All Comments on 'Humiliation at Mollie's Brothel'

I'm reading these three in order.

I think this will not be to everyone's taste, and I didn't love it either. But i think you have something going for you as a potential writer. Less cliched, less hackneyed, like you're talking to a more intelligent reader.

Can i make a recommendation? Have you ever read Joseph Conrad's "The Secret Sharer" or Daphne du Maurier's "The Scapegoat"? Both of these excel at establishing the intelligent, nuanced, confidential rapport with the reader that i think you are going for.

Both are short, wouldn't take you too long to read. Robert Graves' "I Claudius" is much longer, but also great in that way.

A lot of explanatory exposition in this one, especially at the beginning. I don't know how else you'd handle it, but I think it does weaken the story.

I will take Anonymous' advice and read Conrad and Du Maurier. I've started Conrad's "Heart of Darkness" a couple of times, but never got through it.

I very much appreciate the comments, both here and on my other stories.

I read I, Claudius many years ago when I was a kid. Really enjoyed it then. I should pick it up again. (A second reply to Anonymous' comment.)

There are sadists everywhere. Sal is just one more.