All Comments on 'Instance Ch. 01'

not a bad story, i hope to get to read more soon.

Ooh! I very much like this opening chapter. Action, mystery, characters who are real human beings. More please, thank you!

Strong opening; tone and atmosphere set up with economy and confidence; not a word wasted helping us get to know our characters quickly without expositing a damned thing, and as D&T says, characters that come across as real people. Nice work. I've read many published novels that begin like this, and I always continue. :)

I was impressed with your particularly dark "For Destruction, Ice" story back in September--frightening yet still accessible to me. I haven't run across someone write a piece like that for several years and make it so tense, and it's been a while since I went that far myself. So I already know you have experience playing with tension for a premise/tone like this, and I know you've got guts to do what's needed, when it's needed for the story, even if this novel may never need to get that dark.

So, Mr. Clearwater, looking forward to more. :)

Very much appreciated.

I've never tried to write a novel in series, without the ability to go back and fill in plot holes, so writing this will be slower going than my usual episodic smut. For longer work, I'm traditionally a serial multi-draft editor. Planning ahead will be a challenge.

Etaski, thanks also for the feedback on For Destruction, Ice. I know it's dark, I know it's disturbing, but I felt it was one of my better efforts craft-wise.

This one will have its darker moments, but I'll never go as dark as Peter Hamilton does in Reality Dysfunction. I'm not a complete monster. :-P

I gave you five stars because the story has promise. It needed a little more exposition on them staying together for the night. Descriptions of her home and the state of it after being searched , also her feelings about having this strange but comforting man in her home.

Hi Sithon, thanks for the feedback. Good points.

Looking forward to seeing more

Maybe there is a clinic for my addiction to your stories. I try to avoid the unfinished stories as I get impatient for more and then impatient for you to complete my more favourite ones rather than the one you do at the time. I don't know how you manage to spin so many characters and storylines at the same time but hey, I'm grateful that you do

So it was great reluctance that I started this as I know it is incomplete and I wanted to save it for reading in one go. But like all addicts I'd rather have a little bit than none. I'm intrigued by the mystery of the portal, I like the developing characters, and I wouldn't mind meeting Ian. It's a rare day off for me and I'm looking forward to chapter two, then I'll wait!