All Comments on 'Mother's Day Weekend in Las Vegas'

Good story. I do have problems with mothers that supposedly start with the garbage mouth as soon as they give in. Remember, it is her son, her baby and most mothers would not talk like that especially the first time they made love with him.

The biggest problem with the story is that when you win big money in Vegas, you don't get to keep all the money. The different levels of government take their cut immediately. The casinos deduct the government's share and you get the rest. Simple editting would correct this problem.

Never mind the Vegas comments made, just keep your wonderful story as is. I hope he gets her pregnant and become a couple, incest romance is the best.

Agree that some simple editing would have made the story better, but I loved your story line and this genre in general. My own personal fetish, Laura would have had black thigh highs & a garter belt on with that beautiful dress. Had a woman written this, I would have expected some detail about the make up, nails and spa treatment that we guys seldom can relate to. But overall, I gave you a 5. I love the background and build up to the sex. You did a great job!

Oz

I thoroughly enjoyed the story. I really liked the buildup. It made the story more enjoyable. There were a few spelling errors, like using to instead of too, but that happens. As for the comments about the mother's coarse language happening so quickly, I think once a woman steps across a forbidden barrier such as committing incest with her son, the good girl ideals tend to go out the window. Mother is gone, and a whore is born. Remember, it's your story. Write it the way YOU want to. I apologize for not signing in, but my account is having sign in problems that I hope tech support fixes soon. sawandsword.

This is a solid effort - I enjoyed your "A Hot Night With Mom" series, and I'm glad that your next mom-son is a much better.

However, a few things that do stick -

1) As someone already mentioned, the mother with her filthy mouth. No need for that IMO.

2) The incredible luck involved with all the casino winnings. I realized that it's a significant part of the plot, but still...

3) I found it hard to believe that the son would suddenly want to bed the mother, especially since he had no sexual thoughts about her while he was growing up, or even when he left for college (4 years) or work (3 years). Maybe a little sexual tension between the two while growing up?

Also, I hope that the "to be continued" continues with the two remaining faithful to each other. Too often have authors tried to introduce new characters with disastrous results in my opinion.

Nevertheless, this is a great story. Don't be too bothered by my criticism. When I first read the story I found it great, it was only when I read the story again with a more critical eye that it all came up.

5 stars for writing.

i think i need to take a trip to vegas with my son ;-)

You have a hot one going, this could go a couple more chapters. It was a good read, Thank you.

To much luck in the casino, what as supposed to be a mothers gift now turned into hustle, it honestly a little immature to write this way also

There was so much build up for them to get to the point, you made a huge deal about the dress, the under garments, ect.... and then....? ....They just rip off the clothes and fuck? WTF

I find it hard to believe that he would know to get a purse shoes ect... I would think his mom would have to help him figure that one out.

Where did her sexual desire come from? They get to vegas and she is a whole new woman?

It is evident to me that you have little experience with Vegas. You just don't walk from one casino to another that easily. Decent story otherwise.

I like the story, but I feel like some things are too much of a leap. With that much build up, take the time to explore where desires and actions come from. Also, don't use the word 'sweet' so much.

Really enjoyed the story. I happen to really like mother-son scenarios. An editor can make a good story a great story. An example would be your winnings, you won 1250 then 700 then 900 then 5000 but each time you hoped to have enough for a nice meal or not go hungry. Inconsistent. You entered the room, got naked, went to the bed, then picked her up and took her to bed.

I am looking forward to the next chapter and hope it will be even better than the first!

Keep writing,

Daytymer

Hot start. Gave it a 4 instead of a 5 as the numerous spelling/grammar errors were too distracting. The other commenter was right, too, about the $100,000 payout. The taxes would have taken right off the top before he got his money.

hot hotter hottest story especially the sex i love rough sex especially mom son waiting for the next updates gave it a 5

HOT...HOT...HOT...HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sensual, sexy, passionate, loving....and HOT sex...more please!

What a great story . Loved the slow build up .Can't wait for the next part .

Great start! I really like the buildup. I'm giving it a four instead of a five because there was a number of spelling and grammar errors that were quite distracting. The 100,000 thing is a stretch, but it fit well with the story. Keep writing! I want more!

Sorry, but I could not give this five stars due to the errors, and the lack of taxes taken right at the time of pay-off. As for the errors -- Either learn to proofread (read it aloud to yourself as it appears, not as you think you wrote the story), or get a couple of the editors to read and make corrections before you submit the story. Looking forward to the next chapter, and hope that you take into consideration the advice.

I know can't wait for the continuation of this story. I really hope one is in the works

Sorry, your grammar and wrong word usage was the biggest turn-off for me. You went from singular to plural too many times, too often to excuse. You also seem to have trouble with two letter words by confusing 'too' with 'to,' again, too many times for my liking. And your story went from slow-start [admittedly, as you'd warned] to machine-gun quick. 'Wham-bam-thank-you-mam' doesn't do it for me I'm afraid; coupled with your fractured use of words, wrong words, and actual missing words. I doubt I'll be back to your page. 2 stars only

waiting for next part....

I liked it, don't really care about grammer or spelling. If I want that I go to somewhere there are "professional" editors not volunteers and then when I pay for the story I'll expect more. Don't let the grammer Nazis get you down and don't worry about the little English boys and their likes and dislikes. Not enough cuckolding in this for them, seems to be a way of life if their stories and comments are any indication. Oh well, whatever floats your boat. Would like to see the next part of this, good start for sure.

I read some more comments and I have to wonder.

Did anyone not notice that this is fiction? Just a story not a documentary about how to fuck your mother or how to get around in Vegas. Wow, I thought some of the comments in the Loving Wives category were ludicrous.

This even beats my own fantasies about a sexual relationship with my mother or one of my sisters. My favorite words were...To be continued.

...as someone else stated, except for the grammar errors here and there, it was a great read. That said, I would still get an editor to review your work.

Loved how she sucked him off but he thought it was a dream. This has promise. :)

I wouldn't even worry about the comments from those who have yet to submit a story. Most of the negative comments came from them. If they aren't brave enough to have to submit anything and have it critiqued, then their own criticism is not worth bothering about. That being said, I loved the story.

Your story line was very good and I battled through the many errors in the text to continue. It was a lovely slow build up but then ...

That final bedroom scene spoiled it for me. Gone was the subtle approach, gone was all the delicate development, gone was the tenderness: it descended into a quick and crude bang.

Before that final scene I thought that I would enjoy your second chapter, now I'm not so sure. I'm not going to vote on the story because I don't want to reduce your score. It would have been a 4 because of the errors in grammar and spelling etc. but that final scene would have reduced my vote to 2.

You have the talent as a story creator but please, please, please get a good editor.

And I love the passage where Shawn says, "I unleashed a load of cum that filled her to the brim then overflowed around my cock as it trickled down to the crack of her ass. It was the sexiest thing I have ever seen in my life." That has to be one of the very best, if not the best, things a son can ever see. His semen trickling out of his own mother's cunt, the cunt he's just fucked the living shit out of.

Unlike others, I try not to pick, pick, pick about spelling/grammar. What i look for in these stories is what is in my title. My title sums this story up for me. Except for excellent as well. And Btw, I loved it. 5*. -dave

Enjoyed the character development. The adoration, passion, and erotic sensual sensitivity between mother and son was beautifully developed. This is simply a truly romantic love story.

Beautiful sexy story. Can't wait for the next chapter.

5 stars it was wonderful

5 stars great story but if you think a thick 7 and 1/2 cock isn't anything special then what is?