Imbalance Pt. 02

When I made it over to the driver side and got in, she lightly touched my hand.

"Um, do you have something for me?" she asked. I knew what she was referring to. I reached into my pocket and pulled out an envelope that had the money in it. Once I handed it to her, it disappeared into her purse.

"It's always best to get that out of the way early. It could ruin the mood later. But don't you worry. You won't be thinking about it soon enough." She purred as she rubbed my arm, causing the hairs on it to stand up.

"You have a nice car. What do you do?" She asked as we pulled out of the parking lot of the club.

"I'm an engineer. I design engines. In fact, I designed the engine for this very model."

She looked impressed. "Wow. No shit?"

"No shit. It goes from 0 to 60 in less time than it takes to crack an egg. I'm actually on the team who is trying to make a new kind of engine." I said proudly. She nodded and smiled.

"You're obviously very good at your job. That's a huge turn on."

I know she meant it as a compliment, but my eyes glossed over when she said that. I was good at my job. The best in fact. But the price I paid to be that wasn't worth it.

"Did I say something wrong?" she asked. I shook it off.

"Nah. Just haunted by ghosts. Ya know?"

"I know the feeling." She said softly. I got the feeling that she was talking more to herself than she was to me. We sat in silence for a few moments.

"You hungry?" I asked, trying to break the tension that settled. She nodded.

"A little. But I'm sure you want to get to the room and get what you paid for. I can wait."

That sat wrong with me. I didn't like the idea of having sex with her and having her hungry while doing it.

"Do you like pancakes?"

"Huh"

"Do you like pancakes? The only places open at this time are IHOP and McDonald's, and I can't eat fake food."

She gave me a little smile to show that my gesture was appreciated.

"I'm good Frank. Thanks for asking. But I'd rather just do what we came to do."

That sounded so cold. Clinical. Do what we came to do? Like this was nothing more than a business transaction. I mean, I guess it was. But she could have left me with the fantasy that this was more.

"Okay." I said, a bit too dejectedly. She caught it, but she didn't say anything else about it.

The rest of the ride was pretty quiet. It wasn't until we got to the room that the first words were uttered.

"So Frankie. What kind of things would you like to do to me?" She purred. Her eyes looked me over seductively, as if they were taking an object of desire. The change was so sudden, yet so seamless. She morphed so effortlessly that it appeared to be natural. But it wasn't.

That's when I got a real look at her. This person, this purring kitten that was all sex and lust, was an act. A beautiful mirage. The flirtatious person that she was when I first met her and when I came back to see her tonight wasn't the real Starlet.

Hell, that wasn't even her real name!

I don't know what came over me, but I wasn't turned on anymore. Her sex appeal was caught up in the fantasy. A fantasy that I now knew was bullshit. I didn't want to have sex with her anymore.

She closed the gap between us and began to rub my arms and back. She lightly kissed my neck as she pressed her body against mine. I could feel the softness of her breasts fitting to my chest.

"Starlet..." I tried to say. She continued to kiss me.

"Do you like that baby?" she cooed as she her hands snaked its way between us. She rubbed my dick through my pants as she tried to coax it into a full blown erection. She didn't have much work to do.

However, as much as my body wanted her, my mind wasn't on the same page. For me, both were needed. I know that many guys would snatch my man card and rip it up over this, but with the realization that I now faced about her, I couldn't do it.

"Starlet." I said with more assertiveness as I lightly pushed her off. She looked confused as I walked to the other side of the room rubbed my head in frustration.

"Okay Frank. What do you want? I thought I had you figured out, but apparently not. Tell me what you're looking for." I noticed the hint of exasperation in her voice. But she recovered quickly. "Tell momma what she can do for you Frankie?"

She was good. She had this seductress personality down cold. She was able to switch it on and off at will. But I saw through that.

"I want to get something to eat. I'm hungry. What about you? You hungry?" I said as I reached for the phone to call room service. Her face became annoyed. But once again, it was gone in a flash, and the kitten was back.

"I'd rather have you eat me. Or have you feed me that large piece of meat that you're hiding in your pants." She said as strolled over to me and tried to wrap herself around me again. I sidestepped her.

She stood there confused. Then the irritation bubbled to the surface.

"What the fuck did you bring me here for Frank? Huh? Are you gonna fuck me, or are you here to play games? I had a long night of dancing, and I could be at home sleeping. But I came her with you. To fuck you. Now, tell me what it is that you want so I can make you bust a nut and get home."

There she was. The real Starlet. Or whatever her name was.

"I wanna talk." I said honestly. She looked at me skeptically for a moment. Then she shook her head and laughed. When she was done laughing, she looked at me with irritation again.

"Take me back to the club." She said curtly.

"What?"

"I said, TAKE ME BACK TO THE GODDAMN CLUB! That's where my car is parked. Tonight is over. I am not the girl you want, and I'm not gonna waste either of our time."

"Are you kidding? How would you know what I want?"

She laughed at me again. "Please! You think you're different than the hundreds of other guys that I see? What, did you think that because you opened the door for me and asked me if I was hungry that I would suddenly become overwhelmed with love? This isn't some fucking fairy tale! It was supposed to be a porno."

"That's not what I was trying to do."

"Frank, stop kidding yourself. What you want is a Girl Friend Experience. You want to dine me, talk and laugh with me, and then fuck me, like we're in a real relationship. Like I'm your girlfriend. And then you go home, back to your wife, and you become the husband that she needs."

At the mention of my wife, tears came down. I tried to stop them, but they wouldn't stop. They kept coming.

"Frank?"

I tried to talk, but I couldn't. The torrent of tears kept coming. Starlet looked at me perplexed for a moment, and then her face went sad.

"Your wife. She left you, didn't she?"

At that I broke. I sobbed. I'm not talking about a manly sort of crying where you let a few tears fall. I'm talking about all out bawling.

"I just got the papers today." I was able to say. And then I fell to my knees.

I thought I was done crying over this. I thought I was past this. But I wasn't. And now, I was in a room with a smoking hot woman, and all I could do was cry over THAT bitch.

Starlet blew out an exasperated breath as she put her hands on her hips. She honestly didn't know what to do. Slowly, she crossed the room and stood over me. Then she pressed my head into her stomach. I wrapped my arms around her waist and let the tears fall.

We stayed like that for about 10 minutes. When the flood subsided, I looked up into her eyes. They were full of sympathy.

"I'm sorry. I guess I ruined the mood." I said with a self-deprecating laugh.

"Pretty much." She returned, but there was a hint of playfulness in her voice. Then her face got serious. "Look Frank, I'm sorry about your marriage. I really am. But what you want from me tonight isn't something that I can give you. I can fuck the shit out of you and leaving you limping home. But I can't pretend to be your girlfriend. I'm not built that way. I'm sorry."

I nodded as I stood up. "I get it Starlet. I do."

She nodded and kissed me on the cheek. Then she grabbed her purse, reached inside of it, and grabbed the envelope with money out.

"Here's your money Frank." She said as she tried to hand it to me. I pushed it back at her.

"You keep it Starlet."

"But we didn't have sex."

I looked at her, and I realized that for the first time in a while, I felt a sort of release. It's not the manliest thing to admit, but maybe I just needed a good cry. To get that bile out of me. Having a woman to hug me as I did so may have been exactly what I needed.

"You helped me tonight Starlet. Whether you realize it or not, you did. We didn't have sex, but I consider this money well spent. So you keep it. You earned it."

She nodded and put it back in her purse. We left the room and headed to my car so that I could take her back to the club. We sat in silence for a while. It wasn't awkward, like two people desperately thinking of something to say. It was more comfortable. Neither of us had to speak. We didn't really have anything say, but it was okay.

"You know what Frank? I am hungry. What do you say we go out to IHOP after all?" She broke the silence with. I glanced at her to find her looking back at me.

"Sure. I could go for some unlimited pancakes." I joked. She smiled and nodded.

"Me too."

As we took our detour, I turned to her. "Hey Starlet. If you don't want to answer this, I understand. But, I have to ask. What's your real name?"

She took a breath and thought for a minute. Then she looked at me with those piercing eyes. "Cassandra. You can call me Sandra."

I smiled at her and nodded. "Nice to meet you Sandra."

Her look turned into a smirk. "Ah, yes. Nice to meet me. Cuz I just told you my real name and it's like you're meeting me for the first time. Clever." She said sarcastically.

"I thought so."

"That's because you're corny." She threw back at me. She laughed as she looked away and shook her head. However, when I got a look at the reflection of her face in the passenger side window, I saw her smiling.

Sandra. It really was nice to meet her.

Cameo Characters:

Terrence "Terry" Ross from "Selfish Spouse"

Cassandra/Sandra "Starlet" from "Struggling to Survive"

Brief mention of Sasha Stars from "The Real Girl"