All Comments on 'Motel Meeting'

just for the poor choice of second person (you). This is not just an amateurs mistake; it is terrible writing. Go back and edit this into first person or third. And never do this again.

2 stars

You think and then you type and you are having fun. You do it all in second person and present tense. Your readers, both of them, say WTF?

love the sex!!!

Badly conceived and especially poorly delivered in an impossible second tense. You really need either a good editor or a great proof reader. A poor story choice that was impossible to read. "1".

Ditto on the second person. Almost impossible for a new writer (I assume you are new since most of us learn with experience.) Don't give up.

Really it was.

Great story. Would have better if it had been told by on of them. Keep writing!

I hope you get the message. Reading a story in the second person puts my teeth on edge, so I don't.

That was a totally nasty little fable.

A stranger in the room with you and your husband.

Two gay men and a straight woman....she must be planning on doing Sudoku or her nails.