All Comments on 'Magnetism'

Overwrought prose; bitchy, demanding woman; weak, unconfident, apologetic man.

You write like a sexually and emotionally immature 12 year old.

If you think women are strong and know things and you are weak, prone to do the wrong thing, and don't understand or see things right, that's either just immaturity that can be grown out of, or a psychological issue that can be treated. It's neither normal nor healthy. If you are indeed 12, then don't worry about it, you'll get over it, but if you are 20+, get help.

The number of words visible on the page at any one time was a little annoying. I guess I could turn the font down from the default, but then I'd complain about that. You tease with the idea that it's happened before, but I think you tease too much without ever letting anyone else in on the joke. I guess when you're talking about infinities like spontaneous universe existence, accepting that these atoms were in a similar form attracted to each other before is really a given. Why not. Oh right, most stories accept the universe as it is, since why and how generally means little in a romance. From here on, there may be gross exaggeration and unwarranted extrapolation to properly equip this commentator to comment within the mythos of the story.

There are some parts of the premises presented that are entertaining, but I agree with that other person who commented regarding that Loving Wives should not be used to model characters, but flaws are fine if they cooperate with the plot...here, it was sort of a plot device to allow the male lead to be a cork tack board. Not pin cushion levels, but that's taking the path to the dark side. You've crossed over to the dark side where idiot, dummy, stupid, or even murder is involved with thought or action.

If you're going to use quantum entanglement to justify things, I'll just point out that the only memorable instance was her winning a bet on him. Generally, entangled things can be manipulated by powers other than femininity. There's no exploration of using it for his advantage that I remember, and I may be senile, but that's no reason I can't remember two things if they were equally memorable.

Nevertheless, the little paragraph about their union as an atomic metaphor was great. Too bad that is under 750 words. Taking care of her could have been used better in a more developed story. Obviously, theses people are not typical, and I understand all too well about her research insanity, and it's not fun because it's not elective or selective, but the alternative is even more useless.

usual literotica mangle. Imaginative, but with some weird fucking spelling.