Her Brother Ch. 02

"I'm not hurt," I whispered against his head, breathed in the fragrance of his hair, and gave the top of his head a little kiss. I inhaled him, savouring that now familiar sweet scent, reminiscent of apples. "These things, and the memories attached to them... they're not pieces of Miles, they're pieces of you. They're experiences you've had that have brought you to where you are now, and you shouldn't try to pretend they never existed. I love your shoes, and I love your bear, and I love that picture of you. You look so sexy. The two of you looked gorgeous together! It really doesn't bother me at all. In fact, I'd really like a copy of it, if you would send it to me."

His fingers dug into my back. "Cody... you're so nice! Of course. I'll send it to you."

I nuzzled him aggressively until he turned his head to allow me a kiss. I sucked at his sweet lips and tongue until I was getting hard all over again, and for a second time he had to remind me, giggling, of pancakes.

"Damn, you are such an effective distraction!" I teased, grabbing him by the hips and giving him a little wiggle before ushering him to the kitchen. He texted me a copy of his prom photo as I organized the breakfast supplies, and then we both got to work. I fried up the bacon in a big skillet while he whipped up the pancakes. I noticed him trying to make unusual shapes as he spooned the batter into the hot pan.

"What are you up to?" I chuckled.

"I'm trying to spell your name," he sighed. "It's not going very well. It's really hard to make an 'O' without it just turning into a normal pancake... and the 'D' looks almost the same as the 'O'."

"The effort is enough to melt my heart, little bro," I laughed, bumping my hip against his. "You're so cute."

He flipped one leg back and swung it aside to thump his foot carelessly against my butt. "I can almost be romantic. There, look - the 'C' isn't too bad! Maybe I'll just let that be enough. 'C' for 'Cody'. And 'cute', and 'cuddly', and 'cock'."

"A-plus!" I congratulated him, still laughing heartily. "It's like 'Sesame Street', except really inappropriate."

"'C' is for 'Cody', that's good enough for me!" he sang in a growly Muppet voice to the tune of Cookie Monster's iconic anthem, "C is for Cookie".

I was howling by this point, and close to tears. Julien was set off purely by the force of my amusement, and we laughed throughout most of the remainder of our breakfast preparation, interrupted occasionally by the need for kisses.

We sat on the living room sofa to eat, because there was no one to tell us not to. We stuffed ourselves with crispy bacon and fluffy pancakes dripping with butter and thick syrup. Even the milk was a rich treat - I'd been stuck with nonfat for so long that I'd forgotten what milk was supposed to taste like. We had seconds, and even thirds, and by the time we were ready to surrender our plates, all we could do was groan and languidly cuddle on the sofa.

"I think I could die happy now," Julien mumbled, the side of his face smushed against my chest.

"Please don't," I protested lazily. "I've grown attached to you."

"Okay. So what should we do now, while we're still alone?"

My hand slid slowly down and cupped his soft cock and balls. "I feel like that question deserves a sexual answer, but I'm soooo full."

"Me too. Seriously, it's okay. I wouldn't want to get motion sickness."

I chuckled as much as my laziness would allow. Julien was the first to gather the strength to move. He reluctantly peeled himself from my bloated body and staggered over to dig through one of his boxes.

"Is it 'Game of Thrones' time, do you think?" he asked. "Or I could set up my Wii, and we could play some 'Mario Kart' or something."

I voted for the former option, not having energy for much other than lying back and passively watching a screen. We enjoyed a lengthy cuddle in front of the TV, with Julien tucked affectionately under my arm, at times wrapping an arm around my chest and practically crawling into my lap. The sensation of him clinging to me was deeply satisfying. He constantly assured me in tacit gestures of his genuine feeling for me. The sweetness of these small gestures highlighted everything that had been missing in my relationship with Lisette.

This was what I wanted in a relationship - just being able to sprawl out on the sofa with someone, cuddle, relax, and bask, while Lise always wanted to go somewhere, have drinks, and be social, during which I mainly waited on the sidelines, babysitting her purse and awaiting the fulfillment of my designated driver duties. In retrospect I found it hard to comprehend that I'd let myself become such a doormat, and even worse, that I'd been made to feel fortunate to be her doormat.

"Is it just me, or is this absolutely perfect?" I whispered, squeezing him closer to me and nuzzling his soft hair.

"So perfect," he sighed. His legs tangled with mine in delicious knots. "I need every Saturday morning to be like this from now on."

We were into the third episode of "Game of Thrones" when Lisette came home. We disentangled ourselves from one another and sat up. I paused the show, knowing she wouldn't abide it. I felt very suddenly tense and nervous as I heard her footsteps, and the distinctive jingle of her keys, which I hadn't realized had become familiar until this moment. I spared Julien a quick glance. He had hunched up his shoulders and crossed his arms, closing himself off. He had come out of his shell so much since we'd been alone together, but now, he was once again the shy little teenager, accustomed to being steamrolled every time he tried to stand up for himself. I felt sorry for him. We had both been victims of Lisette's narcissistic need for excessive control. I could not comprehend how much worse it must have been for Julien to grow up with her, as well as a mother whose temperament was similar to Lisette's.

She walked in with a set expression on her face. Her hair was gathered up into the casual bun I recognized as her "bad hair day" style. Wherever she'd spent last night, she hadn't had her hair dryer or arsenal of products. She carried several shopping bags, apparently having spent her morning indulging in a little retail therapy.

She set her bags on the kitchen island and looked over the mess we'd left, her expression growing steadily less and less impressed.

"Hi," I ventured after a tense pause. "Don't worry, we'll clean it up later. You doing okay?"

She looked at the mess for a few moments longer, and then shifted her gaze to me. There was something unusual in her expression. It was almost as if I could see cracks forming across her meticulously composed facade of perfection.

"Lise?" I urged. "Are we going to talk?"

She pursed her lips for a few moments before speaking. "The whole apartment smells like bacon. Are you just totally letting yourself go now? We have one little fight, and you just let yourself go?"

I almost laughed. The pure absurdity of her characterizing her unapologetic infidelity as a "little fight" tickled me, as did her perception of my consumption of bacon as a sign of my descent into a life of reckless hedonism, but I managed to keep my composure. "We just had a nice Saturday brunch. We ate what we wanted. People do that sometimes."

She spotted one of the packs of Oreos and grabbed for it, holding it up as if she'd found evidence of a crime. "And what's this?"

Now I couldn't stop myself from rolling my eyes. "Hookers and blow, Lise."

Julien sputtered behind his hands, unable to hold back a sudden burst of laughter. I shot him a little grin.

"That's not funny," Lisette replied, glaring at both of us.

"We think it is," I chuckled. "Come on - they're cookies. We didn't rob a bank."

"Well, what exactly did you do, Cody? You I obviously didn't take Julien for a haircut like I asked you."

"I don't want a haircut!" Julien cut in.

"He doesn't want a haircut," I reiterated.

Lisette let out a curt puff of breath through her nose, reminding me of an indignant horse. "Somehow I figured you wouldn't be able to handle the simplest task, so I went shopping for Julien myself."

She grabbed two of her shopping bags and came over to place them in front of her brother. "Those are some job interview clothes for you, and a proper pair of shoes. Try them on to make sure they fit."

Julien glanced at the bags, and then up at his sister. The laughter that had seized him moments ago had disappeared in a hurry. I watched him, and could see him struggling between two clashing needs: one to establish his independence, and the other to avoid what he knew would be a bitter quarrel. "Take them back, please," he finally said, his voice quiet but firm.

She stared him down. I recognized her desperation to gain control of a situation in which she had no upper hand. "Try them on, Julien. Don't argue with me."

He sucked in a deep breath and sat back on the sofa, bringing his knees up against his chest. "I don't have to do what you say. If I need clothes, I'll get them myself. I'm not a little kid, and I won't be treated like one."

I was proud of him.

"You do need them, and so far you haven't taken any initiative," Lisette retorted, pulling a shoebox out of one of the bags. "At least try the shoes. No one's going to hire you in those grotty sneakers. This is about your future, Julien. Don't be so stubborn when I'm trying to help you."

"Take them back!" he insisted, furrowing his brow. "I didn't ask for your help."

"Julien!" she snapped. "You wouldn't be living here in my apartment if you didn't need my help. It's why you're here, and for mama's sake if nothing else, you're to mind me. Now, for heaven's sake! You haven't even looked at the shoes!" Her attention shifted to me. "Cody, help me out here."

I raised my eyebrows, not expecting her to genuinely think I was still at her beck and call after everything that had gone down. "Uh... I'm with him on this one. He doesn't need them, and he didn't ask for them." I almost added that it was our apartment, not her apartment, but I certainly didn't want it to be ours now.

Her eyes flashed. "Why are you being so difficult?"

I stood up from the sofa and faced her squarely. "I'm not difficult, Lise. I'm just a man, who's allowed to have his own opinion. And so is your brother. You're treating him like a child, and he's right not to put up with it. Meanwhile, you've treated me like your little lackey for our entire relationship, and I'm well past putting up with that."

"A lackey!" she exclaimed, setting her hands on her hips. "Isn't that a bit melodramatic?"

"No, it isn't, but smashing someone's iPad is!" I returned, my voice escalating toward actual anger. "Not to mention sleeping around on your boyfriend and thinking it's equivalent to him watching porn! Just who were you with last night, huh? Tell me, who was your retaliatory lay?"

"Don't you dare talk to me like that!" she hissed, pointing an accusatory finger at me.

"Who'd you fuck, Lise?"

Her jaw fell open. I'd never dropped an f-bomb in front of her before.

"Was it worth it?" I pressed. "Was it worth fucking some other guy to try to teach me some kind of sick lesson? I can tell you for certain, all I've learned through this is just how much of a heinous bitch you are!"

For once in her life, Lisette the Beautiful didn't know what to say. Again I saw her facade begin to crumble, and she suddenly turned to flee to the bedroom, slamming the door behind her.

I let out a long breath and slowly sat back down on the sofa. After a few moments, I turned to look at Julien. He was still hugging his knees, but now he let go of them to give me a quiet round of applause.

"You don't think 'heinous bitch' was too much?" I asked, feeling a bit unsteady. I'd never lost my temper with someone before, and I wasn't sure how I felt about myself in the aftermath.

"If anything, it wasn't enough."

We were quiet for a bit, and then he uncurled himself and returned to my arms. I cuddled him close to my body. I could feel both of our hearts thumping between us. My own pulse throbbed in my ears.

"Are you okay?" I whispered. "This is pretty intense."

"Yeah, I'm okay. I just wish she was out of our lives. I can't believe we're related. I'm scared I'll never be rid of her."

I gave him a snug squeeze. "We'll get through this. I probably should try to finish talking things out with her. I need to make sure she knows things are totally over between us. She might actually still think she's going to make me grovel."

Julien sighed and kissed my cheek. "All right. I'll take care of the breakfast dishes. You've got enough of a chore ahead of you."

"That's really sweet of you, Jules." I kissed his nose, and ruffled his soft hair. "Do I have your permission to tell her about us... if the conversation goes in that direction?"

He nodded. "I don't want to hide anything."

"Me neither. I'm glad we have that in common."

We kissed once, softly, and then went our separate ways. I slipped inside the bedroom and closed the door again. Lisette was curled up on the bed with her back to me. I could see at once that she was crying. I didn't enjoy the feeling of making someone cry. I had to put in an effort not to feel sorry for her. I told myself that she was probably putting on a show deliberately to make me feel regret, because she was intimately familiar with my emotional patterns. All the same, I couldn't bring myself to be cruel. Not yet, at least.

"Lise," I said softly, sitting on the edge of the bed, "tell me one thing. Please? Was last night the first time you cheated on me?"

She sniffled. "Yes. Of course it was. I only did it because you hurt me so much."

"By watching porn?"

"Yes! I was devastated that you'd be so unfaithful to me." She shook with a few quiet sobs.

I sighed. "You know, I really am sorry about that. Not because I think it was wrong, but because I promised you I wouldn't, and I did it anyway. I would like to be a man who keeps his promises. All I can say is... I did it because I felt stifled. I don't want to be one of these guys that's like, 'I'm a man, and I have needs', but... really, it was getting impossible for me to live within your restrictions. I didn't just watch porn, Lise. I jerked off whenever I could have a little privacy from you. I needed the release. I have a lot of libido, and you rarely ever seemed interested! Even when we did stuff, you barely seemed to enjoy it. I don't understand why you even wanted to be in a relationship with me."

She curled up tighter, and continued to cry. "Cody," she finally sobbed after a couple of minutes, "am I bad at sex?"

I balked at the question, not having expected her to be so vulnerable. "Um... well... you don't really, uh... put any effort into it, I guess. You just... lie there like you're getting a doctor's exam. Maybe that's enough for some people, but... I guess most guys would kind of like to know that you actually feel something for them." I paused. "Did last night's... activities... not go so well?"

She sniffed a few times. "He was really into me. But when we got into it... he was, like... annoyed with me!"

"Did he hurt you?"

"No, nothing like that. He was just kind of ticked off. He called me 'frigid'. Said I was like a 'dead fish'. Am I that bad?"

I sighed deeply. I actually did feel some pity for her. She'd put herself on a very high pedestal, and until yesterday, I'd helped keep her up there. She only felt secure as long as she had full control, and somehow, in her twisted mind, she had genuinely thought that having sex with another man would help her regain the control she needed. Perhaps she'd expected that I would be so hurt by her infidelity that I would become desperate to gain back her faithfulness, and it seemed to have backfired on her... badly.

"Lise, I don't think I'm the right person to talk to right now if you're wanting someone to make you feel better."

She moaned and hugged a pillow against her chest. "I'm just really worried now...."

"Worried about what exactly?"

She didn't answer for a while, and when she finally did, I barely heard her tiny voice: "My job."

"Your job...?" I repeated, brow furrowing. "You were with... someone from work?" I sucked in a breath and cringed. "Oh... oh no, Lise. Tell me you didn't sleep with your boss!"

She whimpered and hugged her pillow tighter.

"You didn't!"

She gave a small nod.

"Isn't he married?" I exclaimed. "Doesn't he have kids?!"

She burst into a fresh bout of sobs, pressing her face into the sheets and wailing.

"Goddamn!" I marvelled, standing up and running my fingers through my hair. "I'm so done. This is disgusting. You're disgusting."

"Cody!" she wailed, as if she couldn't believe I would be so unkind.

"No, I have no sympathy for you anymore," I replied flatly. "I'm not going to coddle your tears and tell you it's all right. I'm actually embarrassed to have ever been your boyfriend."

"Huh-how can you say that?" she wailed, rolling over to face me. She was red and blotchy, and her eyes were streaming steadily. "I need you right now, Cody!"

"You really expect me to feel sorry for you?" I scoffed.

"I'm in a lot of pain right now," she whimpered. "It wasn't easy for me to deal with my boss having feelings for me. And you think I feel good about the fact that he has a wife and kids? Because I don't! But he said such sweet things to me, Cody, and then he turned so cold after we did it - it was very traumatizing!"

"Boo hoo," I said cynically, shaking my head. "No, Lise - whatever problems your sleazy little affair is going to cause you in the long term will be all yours to figure out on your own. I'm done with you."

"Cody... please!" she blubbered, reaching for me. "We don't have to break up. We can work through this!"

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I exclaimed, making her flinch and gasp. I backed away from her. "We were over the moment you decided to 'see other people'. I've already moved on."

"What do you mean?" she squeaked out.

"I mean we both saw other people last night, and it seems mine worked out a lot better than yours."

Lisette's mouth contracted into a tight little line, and she turned off the waterworks almost instantly. "Who were you with?"

I swallowed and took a deep breath. "I was with Julien."

"No, I mean who...." She stopped mid-sentence. Her eyes narrowed, and her voice dropped nearly a full octave. "What?"

I lowered my eyes for a few moments, and then fixed them on hers again, stalwartly, nodding. "I know it's not something you'll want to hear, but... yeah. We're kind of an item since last night."

Her face was a caricature of fury. "No. No way. You did NOT hook up with my little brother."

"I did, though."

"That's not funny!" she hollered, her voice nearly a shriek. "You're not gay!"

"Well, it seems quite apparent that I'm at least bi."

"You're mocking me!"

"I'm really not. It happened. And I think he's the best thing that ever happened to me."

She breathed in short, forceful huffs for a few moments before leaping off of the bed and rushing toward the door. I tried to get in her way, but she darted past me.

"What did you do?!" she screamed at Julien, who was washing dishes in the kitchen. She charged up to him, and he retreated, looking genuinely frightened. They rounded the island, facing off with one another. Julien's hands were dripping with soapy water.

"What did you do to my boyfriend?" she demanded, fuming and glaring at him across the countertop.

I stood midway between them, caught between rushing to Julien's side and moving to stop Lise from advancing toward him any further. I watched Julien's reaction. His chin trembled a little, but his eyes were bold.

"We made love," he said softly, his eyes shifting to mine. I wanted to make love to him again, right that very moment. I remembered how he'd giggled at me last night for calling it "making love", and insisted we call it "fucking". It certainly had been fucking, but it had also been love, and we both knew it.