All Comments on 'Laohg and Lily'

This story is a turd. Flush it. Oh, and please don't write again.

I think it takes a certain type of person maybe to enjoy the biblical references. I however am not one of those people. I like a separation of my church and porn/erotic materials. I hope in the future when you write, please let us know that your story is of a very biblical nature. Just a tag alone might make me think it's a romantic tale of a brother and sister succumbing to years of attraction and lust after a bible study class. This however was clearly NOT that story.

Decent story, needs to be polished a little. Maybe instead of brother and sister this and that use their actual names, Curious as to why they walked naked, while he carried Lily and while having sex to McDonalds? Would be interested to see what happens next. Just a little polish and a tweak here and there and you'll be golden. Just my opinion. Keep writing

What's weird is that there are so many things that are taboo today that were actually practiced in the Bible, incest and polygamy to name a few. It was interesting how you used that in your story as justification for the incest.

I'd love to see more with these characters. Perhaps more food play would be interesting. Or perhaps a story of how they discovered their love for one another.