by DarkSammael
I know I am overthinking this story. I am forced to go back to my psychiatric medical text books. Actions of the mother appear to reflect those of a person with bipolar disorder superimposed with a sadistric personality. It is rare that this type person can maintain a marriage for 19 years, have children and not physically destroy one or all persons in the famiky unit. The son appears to have a dominant personality which has been so often emotionally and psychologically attacked over the years that he has almost no self-awareness, self-confidence nor ego. When he has finally had enough that he unleashes on his mother or leaves her. Either way, psychologically, there will be nothing left of herbut a physical shell. This is a most interesting story. 5 stars.
Why is it always the anonymous critics that write the most scathing comments. If I were the writer I would ignore their stupid remarks. It is a good story and I am looking forward to more chapters.
I enjoy the story very much I'm sure it will all be revealed sooner or later. I just want it sooner than later. New chapters please
I'm not going to give you any suggestions because you are the author and I'm not going to critique until I have read the finished story.
But I will say this.....Finish the goddamn story!!!!!!!
I get the comments about there being no big progression in the chapter, but I still admire and am interested by your writing. As you seem to be focusing a lot on characterization at this point, I get it.
I'm wondering if the key opens up the mother's private downstairs, but I guess I'll have to be patient :) The mother is a highly fascinating character. Looking forward to more explanation about what makes her tick.
definitely keeping me interested i rated it 5/5 for suspense keeps the reader coming back for more. true that 3 and 4 are similar but still can't wait for chapt 5 :)
Am disappointed with the story line. Agreed with a previous comment, chapter 3 and 4 very similar and are moving no where. No explanation of Nazi articles, the son never tries to get into his mother's room downstairs (that certainly not normal), love/hate relationship between mother and son and no explanation. Why hasn't the son raped his mother? She sure deserved it and needs to have someone dominate her. Need to add probably several chapters to clarify all the story that you left out.
The next chapter will explain a lot---probably not to everyone's satisfaction, but it will be something. And the sex is actually in the next chapter. And the one after that. So, if things go according to plan, we end on chapter 6.
And to respond to a couple comments, thank you for the feedback. It's hard for me to tell when I'm rehashing things; I don't have an editor, which probably doesn't help matters. I definitely should have had 3/4 as one chapter, in retrospect. And if I ever get in the mood, I will try to cut out some of the more repetitive parts to take away some of the drag. For now, I'll just be happy if I can complete it.
---The author
This feels like a variation of chapter three. The story is not advancing. It's akin to a high performance car mired in a mudslick spinning it's wheels to no discernible result. Mom's a cunt . Son is frustrated. The dueling nature of embittered, eloquent dialogue has been noted & admired .
Enough words. It's time for some action on one level or another. Real action. The masturbation bit is penny ante. It doesn't have to be carnal, but it has to be something.
cliffhanger deluxe again! i cant wait the read the next chapter. hope there is plenty more to come. i like the unusualness of your story.
this IS realy something different!
btw you are a realy talented writer.
thanks for letting us part of your fantasies!
keep it up, 5 stars from me.
Bipolar - Sociopathic - Bitch
Theres medication's for the first one
Therapy for the second
But the third one, sorry that's terminal....
still nothing much makes sense, just hope it will all be made clear in next chapter which i hope is coming ASAP