All Comments on 'Let the Punishment Fit the Crime'

The story is well-written, but waaay too long. While I enjoyed it, I started to lose interest after a while.

Normally when I suggest someone work with an editor, it's for incompetent writing. In this case, the writing is far better than average, but an editor might have helped tighten things a bit. A lot, actually.

In any event, well-done.

Don't listen to the guy below from Tampa. I nice long story with all the details is great. To many times you never get any of the rational, reasons and or the actual details of why things happen. It is about time that there is a story you can sink your teeth into.

Keep up the great work.

and I'm surprised not to see more comments about it.

For me, the issue is not that the story is so long but that submitting it all at once makes it a very big time commitment to read the whole thing at once. (This is one of the reasons that I prefer big stories in installments, though I know some people disagree with me.)

But this is powerful and well-written, intricate and carefully worked-out. It may be that the husband is a bit too-good-to-be-true, but his pain and his determination to try to save his marriage are very compelling.

A very nice job--thank you!

ohio

I enjoyed this story. You used the amount of words to paint a picture that was coherent and fufilling.

High five for sure!

Unlike most stories on this site, this one reflected real life, in that it showed the emotional bonding that must usually take place between a man and a woman before they can move to the level of sexual intimacy. While Bert did make some disparaging comments about “Our Hero”, a wife usually requires the other man to fill some of the emotional voids in her life that the husband is neglecting to meet. Sex is actually not the driving force in most affairs -- it is conversation and affection. In fact, most people who have affairs regard the sex as a minor player. What they appreciate the most about the relationship is the love and acceptance that is communicated in their conversation. Obviously, the husband can’t meet needs 24/7, so friends are important, too. By showing Bert as peeling friends away from Jean, you addressed that point nicely.

You also explored a relatively unknown social phenomenon: psychopaths and how they affect society. People don’t realize how psychopaths have shaped their lives. Many leaders of large organizations such as countries and corporations are, in fact, psychopaths. They are all around us and are very dangerous.

I was pleased that “Our Hero” and Kay did not have sex but were incredibly conflicted about their relationship. Once again, a slice of real life not often seen here. So often, the hero turns into a brain dead jerk that thinks only with his small head.

On many levels, you have done a great job of storytelling. Thanks.

Phil

P.S. - Thanks for not playing head games with us and giving us the complete story at once.

This is one of the half dozen best stories I've seen on Literotica. Thank you capo.

Certainly deserving of an "E"!

I felt the level of detail was necessary to properly understand the characters and their motivation.

I think this is clearly your best effort and I hope it is a sign of things to come.

With respect, DJ

a few questions with certain events at the beginning, but you addressed them all by the ending.

i would have liked a more indepth reason for her cheating. if she had been in love with bert i could have understood. to have as strong a marriage as she did, be as close to and love her husband and kids as she did, and to be so afraid of losing it all, her cheating with just a friend didn't make a lot of sense.

i was left feeling there much more to her reasons for having the affair than what was shared with us.

a great write and a wonderful read though. a fan always.

it make no sense he asking her forgiveness and she was a whore for another man.kay was the herine of the story,she had the right ideal.the real part of the story was kay actions on the cheaters.hubby was like a robot,no emotions.that not how one acts when he finds his wife is a slut for another man.the story was to long for what went down. over wrote the story.

I loved this story. The dramatic build-up of sexual tension was palpable. This is a dramatic tale of how devastating infidelity can be. I, at first, had my doubts about Jean's intelligence quotient, but the author's explanation of a manipulative predator was convincing enough, I guess. In any event, I thorougly enjoyed the story and take my hat off to a superb storyteller.

I've read dry, matter-of-fact articles in technical puplications in my career field with far more emotion than was included in this story. The author had a number of good points to make, but it was done in such an uninteresting manner that I found myself skipping whole paragraphs because I was certain I would miss nothing by doing so. I went back and re-read the story, forcing myself to read every word. Sure enough, there was nothing I missed by skimming through it the first time. That means you're using too many words, writer...and for too little effect. Weed out 25% of this and resubmit it. On your next attempt, try to delve a little into the emotional impact the protagonist would have felt, okay?

Every now and then something like this is published and it makes the effort of wading through the wimp husband and 12 " cock mad slut stories worthwile.

A plausible storyline and good character development.

Well done CCM

story,but the bit that I really liked was where he admitted he was an everyday guy and had never been a Seal ,or a member of Special forces.I knew there had to be some in Lit land!

Really, you are excellant. Thanks for your sharing. I always enjoy your stories.

Only a hand full of times? How many times does this cuck wimp asshole forgive and forget before he kicks her cheating slut ass out of his and his childrens life? She knew what she was doing. She liked being a cheating whore. She wanted more. That is why the useless cunt kept going back. This husband is a clueless dumbass. It's no wonder she looked outside the marriage. By the way, I am reading page 3 as I break to make these comments. One more comment, there is no such thing as an innocent lunch between two married, but not to each other, people. More later.

A excellent story about the reminds us that you need to work at making a marriage. There are manipulative bastards out there and occassionally good people do bad things. I really liked how Hal did not excuse her actions but was willing to accept that she was manipulative. Jean conflict and anguish was very well portrayed. I have two constructive criticisms. First I feel that a substantial portion could have been trimmed without hurting the story and second Jean was portrayed as a little two niave. I recognize that the last 'rendezvous' was necessary for the story line but I felt that Jean still not realizing that Bert was trying to continue the affair was unrealistic. If she was already that guilt striken and unwilling to continue the affair she should have been unwilling to lie to Hal just to see Bert again.

This is just a long winded happy trails load of bullshit. The cheating slut whore and the wimp cuckold asshole lived happily ever after. Bullshit. This piss-poor story is a total waste of time. I was smart enough to skip over most of the bullshit. I did read enough to know that crap like this does not happen in the real world to a real man. Did I mention that this is a bullshit story? I pity any of you sick assholes that read it all.

I agree with some of the others that the story was a bit long-winded and unemotional.

I was happy that they stayed together so thats a plus. I didnt think the wife was beyond hope or the husband was a sucker. Just thought there was too much extra stuff that didnt help the story (i.e. didnt move things along, expand on the husbands angst, develop the characters, etc).

The story wasnt at all bad, just not perfect imo. Making me accept a happy ever after with a cheater that went willingly into an affair (as opposed to just run of the mill cheating), isnt that easy to do but I was happy this couple worked things out.

Thanks for writing.

PS - I do usually like long stories best and I really appreciate you posting it all at once as well. Just trying to be clear that my above critisism isnt just based off the format of the story.

I liked the character development, and the pace of the story. This is skillfull writing,I'm taking notes!

On one hand I thought that the revenge was well thought out and different. It wasn't your usually revenge plot where the husband got to beat up the other guy with special "Kung Fu" moves or goes all out with futuristic gadets and stuff.

On the other hand, *Sigh* where to begin:

One thing I personally hate is where the main characters always manage to "save" their marriage, but the person who (in almost all of these cases) the wife was sleeping with, always ends up in divorce because he is the only horrible person in this affair. The wife is always deceived or offered an excuse or an out, but the other guy, naa he needs to swing from the nearest lamp post for sleeping with the main characters wife.

Don't get me wrong I understand about forgiveness, but what does it say when a writer writes about how only the main characters have access to it and everyone else gets divorced for the same actions? To me it always seemed like it was written that way to make it look like only one to really be blamed for an affair is the other guy not the wife.

I'm sorry but that is another of my pet peeves. I mean in the quest for a happy story alot of the blame gets shifted to the other person. If he drugged her ok I can see that. If he forced her, I can see that. If they only did it one time and she was so guilty I can see that as grounds forgiveness. But where she was sneaking off from work, meeting him at motels, taking "some" of his advice to "clean" him with her mouth after sex, and change some of her wardrobe? That I could never see as grounds for forgiveness. The wife in the story went way to far to please Bert to have everything swept under the carpet like this.

I guess sex between people has become so cavalier that it's really no big deal when someone's wife or husband sneaks off for a quicky with some other person who's not their spouse. I mean I guess that's what I'm sorta seeing in the majority of the cheating wife stories here. Some folks might like to say that it's better for him to forgive and save the marriage, but I guess I'm one of the few that sees it as the desperate acts of a desperate man. Things like this rarely go away enough to never affect the family life again. I mean Bert was having sex repeatedly with the main characters wife and the first thouhts he had in this story was "We've been married for 16 years can I accept this? Can I live with it?" Wow.

Don't get me wrong, I understand the desire for an happy ending as well as the next guy, to me a happy ending doesn't really happen when you shaft the main character by having his wife sleep with a man he despises repeatedly, perform sex acts on this said man first and then do them on her husband later (all while the husband is just happy the other guy isn't getting something he didn't get), change some of her appearance for this man, all while saying that she felt so guilty she didn't know how to handle it. I guess all the sex she was having with her husband kinda helped him get over her affair.

I believe if she was really that guilty she would have either not done it or stopped after the first time, not continue to do it repeatedly. I really saw the fear of losing what she had and getting caught as more of a motivater than stopping because it was wrong.

It was an engaging story, but it was very one sided and let the wife sleep around and the husband basicly wait till she was done (after making sure she wasn't able to do it anymore) and then take her back. I really didn't feel this was a happy ending.

Folks are too cavalier about sex in these story. If in the end having sex wasn't what bothered her husband, but keeping the secret of sneaking around with Bert was, why the heck did he remotely get mad about it. He never stopped having sex with her once he found out she was having sex with Bert. It never crossed his mind to get checked for STD's when he discovered Bert was sleeping with several other women too.

I guess that is another thing that bothers me about stories similar to to this too.

Sorry I didn't like the story, but it was written well and I can't dispute that. It just left me with a feeling of wrongness when I was done though.

-Risq

Very good from start to finish. Characters and writting excellent. Thanks.

I think this story was very well done and the length fit the interest in the plot. To enjoy this story you have buy into the scenario of all the dialogue and conclusions. I can do that with the fact Jean is definitely portrayed as off the wall naive.

I have only one item to quibble with and that is Jean wanted to do this in her conscience mind. She continued to go back to her cause of complete suffering that was destroying her sanity and she realized she was doing just those things to continue her pain. She was enticed and played yes, but then she continued out of a need that she had. This need was stronger then any moral or love she had for anything or anyone but herself and her want. Maybe it wasn’t sex, flattery, perceived undivided attention, or excitement of being wicked.

She wasn’t hypnotized or under a spell she had something she needed that was different and more important then anything else she cared about. She couldn’t stop till the pain finally outweighed her need, yet she still found a need to go back not as a friend but to find more of what she wanted. Only intervening stopped her from continuing and still the facts of Bert had to be made know to her to completely stop her want with him.

As the author stated in this excerpt:

But, God Damn it that was stupid! How could you even think that you could just go back to being his friend? Hell, at some level you must have known it too. Why else did you go to such lengths to try and hide those lunches that you and Bert planned?"

For the last couple of years you have hid a whole part of your life from me."

We never hear what that need she possessed was that drove her to ignore so much pain she new her actions are causing and still want to pursue things outside her husband. Her need of professional help is paramount so she can learn to understand herself and have a happy life with that knowledge and let her be free of doubt.

Was it a need to be paid back for her infidelity and wanted the pain to continue, as she couldn’t ever consider forgiving herself. Self-hatred is a devastating obsession that can build on its self. If so will she learn to forgive herself and let herself give love from within herself.

I liked this story very much and do so appreciate the Authors hard word and insightful plot and talent. This was just so good.

Thank you for the wonderful entertainment.

With respect

PT

you spent some 10 normal pages having the HUSBAND and Kay telling us how Jean's been feeling SOOOOO GUILTY over her fucking around.

"I could see, she's feeling so guilty over it. I just kept hoping she'd come to me to confess; but she never would. But, gosh, was I glad she ended it and didn't fall for it again, but only meant to go to his and Kay's house, just to tell him they're through. Gosh, my Jean, she's done bad things, but you could trust her with your hole heart; she'd never betray you a second time. I stake my life on it!

"Kay and I made her feel so bad and THEN WE FELT SO BAD ourselves for making, purposefully, making Jean feel that bad. Gosh, I'm such a vindictive person!"

You spent some 20 normal pages having the husband and Kay telling us HOW BADLY Jean's been feeling? LOL

"Yes, it's so true; you and Kay are both right. I felt so bad, I was actually thinking of, well, you know, even possibly committing suicide, Hal!"

It's rather pathetic!

Now, I would have NO PROBLEM believing the story if it WERE TOLD FROM JEAN'S perspective, and these "guilt" Hal and Kay were relating to each other were told by HER, Jean, and she let the audience on her own journey into the dark, her various unsuccessful/scary attempts to find our way back, to confess to the man who gave her nothing but love and WHOM she betrayed; AND LAY LITTLE OR NO BLAME ON Bert's supposed supreme "seduction," saying, in effect that it was HER and her alone who must bear the brunt of the reponsibility for CHEATING.

But, no!, the author made Hal and Kay TELL US how guilty Jean was/is over her cheating, in the process making Bert more or less a scapegoat for JEAN'S faithlessness; the pages and pages of Hal --- and to a smaller degree, Kay, too --- telling us how guilty Jean must have been, especially during and after having sucked him for the first time, getting his suspicious going for the first time, he said.

And the story?: both Kay and Hal smiled to each other, stupidly, "Gosh, what a picture --- what naivite --- seeing Jean SUCKING Bert after they had sex in a hurry, in a car, and having him telling her previously co-workers smelled sex on him after they had sex and that THIS TIME she NEEDED to suck him CLEAN,,,, gosh, that's how Jean learned to give head, uh?

"Gosh," Hal almost blurted out, "How terrible! And then she came home and tried to erase her DEEP, DEEP guilt by sucking me like she did Bert, when she's never done that to me before!!!!"

I mean, really, dear author! It's so UNBELIEVABLY SILLY and stupid!

Writing's extremely good, however. Just idiotic story plot.

A well written story but very unrealistic in terms of most couples today. Most men would have not had the patience of Hal to play these mind games trying "to teach their wife a lesson." Jean came off like a silly child rather than a mature woman and mother. When she went back to Bert a second time it was clear how much she did not respect Hal. In other words, her friendship with Bert was more important than her relationship with Hal.

I understand you wanted the reader to believe this psychobabble of her dependency on Bert as a second friend but you wrote how she knew that Bert had crossed the line as a friend. One of the truths in life is that it is damn hard for a friend who becomes a lover to go back to being a friend again. One certainly does not return to being a friend by continuing the secret life of lies and deception.

Also, the mind games played on Bert was justified but mental torture on Jean was not justified just "to teach her a lesson." If I was Jean I would walk out of any marriage when my husband exhibited such cruelty.

If you wanted to show the effect of infidelity on a family you accomplished that with the dialogue prior to Hal's and Kay's mind games. I just do not see how forcing her to confess via these games or lies will lead to Hal trusting her again.

Bottom Line: Since Jean cheat once other than fear I do not see why she would not cheat again. She fucked Bert to keep his friendship so there is no reason why she would not do it again with another "friend." Both Hal and Jean need to be in long term therapy.

SleeplessinMD

Others have commented on the length, but I'd like to say thanks for making it all one story instead of dragging it out over several chapters, which is always frustrating.

...answer a question or two for me?

In this story, we have a wife who was cheating on her husband multiple times. Never acted outwardly guilty about what she did till she slipped up one time and tried to give to her husband the same act she had performed with another man. The husband commented that he never thought she acted any different till her fidelity was called into question that night. Then he started looking for signs she was cheating. I'm at a loss for why you didn't mention this at all.

What I guess blows me away and is really my question, why did you seem to focus more on how the husband and Kay tried to make their spouses see what they did wrong more and less than the act of a wife who was repeatedly having sex with another man outside of her marriage muliple times, while on the outside appearing to be normal and where nothing appeared wrong (but felt it was wrong of her husband to do the same thing to her). The husband even commented on how the children never noticed anything different in her actions till she thought he was cheating on her.

She was doing it in cars, during her's and his lunch break, at motels, etc. I was just curious why you used the term cruel mind games when you referred to what they did, but skipped over what she did? I'm not trying to attack you, but you made me curious. Do you feel that all the cheating the wife did in the story was less cruel than what they did to see if she was going to quit for the right reasons? Personally I would see sleeping around with someone as far more serious (possibly bring home a disease, unwanted pregnacy, etc) then trying to trick them into telling you the truth.

Don't get me wrong. I got a bad taste in my mouth, but just from the out come of the story, but it seems that we both did for different reasons, and I was just really curious about why you said what you did.

-Risq

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(zed)

Are my eyes deceiving me? The Master of Revenge wimped out? Tell me it ain't so! This woman "gussied up" and experimented with her Lover, slept with him several times, AND even after her Husband became suspicious, she went BACK to him? Who are you and what have you done w/CapeCod Mecury?

"Crime:"

Married woman cheated with co-worker/supervisor, more than few times, over some months (though she's gonna say only fucked once or twice; mostly lunch blow jobs, etc. and was real careful so couldn't have given hubby STD, HIV, etc. even if she had wanted to! That Bert, too, was real careful and all,,, Hubby never thought about STD, HIV, etc., so JEAN must have been correct,,,lol)

"Reason:" NONE. Wife gave none. Hubby gave us many pages of reasons, logic, and possibilities as to why SHE cheated!

"Yes, looking back, I guess I didn't think. IT'S LIKE I WAS SOMEONE ELSE, SOMEONE WHO COULDN'T THINK, DIDN'TTHINK! He's so charming, persistent, and sexy I tuned out on all his other bad features, you're right, Kay!

"But you KNOW I would have quit on my own; INDEED, I had quit,,,, that time to Kay's and Bert's house, it was MERELY to see that he stop bothering me,,, I just wanted to go to him PERSONALLY to tell him it's over, history, and that I was not going to be his, ah, y'know, slut anymore,,, So, Hal and Kay, whether or not you two had cooked up this CRUEL scheme, and had called me on the phone, asking me to come home for some fake emergency,,, I would have put a DEFINITE stop to it;

"I MERELY wanted to maintain A FRIENDSHIP with Bert, because such a friendship, I thought, was important! One wihtout lunch break blow jobs and cheap motel sex, of course!"

PUNISHMENT?:

A fake-cheating scheme to convince Jean she has competition, in Kay, and if she didn't come clean and started confessing and THEN change back to be a loyal, trustworthy mother/wife, that she'd lose hubby to her competitor, Kay!

"Result:"

It WORKED SO WELL --- hubby and Kay reported to us the readership (that they were so happy! that it worked that well, even if not exactly as they wanted: a confession --- THEY began to think the wifey might be headed towards possible suicide!

"I wished I could have taken her into my arms and soothed her pains; but I steeled myself, saying she needs just a little more pain, for causing me so much pains in the first place. But even I knew, she couldn't take it much longer; she's gonna break!"

oooookay dear hard working author! brilliant plot and dialogues!

Brilliantly written to force hubbie into the contorted seam of forgiveness that is turning out to be the writers twisted trademark.

For one that supposedly writes towards life the 180's in character displayed here were less than credible.

In fact, there wasn't a character worth a sintar of anyones regard or respect and that appearently was by writer design.

So it puzzles me for the admiration layed at this writers feet when it is really reconciliation without rationality at all costs between characters who deserve each other but little else.

My question to you writer is do you actually believe yourself or do you take pleasure in bending peoples minds around with such detailed but conveluted wanderings.

The characters of little value are:

The long term seducer of multiple married women who is so vile that one wonders how the writer can make him so successful for so long without 1 husband or his wife tumbling to his base ways. Contrived.

The wife who wants a friend so bad she lets him use her mouth, pussy and (?) to keep his words and cock flowing but doesn't understand why her husband would be upset if he found out so go forth and fuck her friend into a deeper relationship. What??? Bent so far from reasonable life that one questions why she exists in her own mind.

The hero who knows she has a long term stud that uses her mouth to clean his cock and her pussy in numerous locations over a long period of time but still sleeps with and kisses that mouth and pussy anyway. Really erotic and sensual eh! But not by a real male - Contortedly wimpish.

Now the one almost passable character is Kay except she still sleeps with dirty dick to play the game to get even and trys to seduce your hero along the way.

A real cast of losers in your web of squares without corners and circles with angles unknown to civilized man to serve the braindead ending long expected regardless of what preceeded it.

Writer - constructively - you have great talent and story teller potential as not many here can wordmeister like you. Further, your expressed introspections are deep but contorted in many cases to your intended ending while ignoring the preceeding foundation you laid so grievously laden with infidelities of length and number.

In short you are capable of what you could want if you set the table to accept what your predetermined ending will be. Until then, you will grow to that end or flounder as you did here.

My hope is that you and many others begin to write to life and acceptable realities with reasonable consequences to build your own credibility and respect.

With some Regard but lots of hope

You got a 25 for the reason you can assemble a story, but the nonsense of it starting out and needing pictures when you had enough proof to sink her in court is a trait which seems to focus on you liking to be put in pain in real life.

This was 10 pages of making readers watch you poke a stick in a wound. That is not fun. I believe you would do better writing about historical events as your on and on detail is too much...way too much.

OK, first of all, I enjoyed the story. CCM, you sure didn't take the easy way out. The revenge taken here was quite different from the other cheating-wives stories on this site; quite an accomplishment considering the thousands and thousands of stories submitted.

There are some obvious flaws in the story - most notably the possibility of STDs and unwanted pregnancy that other commentors have noted. The length of the story was a little much, and I agree with the commentor who said that 25% of it could have been cut out.

Just a pet peeve of mine: there were the occasional spelling mistakes, logical mistakes (when Kay and Hal put their plan into action, at one point you spent a paragraph talking about how Kay was treating Bert, and then slipped up on the names and said something about how Jean was controlling Bert's sex life rather than Kay), that sort of thing. I know it is anal-retentive of me, but for me such mistakes interrupt the flow of the story.

Having said all that, what I found instructive were the comments afterwards (except for the lazy person who just wrote WIMP a zillion times). I really appreciate the constructive criticisms offered; they don't just help the author improve his stories in the future, they also give me things to consider in writing my own stories.

I have no problem with his wish to keep the marriage together, particularly after finding out how she was manipulated. I think however he took the "teach her a lesson" bit too far. It was obvious that she was disturbed by her own behaviour enough that in pressing the "some of her own medicine" stuff as he did, he may well have finished up with a suicide statistic. Oh well, it's only a story

You kept me glued to my seat until I finished your story. That is a testament to your easy writing style in service to a thought provoking narrative. Even though I disagreed with your outcome, I thoroughly enjoyed how you led us to it.

I thought you did a good job dissecting the seduction as well as the reasons for the selection of the targets of the seduction. You did a near perfect job of describing the husband’s feelings, as well as the reasoning for his actions each step along the way. I thought his character was thoroughly developed.

Purposely I suppose, we do not know as much about the wife’s psyche. There are few insights into her behavior. All we know is that she is susceptible to seduction if the seducer is skilled in their technique. I would have to say that none of the women in this story come off looking too well. They are or were all willing playthings of Bert. I am curious to see comments here by women about your female characters.

Also, I too was initially surprised by the little reaction the sexual aspect of the betrayal had upon the husband, that is until I looked at him as a very ‘cerebral’ type, not one subject to emotional or physical outbursts. If I looked in that context, then his priorities made sense and his actions were consistent.

The reality is that most infidelities (to the extent that they are measured and reported) are indeed forgiven.

Thank you for sharing your work.

I do have a few misgivings about some of the plot, but overall it was a good story.

I read it in one sitting - the length was not a problem - it was definitely a good point.

The psychobabble was a bit disconcerting, but just acceptable in this setting.

The revelation of Jean's thoughts and reasons by way of Kay's interpretation was a lazy way to do it - why didn't we ever hear from Jean? How was that such a problem?

Overall, congratulations on the story and your decision to post it all in one go. People still read it, huh??

your marriage survived because you are a wimp. Wimp has many advantages !!! Why have you writen the same thing again and again and again. Before you start writing next story fuck your mother once.

It started out with a lot of promise, for about the first third of the story. But then it really went down hill. The psychobabble was just too much. Do people really talk like that? I struggled to finish the story, just to find out how it ended. I wish I had not wasted my time. The story, en toto, was not worth it.

Good story. I liked the “revenge” and the “teaching a lesson” angles for the plot devices. I also liked and reasonably accepted the happy ending. Good work author.

Now on a personal note, I can relate to the Jean character, and understand how she fell under Bert’s sway. Many years ago when my wife and I were in the early years of our marriage, another woman tried to steal me away from my wife. The woman almost played me like a fiddle, she knew what to say and how to subtlety move me into an affair. I thought of the woman as a friend and as someone I had a lot in common with both personally as well professionally. She used all her womanly wiles to pull me in, but I resisted and refused her offer. I felt guilty simply because I had let things go as far as they had. The guilt was extremely overwhelming and I had absolutely no intentions on having an affair. And I did not get pulled into having the affair.

Author, you presented that guilt pretty well for Jean’s character and I could believe she was truly remorseful of what she had done to her husband and her children. - Good job. - However, on a personal level I have a problem with her having sexual relations with Bert more than once (or even twice at most) before the guilt would have overwhelmed her. You created an extremely loving and good wife who unfortunately fell under the sway of another man so her having multiple (2 motel and 3+/- quickies at the office or park) sexual relations before the guilt overwhelmed her to call a stop to the affair was hard for me to accept. Once or twice could be called an unfortunate mistake, but more than that and it becomes a willingness to betray your spouse. I know this becomes a “numbers game” and personal opinion, but that is how I feel.

Thank you for posting the whole story in one shot.

I can barely imagine how much more guilty I would have felt, if I had succumbed to having the affair. That more than anything else colors my perception on how the wife, if she felt so guilty, could continue to meet Bert for sexual relations several more times.

Jean was / is remorseful? HUH? what stories have some of you guys been reading? she confessed?

This is a Decent story that is well written as are all of CCM stories..Likewise this story like CCM's story is SERIOUSLY FLAWED and shows that the author is still unable to present any MALE character in a rational way

The fact is CCM loves wimps... He is Just better at hiding it than say Grayeagle or Ohio.

The beginning was great-- VERY good and very real. I know that that if my wife did a totally new sex act without any hesitation... It would at least trigger a red flag.

The way KAY realizes that BERT is going after the Hubby's wife JEAN to Hurt the Hubby b/c he convinced KAY to stick with the pre Nup is BRILLIANT.

And the idea of the hubby NOT confronting Jean early but not letting her seen BERT is also well down and very believable. He had NO info and all the crying and wailing JEAN would do could just be a smoke screen since he had NO real hard data and one cannot trust a liar cheat and whore. EVER.

But as in CCM (cape cod Mercury) other well written but seriously Fuckedup story "NIGHT TIME CONFESSIONS Too" the author is seemingly incapable of having any Husband act like a rational Man .... and as a result No one here can identify with him.

what stops CCM from being a great writer is his love affair with being a wimp over being a Man. Rather than learn he rather have the wimpiness

In that story NIGHT TIME CONFESSIONS the super wimp Hubby made plans with his wife to avoid the pussy hound PHL when she was at a teacher s conference... and she betrayed him ... where upon the Hubby FORGAVE his whore wife after 3-4 days on a camping trip.

WHY? b/c one time 12 years ago or some point way back in the marriage he had a Hooker/ stripper touch his dick one for 1 second and another time some woman came on to him at a party but he turned her down.

CCM used those pathetic action as a way to make the hubby accept the whore wife's... to develop understanding. In CCM view of the world... If someone woman come up me a grabs my cock and says "do you want to fuck?"... and I turn her down and walk away.... then my wife has carte Blanche to fuck some other guy any time she wants to over the next 10 years..

LOL!!!!

In THIS story Jean never confesses... she may feel some Guilt over the Hubbys super kind treatment but she never confesses anything. Not at any time

On page 3 the author lays down the tracks for RECONCILATION TRAIN with this shit.. and I mean folks this is SHIT

I looked at Kay incredulously. It sounded to me like she was trying to excuse Jean's actions. "Are you telling me that Jean isn't to blame here? That I should just forgive her because she got targeted by a manipulative asshole?"

"I don't know!" Kay wailed. "If he targeted her like I think he did, I don't know if she knew how to resist him. One reason I was never able to resist Bert was because of my first husband. He was just like you.

You see? KAY's 1st husband was dead. JEAN IS MARRIED !!! hello? Mc Fly???

Bert's attempt to TARGET Jean should have met with a stone wall

two paragraphs late more shit

...."You needed to see that it could happen to you too. I'm not defending Jean, but remember that Bert used her. Don't give up on her just yet."

Again no matter what JEAN "forgot" she was married. Provided there is NOT mental illness at work here the word / vow "MARRIED" means something. Bert's Guile or ANY smooth sexual operator CANNOT work IF the spouse stays focused on the real issue

Instead CCM is now trying to bullshit all of you into thinking white is black and black is white

then on page 3 Hubby says this...

"Fortunately for my psyche, I had discovered the affair not long after the physical aspects had started. (I counted 6 fuckings!!!) I did not think that they had had sex or any type of intimate contact more than a handful of times.

whew !! You go man !!! .... Black is white and white is black

How about this pile of crap form Mr wimp

Jean's angst eventually convinced me that she did still love me. I decided that it would be worthwhile to at least attempt to save my marriage. I wasn't expecting it to be easy, but I owed it to the kids and to myself to at least make an effort.

Huh? Lets review JEAN's angst is over her fear that she will be be discovered (having a long term affair) BUT has confessed nothing to him... and he think she STILL loves him?... I mean come one CCM not even Ohio writes shit this warped

PAGE 7

Kays says this which CCM uses to show remorsefulness

"Her guilt over what she has done to you and the marriage is one of the major reasons she is so screwed up right now. She blames herself for putting your marriage in jeopardy. She sees the problem she caused. She accepts responsibility but can't face you with it....

whoa whioa back the fuck up here... How is HIDING the affair and NOT confessing the SAME thing as ACCEPTING RESPONSIBILITY?

does anyone in their right mind accept and believe this god dam bullshit? I hope not

1 The wife never confesses

2 she has amazingly weak character

3 she doesnt know what marriage means

Wife needs a lot of help and THERAPY

Even though I reasonably accepted the happy ending, in some ways I agree with the anonymous poster “Well written story BUT..........” on the husband character. As I said could I relate somewhat with the Jean character, but the husband seemed too cold, too unemotional, too calm, and in some ways a bit wimpy. I could not get into the husband character’s head at all.

For me the fact that Jean cheated 6+/- times was several times too many. Once is an unfortunate mistake in judgment; twice is plain stupidity; six times is simply cheating. In addition, the multiple cheatings just did not seem to work with the Jean character as she was presented to us.

Again the numbers game. If it had been one time and she had confessed to the husband before the end of the story, I think many more readers would have believed she was truly remorseful. Also the husband character would have seemed a lot less wimpy in the end when he accepted her back and forgave her.

To be honest I was hoping that the husband character and Kay would end up falling in love and going on without their cheating spouses.

Once again, author thank you for posting the entire story in one shot.

The misogynists hate you don't they darling? It just goes to show how few men understand the dynamics- from either side- of a marriage and how to make it work. Because, of course, it's all the woman's fault.

Anyway- it was well written from a technical standpoint- from a personal standpoint I prefer a great deal more detail. However, dialogue and internal dialogue took the place of that for the most part, so it wasn't an excruciating read, but a very enjoyable one. I did read that rambling, ranting psychotic below who went on and on in semi-coherent babble- I disagree strongly.

This is, surprisingly enough in this much maligned category, a genuine and true story of not only a loving wife, but a loving and forgiving husband.

Such a pity that the stroke-sniffers can't recognize reality when it leaps out at them from the page.

FallingtoFly,

Are you refering to the poster below me or to me? Because I liked the story and I hope I have presented well thought comments on the Jean character. And I can see both sides of the story as I related in another post below.

I am assuming you were posting at the very same time I was and you were responding to the anonymous poster “Well written story BUT……” as I was also responding to him. My post just happened to be placed before your post was.

Note: The set up for posting feedback sometimes makes it hard to see who is responding to whom.

Sorry, we apparently were posting simultaneously.

FTF

Only some Dingbat bitch could make a post like the one Fallingtofly made...

If the hubby was Brutal insensitive neglectful controlling etc THEN I could her point about "marriage Dynamics..."

buit in this story we see NONE of that...

cheating 6 times constant lying No confession secret email accounts... is all about the "marriage Dynamics"...

Note the poster Never got around to saying that what Jean did was even the SLIGHTEST bit wrong....

Risq wrote

...answer a question or two for me?

In this story, we have a wife who was cheating on her husband multiple times. Never acted outwardly guilty about what she did till she slipped up one time and tried to give to her husband the same act... I'm at a loss for why you didn't mention this at all.

RESPONSE: I did not mention the wife's acts because it was

the obvious discovery point or starting point

for the story (or any cheating story). It is a

factoid that the most faithful people have the

hardest time seeing clues about the cheating

spouse. Since this is a common element in

cheating stories further discussion would add no

value as a comment.

What I guess blows me away and is really my question, why did you seem to focus more on how the husband and Kay tried to make their spouses see what they did wrong ... The husband even commented on how the children never noticed anything different in her actions till she thought he was cheating on her.

RESPONSE: What this author did was to try to make the wife

a hapless victim. That is why I used the

title "possible but not probable" to describe

the likelihood that real people would act in

this manner. Jean was seduced over years by a

secret friend who "took advantage of her." So

Hal was deceived over years by his wife and he

only found out when she naively committed a

cardinal sin for cheaters - bringing home tricks

from her lover.

I focused on Hal's and Kay's behavior because

they were supposed to be the good guys. If Hal

was going to kick Jean to the curb I would have

judge their torture as appropriate revenge. Is

the quote below consistent with a loving husband?

"I wished I could have taken her into my arms

and soothed her pains; but I steeled myself,

saying she needs just a little more pain, for

causing me so much pains in the first place. But

even I knew, she couldn't take it much longer;

she's gonna break!"

She was doing it in cars, during her's and his lunch break, at motels, etc. I was just curious why you used the term cruel mind games when you referred to what they did, but skipped over what she did? I'm not trying to attack you, but you made me curious. Do you feel that all the cheating the wife did in the story was less cruel than what they did to see if she was going to quit for the right reasons? Personally...telling you the truth.

RESPONSE: There is a group I call the "Reconciliationists"

who seems to always want the couple to get back

together no matter how badly the cheating spouse

acts. I am ok with that outcome if it is

credible for most people. Although there were

parts of the plot I clearly did not like, I had

to say that it is possible that a husband would

have taken Jean back on the "In sickness and

health" clause of the marriage vows. Jean was

clearly sick. She had stopped the affair. So it

was too close to say that a reconciliation was

not credible. I still believe that the Jean

character will cheat again.

I also believe that just because a crime

(cheating) is committed that does not justify

another crime (driving her to the point of

suicide). I am in no way absolving Jean of her

wrongdoing.

SleeplessinMD

some more than others. I can see that you put an enormous amount of time, energy and talent into crafting them.

Thank you!

But if I was impressed before, it is nothing compared to now!

How could I ever imagine that someone who can tell stories like you could quote Robert Heinlen and a line from The Mikado in the same story !!!!!! WOW!!!! (I have been a Heinlen fan for as long as I can remember!)

I'm sure that by now you have learned to suffer the "slings and arrows" of those poor unfortunates who are unable to separate fiction from the pain of their own existence and look more to writers like Blue88, Ohio, Dynamite Jack and others who have put their own quality work out there. It seems to me that we must pay some heed to all the comments but clearly there are some that are much more significant than others.

As always, I'm looking forward to your next story.

What an excessive, over-blown bunch of crap. I'm deeply sorry that you wrote it, and even sorrier still that I wasted my time to read it. Had it been much shorter, the story would have been no better but at least it would have been quicker and less painful. Please, please spare us!

And into the breach I go.

First off thanks to those readers who took the time to read the story and comment thoughtfully. You know who you are. It doesn't matter if you agree with the story, I'm just glad you gave me the courtesy to comment constructively.

Now, that being said, to other commenters who have been slamming me on this and on other threads, OPEN YOUR MINDS PEOPLE! If my stories bother you that much, why do you take the time to read a story that is 10 lit pages long?

This story is one of the few serious stories I have written with a true villian. Someone early on commented on the fact that Bert was a psychopath. I'm glad someone got it. The truth is that I wrote Bert as an emotional abuser and the relationship he had with Jean, Kay and yes the other wives was an abusive relationship.

Abuse isn't always physical and doesn't even have to be based on put downs or insults. Any person who purposefully sets out to dominate or create a dependency relationship with another person for the purpose of controlling them is in a very real sense an abuser. In this case it was a lover, in other cases it could be a parent, spouse, or even a friend. This is a very real and very common phenomenon. Most if not all of us have seen some examples in our own lives.

As to why Jean cheated multiple times and went back after she knew Hal suspected, why does any abused spouse or person stay in an abusive relationship? Why do children protect the people who molest them? Why do we all know people who stay in relationships even when all their friends are telling them to get out? If you don't think it happens, visit a battered womens shelter some time and get your mind opened.

Folks, just because you sitting from the outside would react in one way doesn't mean that the character sitting in the middle would act the same way. A person caught in an abusive rtelationship isn't going to react the way that you or I might. Not every woman would act the way Jean did, but I believe her behavior was plausible for the position I put her in.

As to why Hal took her back, I'm not even going to go there. The wall around the armed camps is high enough already. You don't have to agree to concede that his behavior might be possible. That's all I ask for.

Regarding the question of why Hal and Kay "tortured" Jean, I tried to explain that in the story. Remember, she always held the key to stop the process by confessing. Neither Hal or Kay are professional pychologists. I did my best to show the continuing doubts as to what was fueling her behavior. When Hal noticed that she wasn't behaving in the way that the expected and the kids started to pick up on the tensions, the plug was pulled and the confrontation set up. Once again, would someone else have handled it differently, probably, but its my twisted mind and that is what I came up with.

Off my soapbox and off to bed

capecodmercury,

Thanks for responding to your readers' comments. Your added insight on the Jean character has helped with the understanding of her actions, especially with looking at it from an abuse aspect.

Also, again thanks for posting the whole story in one shot.

That was the worst story I have read in LITEROTICA to date. The pretentious psychobabble was making no sense everywhere. The wimpiest husband I have seen in this site was manipulating not one but two women while he dreams of doing something one day... And how many times have you read “the wimp husband and stupid wife” combo before, RIGHT- endless times! And here it stretches over tens of pages of inaction self pity wining and pouting -everything but simple communication. The warped logic of the stupidest scheme felt like scratch on a glass GEEZ!!!

While initially WE don’t have to know why the wife cheated and came back, shouldn’t the creator of the characters understand it? How could you ask for us to understand your story (I am not talking about approval) if you don’t? You can’t take the fifth on YOUR OWN story! WHY IS very important. Having no clue is such a poor excuse. Imagine the following: ‘This morning I woke up feeling so much resentment to my loving wife, I had no clue why. Then I went to my boring work, yet I enjoyed it all day – no, clue why and so on to the end of the story. ... What a farce. The point is, if you can’t figure out what you are talking (or writing) about. Don’t do it! Write about what you know! (Lesson number one in writing classes).

Now why would you think that you actually wrote about an abusive person that’s another mystery. He probably is a sociopath, and obviously highly manipulative but when did he “abuse” the wife? Your mixed up comments are consistent with the numerous mixed - up concepts in the story. The one saving quality was , your writing technique, but for me, as you suggested the experience will not be repeated

Jean got more than she deserved, forgiveness. This author said it correctly in the conversation between Jean and Hal. There was no excuse for her allowing the relationship with Bert to ever begin much less digress into sexual relations. She is guilty of infidelity and deserved to lose her husband in a divorce. She got way more than she deserved, she got to keep her marriage.

But, Hal also pushed the buttons a bit too tightly as well. I think most of what he and Kay did was ok. Bert's fate was sealed, he was going to lose the meal ticket to luxury, and there was nothing that he could do to stop it. Making Jean realize the same pain she had made Hal feel was not a bad idea, but if it was really his goal to save the marriage, I think he pushed a bit too hard. He could have lost it all anyway.

Over all I think it was a very good story. As you know I would probably have ended it a bit differently, but your ending is plausable to me. Thank you for another fine effort.

Charleybear

What's strange is that both of us seem to see it the same way, but I was just confused on what you appeared to focus on. But I understand why now.

Its also strange we rated the story entirely different as well while seeming to veiw it similarly

(^_^)

-Risq

You wrote a long and intricate story here, and I enjoyed it. One suggestion I have is to use object pronouns after between, at, for, etc. Nice story and thanks for writing it.

Just when I thought that the tired of all formulas had permanently retired I have the irritating exposure to the revival of The Uber Wimp husband and the feeble minded wife - AKA WHSW (Whimp Husband Slut Wife). We have not had such an overflowing serving of that for quite a while. In fact, it feels quite awkward to comment on a story written so well, while the content; and the concepts are so convoluted and extremely dated at that. It’s like the talent is there but the judgment and the social perceptions are so far off that they make no sense despite the smooth style. Oh well.

If I had to choose between the two most common distortions of women in this ‘Husbands Hating Wives’ section, I would have hard time choosing between the ‘wife –monster slut’ who is capable of driving her husband to an early grave, or ‘the little dim witted (equally sluttish of course) wife’ who can hardly think on her own , on things that matter (like: ‘once married, sex is for husband and wife only’) – as this story offers. At least with the first distortion the wife gets to own SOME powers…The diminutive treatment that this wife gets from this husband (read author) reminds me of dated old films from the 40’s and 50’s, were derogatory comments on women in general and wives in particular were a common place. You would hear the good hearted comments among the men reg. the light weight and fragile nature of women, and how emotional they are. Dear…dear. You only needed the smelling salts (needed to wake them when they faint) to complete your dated picture of light headed wife. In this case I would have to ask: in what century do you live dear author? Had you added: “life in Victorian England” to your story’s title, I would have applauded you…

Unfortunately, you did not do much better with the husband’s character. You provided another one of those softer than soft husbands in crisis. Under a guise of ‘monitoring the situation” he softly builds the case FOR his cheating wife! Incredible! Some Incredible examples: ‘she had sex ONLY a handful of times’; ‘she continued the affair but felt badly about it…

As he swears a very very bad outcome he takes us to what amounts to his true joy ride to ‘voyeur land’. The official excuse? Work with me on the logic of this one - the wife is very smart, but is being systematically manipulated…Let’s see. Is she in isolation? exposed to no other sources of information? Is she deprived of contact with loving husband and children? Is she blackmailed? Is she drugged? Does she have a history of mental illness? - Not so. Does she have no moral or conscience which keeps telling her to stop? - Quite the opposite, she seems to be fighting her conscience, as she continues the affair. And in this strange moral calculus it counts to her CREDIT. Go figure.

So then you turn her into half a mental case - how so? Because she feels bad? That amounts to circular reasoning in my book. Or are you suggesting that every woman who cheats is by definition not responsible to her actions or is “a victim”? Yea it’s a mess… because you would have us speculate where you did not bother to create a real character for the wife, just the same old lazy formula.

And his terrible revenge? He makes her feel really bad - GASP! Does it stop her? No, but he feels very emotional!

Initially I wrote down some examples whish should have been posted as “INSTANT CLASSICS” in demonstrating the ultimate “WIMPHOOD”. They literally made me laugh, and part of my rating goes to the entertaining value (even if unintended) of this extreme “WIMPHOOD” examples. But as I see, others have already done some of it. Anyways, THEMES per–se have never been a source of real complaints for me towards writers. Correctly you say –if you don’t like it etc. Where I do feel that you failed badly is in building credible characters. I don’t believe that you understand them, especially the wife (one word –WHY? Can you answer it?). The incoherent plot stems from there.

While your post looks like conceptual art,I wonder why the "25" rating? You need to explain somehow. Are you saying that ANY story about a wimp is equal to to a "25" rating?

BTW, what did you mean by the little:(zed) at the bottom? is that a code? Is that your name? Does that mean that you are not fully Anon. anymore?

I hope you don't turn into a wimp yourself and explain your word(S) better next time.

Sorry about this, CCM- but I have to.

To Harry in VA-

You've obviously never been in a long term relationship that has, at some point, been strained, have you? I have, and I've been on both sides of the fence, both as the one cheated on, and the one who let herself be taken in by smooth words and a quick mind. Now, I make no excuses- I should never have let the little bit that happened happen period- but it did, and I had to live with that.

A woman who does truly value her marriage will do more damage to herself than her spouse ever could. We are champion guilt-trippers, and we lay it all on ourselves. depression, anxiety, insomnia, severe mood swings, loss of appetite, crying fits, suicidal tendencies- we do it all. I thought CCM captured Jean's emotional and mental reactions very well- right down to the acceptance phase, where she just was hoping Hal would come back when she thought he was having an affair with Kay.

Women and men react to cheating spouses in different ways. Some leave without a backward glance, some go for revenge, and some actually want to keep their relationship and will try to work it out. In this case, Hal did a little of both- got a little revenge, and then went on to work it out. It's how most mature couples handle such situations. With this set-up; a 16 year marraige, 19 year relationship, children, and genuinely loving his wife, I thought is was the perfect solution for a fair-minded person to come to.

But, then again, I tend to react with my mind instead of my crotch- and I don't have to worry about the size of my dick and balls compared to the guy next to me at the urinal. One of the many beautiful advantages to being a woman. I hope, Harry, that you have more intelligence and compassion in dealing with the people in your life than you do with people online, because obviously, your masculinity is easily threatened.

FallingToFly

(Again, my apologies, CCM- I did try to keep it civil.)

Like a good movie draws me into the story to where I do not focus on the script, the editing, and the photography, so did this story draw me in. The story was simple but the characters were complex and well developed. Using Kay to explain Jean was vital to making this story work!

I am truly glad that the author did not have Kay do a double-cross on ol' Hal. One villain was enough in this story.

Good job! Keep it up!

One of the best stories I've read on the site. Great plot and character development and a good read. Great revenge on Bert - clever and thorough, which he sorely deserved. Well done.

- to my simple one word challenge WHY? Why did wife cheat? She was seduced does not count it’s a form of rephrasing the question. We know that by any known definition of the English word “abuse” she was not abused, and at all times was at sound mind not mentally ill not isolated or confined and was fully aware of the moral quality of her actions. Could any one respond to the substance?

Probably there will be none, as people (including the author) confuse: HOW and WHY. For ‘HOW’ we get tens of pages for ‘WHY’ –zero; correction, two –<no clue>.So unless I get a response to the challenge I declare a new genre “the no clue genre” Consider this posting a dry run for it. Coming to think of it this genre is actually quite old …It’s called ‘ill conceived stories’

I enjoy these type of stories that explore to some degree the "games" that married people play with one another. Why the wife or any spouse cheated is certainly not a very easy question to answer and probably wouldn't make for a very interesting story. I guess one could say that nature or nuture or a combination of the both is the reason behind the flaw in character that causes a person to eschew fidelity in the marital relationship. Too often we do really stupid things without knowing what we are doing. It would be good if we knew ourselves and our spouses and what we could expect from a marriage before we tied the knot. No easy answers, only difficult questions.

Boyd

First, let me thank the author for letting a discussion which is inspired by the story take place. It’s especially commendable, given the critical take I have on this particular story. But that tolerance SHOULD NOT be held against him! Therefore if I have any more comments I will rate them as a “100” – for the opportunity by this author to let readers discuss and think beyond the snippets.

Back to the Anon commenter. While I appreciate your comment I profoundly disagree with you. My challenge was of a literary nature. I did not ask a Philosophical question –what makes people do mistakes or cheat etc. It was a much smaller one. In this PARTICULAR story, and in these PARTICULAR set of circumstances - what were the reasons? If the whole story is in a way a post mortem of an affair, how could we know nothing on what brought that affair?

Even if all we want is “to move on”. Don’t you need a “diagnosis” before you have a “prognosis”, or a “treatment plan”? Besides, by “why” I do not mean a boring list of reasons. The progress of the plot could have been also the process of the discovery of the reason(S) to the affair. I am reminded of an expression (the name of the person escapes me):”The past isn’t over. In fact, it isn’t past yet”. It strikes me as profound, as we all deal with what we have not dealt with or recognized in our past – and even as nations, every day in the present. We all strive for understanding (and reach different levels of it) of reasons in our daily life at the present, and we find them extremely intriguing in literature as well. ‘I have no clue’ is not interesting - it’s the challenge before or at he beginning of a story not after its end.

I would like to thank the author for allowing this discussion. It speaks well for an author to endure silly criticisms in order to get positive feedback.

You made an excellent point in your comment on 7/12(which I got from the story) that the abuser and the abuse can stay in an eddless circle of response and reaction. Weak people can be victimized by their abuser for years where the victim comes back time and time again to be abused.

Some took exception to the word "torture". Sorry - month after month of mind games which drive a person to near suicide qualifies as torture in my book. I have no problem with these tactics in cases involving terrorists or major criminals. Jean, however was the mother of Hal's children and she was weak (both Hal and Kay had figured out what Bert was doing to her). Once again if Hal was going to kick her to the curb and divorce her these mind games would teach her a lesson and make her appreciate what he had gone through. But at the end for Hal and Kay to try to take the high moral ground with Jean after playing on her emotions like Bert does not fly. Please understand I think what Hal and Kay was credible but their main motive was revenge not to help Jean. Most women would resent the hell of this type of treatment even years later.

To Risq: I rate stories based upon (1) the story as literature (i.e., is the story written well?) and (2) personal likes and dislikes. Given that the author is volunteering his or her time to write this story for our entertainment I tend not to give low scores unless there are real problems with a story. I personally believe that it takes more talent to write longer stories since more things can go wrong (e.g., excessive words, plot inconsistencies). Capecod wrote a 10 page story which was well constructed, had real characters and exhibited excellent flow (I wanted to read it page after page).

Bottom Line: A good story!

SleeplessinMD

Your comments could be proven to be an asset to writers if they were savvy enough to ask for your editorial assistance, prior to posting their stories. This is not the first time I see that you employ in your comments interpretations which are probable takes on the story –yet there is no direct reference IN the story to support your particular suggestion. In that respect you fill a gap, and with that addition we end up having a better story than the original.

The story does not provide that the wife is a weak person. It would have been nice to read how PRIOR to the seduction she is presented as such. But what one can not do is explain her seduction by her being weak, and then prove that she is a weak person with the fact that she was seduced. What I am trying to say is that if she was weak in any other way in her life other than cheating – what was it?

The main clue to the AUTHOR'S perspective on vulnerability to seductions is in the “experiment” which Kay performs on Hal to ‘prove’ that everyone is vulnerable to seduction. Hal has just become aware (and so has Kay) that he have been betrayed by his wife, and at that circumstance Kay takes upon herself to derive universal knowledge about men’s (or human) inherent vulnerability... One thing is sure - in her (and author’s) mind you DON’T have to be particularly weak to be seduced. It sounds like the author’s view is that we are all totally vulnerable for at least the first seduction by a determined seducer. That may or may not be true, but from the story’s “universal pass for first deduction” we unfortunately remain in the dark as far as the rest of the wife’s behavior. We still have not seen anything about HER in particular that would make her an easy prey; or else we want to adopt the absurd premise that any sociopath could seduce any woman he wants upon the universe)

This work deals with a serious subject and is very well written technically.It has a clear ,well stated point of view.We know where the author's sympathies lie as to the question of marital infidelity and his problem solving approach to dealing with such subjects.However,it fails of its intended purpose of convincing us that such blatant disrepect, disloyalty, and contempt shown by the wife for the poor husband can be overcome by the use of psycho-babble,advice of concerned friends, and family.

The crimes of the wife ( Jean ) are egregious.She profanes her marriage vows and her relationship with her husband with equal dexterity.Her actions cut deeply into his personal self-respect and image.By accepting her contrition, is the husband affirming her judgement of him?There is nothing in this work that says the opposite!Jean's actions give no indication that the husband can not expect a repeat performance in the future.The TRUST factor is dead in this marriage !If so, how can there be any marriage without TRUST ? Perhaps this is the new, politically correct definition of the word Marriage !

I believe that the idea of a poker game best illustrates my point.According to the author, you should stay in a poker hand that leaves you with no matching cards!The old refrain says that you have been dealt all 2s and 3s and ,still, can't make a pair.Maybe you can bluff your way to winning with a bad hand ,but it happens rarely.My point of view is that there are times when you have to throw in your hand and wait for a new deal!

I can’t believe that a woman, without any issues against her husband, fall in the web of a manipulative predator, no matter how long it takes to complete the seduction. There is a line that she will no cross. Maybe not the first hug or kiss, but definitively will be the first time he flashes out his penis. If she allows that, she isn’t naïve nor weak or stupid, she is just a slut.

CCM: I really enjoyed your story on a number of levels...I appreciate that you went for a creative means of revenge and with characters, particularly Hal and Kay that were pretty well drawn out. As many here have noticed the story was very well written and I liked the construction in the plot that attempted to achieve emotional balance after upsetting the teapot. I've mentioned this in other comments, but if I remember my college writing classes, this is a classic Comedy story construct (again, not Comedy "Ha Ha", but Comedy vs Tragedy as an element of drama). You did a good job of bringing around the resolution and tied up all the plot loose ends quite nicely. I always like to see a story that strives for balanced outcomes and this one fits the bill nicely.

I may be an easy sell here, because elements of your story remind me of the one I wrote on here about 5 years ago. Like you, I was trying to find a way to lead one of my characters to have an epiphany that would transform her and therefore resolve the central conflict of the story. It ain't easy!!! Also, my story was also a bit long (6 pages), so I can really appreciate the fact that I took in all 10 pages of your fine story in one sitting.

As another commenter mentioned, you gotta love a Heinlein relate...nice touch!

As to respond to some of the various commenters out there...some of the major complaints and criticism of the story include: Why Elaine could get physical repeatedly with Bert and yet still claim to feel guilty or regret/remorse... Others have observed and were critical that Hal was not more bothered by the sexual elements of his wife's affair... There were concerns that Elaine did not confess... Someone equated Hal and Kay's manipulations to torture.

For the first two of these issues that relate to the motivation and ability for the couple to reconcile, it may be worth it for some of the readers out there that for many people, sex is NOT the most important element of a marriage, nor is it held as something particularly sacred in and of itself. For them, it may be a very nice element (if they are lucky) of a relationship, but not on par perhaps with being a good parent, a good provider and a loving partner (not sexually loving in this case, but emotionally). In some cases, it may not even be a major component of the relationship.

I can bet there is no shortage of guys who would rather go without regular sex than their weekend golf, or watching football, etc. For others of course it can be of paramount importance. People are different and value things differently. For some, keeping a family together trumps having an ideal marriage. Still, in a lot of these stories and in the minds of quite a few readers out there, it's perfectly okay to break up a family just because one of the spouses had some sex on the side.

Frankly, wounded pride itself is not ample justification to break up a family. If a couple can work through their problems and get to the point where the relationship itself is not broken to the point that it does more damage than tearing apart the family, then they need to gut it out. It may be a cliché, but staying together and rebuilding a relationship "for the kids' sake" is not the worst thing that could happen.

Sure there are cases where breaking up is absolutely the thing to do and devastating revenge is the order of the day, but in this story, that's clearly not the case. There is no doubt whatsoever that Elaine loved and even respected Hal. In her mind she wasn't doing anything TO Hal so much as for herself and more importantly, for her friend.

For Elaine, it's pretty clear that her sexual involvement with Bert was not a particularly big element of their relationship. If we read between the lines, we can that she came to value Bert's friendship and role as a confidante very highly. Adding a physical dimension to the friendship seemed more like an accommodation to Bert than an end to itself. Since it wasn't particularly important to her, it would be pretty easy to rationalize that she wasn't doing her marriage any real harm as long as Hal didn't find out. People make crazier rationalizations every day. That doesn't mean she didn't know it was wrong, just that in her mind the sex and her friendship with Bert was no threat to her marriage. As for keeping the relationship secret...if she hadn't slept with him, there would have been nothing particularly wrong with maintaining a discrete friendship with someone her spouse didn't like.

One of the main themes in the story is Hal's attempt to get Elaine to realize and truly feel just how much their marriage and fidelity meant to him and how much it hurt for her to have this secret relationship, particularly with someone he hated. The whole story revolves around Elaine finally internalizing how Hal felt so that she could get to a place emotionally where she could understand that while for her, sex on the side was the emotional equivalent of a paper cut, for Hal it was a knife to the heart. CCM did a great job of letting his characters take Elaine on that journey. Nay Sayers out there think Elaine is destined to cheat again, but what they don't get is that Elaine was not so much punished as she had her perception of the world changed. With her better understanding of Hal, there is no way she would inflict that kind of pain on him.

As for Hal's seeming indifference to the amount of sex Elaine had with Bert, it's clear that while Hal was happy the physical affair had not been going on very long; this wasn't an issue about the sexual specifics of the affair. His larger issues were the deceit and the fact that the object of her attentions was such an asshole. For him, it wasn't simply a numbers game of how many times Bert banged Elaine so much as his search to understand where Elaine's heart truly was.

He wasn't predetermined to reconcile by any means, but he was clearly focused on the big picture and saw that a genuinely reconciled marriage was far preferable to any of the alternatives. CCM did a great job of not only putting Elaine through her emotional paces, he also put Hal in a position with Kay where he could better understand the possibility of caring for and even desiring someone, even while he deeply loved his wife. That understanding was also part of the process of forgiveness. He got both characters to walk in each other's shoes a bit and any time you can really understand how someone else is feeling, accommodation is for more likely to occur.

For those of you who felt that Elaine could only have a chance of redemption if she confessed, I think CCM went to pretty great lengths to take that off the table as an option, or as a required element of the story. By the time of the confrontation, what was Elaine going to say that Hal didn't already know, maybe better than Elaine herself? In fact, it was a major plot point that Elaine's fears about the possible outcome of confessing were so compelling that she resigned herself to the fact that Hal would have an affair with Kay and could only hope that she could hang on to him. As he did with just about every plot element in the story, CCM did a solid job of addressing and dealing with this one.

As for those who felt Hal and Kay went to far and that there actions were tantamount to torture and the moral equivalent of Bert’s actions...for all that things worked out in the end, it is true that the steps Hal and Kay took had a tremendous toll on Elaine. Was it torture? Maybe, in the sense that any deliberate infliction of pain is technically torture. At the same time, the pain they inflicted was not an end in and of itself, but a means to an end. Some things can't just be heard to be understood; they need to be felt. You can say a fire is hot, but that only goes so far. After the first time you get a burn, you really understand the need to avoid the fire.

Sometimes pain is necessary. It's one way to train our brains. CCM recognized that there was an element of risk in trying to inflict that level of emotional pain and addressed it in the story. There is no question that Hal and Kay's machinations were morally distinct from the kind of manipulation Bert was pulling. It's the difference between cutting your throat to rob you as opposed to performing a tracheotomy to help you breathe. In both cases you get a knife in your throat and it hurts, but the intent and the outcome are far different. In this case, it was essential to Hal (and to the story) that Elaine get to the point where she felt the pain he felt, not only from a perspective of balance but as a prescription to ensure something like that never happened again.

I’m with those folks who have ranked this story as among the best on here!

Am I up to 10 pages yet...lol? Obviously, this was a powerful story to get so much detailed feedback. Thanks again for taking us along on the ride, CCM.

MrHands

Today, for the first time ever, I deleted a public comment. The comment I deleted was from Harry in VA and was deleted because it was an unmitigated attack on the comments of another person who posted a comment.

I don't expect everyone to agree with my stories. I don't have a problem with people using the forum of the comments for debates between themselves as can be evidenced by the comments to this story. I can even put up with the comments that attack me personally as they say far more about the person making the comments than they do about me.

But I draw the line at people attacking my other readers in a vicious and personal manner. If you want to comment, please keep it respectful and courteous.

Thank you.

Your comments are so accurate. Sexual frequency and practices in marriage are all over the lot and the marriages survive. But marriage is about so much more than sex. Most marriages are probably less than ideal but, if the parties are truly committed, they gut it out. Happy? No. Probably few marriages are really happy ones but after a while the parties realize this is as good as it gets. Would another spouse be better? Second marriages fail at a 50% higher rate than first marriages (60% versus 40%). Question answered. Many people who divorce their first spouse come to the belated realization that they made a big mistake and should have stuck it out and made a greater effort to get along. Hindsight's always 20-20.

Most marriages survive a husband's infidelity. A large percentage survive a wife's infidelity. The two parties must become brutally honest and make every attempt to satisfy each other emotionally. Those are the keys.

MrHands mentioned the relationship between Hal and Kay. You can love and desire more than one person at a time. Just in different ways and for different reasons. Been there, done that. Wife knows and understands.

This story is one of a number of terrific stories in the last few months that have been grounded in the reality of life. You just don't toss the marriage out because .... (fill in the blank). You talk about things, accept them and move on with life together as imperfect human beings.

Great job CCM and MrHands.

Phil

I really liked this story; the main characters were likeable and reasonabily intelligent. The single issue I saw was how Jean could avoid looking guilty after having sex with Bert. I mean she was flustered when Hal asked her about cleaning him; wouldn't you think she would have had even more problems looking her husband in the eye after cheating.

UNREALISTIC.....

I would have had an affair with my co-worker...after all, my wife thought I did...why not fulfill it.

I don't want to be on the high moral ground and let my wife think I am better and stronger than her.

If anything...even if I didn't have the affair because I was that riducously stupid...I would continue on pretending and let her think we are even....sheesh.

Hal and "the other woman" planned a very false and a very elaborate "cheating" scheme to "punish" his wife and Bert, the evil man!

wow!

it hurt so much, both Bert and Hal's wife Jean wanted to commit suicide, eh? Gosh, Hal looked so guilty when he saw how truly helpless, sad, and guilty his wife is over her cleaning Bert's dick, simply because Bert told her if they walked back into their office with his dick all wet, justed pulled from her vagina, that their co-workers would smell it!

So, Jean learned how to suck Bert so well, she started on her husband, too, eh? hehehe

My gosh, the eloborate false scheme to invoke guilt out of Jean by Hal and Bert's wife,,,, it is magnificent! The fucking story started out how angry, how sad Hal was over Jean's cheating....

.... But along the way Bert's wife, and also using Hal's snooping software, was able to come up with a COMPLETE theory to explain not only Jean's goodness (she must have been corrupted, uwillingly, surely!!! by the Evil Bert, who even demand tha she lick him clean before they went back to work after their "lunch break"!!) but also HOW Hal and her needed to make Jean feel like she must confess, in order for Hal feel there's a chance to believe her again...

But then, the whole thing went out of order: Jean's becoming possibly suicidal, Hal and his "lover" were now scared out of their wits. "You need to take it easy on her, Hal... I feel bad for her now..." Bert's wife Kay said!

Hal: "My gosh, what have I done to the woman I love? I have been so bent on revenge, SO HEARTLESS, SO COLD, and now I am pushing her to the limits; she might commit suicide! I feel so bad, so guilty! Gosh, waht am I gonna do, Kay? WE have to end this charade of ours soon, 'cuz Jean might do herself in!"

And before Jean even have time to "confess," both Kay and Hal were explaning everything, "You see, you were not that responsible, Jean. Bert is a cheating, evil bastard. He targeted you, because he knew Hal told me about my pre-nup thing with Bert before our marriage... Don't you see?, you are just one unlucky victim of Bert's...."

Hal: "By the way, Jean, honey,,, thank you for you cock sucking. If Bert had not made you do it, I would never get the fruit of such technique"!

Jean: "Oh, you're welcome, honey. I feel so bad for not telling you; I am such a weak person. Can you ever forgive me. How could you stand there and not throw me out, when I did all those things to you, to us?"

Hal: "Come here, honey bear; you have suffered enough. I was so guilty over your guilty; you had no close friend to confide in, holding everything inside. It must have been hard, Jean honey,,, come here,,, let me make you feel better. That evil man, you made you do all these dirty things,,, but now we can put your knowledge to use between us!"

I mean, I'm exaggerating a bit there,, but WTF!, that's basically what the story turned out to be about. 90% of the 10 page story turned out to be about HOW GUILTY Hal and Kay felt for making Jean feel stupid, guilty, and even possibly suicidal over her fucking and sucking that evil Bert during their lunch breaks?! LOL!!

Why was it that it's not about holding CONSENTING ADULTS responsiblity for their acts? Why did it take two additonal adults --- Hal and Kay --- to come up with reasonable excuses for Jean, on the one hand, while demonizing Bert, on the other? One thing Bert said was true, whether Hal liked it or not: If not Bert, it would have been another romeo who would demand that Jean suck his dick, and Jean would have done it, too.

Bert, therefore --- a bastard that he was --- was also an accidental victim of Jean's stupidity and slutiness. But for Kay and Hal to come up with some elaborate scheme to mitigate and THEN explain away Jean's whoring around and punish Bert as nothing but a disease was incredibly stupid, incredibly silly, and incredibly unbelievable!

I liked your story and it was well written. However, there was one problem. When to use the pronouns I and me. This appears to be a problem in almost all the stories I have read on this site.

Example:

Suddenly, a half-drunken Bert kicks in the door to our room with a camera in his hand screaming curses at Kay and I. He was looking for some counter evidence in the divorce.

Correction: .....screaming curses at Kay and me.

When the pronoun is the subject it would be I, when it is the object (as it is in this situation) the pronoun should be me.

A good rule to remember is to take out the other person in the sentence and see it if sounds right..."screaming curses at I does not sound right.

I love your writing. Admittedly, I have a pet peeve about the quality of education in this country and the increasing use of "bad" (improper) english in news casts and television shows.

I mean no offense to anyone.

Enjoyed thsi story more than most. However if I had been Hal I would certainly have been unable to resist Kay. For her own sake of course you understand.

I liked it the first time I read the story. It was even better the second time. Like the homily, the third time was a charm. ;)

<P>

The prose is excellent, the pacing marvelous, the characters real and the plot sensible. I think what sets the story apart for me is how the author gave Jean her motivation for cheating. It really wasn't about the sex, it was about her close friendship with Bert. Relationship experts tell us that many times the reason a woman has an affair isn't sexual at all but rather an attempt to meet an emotional need. capecodmercury's story shows this wonderfully.

<P>

I'd give this story more than one hundred if I could. It's that good and it remains one of my favorite LW stories on Literotica. Thank you, CCM, for a tale very well told.

but totally worth it...i gave it a 4 as i still wish he had taken the revenge fuck at least once ...he deserved it and his wife did also ...hell kay deserved it also

This one was right on the money! Despite grammar and spelling mistakes...

Even though I do have a few doubts about specifics in this storyline, majorly in reference to the too weak persona of the wife, I must say that in this story and others of yours that I have read, you actually have put in considerable thought into the complexities of human relationships, behaviors and interactions.

<p>

Your story was long for a short story… so? I can only understand this to be a problem if the reader’s attention span is so limited. I did find this narrative form of story telling to make your story feel longer. I’ve noticed this too in some of my unpublished stories. This is why I have not posted them yet, but will rewrite them first. A narrative form of story telling can become very monotonic, easily.

<p>

Though you did build quite considerably, a vast amount of human behavioral psychology into your story, your preposition of the weak wife, on which your whole storyline was founded, I disliked. She was too weak, and therefore conflict between the parties suffered tritely. The same holds true of your villain. He was too villainy.

<p>

Therefore, though you have stepped beyond the simplistical cliques of Louis Lamar and Zane Greyisms, you have not yet completely left them behind.

<p>

Still, there is much for me to learn from you and your writings. I will continue to follow up reading all of your stories, those of later dates, and those you post in the future.

<p>

I did notice a fairly continuous usage of the word “you” when you should have used “your”. Otherwise, the story was quite easy grammatically to read.

<p>

Even though this story is not new, I do want to comment because I feel this story belongs qualitively in the upper one percent of stories posted to the category “Loving Wives”.

Capecodmercury i enjoyed your story Bert was a mind control specialist the syndicate would love to have him on there side i love your writing if you dont mine me saying this you should find an editor to spot your typos .

What a tour de force. Very well thought out and impressive. It's sad, the people here who are too simple minded and judgemental to even understand the story.

That said, I did have one issue with the story. The story paints Bert as very manipulative and even psychopathic, as the author calls him in a comment below. I find it highly unbelievable he would fall for the trap they set for him for weeks and months and allow himself to get cuckolded without doing something drastic. Probably there would have been a major confrontation with Bert that ended their scheme. He could even have tried to kill the husband. But to have him played like a puppet doesn't fit his character as described at all.

Jean seems a somewhat pathetic creature; Kay seems a much better choice as a life partner.

Well written story though.

Well, you sure got lots of comments on this story! I agree with some and not with others, as is to be expected for any reader. One of the problems I have with the plot is the idea that Kay understands an awful lot of psychology considering her job and experience are not related to that field. Was Kay a psych major and we weren't told? I think it does not take a psychologist to read the basics about a person; when Kay confronted Jean and then reported back to Hal that Jean was a "basket case" that's one thing, but figuring out all the complex motivations and rationale of her psyche really seems too much for me. Meanwhile, Jean is a nurse, presumably an intelligent and competent one at that. Having known quite a few nurses, I can say that nurses are quick to seek medical, professional help for themselves and their families because they see the consequences every day when people don't get help for their problems in time to make a difference. That said, I think she would have gone to a psychiatrist or some type of counselor for her depression and anxiety; I doubt she would have just kept it all bottled up. I know it was stated she could not confide in her friends at work and so on but seeing a professional (a psychiatrist or psychologist) is different; everything is kept absolutely confidential and private. In fact, while counseling was brought up at the end, my feeling is that Hal took his "lesson" much too far. Once he and Kay saw that Jean was on a spiral into Hell, hadn't she learned her lesson and hadn't she been punished enough? If Hal loved Jean, it should have hurt him a lot more to teach this lesson than we are led to believe. The old adage, "This spanking will hurt me more than it hurts you," really does have meaning in circumstances such as these. Finally, even though Kay is bitter, angry, upset, and betrayed by old Bertie, she tells Hal that she feels Jean was sucked into the affair and it was mostly Bert's fault. In the same breath, however, she calls Jean a "bitch" and other derogatory names when discussing Jean with Hal. If Kay is really Hal's friend, why use that type of language when she knows Hal still loves Jean? Of course, I still found it to be an enjoyable story (despite the occasional grammatical and spelling error) and a captivating read. Please keep writing.

Very well balanced story. Empathic and stirring. Not a plain cheating wife story like many others. Thank you for this great work. One of the best stories in this genre.

<p>Sincere regards</p>

<b>Nucleus</b>

That was the best i read this back when you posted this story and i loved reading again.

another Great story capecodmercury.

EXTREMELY, intense, detailed and well written story. Your characters' personalities were so real and vivid. Jean's character shows exactly how one's personality can changed when exposed to punishment for long periods of time (anxiety, guilt, and stress, all forms of self punishment) I especially loved the reference to the look of a kicked dog about to be kicked again. A perfect reference to the effects of long term punishment. Though I realize that most people don't have a clue when it comes to behavior so they may assume that Jean's character has always behaved so eradically when in fact it was the result of Bert's brain washing and manipulation that brought on the self-punishment which in turn caused the disassociation and depression. Unfortunately, this condition can have long lasting effects but with proper treatment and meds she could recover fully in one to two years. Until she gets a little better I'm not sure if she would get a lot out of marriage counseling since most of their treatment would surround that disorder. But as you pointed out with Hal there as her anchor it would give her a good starting point. Very well written, especially from a behavioral stand point. I've even know some people that are almost as deviant and manipulative as Bert. Of course, you never really know how devious a person really is, so, who knows? Again, excellent detail and structure and all behaviorally consistent. You can tell a lot of thought went into this story. I really enjoyed it. Thank you

"Don't tell me you are thinking of forgiving her," she spat.

"I don't know." I said glumly. "I'm still figuring out what to do

Now what kind of a freak is this man. He just tells Kay that her husband is cheating with his wife and he knoiws that he may cause her to get a divorce and still he thinks this way...capecod lead you are weird....marriedwithballs@yahoo.com

Whew, you took the long way to get there, but it is still unbelievable.

He should have divorced Jean and went after Kay, Jean is obviously a slut and Kay is the much better of the two.

I do believe reconciliation can be a good thing under certain conditions, this however wasn't one of them.

When a spouse engages in extramarital affairs the damage done is almost always insurmountable as love isn't as strong an emotion as most writers tend to use as the reason for overcoming adulterous affairs. There is a very fine line between love and hate and the alienation that occurs as a result of marital infidelity tends to destroy any love that may have existed, especially in an already troubled marriage.

The thing that always drives me insane with these stories is that both spouses always profess a undying love for each other, if this were the case the adulterous affair would never have taken place. Single occurrences of adultery can be written of as mistakes but planned out affairs indicate the love has left the marriage and the party wanting to engage in adultery should simply ask for a divorce citing the fact that they no longer love their spouse. I think with all the medical issues present in todays world such as the widespread increase in S.T.D.'s that this type behavior is totally inexcusable.

CCM wrote a piss poor defense that was almost laughable on 7/12/06. He made several points...

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OPEN YOUR MINDS PEOPLE... but CCM you cannot ask readers to open their minds to the point that their brains fall out.

<br></br>

CCM asserted :

<br></br>

1. Bert a true Villian and a psychopath.

<br></br>

2 It is hard to Figure out why any would stay with an abuser.

<br></br>

3. CCM like the lover of super wimps stories we know he is Totaly ducks the issue on WHY Hal took her back. CCM asks us to concede that HAL * MIGHT* of taken her back... Thats all I ask...

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NO CCM you dont get it. None of your points are valid. The words at the end of the story by Kay to get the idiot wimp Husband to talk to Jean are OFFENSIVE and VILE.... regardless of Jean's psychological make up.

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<b>This is CCM's story. They are HIS characters. If CCM cannot give us a reason WHY Jean cheated so much so often so many times you cannot expect readers to accept the ending. </b>

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You see it goes both ways. YOUR defense -- the one you wrote 7/12/06 argues Jean is deeply troubled mentally.

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OK fair enough. She very well might be. But asking readers to accept Hal taking Jean back with NO explanation and no therapy KILLS the ending. Her sufferring is NOT enough.

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Kay's argument that Jean isnt to blame here because of Bert's super secret powers of seduction is a fucking Joke. <b> Kay fell for Bert but her 1st husband was DEAD. Jean was Married which is a point that the super wimp Husband never raises. </b>

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After they separate... and the idiot Husband Learns of Jean angst and suffering. Even though the wife still had NOT not confessed and still had NOT apologized He says <i>"Jean's angst eventually convinced me that she did still love me. I decided that it would be worthwhile to at least attempt to save my marriage. I wasn't expecting it to be easy, but I owed it to the kids and to myself to at least make an effort... </i>

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How is Jean sufferring at being caught support the idea Jean still loves him... ???

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finally at page 7 Kay says this ...<i>""Her guilt over what she has done to you and the marriage is one of the major reasons she is so screwed up right now. She blames herself for putting your marriage in jeopardy. She sees the problem she caused. She accepts responsibility but can't face you with it....</i>

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How is HIDING the affair and NOT confessing the SAME thing as ACCEPTING RESPONSIBILITY?

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<b>SUMMARY its NOT why Jean cheated that is the problem with the ending CCM. Its that you make the idiot hsuband out to be the bad guy for being reluctant to take her back without any answers remorse or therapy or change </b>

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I passed on this long ago because of its length. I'm sorry I did that now. I missed a lot of great stories because of this. I have been going back and reading those stories now, and I have been greatly rewarded. I won't comment on the various "plot deficiencies" pointed out by other readers, but I can honestly say I didn't find them. I feel you explained everything I wanted to know sufficiently well. I don't know if I could have forgiven my wife if it had been she, but thank God I never was faced with the situation. The one thing that helped was when she was afraid that Hal was getting wise, she didn't just try to put the affair on hold, but instead broke it off. I know that other readers might wonder why it took this to make her think about it, but my thought is that she needed Bert as a confidant and sounding board for some strange reason. She didn't instigate the sex, but I feel that to her it was the cost of keeping his friendship. She was never comfortable with it, but as was mentioned, she was able to compartmentalize it away from her marriage, albeit with some guilt. Some readers have said that an intelligent person couldn't have fallen for Bert's line. To them I say "get real". The world is full of smart people who do dumb things. Why do you think the world is in the mess it's in.

This story was an excellent read. I couldn't stop till I finished it at 3AM. i hope you continue to provide us readers with such well thought out, well written stories. I found the story to be very believable, contrary to some comments that were left (by what appear to be very narrow minded readers). I found your delving into the psyche of the participants very captivating, especially Jean, who was blindsided when what she had thought was friendship turned out to be incremental malevolent manipulation over a very long period of time.

The explanation of how she fell is terrifying. All you have to have is a tendency to treat people as special people and they can take control of your mind. The only defence is to discuss everything that is going on with someone that you trust and is very sharp and experienced. Where do you get this figure from?? This story did have the problem of Jean accepting her punishment at what she considered a lower level of punishment. The moment that that became clear they should have taken her in for medical help. She has had her personality crushed!

Some of the commentators leave me wondering. They turn it clear that if they do not have the plot that they want that the author's effort loses all value. Since there are all kinds of tastes out there it is hard to understand how anyone reads these stories anymore if they get so upset!ertainly if there opinions reflecting the feeling of the rest of us practically nothing would have a score above 2.5!

Bullshit. Are you going to write a story where the characters are real? Are you ever going to write a story where the cheater takes full responsibility for their actions? How about a real life ending where the husband doesn't act like a woman. And that is no slight again woman, they react to cheating completely differently then men. Hal is a woman.

Almost from the very beginning it was fairly obvious what the ending would be. Over and over again the same issues were dealt with, always emphasizing the fact that Jean was not responsible for her scurrilous little affair. And of course, there were the incessant paragraphs in which Hal ruminates about his complicity (somehow), reflecting on his guilt feelings regarding his association with Kay. Never mind that he did nothing, it is the thought that counts.(Typical of the moral equivalency crowd)<p>

Everything was written in such a way as to justify the ever so sweet reconciliation between Jean and Hal. Never mind that she was a dumb, promiscuous, self-asorbed cum-dump who would have renewed the affair if her husband and Kay had not stopped her.<p>

The writer is so transparent in his presentation of the characters that is was necessary to fill the story with a nauseating amount of psychobabble in order to hide the transparency.<p>

Must these writers repeat the same issue or theme over and over, changing only a few words each time, in order to make a point or describe a situation? They surely have a very low opinion of their readers to think that they cannot possibly understand a once-stated passage. Or maybe it is that the writers themselves do not really understand what it is they are writing about.<p>

All in all, an overblown an pretentious piece of work.

like a lawyer, or a therapist, it takes you 10 chapters to get to the jest of your story. That is the reason for a score of 25, if you would have had more drama instead of all the analytical crap, your story would have been better. I don't care about the outcome of the story, because it is just a story, it's just how long it takes to get there. Otherwise your writing is good.

All of this writer stories are the same men are idiots they always forgive after after a whole lot of soul seaching, what world do you live in.

This story is part psychological text book wrapped in a story. I enjoy the psych understanding the author brings to his story. Others write that it is too professorial. I learn a lot from capecodmercury.

The wife was a slut, doesnt matter why, doesnt matter how man times. She was carrying on a secret affair whether or not sex was involved. In this case, sex was involved and bareback sex at that. Shame he didnt divorce the dim witted slut and marry Kay to raise the kids. Would have made a lot more sense.