All Comments on 'Gold Digger Ch. 01'

But who the hell is Denise. His wife's character keeps switching from Denise to Diane. Overall, the story line is quite good, and I presume there is going to be a Chapter 02. 3* for this one.

With Apocalystic proportions.... A mega war on justin and his bitch.

Jan there is still hope.

So they went looking for a control group that has never watched porn...they dropped the study because they couldnt find enough people. So how the sam fuck do you expect us to believe that this geek didnt know the first thing about deep throating?

And how convenient that the lovers talk about everything that hubby really wanted to know the first time he used a hidden microphone that didnt pick up the wind or the ocean.

And at his wealth, who marries for love? Its all about convenience.

re:

A university in Utah wanted to do a stufy on the effects of porn on the male brain

So they went looking for a control group that has never watched porn...they dropped the study because they couldnt find enough people.

-----------------------

They never heard of, for example the Amish?

And some of the Mormon sects are pretty strait-laced.

But a University in Utah couldn't find or never even heard of any religious groups that avoided porn?

Good story, Imagine that, a actress who has made her staring role as wife to a young, rich guy. Not like that has even happened before. Our protagonist had the wool pulled over his eyes, but is saved by his own powers of observation.

Await how the retribution.

a little bit dense, as in lots of talky verbose paragraphs, but overall a good setup of the drama. Be curious to see if he goes the cuckold route or mans up. Not sure what it means that the decision to seek legal counsel was "taken out of his hands", but we will all find out.

Well author , you have set up a very intriguing storyline, and I'm very much hooked for now.

eagerly awaiting.......

Excelsior!

But, as another comenter mentioned, having her name suddenly changed from Diane to Denise is reeaaalllly annoying.

Go back to Diane -- I had a very nice girl friend with that name (and I was the one that

blew the relationship).

good beginning to the story. it is easy to fall in love with someone if they match what u want out of a relationship. she knew what she wanted and she gave it all to get it. glad that he woken up to facts and so fast got all he needed for the next stage. but he has yet to find out just how much she has taken from him and just how far she is willing to go to keep what she has. hope the next chapter soon

One person's vermose or too many descriptions is another person's detail that makes the characters and situations real. If past experience from SteveLee's stories is repeated, those seemingly surplus words will be of significance in later chapters.

Incidentally, Jeff obviously understood deep throat, but, as the author explained, he was infatuated and never thought that she knew what she was doing. That might be hard to believe, but men, or women, don't see clearly when in ove

I apoligize for the Diane-Denise error. Very poor proof reading. Denise was the proper name, the auto-correct software changed it to Diane one time and I didn't catch it.

WTF...he let them continues with out any repercussion?!

Need ch-2 where he burn the whore/bitch's ass n stomp n break Justin's legs hands n balls...

The bitch deserves to b punch n have her cling cut off too...

I hate whore sluts or bitches...

If it was me both will end up dead ...

3* coz ending not good..

Why do you feel compelled to tell us something unexpected is going to be happening soon. Why not just let the dialogue and action take us into the unexpected events? Its kind of annoying, and deflates the suspense and drama.

And making alibis for the character being stupid and naive is kind of weird. You created the character, and its pretty obvious he's stupid and naive, so how is the story helped by making excuses for him? Is that supposed to make the character more believable or real? Jeff deserves what is happening to him. He ignored his wife's behavior and spending habits, he ignored all the telltale signs from the beginning of their relationship, and he seems to be very reluctant to do anything about it now that he has her dead to rights. He's acting not like a geek or a nerd, but a classic wimp. Is that what you want us to think about him?

I hope he goes to the gonad store before the next chapter. Jeff needs some better equipment.

wife watching cuck fag.

I personally dislike these types of stories being written in the 3rd person as it detracts from the personal feel. Writing in the 1st person is a far more convincing method of portraying emotions which is really the backbone of these tales. Unfortunately I found this about as exciting as reading the instruction manual for my new cellphone. 2 **

I'm going to hold scoring and most comments till the end, but two things:

I'm a little surprised that nothing was made of the switch of landscaping to Justin's company. I don't know if it was just to throw some cash her lover's way, or if it was to allow for some bed time with Justin!

Re: Name mix-up - I had read the comments before the story, so saw that comment, yet I was still so into the story that I didn't even notice. That's good writing!

I just hate stories win which the "author" can't even remember the name of one of his principal characters. You went from Denise to Diane and back to Denise in succeeding paragraphs. Why?

I also found the writing style somewhat stilted as though you were trying to impress the readers with your "excellent vocabulary." Too bad, though, because this should be an interesting and excellent story.

don't always pan out, TK U MLJ LV NV

I am liking the story line, but the execution seems to lack emotion. It is just friend and family suspicions, blind hubby, interesting realizations and discovery mechanics so far.

May be that is the writer's perceptions of how a "geek" would deal with the relationship fraud. Four Stars and hoping the story improves as it moves forward.

Thanks for sharing.

The last paragraph lost you two stars. Frankly, I'm not sure I care to continue.

illiterate cuck shit.

How did I miss this ??? It's not great literature, but it's first rank pulp friction' . The author manages to espouse traditional values , while inserting continuous sense of morbid irony. There was great, sloooow tension buildup with Diane, her enigma and then breadcrumbs started piling up faster and faster, culminating in her damming oral reveal.

Full marks * * * * *

4* but that may reduce if story continues in this manner. I agree last paragraph lost a lot of sympathy for the main character.

Not sure what was with name change. No explanation of when why or how she took up with justin

A point was made about females fooling males. Females have inherent ability to lie - deceive. Might stem from admiring girlfriends new hairdos all the time.

I knew a female who fooled all but one of the thousands of people she came in contact with during her life. Her half brother's wife was not for a nanosecond fooled calling her - yep you guessed it - golddigger.

However that characteristic is not relevant to the following. In her late 40s continuing into mid-50s she was writing instructor at technical college in Helena, Montana.

For 4+- years she also owned and operated a candy store.

All the female students, ranging from 18 to mid50s, married and single regarded her as the epitome of class, refinement, and style. I overheard numerous conversations in which she was praised or held up as the perfect role model of the century's professional woman.

Perfectly coiffed, fingernail professionally manicured and polished. Make-up exceptionally applied - never went a day when a ''fill'' was not applied.

Even middle-aged professional women idolized her. Sweet, caring, kind, well-spoken and never and I do mean NEVER was there a thought birthed by anyone suggesting she was not the most moral faithful wife. True, many males noted the sway of her womanly hips - she danced competitively for years - the Latin dances were her preference...but even those most sensual movements had an elegance about them. More than the sexual appearance some flaunt, you were entranced by her grace.

She fooled all from construction workers, to world champion Formula One race car drivers, renowned plastic surgeon, movie stars, athletes, millionaire businessmen, and all but one female.

EVERYONE!

You would be roundly attacked and shunned at that two year college if you let slip any thoughts of a lascivious nature as to what that perfect hourglass figure with her dancer training would do once those hips began their ''lambada''

You would be villified as a liar. Stones would be cast your way, fists would find your nose as enthralled males rushed to defend her stellar reputation.

However, as one male noted having found out she had implant surgery to offset the result of nursing her quite attached second son, her breasts are a metaphor as in, she presents a FALSE FRONT.

She was the Compleat Narcissist. Manipulative, deceitful, intentionally cruel, spiteful and vindictive. Married three times but not once for love. As a single female she had affairs with married men, cheated on boyfriends but was known to become uncontrollably furious and physical should a boyfriend even converse with another female.

Sexually Little Miss Prim and Proper was what some might call deviant. Orgy participant, FFM threeway, begged for hair grabbing ''Take that Bitch'' facials. Obsessed with being called a whore during orgasms, relished performing analingus - she did not just lick but would force tongue into rectum. Goes to say she frequently offered anal sex - no lubrication.

BEGGED, AS IN REPEATEDLY PLEADED, FOR ONE LOVER TO URINATE ON HER CLITORIS. She would call him to bathroom while she sat naked on the toilet, legs wide open while she vulgarly pulled herself open and used index finger to tap on clit telling him right here right here.

She was squirter capable but first time it happened she thought she had peed. In cowgirl position she told lover, but dismounted and began licking and sucking the wetness of his cock commenting about saltiness...soaked through sheets, pad, and left Lake Superior wet spot in mattress to week to dry.

Multi-orgasmic with curses being screamed. Loved bringing cumfilled panties home to third husband, sniffer that he was. We are talking two full loads of a younger male less than an hour after leaving the bed. She had student rip her bra and panties off her and after 7 hours of

sex went to teach class no bra under tight thin sweater and her nipples were big and erect, breasts bouncing-surgery was type that is permanent push-up bra so ledge to bounce up and down -no panties and she orgasmed while emailing that night of standing within few feet of front row students as semen oozed out and down inside of her thighs...I was in fron row that day and you could see her face flush with sexual glow. Lots of looks as everyone noted her nipples...as she stood for a few minutes directly in front of me, I looked down to avoid staring at breasts and saw cum trailed to just below knee.

After class, outside in parking lot class congregated without planning to verify we saw what we did. I noted her

About 100 feet away talking to male student. Hurried to my car and, at a distance, followed their cars to a truck repair shop. They walked up some covered stairs together.

I recognized student. Sought him out next day as I knew him well.

She had threatened to flunk him semester before. She had hots for his big muscular vein popping arms. He refused. The current semester she flat out told him she would file a sexual assault charge, claiming he tried to rape her in her office during their semester review meeting. He told of how while he was examaning papers as he stood at table she had come up and hip-pinned him rubbing her breasts back and forth on his arm...told of another in school hallway talk during which she flipped pages of book on his lap and each turn she rubbed against his crotch...in full view of people walking by...she got so bold so light grazing became milking stroke. He was in sweatpants no underwear that day. She only stopped when evidence appeared on pants. Leaning over and in sultry voice whispering ''Ooo...you're leaking''

Glad he caught up with this devious bitch. Very happy he didn't turn cuck after watching them in the act. Let's finish it.

that the fire was coming, TK U MLJ LV NV

A bit too flowery language IMO but otherwise good. Except of course the inability to call the wife one name throughout, it gradually changed from Diane to Denise. Very careless and extremely irritating.

The story itself is good. It has the depth and detail to be a solid, compelling read.

The writing needs a proofreader. The wife’s name kept flipping between Diane and Denise. Her paramour Justin became Justine at least once.

It also needs an editor. Much of the detail is written from a very dry third-person POV. There isn’t much dialog, and there’s even less emotion. I want to be angry at the wife, and feel bad for Jeff — but can’t quite get there because none of their emotions get through the storytelling.

I sincerely believe that the author can do better, and recommend rewriting with the help of an editor, with the goal of bringing out the characters’ emotions.

Who is he married to ? Diane or Denise .. how about a proof reader in future?

Time to set both of these cheating assholes on fire. She's a pragmatic, cold hearted bitch.

It might have been a have way descent story but the Diane Denise thing was just too distracting couldn't finish it

Whatever he is, he ain’t dumb. Bitch is going to burn.

4 pages for what could have been 2, maybe 3 at most. is her name Diane or Denise?

Diane/Denise, Justin/Justine was disconcerting. Needs a proofreading. Beta testing would be nice. But the story is a good one. Looking forward to its continuation.

Ha, I won’t even mention ‘Denise/Diane’, seems like that dog’s already been kicked to the curb. But, a good start on what looks to be a really good story. Looking forward to the next chapter. Thanks for the story, Steve.

Unreadable garbage

Good story way over the top in getting there. I smim read two pages.