All Comments on 'Kidnapped and Defiled Ch. 06'

While the imagination for edgy erotica is there, I must ask, if our "heroine" just a prop? Is she mute? We never know what she is thinking, she never utters a word, she never asks who and why and what is to happen. She is never told about this either! You must separate the lines of dialogue from the other parapraphs.

Can we not know what the heroine (no quotations, now) is thinking? Are we going to be told that whole purpose of the captors, long term? Is the heroine going to know, Can we have real characterization and interaction? Why must these stories introduce a heroine and not tell us what they are thinking at every moment and not enrich the story with dialogue wih her captors? How about introducing a Master/Mistress dynamic, completer with erotic submission through slave/master-mistress dialogue?

Just some constructive and meaningful suggestions? Action is fine but more characterization and mood and purpose and expectation and plot to the story is needed. Thanks and keep up writing.

These are all reasonable criticisms/suggestions, and I will bear them in mind in future writings.