Life as a New Hire Ch. 10

"That wasn't going to be good enough for me," she tilted her head up to study my eyes. "I got his baseball bat instead and knocked them all out real good. I found a few garbage bag twist ties, tied their hands behind their backs and went at all three with a knife. I gutted them a bit so they were awake and in a shitload of pain...then I hacked their cocks and balls off."

I was less revolted than I thought I'd be. I still felt my dick shrivel and my balls trying to retract into my bodies. I certainly wasn't going to joke about it; this was a serious sensitive moment for her. I stroked her hair. I could live with this revelation. I wasn't sure why I could, but my heart and mind weren't freaking out, so I went with my instincts.

"I had barely finished up when the cops came bursting in. I had taken far longer torturing them than I imagined and their screams had been heard all over the housing complex. They Tasered me, I went to jail and finally to trial. My defense attorney argued an 'Insanity' Plea and I ended up in a mental facility," she was clearly relieved that I wasn't terrified.

"A few months later, Katrina showed up," Buffy continued. "She wasn't where she is today. We talked a great deal, but there were only two crucial questions for her. 'Do you regret killing those men?' and 'Can you have sex again?' I answered 'no' and 'yes' after some thought. Two weeks later, I was transferred to a Havenstone facility, they cleaned me up, trained me, and I was stationed here."

"What is with you and Elsa?" I prodded a handful of minutes later.

"Don't go there, Cáel," Buffy muttered.

"Do you seriously want me to confront her not knowing the whole score?" I countered.

"She is a complete and total racist Bitch," she grumbled.

"Please don't tell me it was a sex contest," I groaned. "If she is better than you, I'm going to die." Her grumbling lack of an explanation allowed me to crack a joke. Buffy 'punished' me by kissing my chin.

"No, it wasn't a pussy-thing. If she can fuck you better than me, you have my permission to die," she smiled playfully.

Scary. I was so used to her being scary, Buffy not being scary was scaring me. Push?

"Well, the only thing I can do then is a Buffy-Elsa-Cáel three-way," I sighed.

"Okay," Buffy murmured.

"Stop it!" I shouted. "You are freaking me out."

Buffy giggled. I was howling off into madness on the inside.

"I think you have company coming soon. We should get clean and put some clothes on," she exhaled joyously. By dressed, Buffy meant putting on my dress shirt - unbuttoned. She was like that, cross-legged on the sofa, eating Cheese Puffs and watching 'Real Housewives of Mumbai' when Odette arrived.

It took Odette a second to realize this Buffy was the same firecracker from the last time they met.

"Hi - ummm," Odette started.

"We are fine. He fucked me. I'm in a state of grace," Buffy explained pleasantly...without a hint of menace, or fury.

"Buffy - Odette Sievert," I made introductions. "Odette - Buffy Dubois." Odette strode right over to the sofa and plopped down beside Buffy. I had to struggle to not flinch.

"He gives an incredible dicking, doesn't he?" Odette bubbled.

"Yes," Buffy purred, "Yes, he does that and more. You are new to this whole 'love-making thing, aren't you?"

"Pretty much," Odette openly admitted. "He gave me my first orgasm. I didn't realize how good sex was until I met Cáel."

"I didn't realize how good sex was until I met me either," I joked.

"Trust me," Buffy patted Odette's thigh, "I know a great deal about sex and I can assure you he's really, really good."

"You are not wearing underwear," Odette noted. Life only got more bizarre.

"Why don't you go into the bedroom, get one of his used dress shirts and put it on - and nothing else," Buffy advised. "It is a wonderful experience."

"Oh God, don't I know it," Odette exulted. She jumped up and skipped into my bedroom.

"Don't play with her," I cautioned Buffy. Buffy studied me then gave me a glowing look.

"I'm trying to be a better companion Cáel," she told me. "I know I've put you through hell. I'm not going to apologize. I like the look of fear in your eyes. It is only matched by that look that says 'I'll get you for this'," she chuckled.

"Just for that, its reverse cowgirl for you the next time we make love," I threatened.

"How is that a threat?" Buffy teased. "I am absolutely positive you like my butt."

"I bet he likes all of you," Odette sang out as she came out twirling in another one of my dressed shirts and nothing else.

Odette had change really quick. I knew she came over bra-less. I was suspecting no underwear, or socks too. She sat down tightly next to Buffy.

"So, how is this 'sharing' thing going to work?" Odette looked back and forth between us.

"Have you ever been with a woman?" Buffy asked. "Don't be embarrassed about curiosity."

"Aaahhh...well, a little," Odette stammered.

"Here is how it works," Buffy patted Odette's nervous hand. "I can only have sex with Cáel for five and a half more hours for the entire weekend. Since I like sex and you are here, I'm certainly interested in you."

"Odette," she reassured my bed-buddy, "there is no pressure. I have gotten the most important thing - quality time with Cáel. Everything else is a bonus."

"Oh - I'm okay with that," Odette nodded. Then she leaned in to kiss Buffy...maybe I should create a 'Sex for Beginners' CD. I was working gangbusters on expanding Odette's sexual horizons.

Buffy wrapped a hand in Odette's hair and drew her into a steamer kiss. I settled in behind Odette, switching kisses between the back of Odette's head and Buffy's hand.

"Wow," Odette panted. "You taste different than any guy I've kissed. I like it, but I like Cáel better."

Before anyone thinks this never happens, or 'only in Hollywood (West Hollywood, that is), please understand I went to a rural college with a 70% female student enrollment. Convincing a girl to engage in a little girl-on-girl action to 'get me extra aroused' is insanely easy. The few times a lady has asked if I'd kiss a guy to get her 'extra aroused', I said 'for her and only for her'.

Works every time. I've kissed a few guys, but only for charity. Fine...I've kissed a few guys in gay bars because Timothy intimated that we'd get our butts kicked if I didn't. He may have been playing me, but for all the shit I put him through, I can live with that. Back to the story: we had Odette in my bed in no time.

I was on the bottom, Odette was lying on me, back to my chest and I was using my hips to piston into her while she moaned on top of me. Buffy was alternating between tantalizing Odette's clit and teasing her nipples. Using a very liberal definition for 'touching me', we decided that this wasn't consuming any of our 'exemption' time.

Three orgasms later, Buffy poured an uber-contented Odette into her/my shirt and I carried her to the sofa. I put Odette's head in Buffy's lap, Buffy twirling Odette's forelock and Odette humming a happy tune. I was getting some apple and orange juice when Timothy's keys jangled in the door. He walked into the apartment and soaked up the scene.

I took in that it was barely 8:30 and Timothy was in his date clothes. A seriously not-good situation. I diverted to him, drinks in hand, and hugged him.

"Sorry Bro," I murmured. He hugged me back. "Buffy DuBois, this is Timothy."

"Buffy? The crazy chick who wanted a hug?" Timothy chuckled.

"She's not..." Odette mumbled.

"Yes, that would be me," Buffy grinned sedately. Timothy looked down and shook his head.

"That is some dick," he groused. "Damn Bro, "Timothy regarded me with some amusement, "did you bother to get her panties off, or was the mere thought of sex with you enough to cause a complete personality reversal?"

"Cáel," Odette raised a shake arm and commanded loftily, "put the drinks down and get us some ice cream. It is Bonding Time." She meant commiserating with Timothy over his dating failure. Timothy trundled off to his bedroom muttering something about 'getting into something more comfortable' and I delivered the drinks then doubled back for the ice cream and four spoons.

Timothy ended up on the floor with his head resting against Odette's stomach. I offered to take the bottom spot. Timothy accepted the gesture then pointed out I was the guy with the bum leg. I ended up with Odette's feet in my lap. The flavor of the night was Cherry Vanilla and we were all making inroads into the supply quickly.

Timothy dialed up Ninja Assassin on Netflix. Ten minutes in I realized why. There was this Asian actor who was really hot and extremely physically fit. Odette agreed.

"You two can't believe any of this is real," Buffy commented shortly after. "This is absurd. Nothing and no one kills like that." She had professional pride after all.

It hadn't taken me three days to figure out that the Executive Service babes' main purpose in life was not laundry delivery. They went everywhere and saw everything - just like a secret police force. Odd, huh?

"Speaking of absurd and unreal," Timothy snickered.

"Cáel, two ladies screaming Extreme High Maintenance showed up this morning. Apparently you weren't answering your phone, work said you were out of the office, and some spooky chicks at Havenstone showed them the door with something akin to a threat of lethal violence," he continued. "From long experience as your roommate, I could tell you'd fucked them to Nirvana and they wanted more."

"From long experience'?" Buffy wondered. "You haven't known him two months yet."

"Lady, this happens at least once a week with this guy. You are playing with the hair of one of those women right now," Timothy told her.

"Yeah," Odette sighed happily.

I was still wrapping my mind around the fact that Buffy hadn't threatened me with violence in the past four hours. Not even a glower.

"So, what did you tell them?" I asked my bud.

"I looked terribly put out then informed them you'd decided to become a Dominican and gone to a monastery in Italy to train," Timothy smirked.

"What did you really say?" I thumped his head with my spoon. Before any goes 'eww, don't eat with that', I would remind you how pervasive hair is in a bachelor pad. Vacuum and you'll find out.

"I told them you work in Looney Tunes Central - which they bought surprisingly easily - and that you would give them a call the moment your destiny was returned to you," Timothy said.

I was willing to bet he used those exact words too.

"What has Cáel told you about Havenstone?" Buffy prodded.

"No way, Buffy," Timothy shook his head. "You are still one of those crazy bitches. Cáel hasn't told me the real deal, but when he looked me in the eye and said you ladies might kill me, I knew he wasn't playing around. He was afraid for my life."

"Do you really think we would hurt you?" Buffy persisted.

"You put an arrow in my boy...and he's got the magic dick. Since I'm not likely to put out for you ladies, I pretty much believe you'll put one through my heart without batting an eye," Timothy countered.

"What would you do if he simply stopped showing up one day?" Buffy mused.

"Not ask," Timothy snapped off his reply. "I trust Cáel enough to heed his warning and get on with my life."

"Cáel has a big heart," Buffy regarded me warmly. "It is one of the many things that makes him a great prize."

"Salmon - Angel Falls," Timothy taunted me. Before I even started at Havenstone, he had warned me that I had no chance of making it in that women-dominated Hell. He was right and he loved rubbing it in - the Bastard. To clarify: a salmon is a stupid fish who follows his penis to his death and Angel Falls in Venezuela is the Earth's longest, continuous waterfall - that's 807 meters for those who don't want to use Wikipedia.

"Timothy, if there was any doubt, there will be no mention of Tuesday night and what came afterwards," I urged my guy.

"Way ahead of you," Timothy chuckled. That was Rhada we were talking about.

"If you are going to hang around Cáel, you will have to get used to all the other ladies," Odette sighed comfortably up at Buffy.

"I know," Buffy stroked Odette's ear. "Also, if you see me outside of Cáel's home, be afraid of me because if you aren't, bad things might happen to you. Do we understand each other?"

"No," Odette hesitated to respond.

"Don't worry about it - just do it," Buffy warned her - affectionately. I was going mad.

For the rest of the movie, everyone behaved. We emptied the ice cream container. Timothy went for beers. He bought back three.

"Where is mine?" Odette inquired.

"I don't think you are old enough to drink," Timothy told her.

"Odette, if you give Buffy a kiss steamy enough to curl her toes, I'll give you mine," I offered. Odette weighed the offer, rolled over and crawled into Buffy's lap. The kiss was classic me - teasing contact - light tongue - full kiss - re-arrangement of tonsils. I was so proud of my girl.

"That was exceedingly pleasant, Odette," Buffy grinned once the French kiss eventually ended.

I handed Odette my beer. She remained straddling Buffy's lap, perfectly at ease.

"Dude, do you have any guy friends you can bring over and make gay?" Timothy pleaded with me. We knew that didn't happen. "Fine, bi will do," he grinned.

"I'm not a lesbian," Odette wiggled in Buffy's lap. "I just like Buffy."

"Buffy likes you," Buffy placed a light kiss on Odette's lips. "Let's go to the bedroom." Acid test time.

"Sure," Odette hopped up. She took Buffy's hand and pulled her up. Hand in hand they went to my room. I rose to follow.

"We'll call you when we are ready," Buffy teased me. They went into my boudoir and shut the door.

"Now you know how I feel," Timothy sighed.

"Not really," I patted his shoulder. "In thirty, or forty minutes, I'm going to go in there and do some serious boning. Personally, I don't know how you take sleeping alone so often."

Timothy and I sat down on the sofa.

"You are an asshole," he grumbled.

"Considering what you do to assholes, I don't know how to take that," I joked. He hit me.

"Being gay would be the only thing that would make you more fun," Timothy laughed.

I wondered how Katrina would take my sexual conversion. I deciding telling her would be unwise. . I had another rescue flare about how out of control my life had become - Odette had seen my latest series of bandaged wounds and hadn't forced me to create some lie to explain them away. Damn.