All Comments on 'Maui Vacation with Tina'

00-Terrble.

sounds to me like a follow-up might be needed .the 3 of them might decide to live together. and explore where their relationship goes.

I hope she can get an antibotic for it.<br><br>

Or did you mean "orgasm"?

Love it, very hot, need a little more detalis in the sex part. But hot.

First off, it's ORGASM not 'organism'. We're all organisms but only women can have orgasms; if a guy's lucky, he might have 2 then he's done for at least for a few hours if not the day.

she would have an organism.

I've lost track of how many stories I have read where the writer doesn't seem to know how to spell orgasm and uses organism

Sorry Balmain. I usually really get into SIL stories but you lost me simply by misspelling a word. Now had it been some obscure word, I might have soldiered on. But "orgasm"!?!!! Haven't you noticed how it's spelled in the thousands of stories on Literotica? It's like a woman that farts in your face when you're down on her... it's hard to get back into it. Get an editor and keep at it: a man of you age surely has a million stories to tell!

If you have a couple from the midwest, you should know that the term is 'Ass' and not 'Arse.' The only arse is Gordon Brown, but that's another story entirely. The word 'Arse' is such a crude term that is both awkward as well as evil sounding. Y-fronts are equally bad. Other than that, a good story, but please, learn your market.

Deserves a part TWO

Loved the story. Most of the writing was technically good, too, except for a few homophones and many glaring spelling errors. Please keep writing, but let an editor help you!

after all the great build up, we readers deserved a properly detailed sex scene with Tina, not the rush job we got.

I love this story and have read it a couple of time. I would love read a follow up story.

Sometimes a few too many "smart remarks & comebacks." Your writing is fresh and funny, just don't sacrifice sexy for funny. A little hard to believe that a sister would let her sister "play" openly with her husband. Nice fantasy, but would almost never happen in real life. Oh well, that's why it's fiction. Haha. Still a lot of fun to read. Would have loved the description of deep penetration of Tina. You missed a good opportunity ! Weak ending. Did u get tired of writing ? A 5 anyway. Keep writing. Improve your already exceptional talent.😊

I felt like I was there, your story drew a picture of a pleasant vacation with many good times.

What a very sexy, and perfect opportunity! YUM!

story was good but disappointed by the rushed ending and lack of sex scene. so much build up to be let down and get nothing!