All Comments on 'Gold Chains Ch. 01'

great start hope there is more and she makes him feel bad please update soon

I bit rushed, but a good start x

More?

Please update soon! Can't wait to see the aftermath.

I like the idea and would love to see where this is going. Maybe a few words of constructive criticism/advice?

Please don't rush it. Taking your time to describe what's happening, providing good detail, really fleshes out a story. I think many of us here would rather read a chapter that's a few pages long, but well detailed, than a rushed 1 pager. Of course you can still give good detail and have it be one page, that's fine!

Also, please provide more backstory and characterization in the next chapter. This chapter didn't make me feel anything for Rania or Marcus. They felt one dimensional and since I knew bare-to-none about them the scene didn't have the impact I'm sure you wanted it to.

Like I said earlier I like the idea and I want to see where you take it :)

I'd say it's a good start but you should probably have more description. I look forward to seeing more and why she was kidnapped.

It was a good story, but as for me it would have been a good start for a story, you should take more time on that story. Like adding more details. But anyhow that was a pretty awesome. Good luck on your second story!!! And also looking forward too