All Comments on 'Las Vegas Vacation'

You started out alright, but you never really developed the characters. There was no actual dialog, just "I said; she told me, etc."

You were too eager to get to the sex and never addressed the excitement or the guilt over the incest.

Oh, yeah, and 'just not bringing it up' in that situation IS lying.

The concept wasn't bad, but there are some areas you should have addressed. One that occurs to me is what made Darlene so driven to have sex with her dad? Develop that aspect. Also, why didn't Dad hesitate or show any reluctance when she came on to him? Dialog might have helped us to know whether he had the hots for her while she matured.

You should think about finding an editor. No matter how many times you read through a story before you post it (you do that don't you?), you will miss some errors an editor will catch. Oh, and don't rely on spell check. It accepts any word in its dictionary, as long as it is spelled correctly. So you get confusions between 'there and their, to, too, two, etc.'

Keep working.

As falcon29 said, the lack of any dialog was disappointing BIG time.

A great story. More incest stories.

Story bored me mostly because of no development. I had nothing to be interested in. I haven't written for Literotica, so maybe I shouldn't criticize, but damn man. I could see how maybe mom and dad would be a little more open to incest because they are swappers, but there was nothing to tie anything together. One mention of way back when at the end of the story is not a piece of the plot. OK, ending rant.

RS

Had to laugh when I read he was married for 40 years but later he indicates they are in their mid forties

Never begin a paragraph with "I"................

Do you plan to continue this or was this it?

I think you have more to with it, so please it cumming.