All Comments on 'Ingrams & Assoc 1: Double Bluff Ch. 04'

And interesting that Jace did some IT security for Jessica. Liked the satire in that he put false reports on the phony computer using Lit stories. But in the other story, "Out of Love," Jace was pretty pissed off at Jessica. Who could imagine she would ask him for IT help let alone that he would provide it? Guess money can buy almost anything.

The warning flyer under April's windshield wiper is a nice dramatic touch but would never happen. No one and no organization would warn someone except on a TV thriller. The element of surprise is somewhat lost in such cases.

Of course, the author did this to create suspense and insure we would want to learn more in a future story. April needs to know more about the ominous "gentlemen's club." So there will be an element of danger for her, which adds to the excitement.

My instinct re: a club like that is to send in a SWAT team. Sex should be consensual. Obviously, in real life, it is not always so, but at least in America, truly non-consent sex is illegal, and is termed "sexual assault," or "rape."

So a club as described, money or no, needs to be brought down and its members introduced into the "club" where non-consent is the true lifestyle -- i.e., The Joint, as in Leavenworth, et al. Thanks for writing.

I'm looking forward to April's next adventure. I read this looking to be entertained and I definitely was. I understand that jezzaz used a lot of literary license to get the story across and that not all events are credible or even possible. Too many "facts" and too much detail sometimes cause a story to bog down and I lose interest. So for me the writing style found that "Goldilocks" sweet spot, not too much and not too little; it is just right. Five *s from me!

Didnt connect emotionally in a way for me to rate a 5, but certainly a 4+ for the origniality of the story, the detail, insight into the types of covert opps that might exist. Keep up the good work.

A great deal of intrigue. One of the gifts I think you have is where to end chapters. With you it's not simply a long story that gets chopped up and submitted in chunks, rather, it's a clear stopping point (nearly cliff hanger at times) with a clear beginning for the next chapter that relates clearly to the story but is not a mere continual flow of ideas. I'm not sure why the gentlemen's club is truly necessary unless you are creating an antagonist that will be the ever present villain to April and I&A. I don't think you need that but we will see how it goes. Quite the task in submitting a story that demands sequels and I hope you're up to it.

Wonderful and elaborate tale! I (kinda) liked the DNA problem, and didn't see the answer provided coming ... for a reason! Later!

A full Pentium score! Unfortunate number of typos ... many that a simple spell-check would fix within milliseconds! This is a common (and unfortunate) Jezzaz problem!

More substantive quibble (but not a score-dropper!) Once a child DNA issue was identified, the original (not Hubby's kids) would also show they were half-sibs through Sweetie! The NEXT set (ARE Hubby's kids) would also show they are half-sibs (Hubby and different Moms!). This assumes that there were several different sperm donors within the first set, and different 'pissed off wives' within the second set!

First, under what warped logic does this belong in 'loving wives'? Second, the reader would like to have someone to identify with or cheer for. There is no likeable character in this. Third, the premise is utterly improbable. Suspending disbelief can only go so far. This story has absolutely no association with the prequel.

There are six planned stories in the Ingrams Series, all plotted out. Obviously this one is done, there is another already completed (but won't be released for a while - it just needed to be written when the idea was fleshed out.), and I'm hard at work on the second story as we speak.

Yes, Storm Clouds is put in place for the future. It maybe a while before I resolve that though, so don't hold your breath :)

To commentators who say there are no sympathetic characters - well, yeah. Part of the point is to make the point that people who would this kind of thing - and it's _extremely_ morally reprehensible - are socially maladjusted, even when they look like they aren't.

The whole conceit is really just an exercise in What If for the sake of it, not because there's any reality to any of it:)

There aren't super villains with lairs in volcanoes either, but we all still enjoy a good bond flick.

As for why it's in Loving Wives - two reasons. 1) Loving Wives gets the most views and 2) the story _is_ actually about a marriage. All of the Ingrams stories are. There's just intrigue that goes with it.

I went back and read the first chapters. This story is not a "Loving Wives" story by any stretch of the imagination. This website doesn't try to control category placement, at least, not in Loving Wives, but it should. Placing it here because Loving Wives gets more reads is like a beggar standing at the busiest street corner.

The author needs to spend some time deciding what is pertinent to the story and what is not. There are tons of unnecessary details. Fiction has to be believable, and I'm not sure that is possible with the organizations used and the action of the story. Walmart for clothes and then a top-of-the-line restaurant feels very inconsistent. If there was some reason for this specifically, it was not explained in the story. "Bit her lip" should be a specific gesture for one character.

Mostly, I think the author need to tighten up on what is necessary and what is not. The flow is good.

Worked at Langley for 2 yrs in an overt capacity. Your remarkably spot on in some pro-cedural systems protocol. Watch your back

I am surprised at only nine comments. This is a clever, interesting, well written and erotic story. As to the characters - I like April. Didn't care for the negotiator or his wife as people, but they were interesting. Five stars for sure; well done!

A bit unbelievable and a lot of unpleasant characters! Still the storyline held my attention even though it lost the fizz near the end...

I was correct. You left a hell of a lot of plot threads hanging out there.

God , what a drivel. "1*" !

Congrats on a very good, intelligent story. Definitely 4 stars out of 5. I like the way other characters from the Jezzaz Universe peek in. I read Out of Love before I read this and I was glad because Out of Love is better not knowing about Ingrams and Associates. Overall I still prefer Out of Love, Live from the Game and Metamorph to this series because they seem more powerful emotionally. Having said that I will keep reading.

Yes I liked the concept but found it to be heavy going. I will re-read and fully digest this before going on to the next part. Meanwhile 5***** effort and intriguing concept.

Enjoyed the story. Well done!

Since this is fiction, it was easy to overlook a glaring issue: Ingrams is trying to put broken things back together, but in reality, nobody fixes a broken relationship between two people by having sex with one or the other. Unless "fixing it" means divorce.

Interesting story, maybe a little too trite with the ending. Guess Faires left the note. We need a little conflict.

I thought it a very unusual and novel approach to storytelling and as far as I can tell this category covers a whole range of stories so not a problem for me. The sex may be a different matter but I'm not going to argue the point either way - it's there.

Found it very enjoyable and worthy if 5 stars

Clutching at straws towards the end. I think you had backed yourself into a metaphorical corner and found it difficult to free yourself. My overriding feeling was one of disinterest. I did not like any of the characters and it all seemed somewhat contrived and unpleasant.

Wow a story with an end... well except for the note.

This was incredibly inane to the point of utter stupidity. The whole premise is absurd, and the DNA testing would have immediately revealed that the wife was not the mother of the kids, as her DNA was tested at the same time.

A very clever and enjoyable storey. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Danm this writer, it’s good

You twisted all that around into one hell of a story!!! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Excellent work, really engaging.

Simon_Masters

Wild and crazy. Excellent. Thanks.