All Comments on 'Goal-Oriented'

Great story,hope you have more :)

I loved your story can't wait to see what happens next.

Thank you.

Magnificent... you've done a superb job of drawing a vivid picture with your words. It was a lovely, gloriously erotic story wonderfully told be a very fine writer. Thank you!!! AVL

This story is great as a stand-alone, but has so much potential that it would be a shame to abandon it at this point.

Keep writing. Loved the story.

Really nice story here. It would be nice to see how they progress from here along with the other girls. I can't help but wonder though how long before Brin and Kelly are discovered and who will be the one one to discover them. Gina I think is interesting too. I hope that at some point you get more of the girls involved in the fun some way. Maybe a coach or two. All out girl orgies are fun too. College is a great place for mix & match. Good luck with the writing.

Please make a continuation of this! I'd love to see this one continue. There's so much you could do with this.

Please add a chapter 2 to this story. I would love to see where their relationship ends up at.

This was great. I, too, would love to see how the story progresses. What happens after the week of camp and they go back to their lives? As much as I love lesbian orgies, I think this story would work best if it was just between Brin and Kelly.

This was almost too soft and painful and real for an erotica website. Much more like masturbating to the thought of your crush than getting yourself off to porn. You're amazingly talented! Keep it up!

I really like this story and the interactions you've started, it takes time to warm up and you did just that. I really hope you'll continue this story!

Thank you

L

I know how it feel to ignore or suppress your feelings thru high school - and Im not gay. Once it comes, then this story captures that rapture... even if short-lived among peers? Well see with Kelly..... (actually I knew a Kelly - not a good experience but thats not everybody's)

Aw, i very much liked this story. It was sweet.

With some work this could be like, you know, literature.

A beautiful story, very thoughtful, so very real

Really really well written.

The characters, the plot, their behaviour was convincing and the sex was tremendous.

Really loved this story.

Please write more. I'll be looking for you :)

S.

I would also love to read a continuation of this story. It's well written and hits very close to home.

looking forward to reading your next installments. really enjoyed this story and your handling of it. hope you continue with this and other stories. i was glad to see the detail and characters explored here. thank you for your writing and sharing.

very good first effort here.

jan

Loved it. I'm a guy, and I really like lesbian fiction. This was some of the best writing - WRITING!!! - I have ever seen. The whole thing. The people. The love. The sex. Everything.

I was breathless with excitement, taken right into the whole encounter, almost unable to pull myself away.

Please write some more. Brin and Kelly, anyone. Doesn't have to be any sex in it. You've got an enormous talent for scenes, for pacing, for all of it.

Excellent characterization, brilliantly written. Dialogue is perfect, believable, & realistic.

Witty, astute, a few of your lines are so funny I rolled out of bed laughing, just hung there laughing & struggling not to fall on the floor.

You're the kinda writer I wanna be when I grow up. Problem is I'm 30 now. Bummer.

Thanks for this. It made me laugh, made me cry, made me cum, & it was memorable, exquisite, haunted me, so I came back a few days later to read it again. Powerful stuff. You're gifted, really, you are a rare talent. I'm thankful to have found this beautiful story.

There are not enough adjectives to describe this "awesome" experience displayed in writing. Love is like that - hard to describe and timeless in remembrance. Interpunctual, I echoe the same sentiment as every other commentors in saying your work is exceptional and I hope you grace us with part 2, cause what happens when they go back to their respective schools. How does this experience shape their lives. In the interim, thank you in advance for sharing your gifts of storytelling & writing with us.

The ending was so cute and considering I'm a hop skip and jump away from Rutgers it was funny to see the name pop up in a story

Absolutely gorgeous.

The characters are revealed with a light touch. The sex is described with a perfect balance of sensuality, raw physicality, and clarity. You tackled a subject which can easily be swamped by cloying emotion or melodrama, and instead you made it urgent and real and fucking sexy.

I agree with other commenters here: regardless of subject or genre, this is a good read. Personally, I don't need to read more about these characters. This story is complete and satisfying as it is. But whatever you write next, I want to read it.

This was so adorable!!!!! You did an amazing job.

PERFECT!!!!!!!!!!!!

I really loved this one. I would have preferred it be a bit longer, but it was very good. Thank you for sharing it with us!

Mmm, your description of the sounds and sensations of fingers in pussies was amazing, so intense.

I loved it. Hope you have plans for more like this? Many thanks.