All Comments on 'Heading North'

by tinybabelost

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  • 15 Comments
Rawmaster50Rawmaster50about 10 years ago
Very good start

5 stars because you never left your Little girl's mind throughout the story. You knew which erogenous zone works the best. Hopefully you will explore this little girl's mind some more to find the source of her need. Keep writing please

SplendidSpunkSplendidSpunkabout 10 years ago
Not a Unique Story

But accomplished with such style. At times I felt I was in the room with them. Perfect length, long enough to develop the characters, short enough to avoid repeating yourself. Flowed well with good pace. Top marks, thank you

SingleDad1234SingleDad1234about 10 years ago
Very well written

I vividly pictured everything going on in this story. Keep writing!

mel_pomenemel_pomeneabout 10 years ago
A lovely story!

A great introduction to your talent as a writer, tinybabelost - thank you. I would like to add my welcome too, and give you five stars for a wonderful effort; it's good to have you aboard!

I can offer only these two tips: keep writing, and if you do get any harsh comments, try not to take them to heart. You write well and we love you!

MabelCinnamonMabelCinnamonabout 10 years ago
Wow...

I've read these stories before but this one was just right... I'm gonna make my bf read it... Hopefully it will give hime some ideas. Great job!

AnonymousAnonymousabout 10 years ago
Great writing

Short, focused, complete and it all held together. Congrats. Writing this good takes effort. Be proud of this.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 10 years ago
Well done tinybabelost you may well have found your calling ;-)

An excellent story and very descriptive so much so I felt I was in the room watching you both! Keep up the fine work you will go far babe ;-) Lord Legin x

Bert_FeggBert_Feggabout 10 years ago
really really good

that's all :)

worshipper622worshipper622about 10 years ago
Excellant!

Continue please.

patientleepatientleeabout 10 years ago
Excellent final line.

Very well done. Hot and well-written. I don't usually care for second person, but this worked. Looking forward to what comes next.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 10 years ago
Fuck that's hot

This was fantastic. I will for sure be reading more of your work if you post again.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 10 years ago

That was amazing, please keep writing more, you wrote with a great perspective and kept a really good pace, it was believable (Unlike most erotica) and it helps that the girl sounds like my type ;) Really though, good job, keep up the good work.

thelovingsadistthelovingsadistalmost 10 years ago
Well done

Second person and using parentheses so much in the first part threw me a bit, but that's more about my personal preferences than the story itself.

Believable characters, acceptable plot, and well written. Good job.

stefafastefafaalmost 9 years ago
awesome

Wow. Just wow.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 3 years ago

Clever title! And soooo HOT!! I am so jealous of her!!

Anonymous
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