Just Drive

Realizing what a complete mess I was in, feeling jealous over a guy I'd never even slept with, I ordered a round of shots for Clark and I and then, with enough liquid courage in me to muster up the words, I asked Clark to take me back to his place.

******

The force of it all hit me when I woke up the next morning, for the second time; thankfully back in my own bed. The first time, I'd woken up in Clark's bed and snuck out without waking him. I wish I could say that sex with Clark had been amazing, so at least I could feel like I'd released a bunch of tension or whatever, but truthfully I was too drunk to remember anything past making out in his living room.

"Holy fuck, I have a thing for Jay and I just had a one night stand with a total random from a bar." It was all just too much and I buried my head underneath my pillow and let out a giant scream.

I knew that Channing would actually be super proud about me going home with Clark. She was always insisting that I needed to loosen up and act my age, but at the moment all I could think of was Jay's fingers threading through Channing's beautiful blond hair, his face bouncing between her gigantic tits motorboating her as he'd undoubtedly always longed to do and his lips latching on to her nipples, his tongue flicking over them as she moaned and encouraged him on.

It was pathetic that I'd just had sex and I could only visualize what my two best friends had been up to instead of reliving highlights of my own night.

A text chimed in on my phone.

"Hey, did you make it home ok, last night?" - Channing

I knew I would tell her the whole story, including the embarrassing realization that she (and my parents) had been right about Jay all along, but in the moment I just threw my phone across the bed.

Why? Seriously, what sane person realizes that they have feelings for someone and instead of telling them goes off and has sex with someone else? And worse, Jay has had a thing for Channing for years. Either she is going to break his heart by telling him it was just a one-time thing or worse, they're going to get married and live happily ever after! FUCK!!

My phone chirped again and I begged it not to be Jay. I wasn't sure if I'd ever be able to face him, let alone the morning after he'd finally fucked Channing.

When I still didn't respond to the messages, my phone rang. I reached across to where I'd thrown it and answered grumpily.

"What?" I inquired, not bothering to look at caller i.d. It was going to suck to talk to either one of them.

"Oh, hey, ummm, Tatum. It's Clark. You, uh, left your sunglasses here."

I hadn't been wearing sunglasses, certainly not out to drinks with my friends at night. Clearly, Clark was fishing for a reason to call me. Maybe I was a wild sex goddess and he just couldn't wait to get me back into his bed. Too bad I didn't remember.

"Oh, hey. Sorry... about sneaking out in the middle of the night. That's kind of a douche move, but you were asleep and I felt... awkward."

"Well, you had a lot to drink, you know. You were so pretty and I just let you call the shots, but I'm guessing you don't drink much... Kind of a lightweight. Anyway," he said, noticing that he was rambling, "It's just a shame I had to put you to bed before I could even see you naked."

"Wait, what?" I know that the calm, classy thing would have been to pretend I'd always known that information, but I've just never been very smooth, or tactful or... well, you get the picture.

"Yeah, we just slept in my bed. You were way too drunk. Call me old fashioned, but I prefer my partners be conscious."

If I'd been on my game, I probably would have made some quip about being sure that he at least snuck a peek while putting me to bed, something flirty, something funny, something that proved I had two brain cells to rub together. Instead I laughed and said, "Oh thank God."

There was an uncomfortable pause on the other end of the line, and I realized that I had unintentionally just insulted Clark.

"Oh, God, Clark. I'm sorry. I didn't mean, 'oh thank God I didn't have sex with you' because I wasn't into you or anything. I meant, 'oh thank God' I didn't do things that I didn't even remember and 'oh thank God' I didn't cheat on Jay." I shut up, realizing I was rambling now and worse yet, not making any damn sense.

"Jay? I thought you said you were single?" Clark's tone sounded stung, even though he barely knew me. He must have really been into me, as this was an awful lot of follow-up for a one-night stand, that wasn't.

"Oh, God, now I'm not even making sense. I don't have a boyfriend. I just realized that I have feelings for someone that I didn't think I did and then I went home with you. Oh Jesus, I'm shutting up now. Clark, thank you for being such a good guy last night. You're really cute and funny and I hope you meet someone great, but clearly, I'm a head case. This is a get out of jail free card, I highly recommend running for the hills."

To his credit, Clark laughed, "All right crazy hot girl. You're right, you're sounding a bit nuts but you're also really cute and sweet. By any chance is Jay the guy you were having drinks with when I saw you at the bar?"

"Um, yeah... why?"

"Cause he was glaring at me all night. I think the feeling might be mutual. Mozel Tov!" he joked before finding a classy way off of the phone.

Wait, Jay was throwing dirty looks at Clark? Why wasn't he too busy learning from Channing or staring at her boobs or whatever?

I checked the messages on my phone. Sure enough, the earlier one had been Jay.

"Hey, M. Need to talk. You up yet?"

My stomach dropped. We needed to talk? Shit. Fuck. Piss. God Damn it. He'd finally fucked Channing and was calling to tell me... what? How great it was? How he wished he'd been hooking up with her after high school? How great it felt to rub his cock between her giant tits?

Clearly, my thoughts were getting the best of me. I texted back that yes, I was awake and thinking it was past time for coffee. I offered to meet him at a coffee house we sometimes went to that was halfway between our apartments, in about an hour so I'd have time to shower.

I did my best to look cute, but not like I was trying too hard. If Jay was planning to tell me all about how in love he was with Channing, I wanted to look hot enough to pull off a, "So? I'm super hot and clearly don't care that you didn't pick me", sort of vibe.

He, on the other hand, looked adorably rumpled, like he'd pretty much rolled out of bed, thrown on a sweatshirt and jeans and strolled into Holy Grounds with mere seconds to spare. I found myself searching his face for signs of how he'd spent his night. Were his lips swollen? Any hickeys? Wait, Channing wouldn't really be that tacky would she?

We grabbed coffee and took up residence in a couple of comfy chairs in the corner. We weren't particularly close to each other, but it did leave me with a good view. Besides, distance might not be a bad thing if he was here to unknowingly break my heart.

"Thanks for meeting up with me. I wasn't sure... well, I wasn't sure where your night would take you. You and that guy seemed to be hitting it off pretty well."

I cringed thinking of just how well it had and hadn't gone. It wasn't one of my finer moments.

"Yeah, well I'm guessing your night was better." I answered shortly, I was just anxious to get whatever this was over with.

"What's that supposed to mean? Channing suggested we bail on the bar so you'd have a chance to hook up with that guy if you wanted. We went back to her place and had a few beers and ended up facebook stalking that douche Eli from high school. Apparently he has three kids now. She also forced me to watch Magic Mike. I swear, that girl is a sadist."

Wait... what? She was taking him home to teach him things and instead they ended up checking in on people from high school and watching Channing Tatum movies. Even though I was super excited that I hadn't lost him to Channing it sounded drastically anticlimactic.

"She has made me watch Magic Mike about 100 times. And did you say three kids? All from the same mom? Some poor girl has put up with him that long?" I asked.

"Hey, once upon a time you wanted to put up with him. You seriously had terrible taste in high school."

"Um, as I remember, I ended high school getting naked with you," I bantered, figuring it couldn't hurt to remind him that he'd once enjoyed getting me naked.

"And yet you never had sex with me," he laughed, "Like I said. Terrible taste."

I raised an eyebrow at him, a gesture that felt achingly familiar as I thought back to nearly 5 years before on that picnic table in the park.

"Ok, captain humility. You drug me out of bed on a Saturday morning to talk. Somehow, I'm guessing it's not to chat about how dumb I was in high school."

"So you admit it then?"

I knew this was my opening. I could pour it on thick, tell him that no one I'd been with had anything on him in the cock department and that I hoped I hadn't missed my chance, but suddenly I felt shy again. What on earth was it about Jay that always caused me to pull back?

"I admit to nothing, Haggerty," I deflected, falling back into our old pattern.

"Ok then, Wu," he said emphasizing my last name, "I'll admit something. I never had a thing for Channing."

"Sure you did. We spent hours talking about ways you could get into her good graces, if not exactly her pants. I remember... I was there," I argued.

"Yeah... I wanted to spend time with you and you were so crazy fixated on thinking that everyone wanted Channing. It was an easy in, certainly easier than admitting that all I could ever think about was kissing you. Besides, you were pretty skittish back then. I'm pretty sure a full out declaration would have sent you running."

"Did you just call me skittish? Like a horse? Seriously?!?"

"Oh babe, I had to break you in. Trust me... the analogy stands."

I glared at Jay, if only because he was right. My gaze softened as I took him in, I mean really took him in. I knew that he'd filled out a little in college, experimented with a little facial hair and thankfully decided to outgrow that phase when we'd moved up north. I knew that he was a little gun shy after Jenna, but for the most part he looked like my Jay, only hotter and with slightly longer hair.

My Jay. The internal phrase wasn't lost on me. I knew that we were circling around something here and was suddenly impatient to get to the point.

"So you weren't into Channing... You were in to me. Past tense?"

"Past. Present. Babe, I don't know why I ever agreed with you that we shouldn't be a couple in LA. It was the worst idea I'd ever heard, but I was afraid you were going to do it anyway and then I'd just be the hurt loser who couldn't keep up with you. The smartest thing I have ever done, in my entire life, was kiss you on that picnic bench."

"So do it again." I smiled.

"We're not on a picnic bench," he countered, though he was already leaning towards me.

"Not in a public park." I whispered, ignoring the inaccuracy of the location for the symmetry to that night. His eyes flashed a question at me and with a devilish grin I stood up and motioned for him to follow me, leading him into the restroom and locking the door.

"Ever had sex in public, Jay?"

"Yeah. Right. No. Not that I'd mind," he smiled.

"Me either."

"We could help each other with that, you know."

And just like that, the need for words was done. I slid my hands underneath his sweatshirt, feeling his filled out chest and his quickening heartbeat. Whether it was the thrill of being with me or being in public or a combination of the two, I didn't know, but I was too impatient to stop and inquire.

Unbuttoning my jeans, I grabbed his hand and slipped them in my panties so he could feel how wet I already was. Apparently the combination was really working for me too.

Feverishly he pushed my pants and panties down in one motion while I clawed at his jeans. His cock sprang free and it was even more perfect that I remembered. I thought of dropping to my knees and reacquainting myself with him, but after 5 years, I needed this man inside me. He'd gone from being the boy I'd experimented with to the man I had a thing for. It was well past time to fuck his brains out.

With strong hands on my waist he lifted me up, backing me up against the wall, his eyes meeting mine to make sure that I was sure. It was a sweet gesture, given all of the times I'd made him stop, but I was dying to feel him stretching the walls of my pussy. I tried to thrust my hips toward him in demand, but it was hard since my legs were wrapped around him to keep from falling. For perhaps the first time in my life I was glad that I was tiny. Holding me up like that would have been impossible if I'd been tall and athletic like Channing.

Gently he slid into me and my eyes went wide. I was definitely being stretched. I felt like there was no possible way all of him was going to fit, but as I adjusted and leaned back, with support from his arms, the angle began to accommodate him better. I was so absolutely crazy with lust at this point that I would have begged him to fuck me if he hadn't began to slowly increase his strokes.

While the bathroom had originally smelled of hand soap or some sort of air freshener, the smell of my arousal began to block it out. I'd never been big on the smell of sex, preferring clean and neat, but as a bead of sweat dripped off of Jay's brow onto my lip, I licked it up, completely lost in sensory overload. The salty drop reminded me of all the times I'd sucked him off. Having him inside me blew all of our extended foreplay away.

He felt good. Oh my fucking god, so good. I mentally cursed myself for missing out on this for five. whole. years. His hands on my rib cage were lifting me up and down off his cock as he also thrust into me. I caught sight of us in the mirror and it was the hottest fucking thing I had ever seen. I let out a loud moan and he put a hand over my mouth to keep me quiet.

As crazy hot as it was, I knew that I would never cum in that position. I motioned to him to put me down and he looked disappointed briefly before I turned around and motioned for him to fuck me from behind. Unfortunately because of our height difference, we didn't line up right, so I got on my hands and knees - in a public bathroom, which is so not me- and motioned for him to do the same. When he finally slid back in me, the overwhelming need of him nearly made me come—and the fact that there were people only ten feet away.

Jay pumped into me harder and faster, his fingers digging into my hips, both of us doing our best to remain silent, hoping that no one knocked on the door. I couldn't help but cry out when I came a minute later and thankfully, he came a few seconds after. Inside me and without a condom... another first for me but I was too blissed out to care.

Sure, I had unanswered questions. Were we really going to date now? If so, how were we going to make the hour distance and our crazy schedules work? But in the moment, none of that mattered. I had finally... no FINALLY, fucked my Jay. And it was seriously the hottest thing ever. I prayed it wasn't just the fact that we were in a bathroom, but I felt certain I'd get the opportunity to put an end to that theory.

A knock on the door finally did come as we were cleaning up and putting our clothes back to rights. I called out that it would be just a minute and hoped to god that it wasn't a kid outside that would see us both come out of the bathroom. Assured that we looked presentable, we opened the door and quickly pushed past the woman waiting. I tried to ignore her look but I heard her mumble something under her breath as she undoubtedly could smell what we'd been up to inside. I blew right by my coffee cup to run to my car.

"I can't believe we just did that," I breathed, embarrassed, but ridiculously turned on all the same. We'd jumped in his car to avoid any of the patrons from the coffee shop, but I couldn't keep my hands off him.

"You're just full of surprises, Ming-Na," Jay whispered, kissing my neck. For some reason it didn't bother me that he called me by my birth name. It was like he really knew me and accepted me for all I was and it just felt... right.

"Call me that again and I'll have to break out my whips and chains," I joked.

His eyes flashed, "Seriously? Oh my fucking god, tell me you have a whole dominatrix outfit. That would be so crazy amazing. No, this was crazy amazing. Being inside you was crazy amazing. Telling you I've been in love with you for years and having you fuck my brains out in public has been crazy amazing. We can't possibly top that."

"Wait... you didn't say you're in love with me. I distinctly remember an absence of that word," I said, biting my lip and feeling turned on all over again, though it was debatable if I'd ever stopped in the first place.

"You didn't give me a chance, woman. Too busy ripping my clothes off."

"If I tell you that I'm pretty sure I've been in love with you all this time will you take me home and prove to me this isn't just an exhibitionist kind of thing?"

"You bet your ass. And you have a great ass, if I do say so myself. I got an especially nice view of it in there."

"Shut up, you nerd. I love you. Now take me home and fuck me in a bed... or at least on a kitchen counter, or a shower or a desk or... feel free to stop me any time..."

"Why? I'm loving this to-do list, M. I'm pretty sure I'm up for it."

Just then his phone rang and the ringtone caught my attention. One Republic's Stop and Stare... the song we'd slow danced to at prom. He grinned sheepishly me, caught in the cheesy homage to us. He glanced down at the caller id. "Channing," he mouthed.

I answered his phone.

"So, did it work? Did you finally tell her? Please tell me you told her?" Channing asked before I could even say hello.

"I fucked him in the bathroom," I laughed.

"Well, that answers that question. It's about damn time. Just wait until I tell your mom! She's going to be so excited."

"Wait, you talk to my mom?"

"Tay, you've got to be the single most stubborn person on the planet. We knew we'd have to work together if you and Jay were ever going to be a real thing."

I'd switched her to speaker phone and Jay laughed as he heard Channing's last proclamation.

"Thanks for the help, Matthieson... please tell me this means I'll never have to sit through Magic Mike again," he implored.

"Trust me, you needed all the help you could get and if you ever dare to disparage my favorite film again, I'll tell Tatum about how you called Jenna her name and that's why you broke up. Oh, wait... you have me on speaker. Ha! Sorry that I'm not sorry," she laughed and then directed her next comments to me, "Tay, I had to talk this kid up for hours last night. He was so convinced you'd moved on..."

"I thought I had, well, until I saw your text about taking him home to teach him a few things."

Jay shot me a look. He apparently hadn't known about that text.

"I thought that would do the trick. A little jealousy to snap you out of your idiocy."

"Thanks for the help, Matthieson," I laughed. I really had the best best friend, "Wait, how'd you know I wouldn't hook up with the guy at the bar?"

"I didn't. You didn't. You're together now. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a meeting with a student director I'm working with. I doubt our meeting will be as much fun as yours, but stranger things have happened."

I didn't bother to correct her about the goings on with Clark. Since I didn't sleep with him, I saw no reason to bring it up and kill our buzz. I knew I'd tell Jay eventually, because I didn't want any secrets and it really wasn't that bad but that just didn't feel like the moment... besides, there was that to-do list waiting.