All Comments on 'I Hate Valentine's Day'

Why did you change from James to Greg? James invited her to the party but yet when she tried to get a new outfit for it, she ends up fucking James' son, Greg? And after she had already made out with him one time. I thought she wanted to fuck James, who had invited her to the party? Did I miss something? I scored you on that basis...

your writing sucks = don't give up your daytime job!

Nice story. I hope there's more coming. Being a 40-something myself, naturally I'm rooting for James. Keep up the good work.

Great from an older guy. Hope the older one wins out. Please continue.Ethan

Keep writing! Ignore the wankers that flame you and just keep writing. BTW, you can buy a cheap disposable camera, have a friend take some pix of you, then take it to a 1 hour photo place where they'll scan all the pix for you. It costs between 3-5 dollars. Then, you can post a pic of your bad self! No more excuses!

xoxo!

Fflow

why would you stop in the middle?why would you change from father to son in the middle?you don't stop without telling about the v d party.it was all right until you brought the son in it.get us excited and then just stop how lame.from now on don't start or send in your story until you have an ending.

don't get me wrong, you have some potential, but this story was almost unreadable. It made no sense.

Make up your mind between the two males! Or is she to be the target of both father and son? You must realise that you are writing to very different audiences if you try to spread the story so wide open as this, and you probably won't please all of us!

Don't pay any attention to the idiots on here. You have a pretty good story going here. Like they have never seen a part "2" or "3" to a story on Literotica. Keep the story going. I liked it.

I read these stories for entertainment,they don't need to make perfect sense,we've all read stories or watched movies that had flaws of one kind or another but we still enjoyed most of them.

dont listen to the jerks..i totally thought it was good..but you should do a ch 2 and maybe try and work on the fact that she wants them both ;)

keep up the good work

I think that this has the makings of being a great story. I agree with others, you should add more to the story. It did seem to stop short. I was thinking mayber her and the dad would hook up, which isn't such a bad route to take. Keep up the good work. Hopefully we'll see more. :)

I'll give you a hundred because I know you are going to give us another chapter about the party and the Dad, and maybe both father and son getting her!! SHe is hot enough, let her take them both on!! And then later another chapter involving her friend on the phone who also wants both the father sand the son!

You did damned good !!!!!! Keep up the good work!!

By the way, I am 61 yrs old and would love to hit a young one like that!

Would love to see what happens next!

... and as an older neighbor of a younger college-bound woman, I would say your fantasy land is a sultry place to visit. Keep sharing your stories. Thank you!!!

The story has some good points and some bad. Please don't dismiss all of the 'negative' feedback as just 'mean.' A story with more than one part or chapter is fine, but a story needs to have a certain coherence of it's own- especially if it isn't clear from the begining that it's a Chapter 1. If you want to improve, listen to the constructive critism as well as the praise. The fact of the matter is- the action of the story is between two people of close age, so the story- at least not this chapter (if that is your plan does not belong in "Mature." I just hope that you take *all* of the comments into consideration. Those of us who would try to help you improve are not mean, we're just trying to help.

Hi ty lass did send u private comment as well.... Please keep on writing and submitting the efforts

HL

A 32 inch waist with 38 inch hips...are you sure this is a GIRL? Did you mean a 23 inch waist. Be more careful and PROOFREAD.

Let’s see… There’s a distinct lack of any kind of plot. If you’re to relegate James to the void, then there was no purpose in introducing him. That leaves it being a mediocre stroke story. Pretty disappointing.

where was the mature part?