All Comments on 'Forever Yours Ch. 06'

by vanalas

Sort by:

Newest First Oldest First

6 Comments

judojon almost 7 years ago

have so gotten into your story cant wait for the next chapter . Please dont make us wait to long. thanks John

Anonymousalmost 7 years ago

Commrnts

I love your story, but since you asked for comments so here goes. You need to keep better track of who is talking. In one case in this chapter you said that "Marcos said to Marcos". You also need to keep track of tense "he or she not they" . I know this is nit picking but you want to improve your writing. So keep trying as I really enjoy your stories.

Anonymousalmost 7 years ago

great

Another great chapter. Thank you.

Anonymousalmost 7 years ago

Awesome

Wow talk about a roller coaster ride. That was the most exciting, excruciating, hot as fuck sex, yet most loving. It had everything including a cliffhanger ending. Yiu made me wet cream my pants, cry, laugh, and now anticipate the next chapter. LOVE THIS STORY...

Anonymousalmost 7 years ago

Wow..

Awesome..

o2byoung almost 7 years ago

So it's a ploy - Watch out Ramon!

I wonder what she will try to do next?

Our Comments Policy is available in the Lit FAQ

Post as:

Anonymous

vanalas@vanalas

146 Works

228 Followers

I have been successful probably because I have always realized that I knew nothing about writing and have merely tried to tell an interesting story entertainingly. My own experience is that once a story has been written, one has to cross out the beginning and the end. It is th...

Live Webcams 218 Online!