will eliminate the other, given the chance.

Too simplistic, therefore not believable, or interesting, for that matter.

he should have taken anne marie back

I really enjoy your work but this one didn't live up to the previous stories standards. The way he just gave up on his first marriage, divorced her and slunk away didn't sit right. Then to end up in this threesome was unrealistic and didn't seem to fit in with the personality that you gave him. Maybe next time.

Gavin did everything right for a truly loving and forgiving man. In the end he got what he deserved as well.

Of course he had his revenge moment. He wouldn't have been human without it. He didn't go overboard and once he'd taken his shot he let it go without looking back.

Somewhat wide-ranging in topics but it worked. I enjoyed reading the dialogue. It's a personal quirk of mine to put excessive(?) evaluation of a story based on how realistic/within character the dialogue is. Few writers can write believable dialogue. Even fewer can write good, believable dialogue. Jidoka is one of the latter.

After all that he had been through with the ex-inlaws, why dump them?

His relationship with them was about a deep abiding friendship, not directly about the inlaw thing. His love life might be moving on, so they can't be friends any more? I find that really, really weird.

He finds love with two cousins who have a profound connection with each other. Why would he fuck that up by marrying one of them. After his experience, why would he consider repeating the great marriage hoax? Why not just live with both of them? They love each other, just make the family that suits them. They should focus on the quality of the relationship, not the piece of paper. All paper is compost waiting to happen.

Enjoyed the story until the quasi-hollywood ending. Deserved better.

The dutiful wife by day and the slut by night. Ha!

There was quite a bit of difference in Gavin's treatment of Ann Marie in their three phases; wife,encounter with ex, and family reconciliation. It's a little difficult to reconcile.

All in all, an enjoyable read. Less morose finally than the previous three stories.

Well it seems everyone else gave their 2 cents worth so I should do the same.

I loved it, It was original, and that's already a hard nut to crack. The three way love of a man with 2 women, and not being immoral about it was a very tactful thread you sowed beautifully. Well done.

I said it before, you need to do more, the world doesn't really have enough good writers. Lots of bad ones but not too many good ones.

I could probably pick something I didn't like but it wouldn't be anything of any real importance so I'm not going to even bother to try.

5 Stars

I agree with @Domeric...This story wasn't bad for ending where you reward the cuckold with two women, like all good will be reward. The bad was for him not to take any action against the cheater, the lover and the bastard...He would let them rot in hell...

The good guy got the really big reward.

The cheater got stuck being a single parent without the support of her family for years.

He didn't need any more revenge than that. His congratulations gifts did their job.

At the bottom of the first page:

"I felt like a bit of coward when I had the flowers, balloons and gift basket sent to the James' residence, wishing Mr. James and Ann Marie congratulations on the birth of their child. I had a duplicate set of congratulations sent to Ann Marie, at her office, care of the company president. I had promised myself that I would not lower myself and intentionally try to hurt anyone, even Michael James, but the pain was still too raw. I needed to do something. I hadn't started any vicious rumors, just relayed a message of congratulations."

Congratulating the cheating husband and his wife for the birth of the bastard child.

Congratulating the cheating wife and cheating husband at work (care of the company president) for the birth of the bastard fathered by her supervisor.

Subtle, but not nothing.

Loved the story but felt like it was a couple paragraphs to short somewhere and it honestly irritates me that i couldn't tell you where they should go. An A- as opposed to an A+

I found three plot points disturbing:

1. Gavin could have encouraged the Santos family to welcome Ann Marie back without beating them up with a metaphorical baseball bat at a family event. That was crude and unnecessary.

2. There seemed to be no reason for him to end his association with the Santos family. Also gratuitous and unnecessary.

3. Amy, Gavin & Lydia loved each other. Many realtionships are ruined by marriage. There was no reason not to continue as a three adult family with children. Driving in the marriage wedge was also unnecessary. The sooner we get curch and state out of our bedrooms the better!!!

Doesn't mean you want to face the prospect of having her in your life. If he had maintained his relationship with the Santos family after reconciling them with his ex, it would have meant a lifetime of repeated encounters with her.

We don't see him paying Ann Marie's lover back for what he did to them. Nor did he seek any kind of retribution against any of the people that had wronged him. Ann Marie was just a typical cunt (not that all women are, just the ones who pull this kind of crap) and really did not deserve absolution. He should have left well enough alone. Losing the santos family was not necessary. He could have had the parents and siblings visit him without the cunt and her bastard.

Whatever, not my tale to tell. Was an above average tale in itself.

As another story on lit here says sometimes happiness is the best revenge. Yeah he could've been bitter and tried to destroy his ex and her lover. But that could've destroyed himself. When you first seek revenge dig two gaves.

Well written, except the ending was a little hard to swallow. When you were talking about Gavin's, Amy's and Lydia's character traits I liked the way you said that all their strengths meshed together well rather than their weaknesses. When it comes to parenting couples having the opposite strengths is better than couples having the same strengths. As long as both parents are involved with raising their children which happens a lot more today than it did back in the fifties where the father went to work and the mother stayed home to raise the children. Good entertainment, Thank you.

Ann Marie and her bull should have been dealt with more emphatically. The consequences of Ann Marie's treachery are insufficient to provide the needed deterrent to other women who may benefit from knowing what can happen to cheating whores. And the bull will carry on to ruin other women, other lives, because he got away doing it with Ann Marie. Gavin owed their punishment and pain to the world, but he did not fulfill that responsibility. In his forgiveness he facilitates their continued whoring and predation on other families. Too bad.

and to try and make annony mad and pissse3d off

Congrats. What a great story. It was beautiful, unusual and powerful. Five out of five. I liked the non-traditional way the protagonist dealt with his wife's cheating, True love should be exactly what he did. While some may disagree, this was a BTB story in a way because the best revenge is living well. Filling your heart with poison against your ex only poison's yourself. I especially liked how he acted and talked when he met with his ex later and how he reconciled her with her family without bending or compromising. She knew she lost a wonderful man and it was her fault. I liked how he called out her lies when she tried to get him back. And then the story threw me for a complete loop when Amy and Lydia arrived, but it totally worked. His good karma led them to him and him to them. The author tends to over use the phrase "unshed tears" a bit too much, but that is a minor complaint. The story even has a happy ending which is not usual for Jidoka. I had to go back and check the date and this is the author's oldest story. Cheers, Steve

With this story you prove that an erotic story can be first class, without being full of sex.

Thank you.

It just goes to show that it's the story and not the sex that makes your writing compelling. I enjoyed it very much. Thank you.

I don't know what it is but your story just didn't read right. Maybe it's me but it read more like a business report then a love and lost and loved again story. I guess I'll just have to read it again.

always quality writing. Five stars.

see most people tend to confuse "karma" as good or bad "karma" is the deeds of your life or the sum of your life, its effects on others may be either good or bad, but in itself it can be neither... eg saying nuclear fission is evil... what is really evil is using two nuclear bombs on innocent civilians in hiroshima & nagasaki. whats good is using nuclear energy to produce clean electricity.... both are result of nuclear fission, but in itself its can be neither good or bad, alas its effects could be one or the other....just similarly is the concept of "karma"..... sorry if i seem to be bit of blow hard, but i feel i needed to get my point across atleat once,

what are you jidoka? your stories are few yet you write so fluidly? as if your repertoire has over 200.. just like some of the more prominent authors here.... whatever you are jidoka i hope your stories keep showing the the diverse aspects of the human condition

I love erotica, but I love this story. I love the characters, I love their journey and I love the fact that you made me cry and filled my heart with joy.

Whoever you are, please continue to write, you have the ability to bring peace and joy into this world. This world really needs that badly.

I'm limited to a 5, and some of you have noticed over the years I comment occasionally on works written here. Usually I have what I consider constructive criticism, although I try to not find fault with plots and characters in the stories. I cannot help being obsessive compulsive nor having a grammar Nazi for a parent, and I wish to assist people who can actually write stories when I am not capable of so doing.

I am tempted to use Clint Eastwood (as Josey Wales) and his epitaph of the young rider, but I will cease at this: This should by rights be rated higher than a mere 5.

...especially after that horrible start to his married Life.

Such care and Love - really loved the way you weaved your words into such a magical story - simply terrific !

The Feel Good Factor is alive in this story.

Thanks Jidoka.

This is one of the truly amazing stories on this site. His treatment of his wife was perfect. Her punishment was that she didn't get to love him anymore. Her life would be alone without him. And as much as he loved her, you can instantly turn it off. She was no longer the woman he married. She had been replaced by a cheating slut that would obey her lover at the expense of her husband. You can love the person she used to be and hate the new person. The birth announcement was the perfect closure to his past life. Ruin both of them with no effort.

The match up between him and the two girls was excellent. Their needs along with his personality was a perfect fit. The ultimate revenge is living well with no thought to those who cheat on you. On of the best stories and writers on this site. Thanks for the offering.

PeteCedar

Two things I couldn't understand:

1. Why Gavin abandoned the Santos family - bizarre to me

2. Why marry Amy? Why not a ménage à trois with both cousins?

You don't need a piece of paper. You can still make make love, make babies 'n' all.

You don't have to stand up in a church and pretend you need the blessing of some imaginary god. Surely they've enough life experience by now to transcend the god delusion.

My only question is why did Ann Marie returning leave him out of the family? Otherwise, a fantastic story.

Interesting relationships. Some people don't understand, living together is a pale imitation of marriage. Without God, life is empty. The Hero in this story hit the highlights.

Please write more

I really loved your writing. The reader feels numb when you want them to. They feel pain at your whim, and happiness as you see fit. Simply a fantastic story!