All Comments on 'Jim and Bea'

This story could have been very erotic, but unfortunately you did not seem to have the ability to give it what it needed. There was very little erotic "coupling".

Just a slut wife and a cheating neighbor, oh, she loves her husband to bits, hope he comes home early and they can show him how much she loves him, just before he kicks their ass.

Geez, soon when does the husband find out he is a wimp?

I liked the way you wrote through the voice of both people.

It turned me on, but was over to quick. How about a second part!

Thanks for feedback to what is my first posting on Literotica, and I obviously have a lot to learn. Watch out for "Plymouth" and "Sahara" later in the year in which I hope to have improved a bit. Except for the 'slut wife' readership, of course, who will no doubt be incandescent!

for a first it wasn't bad at all. You certainly chose an unusuall (and difficult) technique for telling the story. I believe it would have helped for such a short story to dedicate longer chunks of narrative, making it less "jumpy".

As far as closing the door on us just as the couple enters the bedroom, I thought this period has ended (especially in this kind of site) has ended sometime at the end of the fifties...

Not sure I really liked the style, but the story was good.