Lux Ex Tenebris

Clearly I had never been with any man before, that to say I was still a virgin, but it wasn't me to not be able to say something to any guy, particularly to this guy despite the no talk rule. I blamed it on the weird custom, on his intimidating figure and on this strange kingdom, but deep down inside I knew it was his masculinity that robbed me off my speech and my composure. Two maids came in to take the dishes away and I got up and walked out to the balcony. Sitting down on a chair I looked up to the sky and gazed at the stars. The wind blew quite strong as I was high up there above the ground. Embracing myself and rubbing my arms with my hands I looked to the left and saw a figure on another balcony. I noticed it was the King himself. I couldn't see his face clearly as there was a distance between the balconies but I could see that he was looking at me. I couldn't break our gaze and kept staring at him in awe. Suddenly he expanded his wings and jumped off the balcony that made me gasp before soaring high up in the sky and out of my sight. I forgot that he could fly.

***

Although I had been here for over a month and I still felt alienated except from my daily encounter with Lorant I had become accustomed to the routine that I actually found comfort in it. I hadn't roamed the ground yet but I had made the library as my sanctuary. Upon my finding of papers and charcoals in the desk drawers I started to sketch and began to write on the small notebook Lorant had given me not long ago. Dinner time had become something that wasn't unnerving anymore that I actually looked forward to it as I enjoyed the company of the King despite the lack of word exchange between us. Each evening I could feel the King wasn't as stiff as he was and he actually relaxed and leaned down to me when I fed him. Nevertheless tonight was different.

I fed him with the usual ease and grace when I noticed there was a little bit of sauce left in the corner of his lips. Without thinking I wiped it with my thumb and brought it to my lips to lick it off and continued with my routine. I brought the last piece of meat to my mouth and accidentally smeared my lips with the sauce. Before I got the chance to grab a napkin he took his hand to my face and wiped the sauce off with his thumb and brought it to his mouth, copying my gesture. I looked at him in astonishment and smiled at him. To my surprise he twitched the corners of his lips of what I assumed as a smile and his gaze warm at me. I felt my cheeks flushed and busied myself with filling a plate with fruits. He took a bite of a piece of pear from my hand and once more to my surprise he took a grape from the plate and brought it up to my lips. I looked at him in amazement. He waited patiently for me to and I finally opened my mouth let him put the grape in. We actually started feeding each other. I didn't know what to make of it but it was quite a progress. A progress that made my heart race. When he left and after the maids cleared the dishes and took the table away I jumped into the bed and let out a giggle. I had never been happier although I knew it was still a long way for him to speak to me.

Later that night I woke up from my sleep and couldn't go back to it. After tossing and turning around I decided to go to the library. After donning a robe I opened the door and the guards stopped me. I told them I was going to the library and one of them walked with me on the torch lit corridor and went with me inside the library to light up the chandeliers before going out and standing outside the door. I grudgingly closed the door behind as I felt like a prisoner and went down the spiral staircase. I sat down on the nook and began to relax when I started to read. It only felt like a second when the door opened and the guard flew down and stood not far from me. Bowing at me he said,

"Your Majesty wishes you to see him in his study room."

I looked at him in surprise as this was the King's first request ever. I stood up and was about to make my way when he continued,

"You may bring your book."

I grabbed my book when he flew to the door and waited for me. I followed him to a door that I always passed not far from my room but I never found out what it was until tonight. The guard knocked on the door twice and opened the door. It was the King's study room. He was sitting behind a large desk holding a piece of paper in his hand. The guard closed the door behind me and the King motioned me to come forward. Nervously I walked towards him and stood on the other side of the desk. He looked at me and his expression was unreadable.

"I was informed you were at the library this late at night."

He actually spoke to me! I slowly nodded,

"Yes I was. I couldn't sleep and I thought to read in the library,"

"I disapprove of you going to the library late at night. If you wish to read this late, you may do it here in my presence."

I gawked at him. He continued,

"You may take a seat and read."

He waited until I seated myself on a chair before returning his attention back to the paper he was holding. I opened the book and tried to read but my eyes only lingered on the same line while my mind and heart were racing at the thought of the man who was sitting in front of me. I glanced at him who was concentrating on whatever he was reading and couldn't help but thinking how it would feel to be in his arms. I let my mind wander at things I never thought before and quickly returned my gaze to the book when he shot a glance at me. The awkward pressure from being in the same room with him began to bother me that I had to excuse myself to retreat back to my room.

"Leave the book here,"

He ordered. I stood up and placed the book on the desk. Walking to the door I could feel his gaze on me and I braced myself to take a quick glance at him before closing the door and making my way back to the room with the guard walking in front of me. Lying down on bed I thought of the ways to spend more time with him other than dinner time, and to actually get to know him.

I didn't have to wait for too long because after dinner on the next evening he sent one of the guards to fetch me to his study room. Walking towards him I noticed there was a wooden screen placed before a tall window in the left corner of the room. He motioned me to take a look and I found the window nook was cushioned for comfort. There were a few colorful bolsters and cushions and my book was on top of a pillow covered in moss green sheet. There was a peach colored blanket throw neatly folded next to the pillow. The wooden screen was there for privacy so no one could see what was behind it and only the King himself who could, given the fact that his desk was only a few feet away from it. All in all the nook looked really cozy. I turned around to him, who was still sitting down on his chair, and smiled widely at him,

"Thank you my Lord, I liked it!"

He nodded at me and went back to his work. I settled down and made myself comfortable. After covering myself to my waist with the throw I opened the book on the page where I left and started reading. Trying to read would probably be the best description of what I was doing since I couldn't help stealing a glance at him every now and then. I was aware of the no talk rule but I wanted so badly to talk to him so my mind was working on some things appropriate to say. Since I couldn't come up with anything, being within his proximity was good enough for me. For now. At least he allowed me to be near him despite Lorant's warning that the King didn't like to be surrounded with people unless it was necessary. But I wasn't just people, I was only me and there was only one me so I was sure I wouldn't overwhelm him. I comforted myself with that thought and focused on the book.

***

I woke up slowly and felt the sunlight on my skin. I turned around on my back and stretched when realization hit me: I was in the King's study room last night and I didn't remember going back to my room. He must've carried me himself to the bed. I blushed at the thought of that. I got up and made my way to the bathroom when Marsila entered the room. She nodded at me before busying herself with her usual chore: picking the dress for me to wear. After taking a shower and donning the dress I went on my usual business; talking to Lorant and spending my time in the library. Sitting on the nook I paused myself from reading and looked out the window. The weather was nice and I decided it was time for me to venture the garden. I took my sketch book and a charcoal and walked out of the library. I asked the guards to show me the garden and they looked at me strangely before obliging to my request. I followed them going through a series of staircase and I was finally out of the castle. I looked up the looming castle and realized that it was really huge, and my only venture between my room, the library and the King's study room was nothing considering there was a lot to explore.

Walking on the gravel path I took a deep breathe of the fresh air and followed the guards who were walking instead of flying since I couldn't fly and it was nice of them to actually respect that. There were hardly any flowers around since Tenebrians weren't into such thing, but the vast garden was well kept and the trees were decorated with their own fruits that were waiting to be harvested. We stopped at a gazebo and the guards stood on the path. Their guarding stance, standing up and not move a muscle, was beyond my comprehension and never failed to amuse me. I sat down on a chair and stared at the trees, thinking of what to sketch. Shifting on my chair I decided to make a sketch of the guards. I wasn't aware that I spent hours out in the garden when one of the guards finally moved to inform me that it was time to go back inside. I looked at the sky and realized it was almost dark. I followed them and almost ran out of breathe when I finally reached my room as it was a long way to go up there. Marsila was waiting for me with disapproval on her face but said nothing as I went to do my usual routine before dinner time.

Sitting down on the sofa while waiting for the King I realized that the bun Marsila had done was too tight. It was unbearable I began to get headache from it that I had to go into the walk-in closet and took all the pins away. I was braiding my hair when I heard the door opened and I quickly finished tying it and hurried to the King who was already sitting down. He raised his eyebrows at me but I wasn't sure if it was because he didn't find me waiting for him or for me letting my hair down in a braid instead of the usual bun. I sat next to him and began to fill the plate when I heard him asking,

"How was the garden?"

I paused momentarily from taking a bread and asked,

"How did you know?"

"Nothing is out of my watch, my Lady."

I smiled at him calling me 'my Lady' although he probably meant nothing by it. Still it brought a warm feeling to my heart as it was the first time he actually called me. Setting the plate on my lap and feeding him with my hand I answered,

"The garden was beautiful although there was no flower. The fruits on the trees, however, looked so exquisite I was actually tempted to grab one of them."

I realized I was blabbing and I bit my tongue. He fed me a piece of meat and cheese folded in the bread and responded,

"You should've taken one. Make sure you avoid the black fruits, the spikes are poisonous. Have one of the guard removed them if you wish to eat it."

His response encouraged me to speak more,

"You don't mind me venturing around the garden?"

"No, I don't. However you must stay away from the woods,"

"Why?"

"It's not safe."

I waited for his explanation but he didn't say anything more so I nodded and we continued eating in comfortable silence. When we were done I filled another plate with fruits and we fed each other again. Knowing him, although only a little of it, I could sense that he was about to say something. Putting a grape in my mouth he said,

"I'm leaving tonight."

I held myself from asking but I couldn't help,

"Leaving to where?"

He looked at me, clearly not going to answer that. I gulped and encouraged myself to ask again,

"For how long, my Lord?"

"3 days, at least."

I looked down at the plate. The thought of not having him around was too much especially not knowing where he was going and what he was doing. I was aware the bond between us was still fragile yet I felt like there was a knot in my stomach being pulled and I missed him already. When the plate was empty he stood up and proceeded to the door.

"My Lord,"

I heard myself calling him. He stopped and turned around to look at me. I got up and walked towards him. When I stood in front of him I lost my nerves to say what I was about to say. He patiently waited for me. Inhaling deeply I touched the back of his hand with my fingers and whispered,

"Please be careful."

He didn't say anything, probably was surprised of my bold gesture. I was hoping for the worst when he lifted my chin up with his fingers. He slowly leaned down and stopped. Resting his forehead against mine his lips were hovering over my lips. To hell with this, I thought to myself and made my own move. I softly pressed my lips on his. I could sense his surprise but he didn't bulge. He then returned my kiss softly and slowly yet it was brief. He pulled away and caressed my head,

"Read in my study room."

After a moment he added,

"Wait for me."

He turned around without waiting for my response and walked out the door. I felt tears began to develop so I walked out to the balcony, not wanting the maids to see me in such condition. After a few minutes I saw a few figures flying to the dark night and I felt tears ran on my cheeks. I was in love with the King and I didn't know how to express it to him nor how he would react to that. I felt so lonely because he had to leave at the moment when we actually began to open up to one another. I wiped my tears unladylike and thought of what I would say to him when he returned.

***

It had been a week since he left and the first 3 days were the hardest because I missed him so much and it was eating me from the inside. Lorant knew I was brooding over his absence but he didn't say a word about it. Instead he encouraged me to pick up my sword hobby that I had abandoned ever since I got to Tenebris. So I put my sword skills into practice and my guards, Bastian and Lucien, took turn in being my sparring partner. They soon became friendly towards me after I showed them my skills and eagerness in learning new tricks and accepting advises. We used one of the spare chambers in the same floor of my room so I didn't have to go up and down the stairs. I introduced them to fencing that was entirely new to them and quickly became fond of it.

I was thrusting my foil at Bastian's chest when Marsila walked in and announced that the King had returned. Taking my mask off and holding myself from squealing like an idiot I asked of the King's whereabouts. Not taking her eyes off the foil I was holding Marsila answered that the King was in his study and would join me for dinner. Without minding courtesy or whatsoever I dashed out of the room and stopped at the door of the King's study room, debating with myself if I should enter or not. The guards looked at me quizzically and I made up my mind and ran to my room to clean myself. I couldn't take a shower and wash my long hair quick enough.

I put a robe on and walked out of the bathroom while drying my hair with a towel when I saw him standing near the chest in front of the bed where I put my sketch book on. He was looking at my sketches when he looked up at me. Whatever that he was about to say was gone and I could see his guarded gaze roaming around my body. I was too happy to see him that I forgot all about modesty, and all the rules that had been drilled into my head went to the garbage bin along with the towel I was using to dry my hair with to the floor. I ran to him and hugged him tight. I quickly pulled away from him,

"I'm sorry my Lord, it's just... It's just... I'm just glad you're back."

I bit my lower lip and couldn't bring myself to look at him. He then lifted my chin up and kissed my lips slowly that soon turned into a passionate one. He pulled the loose tie on the front of my robe that the robe slid down to the floor while still kissing me. Picking me up in his arms he brought me around and lied me down in bed. I was so self conscious of my nakedness but I wanted him so bad that I shoved my embarrassment away. I saw his clothes disappeared and I gawked at him in surprise. But before I could ask him about it his muscular body was already on top of me and he continued kissing me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and let his tongue explore my mouth before caressing it with mine. I ran my hands on his back and along the frame of his wings as far as my hands could reach. He cradled my head with one of his hands, and his other one caressed the side of my body.

I arched my body towards him in need when his mouth ventured down to my neck, lightly nibbled on it before proceeding to my breasts. He cupped one of my breasts in his hand that filled it perfectly when his tongue teased the other one that made my nipple hard before put it into his mouth and sucked it. He moved to the other breast and gave it the same treatment when I felt his hand snaked down to between my thighs. Involuntarily I clamped my thighs and he kissed down to my stomach and kissed down some more to my lower belly. I felt my cheeks burning with need and at his intimacy. He then moved up, back to ravishing my lips. When I began to relax he slowly parted my legs with his and before I realized it he was already in between my legs, kissing the inside of each of my thighs and slowly made his way to my sex.

He caressed along my glistening sex with his tongue and kept doing that for some time before clamping his lips on my throbbing bud and sucking on it, making me scream his name and throwing me to the edge of ecstasy. I gripped the sheet underneath and moaned out loud when he slowly inserted a finger into the delicate flesh without stopping sucking on my bud. He flicked his tongue on it while moving his finger in and out and took it out completely right before I reached my climax. Frustrated, I thrusted my hips upward, begging him to finish what he started. He went back to my lips to kiss me and I could taste myself mixed with his own saliva. It was intoxicating. He rubbed the head of his sex along my wet slit and slowly nudged it in. His was so thick and long and it stretched my virgin sex that even his effort in doing it slowly still caused me pain that was mixed with pleasure. I dug my fingers deep in his shoulders when he pushed in and stopped. I coarsely whispered,

"Is it in?"

He looked amused and kissed my lips deeply,

"Only half of it."

I closed my eyes and bit my lower lip.

"Look at me, Clara."

I opened my eyes at his command and him calling my name, and held his burning gaze with mine when he thrusted himself forward that caused me to scream. He buried his face in my neck and held still inside me while trying to control his breathe. He then kissed my lips and looked me in the eye when he began to move slowly. The feeling of him inside me was strange yet the pleasure was beyond words as he filled me perfectly. Holding my face in his hands he couldn't tear his gaze of mine just as I couldn't do the same either. He increased his pace and sent me to my climax that was too much for me to bear before he reached his.

Afterward he rolled our joined bodies to our sides. He wrapped his arms around me and slowly ran a hand down my back before running it back up. I smiled against his chest. My cold blooded husband apparently wasn't as cold as what the people said. He scrolled his fingers into my hair and pulled it down so I could look at him and whispered,