Light of Dusk Ch. 01

The shoes, she realized, were the reason for the height disparity. The soles were thick, adding an inch to his height; whereas, she was barefooted, subtracting from her own height.

"You look beautiful." A total lie but it was nice to hear, even nicer to hear from him. "Let's go to our diner, the one downtown. I want to buy my kid sister a burger and a milkshake."

Dawn parked her rosy pink station wagon on Elmwood Lane. It was a long walk to the diner, about four blocks, but they could get no closer to downtown on a workday without paying the ridiculous prices of the parking garages. She didn't mind the walk, not on such a nice day and not with her current company. Jeff was more than up to the challenge. His body was in such phenomenal shape. He probably could have walked the twelve miles from home to downtown without sweating a drop.

Jeff clung to Dawn's elbow as they braved the notorious intersection of Ash and 12th street. The contact felt far more dangerous than the traffic. Looming ahead, a man in a giant foam lobster costume lurched along the storefronts, passing out flyers for the grand opening of the Captain's Catch, a new seafood restaurant. Jeff politely accepted a flyer as they passed. He folded it and stuffed it in the zippered cargo pocket of his dungarees.

Dawn squeaked. Something soft and foamy had grabbed her bottom. She rubbed the dark denim shorts as the lobster snapped his claws suggestively. Jeff confronted the lobster man. "Did you just grab her?" he asked. His voice rose when the lobster didn't immediately answer. "Did you?" Finally, Jeff broke a sweat. Moisture gathered under the arms of his pewter gray shirt.

"No, man, I never touched your girl." The lobster man innocently raised both of his claws. The voice inside the costume sounded young. He was probably just some teen making minimum wage.

She grabbed her brother's elbow, pulling him away from the lobster boy. "Come on, Jeff. Let's have a nice lunch." She would have been successful averting a confrontation had she not been grabbed a second time. This time the pincher aimed between her legs. Dawn squeaked as the bulky claw contacted the crotch of her shorts.

"I didn't do anything!" The lobster boy protested before an accusation was even leveled.

Jeff stomped towards the lobster boy. Dawn tried to stop him. She didn't know how far he would take the confrontation. The only time he had ever gotten physical was with Jase Riley, avery different situation. "Jeff, don't. It was probably just an accident."

"Yeah," the lobster boy raised his claws defensively. "It was an accident. I swear!"

"Accident my ass! If you think I'm gonna let my kid sister get molested by some crustacean---"

Dawn interrupted with a burst of laughter. Jeff sounded so serious. Defending her honor against a foam lobster, it was all too silly.

"See," the lobster boy pointed a claw as Dawn giggled. "She liked it." That was the wrong thing to say. Jeff grabbed the claw and ripped it from the costume, not too hard a task considering it was attached with Velcro. "Please...don't..." Jeff seized the costumed boy in a headlock, dragging him to the road. An ebony Cadillac sedan rested parallel to the curb. Unfortunately for the lobster boy, the Cadillac's owner had neglected to lock the passenger door. Jeff opened the door, hammered his palm on the lock, and then slammed the door shut on the foam and wire antennas protruding from the lobster costume.

The boy strained and struggled, but unlike the claw, the headpiece had been permanently attached to the bulk of the costume. Until the owner of the Cadillac returned, he was trapped. "Sir! Miss!" Jeff and Dawn continued towards the diner as the lobster boy called for help. Dawn almost felt sorry for the boy, almost. "Mr. Hernandez, I think I'd rather work in the kitchen..." The lobster boy's last words infected Dawn with a fresh bout of giggles. She laughed harder than she had in a year.

Jeff stopped her just outside of the diner. Her giggles earned curious stares from passing strangers. "Dawn, have you lost your mind?" The smile on Jeff's face proved her laughter contagious.

"You--" Another giggle interrupted her sentence. "You beat up a lobster for me."

Jeff's smile halfway faded. "I would do anything for you."

He would. She knew he would. Dawn's heartbeat increased, chasing away the giggles. "That was the weirdest thing that has ever happened to me," she said.

"Was it?" Jeff asked. His mossy eyes searched her own. Dawn tried to look at the ground but the pockmarked cement, discarded chewing gum and lone penny seemed far less interesting than Jeff did, so she focused on his scuffed hiking shoes.

He was right, of course. Foam lobsters trapped in car doors weren't so weird. Her relationship with her brother, now that was weird, as well as strained, pained and a thousand other adjectives.

***

The sandwiches were overcooked and the onion rings slimy and raw, but still, lunch was amazing. Dawn remained easy to talk to and fun to be with, the perfect date. The morning had been difficult for Jeff and the evening would be excruciating, but for one little hour, crammed into a tiny booth at the Maine Street Diner, everything felt perfect.

Dawn finished the last bite of her grilled cheese sandwich and chased it down with a long swig from a chocolate-malt milkshake. She opened her mouth and released a very long, throaty burp. He snatched an onion ring from his plate and pitched it at her. The ring bounced off her chest, leaving a spot of grease and a scattering of crumbs on the snug t-shirt. "That wasn't very ladylike," he said.

"I know." Her long fingernails swept the crumbs from the shirt. "Roger hates it when I burp. He thinks it's disgusting." Jeff wondered how anyone could ever find anything about his kid sister disgusting. She cupped her hand to the side of her mouth and whispered conspiratorially, "He has major problems with bodily functions."

"Then he should never visit a locker room." Dawn giggled at his words for a moment. Jeff handed her an onion ring, which she popped in her mouth. "Don't you think it's weird that a doctor is afraid of a little burp?" he asked. "The guy dissected dead people in medical school."

"We all have our deep, dark secrets," few deeper or darker than the secret the Kramer siblings shared. "Steer clear of burps and farts and you'll see Roger is a really great guy."

"I guess he would have to be great," Jeff conceded, "to marry you." He sipped the last few drops of vanilla milkshake through a fat red straw. When it came to milkshakes, Jeff was normally a chocolate or strawberry kind of guy; at that moment, however, he felt inconsolably vanilla. "I think I'll get another," he said, rising from the booth.

"You've already had two." She cracked a smile. "Aren't you finely tuned athletes supposed to drink gross stuff, like raw eggs and wheat juice?"

"Football season started two weeks ago. With all the time I spend in the training room, I could drink a dozen of these things and not gain a pound." He exaggerated more than a little. A pro contract and the modest amount of money that came with it had given Jeff the incentive to get in better shape, but he was still far from a gym rat. "I don't switch to the nasty stuff until the off-season." He made the trip to the counter, returning with a full glass. The hand-dipped vanilla milkshake was topped with a mountain of whipped cream and dark chocolate shavings. A plump maraschino cherry balanced on top of it all.

Dawn grabbed the cherry by the woody stem and sucked the fruit in her mouth. "That was a switch," she said. "Usually, it's you who takes the cherries." Her chocolate stained lips parted in a sad smile, an understanding smile. "Jeff, are you..." She trailed off. She sipped her malt then took a breath for courage. She tried again. "Are you alone?" At first, Jeff ignored the question. He finished the last of the onion rings then picked the greasy crumbs from the plate. He couldn't ignore her forever. "Are you?"

"No," he admitted, "not alone very often, I mean."

"I'm glad you're still breaking hearts."

Breaking hearts, that was the old Jeff. The new Jeff never lacked for company but it was always a one-night stand, two at the most, and only with the type of girl who didn't expect a phone call the next day. He stayed away from nice girls. A nice girl had brokenhis heart.

"The nights get pretty cold up in Calgary, and beautiful women make great bed warmers."

Dawn dabbed at her lips with a brown paper napkin. A bit of red tinted her freckled cheeks.Jealousy? He hoped so. "Is that why you never came home; because you were too busy with your whores?"Definitely jealousy.

"I didn't want to stay away. Hell, I didn't want to leave in the first place. You're the one who stopped loving me!" Unchecked emotions forced his voice louder than intended. Every eye in the diner fell on their table.

She used a clean napkin to catch a tear. "You have no idea how much I missed you. Thanksgiving, Christmas, our birthdays, I prayed you would come home. I waited by the phone, sometimes for hours. You never called, not once. There were so many times when I needed my big brother." She wanted to say more, but it seemed difficult. "I never stopped, Jeff...I never stopped loving you."

She fled the diner before he could even consider a response. Jeff deposited a twenty dollar bill on the dirty table (he hoped the money would cover the check) and hurried after her. He chased his kid sister down Maine Street. She was quicker than he remembered, but his long strides chipped away at the distance. He called out as she dashed across 12th Street. In his haste, Jeff ignored the traffic light. "Don't Walk" flashed in dull red letters. Brakes screeched and horns honked as he darted across the busy street. His peripheral vision caught a flash of forest green. An enormous Land Rover skidded to a halt just inches before it slammed into his torso. Jeff tripped over the curb, landing with a thud on the pitted sidewalk. The driver of the Land Rover shut off her cell phone and added her shrill voice to the chorus of horns.

Dawn reached for him. "Are you trying to get yourself killed?" She took him by the arm and led him as far from the street as possible. She pressed him against the red brick façade of the National Bank building, where she examined his hands and his face. "Only a few scrapes," she said. The skin on his palms stung like hell from bracing himself in the fall, but he'd live.

She brought his hands to her lips and lightly kissed each palm. As the pain melted so did his heart. Two precious dimples accompanied Dawn's equally precious smile. Trapped heat radiated from the dark red bricks, warming his back. Dawn pressed close to his front, radiating heat of her own. He touched her neck and her face. She was just as soft as he remembered.

Beads of moisture formed amongst the freckles on her cheeks. She turned pinker with each touch. By the time she closed her eyes, her breath had grown as harried as his.

She knew. They both knew. The kiss was unavoidable.

He leaned close, tasting her soft lips for the first time in so long. Her protest consisted of a nasally squeak and a feeble attempt to push away. Kissing Dawn had to be the only thing more exhilarating than being with Dawn. To passersby they were a painfully normal couple expressing their painfully normal love on a city sidewalk. Despite its obvious wrongness, having her in his arms in front of so many people felt so right he could hardly stand it.

Her hands roamed his back, exploring the muscles acquired since their last intimate encounter. "Jeff, we can't do this." The kiss ended, but he continued to caress Dawn's freckled cheek. "We can't. Please stop."

"I can't stop," he said, kissing the crook of her neck.

"You could if you loved me enough."

That was a rotten thing to say. He did love her, more than anything in the world. This time it was Jeff who fled. He had nowhere to go except back to Elmwood Lane, back to Dawn's pink station wagon, so that's where he ran. Dawn looked redder than usual when she caught up. Her shirt had darkened under the arms; she looked sticky and sweaty. "Jeff, why---"

"I can't stay. I look at you and...and..." His words were clumsy. "I feel like I'm losing you all over. I can't bear it, not again." He wanted to retreat to the hotel to gather his luggage then hop the next flight to Calgary. He placed his palms on the hood of the car. The cruel metal stung his skin, so he pulled away.

"Please, don't leave." She took one of his enormous hands with both of hers. "I still need you. I'll always need my big brother."

That's why he couldn't stay. A year ago, when she looked him in the eyes and told him she didn't love him, it was the end of the big brother and the birth of the ex-lover. Any pretense that he'd returned to support Dawn evaporated like smoke. He would do anything to ruin the wedding. Why else would he have returned? He couldn't be trusted; leaving was the only option.

She must have sensed his eagerness to escape. Dawn wrapped her arms around his back and held on for the longest time, wordlessly begging him to stay.

"I'll try," he said, his voice absent of promise. He helped her dry her tears before accepting a silent ride to his hotel.

To be continued...

I hope you liked this first chapter of Light of Dusk. Three more chapters will follow in daily intervals. Please feel free to vote and/or leave feedback. Your opinions are my only reward.