All Comments on 'Hostage to Fortune'

...of the Sirens Song stories I've read so far. Quite the adventurous romance.

I loved this. One of the best stories on the site!

An excellent story and well worth five stars I was unable to put it down from start to finish.

A great story is great no matter the word count 5*

I thoroughly enjoyed the story. Interesting characters, a bit of sex, and a well told tale. Who wants more?

Didn't seem so long once I got into it.

This was a pleasurable and compelling read! I was really upset when I finally had to stop reading it last night (the old eyes were getting too tired) — the good news was that it gave me something to look forward to finishing this morning.

Always look forward to a rousing pirate story!

When you shift scenes or narrators, could you put a bar of stars between the scenes so it doesn't take a few lines for the reader to catch on to the shift.

A fine story, sad in its way. I have a bit of trouble figuring out why any of them would be attracted to each other.

Wonderful writing, as usual. Thanks for posting.

I am now a big fan. Can't wait to read more of you.

This one is riveting - I couldn't put the iPad down once I started reading it. Interesting how the perp was disposed of - it was his own stupidity that brought him to his end. Otherwise everybody ended up ok. Well done!,

... as usual! Thank you for your efforts; a most enjoyable read!

You should publish this one. Fascinating is the fact that Ryan got his due and the only collateral damage, was Will's head. Everyone else came out ahead...

Wonderful story, well told.

That I am limited to giving this story only a five! It is at least a 10 in my opinion. Thanks for such a great story!

It was a little fuzzy to me how Stephanie happened to be on McMahon's boat in the first place. But otherwise it kept me in front of the screen until the end.

Sorry I can only give this 5 starts!! Amazing story. Thank you.

Please indicate the break between situations. I was confused several times when the people doing the speaking changed suddenly without warning. I do agree with all of the positive comments, very entertaining story.

A couple of anonymous posters have mentioned the lack of markers at scene changes. I have to agree with you, I find it confusing also. There were Glyphs at the end of each scene in the original. Unfortunately, they were not standard characters and somewhere in the conversion process to make it a word file, the Glyphs got removed and I didn't notice. I hope it didn't spoil the story too much for you.

I read for enjoyment and I really enjoyed your tale. Great fun to read so thank you for sharing.

You did a fine job with this story. It was pure entertainment...and enjoyable to boot.

Thank you for a really good story.

I could write a few more adjectives but I think you get the point......I liked this story.What A Story!

because I'm a German author and English is not my nature language but I believe I'm not really bad to understand this formidable language.

However your tale is quite outstanding and truth be told I had no problem with the change of scenes.

You are on my favourit list of authors.

Die besten Grüße aus Deutschland

Frank

Thanks for this wonderful entertaining story. This is one of the best 3 I have read here on Literotica. You are a genius novelist. Please share more!

What a treat, I my in awe, thank you very much for your efforts...

Ah, it's fun. The thing with Will and his PA lost direction after the fight in the hospital. It stopped being a romance from there. She comes back into his life as useful as ever......but not really important. Eh, parts in there were still good though, including character growth. One strange thing is I don't recall there being a description of will, and he seems like a glutton type, so he was the fat cat for me. The reconciliation seemed based on pragmatism, fear, and saying I love you at dinner. That's...convenient for him.

I know stories have subplots, but the whole destabilizing nations for a boat overshadowed any romance for a large part of the time. A third is dedicated to helping the ex. While she doesn't need to burn while being buried alive, the story shifted directions, and for the first time ever, I'd rather have it broken into chapters to symbolize the major shift in the plot. The little glyphs wouldn't work, unless it was page sized. It was a bit amusing without the glyphs. It never got confusing though.

A story I read recently posted captured so many aspects of a couple in love in one and a half pages. This writing isn't what I expect for a romance story...I'd agree for the first third. It's then more of an adventure type, and with those expectations I would have probably reflected on it more favorably, but my expectations may just be wrong.

Unbelievable characters doing the most stupid shit, like a bunch of teenagers.

Glad you have so many positive comments, sorry I don't agree.

Too wordy. Superfluous side plots and meandering contemplations. The whole story could have been told in 6 or 8 pages, with more drama and excitement.

Thanks for the effort, but so far it is the worst story of the bunch.

One of the best I've ever read.

You write fairly well, but have broken the first rule of POV. There is no way the narrator can know what is happening if not there to witness it, or be told about in the story.

Why did you bother with 'I'. Stick to 3rd person POV, much easier to write.

Now to decide if I start page 3.

Thank you for writing and posting this story. I thought it was excellent.

Sorry to see the negative comments. I'm always curious about the negative comments and how many stories the authors of those comments have written.

Thoroughly enjoyed the story.

Thank you

...many “British-isms”, I will not. While some will complain about geography, sailing other technical details, I will not.

Why?

Coz it was a very engaging and enjoyable story! I just can’t a reason to nit pick. I’ll leave that to others and remain in the pleasant little post-story glow provided by these characters. Oh, some interpersonal things seemed a little silly, but so what? Real, non-fictional stuff is often (too often!) pretty silly.

Thank you.

beware of shit from anonymous assholes.

Great story and writing. So glad you kept the fifth grade level plus (U.S.A.), reading comprehension. At that level wankers had to skip it, read it more than once or ask Mum, to get it.

Kinda like keeping the social misfits spayed and neutered so they can't breed.

5*. Thanks for sharing your hard work on Lit.

x

Very nicely done tale - congratulations to you. You might consider taking it from the short story format and developing a novel. I think it would sell quite well. I am personally sorry you are forced to read the biases in some of the notes from both sides of the pond... it seems the habit of looking down on others is not confined to either the continent or the new world. Both have their prigs.

Well done and thank you, from a patriotic American.

This was an excellent story. Thank you. I hope you'll write more for us.

Chur bro awesome story

Just cringed a little at some of the editing mistakes, misspellings, etc. As others have said, this could be the basis of a novel length tale. Thank you for sharing your wonderful gift.

Another Yank here. This was a really good read with multiple morals. Never pay ransom, it never ends. Try to make sure that crime doesn't pay. Finally, and I almost hate to say this, sometimes it does help to fuck your PA.

Yes, some very obvious errors but the plot and character development were excellent. Great job!

and the takers were confused by the givers, TK U MLJ LV NV

Very confusing. It kept going to he did this to I did this, I had a hard time reading. Would have been better if it kept in the third point of view the story began in.

really enjoyabe read thankyou.

to all the moaners, i would ask for your money back, good luck.

Thank you yet again for your energy that you put into your work, the twists and turns you use always builds a strong story line

Very good story, little long but good. If there is a glaring issue it is in your transitions. The jumping in the story from one character/location to another really sucked - even putting a ****** to let the readers know a story shift is about to occur would have made the story much better flow and easier to read.

Due to this it's a 4.6*....

Yes, this is a romance so there is little intrigue and just people making eyes at each other. But given that Will, Will's Father, his Pa, and George the construction company owner are all high powered people, they should have had the number of a security company in their contacts.

When the possibility of a murder was raised, long before the BJ got close to Spain, a few calls should have started a reconnaissance operation to see what is really happening, followed by a boarding operation.

When it became obvious the author didn't want to take the story that way, I resigned myself to another bland boy meets girl limping along to touch all the bases before reaching home and the happy ever after ending.

Cut some words, fix the plot problems, restore the change of scene/person dividers (yes, you can repost a story), fix the narrator knowing too much, and it will read much better. Other commentators have told you this too.

Just read this again...enjoyed it immensely!!!!!!!

It was a nice little romp into the twilight zone. Your geography needs a few updates, Malta has some definite ties with Great Briton, hell the whole island recieved a medal for holding out during WWII.

Cyprus is a disputed island that is half Turkish and half Greek, that has the longest running UN peacekeeping force operating. I am sure both of these islands would have bent over backwards for them. Never mind just getting a frigate to stop them at any time with the GPS tracking them. But lots I liked about your romp in the med.

Other than trying to figure out how you jumped from one narrative to another being uber confusing...a good read.

A great story all the way through! Well done, and thank you!

I enjoyed this read. It was a little on the long side. Also, rapidly lurching back and forth between different peoples view points was clumsy and at times unclear. That said it was a good story overall.

...the POV changes make this a tough read.

Stories ok so. Usual DYK stuff; well a little bit more complicated. And then throw in the POV change with no hint it has changed until you’re half way through the new paragraph. Ugh.

Ok, back to the story.

It was terrific and thank you.

You've written some really great pieces, but this was the best. 5* doesn't come close to what it deserves! Well done, lass! 5*

Very poorly edited.

An almost perfect story if not for some editing problems. Overall very enjoyable though, 5 stars.

my guy. love the story but holy shit you need to put either spacing in between character changes or write in the name of the character who’s POV we’re seeing. trying to guess whos talking each time is annoying. editing needs a lot of work

Sales - something the stereotypical woman loves in the stores.

Sails - objects used by sailboats to provide propulsion from the wind.

Homonyms are your friends, when used correctly.

Outside that, as others have said, spacing or something between changes of PoV would be bloody marvelous! ;)

I think it was a great story I do not usually write comments as I am not a writer but enjoy reading if I do not like something about the story I am reading i close it of and find something I do enjoy it is humorous to read some of the comment but a lot of them must be insulting to the writer and I suggest they should keep the insults to themselves or buy books and pay for the right to criticize the stories on this site are free to enjoy and select what you want to read , this story is great and very enjoyable THANK YOU AND ALL THE STARS AVAILABLE

Loved it.

Very good and very creative. Parts were hard to follow when the speaker changed without any notification. Well detailed and presented.

Thank you for sharing your talent and tales with us.

Any flaw is a triviality. You've got characters, you've got plot, and finely flowing narrative. Thanks for this fine tory.

Excellent read. Thanks

Way, way to long!!! Why did I read trough all 15 pages then? It was way, way toooooooo good to put down!

A great plot, cool characters, justice for the evil, mercy for the naïve, and happily ever after for the hero and heroine. Wish real life were like that. Guess I will just have to suffer, I only got 53 years with a goddess.

THC

Top of the Line... ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Absolutely the best

Always remember those that can't do teach or criticize. That said I gave it a 5, however; I would have liked a little more differentiation when you changed speakers. Sometimes it was momentarily confusing. ALWAYS remember the first sentence. Great job

Great yarn, thanks. However, on page 2 the author wrote, "I'd always found him a bit creepy, a bit like Uriah Heap,…" Had me confused? What did an English 60's band have anything to do with it? Then I discovered Uriah HEEP not HEAP was a fictional character, in Charles Dickens's novel David Copperfield. The title "Uriah Heep" has become a byword for a 'falsely humble hypocrite.'

No such thing as too long when its a good entertaining tale simply because a good tale takes time to tell. Good job...5 stars..JZK

Top quality. The changing point of view was bump in the road. Overall a splendid job. Thank you.

Good story, yet the change of direction was a little confusing at fist between characters. Some put a line or a new chapter in their storytelling. I understood it after I figured out how you write, like I said well done.

Fascinating novelette. ( couldn't put it down...) you write so very well. I wish I could see the movie.