All Comments on 'Future Family Incest'

Try to vary your sentances. It gets REALLY boring when you use the same subject-predicate construct. Plus, the futuristic setting is lame. For example: She got in her skycar. She started her skycare. She drove 2.5 miles (why isn't it kilometers by then?) to the store. She parked the skycar in the store. Get it? Also, by 2075, we won't be one race. I will still be alive in 2075, and I am not "one race

Sadly, this was extremely repetitive and unconvincing. The identical paragraphs save for "find and replace" on the names made the whole story incredibly tedious. There is no build up and even in 2075 (which is not that far away), I simply do not believe that a father and mother would say let us have sex and the children would immediately say yes. Furthermore, the idea of people all having "Japanese" eyes and brown skin and yet still have strawberry blonde hair and blue eyes seems to ignore basic genetics. Either we are all like Louis Wu in RingWorld (mid-brown, brown eyes, black hair) or we are not. Blue eyes and blonde hair are recessive genes so they will not triumph in a real melting pot culture.

Sci Fi writers often forget the basic fundamentals of telling a story (i.e. characterisation, plot, narrative, suspense etc). This is, I am afraid, a good example.

Really, its like.. Lacy gives the son a bj. and kacy gives her dad one, right after another.. maybe mix it up. and the skycar.. um.. weird..

Like a man on a crutch - lame.

All this person did was type one paragraph then copied pasted for next paragraph but changed names...Boring!!!

you story has to b the most boing one i have ever read and i only read every other sentance

not funny, sexy, erotic, or interesting at all. Boring! You should get a job that doesn't require writing or any typ of imagination because you suck at both.

In one word "Boring"

My ten year old can write better and my fourteen year old neighbor probably knows more about sex. Finish high school and pay more attention in your English/Language Arts classes.

One of the most fucked up story ever. If the author ever went to school, it didn't show it here. He needs to go back to school, learn some english, get laid a few times, then he can attempt to write again. But for now, shut the fuck up! You have no clue what the fuck you are talking about!

You should not be writing porn. You need to quit cuz you suck, boring, repetitive, no real story. I'm sorry but it was just stupid.

What the hell is this? This shit is hella boring and stupid. You repeat the same shit a thousand times. You need to learn how to write because this sucks hot ass. It made absolutely no sense. Read what you write and don't post another piece of crap like this.

If there was a story here and real emotions, I missed them both. What a waste of time.

THIS STORY DOES NOT HAVE A LOT OF EXCESS WORDS BUT GETS TO THE POINT OF WHAT A GOOD INCEST STORY SHOULD BE ( FAMILY FUCKING).

I WOULD LIKE TO SEE MORE DETAILS ABOUT TIT FOUNDLING.

ALSO SEED INJECTIONS.

WHAT MAKES INCEST GREAT IS IT IS A NO NO

That was the worse writing ive seen on here yet. That was 3rd grade work, minus the sex stuff. Had a hot plot BUT was so poorly written I couldnt read it for long.

you really think copy/paste repetition is the way to write a story? lazy lazy lazy

the story was so patent - most of it was repetitious - and having Breakfast at 10.45am and the Lunch at 12.10pm is a bit far out dont you think - go back and read it and then try and write it again - Jena121

Very boring,about as erotic as a kipper,try again.But 25 for having a go.

Written like a three year old would write......if a three year old was writing porn. Too many short sentences. Go back and re-write it as an adult would.

If you had only one story online I would think you had purposely written this poorly as a joke! That would have shown imagination, getting us to read something so awful it could only be this bad as a goof. Normally I would say, at least you gave it a go, try to improve. In this case, please do not write again! There is no hope of improvement!Do something, anything else.

I agree with the majority opinion that this is truly awful writing. Yes, you have spent a great deal of time and effort, but it hasn't worked. You would be better off using your energies elsewhere - perhaps taking those dog(s) for long walks in the country, which they would love and which might give you inspiration.

This is unbelievably awful writing. sort of a good concept, but maybe you should learn to use a thesaurus to start

WHAT MADE ME LAFF AT HOW SHIT THIS STORY WAS IS THIS BIT: after the game/tv show matt and lacy stand up and say WE WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH THE BOTH OF YOU, to which the obvious reply from any son and daughter according to this FUCK NUGGET is, yes we would like to have sex with you, FUCKIN HELL, THE CHARACTERS SOUND LIKE THEY'RE FROM THE MOVIE borat(ALI G'S CHARACTER) yesss i like the family sex....number two prostitute in kazakhstan........RUBBISH STORY, RUBBISH LAY OUT....fucking hell what was even more stupid is when this FUCK NUGGETS describing the characters how can u have a medium sized pussy lol didn't know they come in large small and medium, mmmm next time i pull i'll make sure i ask if her freakin minge is medium or small, i ain't boning no large pussy".......THIS WRITERS a psychzofrenic maniac and shouldn't be allowed in public haha

I can't spell, I can't even get my grammar correct moost of the time, but come on man... the whole thing sounds like a screen play, but it isn't written like a screen play. this is the worst story i have ever read in my life

This story? appears to have been written? by a youngster who was daydreaming to get out of a test. I lost interest within the first 2 paragraphs. EXTREMELY POOR grammer, writing, and even story line! I will NOT waste my time reading anything else from this so-called writer.

Everything was so staged that I got bored and only read 1/2 of all the rest. You know that sex stories should have some excitement in it ... Sorry about the bad comment.

Incest is not unti whole family is not induled, go ahed call grand parent when babies becom fucable. enjoy mom with dad after reading !!

What the hell did I just read ? this was so mechanical i was bored by the third paragraph

HORRIBLE!! YOU SHOULD BE ARRESTED FOR SUCH TERRIBLE WRITING!! I WANT TO DESTROY MY COMPUTER FOR EVER HAVING SUFFER YOU "WRITING".IT SHOULD BE ILLEGAL THAT YOU HAVE ACSESS TO THE INTERNET!!!!

I lost interest straight away after reading ( His dick is 11 inches long by 3.5 inches wide.) 20/07/20

Stilted. It sounded like a private detective reading his notes to his client.