All Comments on 'Island Girls Ch. 01'

I enjoyed the first chapter. These four people are not completely fleshed out as to why they have launched themselves into the abyss but there is time. Your married couple needs to be explained. Reguardless of the sex of a couple who've been together exclusive for ten years they need a reason to step away from manogomy.

Good luck with the fuck. lol I'll be watching you build the story. Put a bush on someone. All that everybody is shaving it down rationale is not so prevelant as porn directors might have us think.

Thanks for your comments -- your criticisms are all well taken. This story started out as a mindless little stroker just to see if I could pull it off (no pun intended). I can't. Now I'm finding myself scrambling to find a natural way to address the questions and concerns you raise. It may take a while, but by the time this gets much further than the four chapters pending moderation, everything you mention will be addressed.

For me the question has been answered -- I can't write strokers. A much better example of what I enjoy writing can be found on my website: http://www.asstr.org/~Letoria/Index.html

That was a great opener

Is full of possibilities, from passion to pain and loss, or acceptance that life is far to short not to live it to the full.