All Comments on 'Homelands Pt. 01 Ch. 14'

I must say that you have improved you writing abilities significantly since you started. Your dialog, and more importantly the story itself, has improved with each chapter. I started giving you 3's and by the last couple of chapters I would have given you more than 5 stars if possible.

That's very flattering. Thank you.

JD

An interesting chapter.

There's a lot going on in his world that he isn't aware of.

The good guys could be in deep shit.

Thanks for the good chapter

Thanks, as always, DigDaddy.

I wanted to expose the reader to the Homelands slowly. We'll see more and more as the series progresses, but as you say, there is a lot more out there than Frank realized.

Thanks again.

JD

I was just thinking about this ambassador

ship or more or less exile. wouldn't that

isolate him from his family in a foreign land.

Pretty much ending the incest aspect?

Second is it possible to be a vassal to two

women at the same time? Brianna & Iva without

them knowing. He really should have thought things

through before choosing and asked a lot more questions.

For being a really "smart" guy he keeps making some pretty bad choices.

Why do i get the impression Natalie was faking being passed out? Brianna's spy...

Hurry up with pt.15 this is like waiting for next weeks episode of your fav t.v show.

Thanks for the comments, Mr. Lurker.

You are right that being stuck in a foreign land would end the incest aspect. It might be reasonable to guess that he won't be there forever. :)

That's a good question about being a double vassal. The answer is no, but I should have had Frank ask that.

You are right that Frank makes some bad decisions. Perhaps it does not come across well, but I was trying to portray him as someone with "book" smarts but not "street" smarts, if you will. Someone who may be good at abstract thinking but who has a hard time realizing that everyone has their own agenda, and doesn't really consider just how far they might be willing to go to advance it.

Chapters 15 and 16 are written, as is all of Part Two in fact. But Literotica will only post one chapter a day. If you are interested, though, you can visit my blog and download both novels in their entirety for free. Click on my profile, then go to contact and there should be a link. If it doesn't work (some people have had trouble) send me an email.

Best,

JD