Jeurridam Ch. 05: A Fool's Paradise

We stood in our usual spot, watching for any passers by.

"I can't believe how crazy the other night was..." Luke smiled.

"You alright?" I asked, this being the first time seeing each other in two days.

"I had to clean up yesterday after the crazy night before. I was out for the count! Connor's... starting to grow suspicious of how I'm making this type of money. He's been asking a lot of questions. I don't want him to find out about us." Luke responded.

"This is perfect leverage! You're the only one raking in these types of profits right?" I asked.

"Yeah. I in one night, I bring in what everyone brings in together." Connor said.

"Sounds like the perfect way to get inside his head. If you want him to back off, make him feel that he needs you! Make him feel that you're more valuable than he previously thought. Get inside his head the same way you get inside the heads of your clients! It won't be too hard considering he's just a boy like us. It'll throw him off your tail for bit." I said.

"How do you know so much?" Connor asked, amazed.

"You learn fast in this industry. Everyone tries to get over on you but you have to know how to dance around them. Dancing around situations is all I know how to do." I laughed.

"How long have you been doing this?" He asked.

"You don't wanna know... Just know I'm a veteran at this point." I said.

"Well, well, well..." A familiar voice said out. I turned, knowing exactly who it was.

"Rion..." I said.

"Long time no see!" Rion smiled, "How've you been?"

I looked to Luke, glaring at him.

"Run!" I mouthed. He picked up on it, this being something we rehearsed nights before. He stayed put for now, just remaining silent.

"I've been good..." I said, turning to face Rion. I placed my hand on the wall, putting myself between Luke and Rion as discretely as possible. Rion was met with a warm, 'inquisitive' smile.

"So what happened? You just vanished a month and a half ago..." Rion said, prodding hard. He knew he was why I left Paradise.

"It is complicated... Had some issues to address back at A99." I laughed.

Luke paced around a distance away, standing on the sidewalk. He eventually crossed the street, dodging Rion's note. I held in my sigh, knowing this wasn't over with.

"So why are you back here?" Rion asked.

"I um," I said trying to think fast, "I told you I'm on my own. I mean for good this time..." He looked at me intently, trying to figure me out, those warm portals for eyes making me sweat.

"Well come on down to East Paradise. Let's chill..." He smiled.

"I'm good bro." I grinned. His intense gaze went to a whole other level.

"What's the matter? Come on!" He persisted.

"Ok..." I said giving in, thinking about Luke. Rion smiled, the sleazy grin on his face telling it all. He felt his claws were still deep in me but he was in for a surprise. He took my hand, leading me back east.

"So..." He said, "I take it that you've been escorting? Nice tights!"

"Yeah... I've been having to keep some food on my belly." I said, maintaining the air. He looked at me from the corner of his eye, detailing every inch of me. He knew something had changed.

"You look nice. You've been making some good money?" He asked.

"I've been scrounging. In central Paradise it's pretty cutthroat... escorts everywhere but I'm managing." I said. He looked at me with those prodding eyes. He wasn't satisfied at all with that answer but he hid it well.

"We've been running a little short the past few weeks." He said, hinting at his intentions.

"Awe... well you know how this place has some good night and bad nights..." I smiled.

"Yeah..." He said, steadily eying me, taking off his jacket, "I know you're cold..." He handed it to me. Not wanting to refuse him, I took it, putting it on.

Rion was a guy of about five foot ten. He had gorgeous honey skin with brown wavy hair. His eyes were the typical amber of the Sonoran-Mojave locals. He was well built, quite an attractive dude with one of those faces that melted panties. I think it was those lips and that brow. The lips were plump and feisty while the brow was stern and falconine.

I used to have such a big crush on him when we first met. It probably was how he got into my head so easily but we were not sixteen year olds any more. Those days of being easily manipulated were long gone! After all, he was my teacher and I knew his every move.

We arrived at the Da Lagon Casino in East Paradise. There were a lot familiar faces, some surprised to see me alive and kicking. The further we went into the packed building, the more my stomach churned. That meant it'd be hard to get out of here.

We eventually made it to the penthouse several storeys up. It was as lavish as any hotel, a penthouse I was very familiar with. Whores and drug lords were everywhere, the smell of burning cocaine and marijuana clogging my sinuses. I had been clean for a month now and I planned on staying that way. Rion grabbed my hand, leading me to a room in the rear, full of sectionals. It also was full of whores, their bosses, drugs and petty cash laying around. All I could do was shake my head.

Rion sat on a sectional overlooking Jeurridam. He popped open a box full of straight cubans, lighting one. Looking back, he was unsure why I was still standing.

"Sit..." He said. I did so, picking the tiniest corner of the section to rest my quarters. He looked on in disbelief, having to pause but saying nothing.

"I missed you man..." He said, "A month without your crazy ass just ain't a month." I said nothing, knowing he only missed me for the money I brought in, "Did you miss me?"

"Sure..." I sighed. He leaned across the sectional grabbing my face.

"Don't say it like that!" He laughed. I smiled. It gave him the invite to inch his way closer to me. He planted his lips on mine giving me a less than moving kiss. It felt so wrong to be doing this but there was no backing out. He could feel the rift between us, withdrawing. He looked at me concerned.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"Nothing." I smiled.

"I know, you Zeek! I know when something's wrong." He said, climbing off of me, "What happened when you went home last?"

"I stole something from a family member to get some drug money but it didn't go over smoothly. I ended up getting cleaned up but things weren't the same and I got put out about a week and a half ago, this time for good..." I said. He looked at me, extremely upset.

"You got cleaned up?" He asked. It took me a while to build the courage to respond.

"Yeah."

"So you've been without it for damn near three months, now?" Rion asked, truly surprised.

"Yeah."

"Well," He said, getting to his feet, "Let's get you a little fix for the torture!"

"NO!" I shouted. Everyone paused, looking at me.

"No?" Rion, responded, shocked by my refusal.

"I've been clean for this long... I don't want to go back to being the way I was, not being able to do anything for myself. You don't know what it's like to be puddy to that need to hit. You don't know what it's like going through withdrawal... You don't know the shit I had to go through, the shit I had to fuck up just to... get some. I don't want to go back to that," I said, "And I'm not..."

Rion stood there, deep in thought. He didn't know what to do, me being the first of his whores to 'break free'. He could see his control over my life, run through his fingers like sifting sand. There was no emotional connection between us, only the physical dependency that plagued me for so long. This just wouldn't fly with him. The only thing holding him back from killing me right now was my name... I was a Logatti, the most powerful family in the Sonoran and one of the most powerful in the Mojave. He knew if a hair on my hair got split, despite my father banishing me, a war would ensue. A war with the Logatti is the last thing any clan wanted, especially Da Lagon.

The longer he stood, the angrier he became. It didn't take long for him to come rushing back over to me.

"Look, you little bitch. You're mine..." He said, interrupted by the cocking of my revolver.

"I have nothing to lose, Rion." I said, not wanting to do this at all, "I have no family any more. I have nothing of my own. I just have my free will and I'll be damned if you take that from me again. I'm not afraid to die... I know for a fact I can kill you, that fat ass over there reaching for his gun, and a few others before they gun me down. But are you afraid to die? Don't you love how easy you have it here? You're twenty three years old with a whole life ahead of you! Do you really wanna go like this because some crazy fool who was tired of being kept down bucked up? Do you really wanna die right now because I got a bullet for your brains..."

Everyone watched in terror, this being the first time this has happened in a long while.

"Ezekiel..." Rion said, beginning to plead.

"You all won't take me alive! I'll fight till I'm holed up with bullets! I'd want you all to kill me! I'd want word to get out so my dad can grieve! You know how he grieves?" I asked, "He crushes what ever makes him grieves... Da Lagon... It ain't nothing to crush... Do me this favor... please! I'd love to watch you ALL burn from my cozy little cinder in hell..."

"Leave..." Rion said, "And if I or any of my goons catch you in Paradise again, I'll kill you!"

"Kill me? You better expect to die in return..." I fired back.

I was gone, not looking back once as I fled the casino. It was over with, the escorting was done. This would be the last time Luke and I saw each other... I had to find him before I left. Running back to his usual spot, he wasn't there. I searched our usual perches, still nowhere to be found. I eventually found him in Southern Paradise, escorting a group of foreign men who for sure had some fat pockets. By now, it was well past midnight. I caught up with him, falling in line with his pattern. He was glad to see me but kept on with the tour.

We took the men by the Lion of Judah where they marveled at the mass of gold. It was a brief moment alone with Luke.

"What happened?" He asked.

"I fucked up bad..." I said, "I can't come back to Paradise, but..."

"No, why???" He asked, interrupting me.

"I've given you mostly everything you need to tough it out here..." I said, reaching inside the rear of my tights, "Except this," I handed him the revolver, "I got it today at the Smith's, especially for you! It's small and discreet and will save your life one day."

"No, Zeek," He said as I tried to pull away, "Where are you gonna..."

"I'm gonna have to pick a new job sooner than I thought, I guess. I'll be back and forth between Henderson, Boulder City and the A99. If you ever need me, I'll be in one of the other, no promises. Just stay safe, Luke..." I said, trying to pull away.

He wouldn't let me go, pulling me in closer and closer. He brought his lips forth, kissing me goodbye. It was a kiss I wasn't expecting, one I felt deep down. He let me go, trying to hold back tears.

"Bye." He said.

"Bye." I said back, not even able to look at him. I felt my heart belonged to Zanir but Luke managed to wedge his way into my it faster than anyone else could. I guess it was because I saw myself in him. He was me at eighteen, timid but held back by those who wanted to use him. One day he'd learn just how powerful he really was. It'd hit him overnight, the way it did me.

Making my way back to Dredge Valley, I packed up my things and headed to Henderson. It was in the dead of the night, the ride feeling longer than ever. Upon arrival, vehicles were parked at the petrol station, many people camping it out there. Families from far and wide who came to buy much needed supplies sat out with tents and fires burning, laughing and having themselves a good time. I don't remember when the last time my family just had a good time for the sake of having a good time. It brought back that void in my chest, that emptiness that longed to be filled. Not having any of it, I picked up the 'Machiavelli' book and began reading.

The book lasted me all night. As the morning came, it was time to do something remotely productive. I scoured the town, looking for anything to occupy myself. A part from dust-side games of dice and holograms, nothing stuck out. I entered store after store, buying books where I could find them. It seriously was becoming an addiction, now. But reading couldn't hurt right?

Continuing to explore Henderson made me feel bad for anyone who lived here. Around every road was a family owned petrol station with grand lots for families to camp. The petrol stations had restaurants, clothing stores, novelty stores, anything to give one the leg up over the next station and to keep the travelers from having to go to Paradise...

The exploration eventually ended up south, where I came across a job bulletin. Out of curiosity I began reading. Most of the jobs were security jobs, some hired mercenary jobs for cartel runners and many other things I've tried in an effort to make cash. Then came the mission clerk jobs, market inventory jobs, and judicial advisor jobs, all requiring literate people. These jobs paid well more than any job that required physical labor and it'd be easy to work my way up the ladder to a more promising position. Just to think that a month ago, I couldn't read. Now that I was literate, the sky was the limit. Opportunities that never reared their head began to do so.

"Look..." The youthful voice of a child said.

"Oh my god." His mother said as the sound of air being warped caught my attention.

Turning, a large red mech came flying high over the Sloan quarantine zone.

"It's coming towards us!" The mother said, rushing her child away. Everyone scattered, mechs being feared like no other machine. The man landed near a large metal door jutting from the ground. The machine waited, and waited it confusing everyone who stayed to watch. It looked familiar, like the giant mech that Zanir escaped A99 with but was much slimmer. That mech had no wings, and was far more heavily armored.

Suddenly, the large metal door began to open. Two analog buggies drove out. I recognized the design... They were Mojave blueprint buggies from The City of Rust. These were Merchant Clan members! Looking in the buggies, I was shocked... Not only was Zanir in one, but Beth and Heaven were too. They were with, of all people, Galveston... My stomach churned.

But now, I knew where Zanir was, where my sister and my brother was! A chilly feeling ran down my spine as the thoughts of what could be going on amongst them ran through my mind. Following the two buggies was an Orb, the one with the laser sights. The buggies, Orb and giant Mech disappeared west, heading back to The City of Rust...

*****

A very fun chapter to write. Chapter six is on its way.

Please comment!! I love comments!! There's no such thing as a bad comment and I encourage them all. I want feed back, from your thoughts on character to where you think the story is headed to points where you think I could improve.

*sorry about the chapter confusion*

Chapter 1. The Arizona Paradise

Chapter 2. The City of Rust

Chapter 3. The Outskirts

Chapter 4. Sloan

Chapter 5. A Fool's Paradize