All Comments on 'Galactic War Ch. 01'

Enjoyed the story and look forward to the drama with his old team but there were parts where the story felt jumbled. Was it just me? Any who good story and I look forward to future installments

starts out with living with parents. then shifts to they were kidnapped and killed. There has to be another full chapter explaining that little slip. maybe he was adopted or they divorced and remarried setp parents. or something.

I like the premise of the story but it is very inconsistent. The parents are alive, then the family is dead. There are missed words or poorly worded sentences. You skip from past tense to present tense. I ended up distracted by the grammatical errors. And Bus... one s.. I like the story but you need to clean it up. See if your u can find an editor.

I started reding this first chapter, and got all the way to the fifth paragraph, before I had enough and skipped to the end of the page to leave this message:

You need to get an editor to go over this with you as there is too much inconsistency - even in this first chapter/page. It takes too much work to make sense of the storyline and the characters!!

like NOW! You don't use past/present/future tenses correctly, you use the wrong words to describe something, you misspell words A LOT, you leave out words A LOT, you add unneeded words A LOT, you mix up what happened to characters, you have parts of the story that look like they don't even belong in certain places (like they were mistakenly copied and pasted there) and all this put together means your story is a jumbled, all over the map, confusing ball of what in the world! It has great potential but PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE get an editor ASAP!

So I figured it out, it's not written in English. Your grammar isn't just bad, it's nonexistent.

So Jerry is punched in the mouth and I'm straight here to leave this comment.

This story is unreadable.

Anonymous comments should be banned.

Good bones of an idea. But is virtually unreadable without some serious editing.

Finally looking at this FIRST atempt over again made me cringe with self hate. I published this way too soon. It was writen in just hours and I thought, for my first attempt at writing anything for over a decade I could still do it, I was horibly wrong.

I want to apologize for this but it's here. I would edit this right now if I knew how, but generally it's here and I think having that first attempt for anyone to see is something that I should have. A snipet of sorts. Rushing to my own conclusions. I love the story but I agree with all of the comments it could have used MORE polishing.

I love you all and I hope you have a great day.

xD \\Kal Darov// Dx