All Comments on 'Mouse Bk. 04 Ch. 01'

I know it's your story, but I hope to god Melanie doesn't remember anything when she wakes up. What Michael and Mouse share is special and would be diminished if Melanie gets involved. A testament to your writing ability, that I care more about the characters then the eroticism. You truly have a gift :)

I have read alot of these brother/sister type stories, what ruins it for me is when they introduce a third party. Let Michael/Mouse continue with their love story and it is a hot one....

so far, i am glad. this story has been wonderful. i do hope, as the others have mentioned, that you keep this between them. i understand Mouse letting Melanie watch. she probably feels the need for their relationship to be accepted and understood, and that would be Melanie's role. I hope I don't read a threesome.

Great story so far (so great that you've made me post my first comment on a Literotica story). The rate at which you post new parts is great, too.

I also would like to voice my opinion and say I hope that Melanie stays away from any incestuous activity with Michael. Since this is an erotic story with REAL characters instead of fake nymphomaniac characters that just want to fuck 24/7, there would be too many issues with guilt, betrayal, and the effects on Melanie's marriage and her relationship with her kids. With the way you've set up things in the "Mouse World," it would no longer be a fun read.

Also, I hope you don't get Melanie's kids involved with either Mouse or Melanie (as much as I love mother-son stories). Which brings me to a question: just how many books do you have planned or think you will end up with?

Thanks again for the story.

A great continuation, and a realistic possibility (even if a bit unlikely...maybe?) for dynamic characters in a very unusual situation. I've definitely enjoyed the slow accumulation of complications upon what started as a typical incest fantasy (even if tremendously well-detailed, at that). *ahem* "More, please!"

I thot Mel was going 2 use the neck of that bottle while she watched Mouse & Micheal fuck as a kind of pseudo Micheal as a substitute for the real thing while she waited her turn. Her turn will come, SOON!

I'm certain you are a good enough writer to bring Melanie into the mix. Your stories could never be "typical", EVER! I'm on pins and needles waiting for the next installment! BRING IT! I'm ready!

Rob,

Again you have crafted a fine tale that should be held out as an example to those of us writing in this genre. It is tough to get the characters to do something that we have yet to read about or be in situations that have yet to be seen; however, your story lines continue to amaze this reader.

I eagerly await Bk 4 Ch2

I like the way you "innocently" introduced Melanie into the mix - having her watch. Sex scenes are sizzling...

This has been an excellent read, and the only thing not ringing true to me is Malanie's inclusion and reaction. The realism of the story is one of its most appealing aspects, you are a very talented writer (I checked Mouse out after reading The Shy One - truly outstanding eroticism!) However, it would ring truer to me if Mouse would slowly change and become more protective of herself and her brother now that she finally has him in a loving relationship. She has been developed as always being manipulative, but always with the ulterior motive of capturing him, and she should want to protect that at all costs, regardless of her need for risky behavior. Having Melanie watch and get dangerously close to participating doesn't ring true to me for either of the two women without an awful lot of character development for Melanie that we haven't seen, but you have hinted at - is that coming? Also, what happened to the 'don't come in me until we are married' rule? I was waiting for that to evolve to appropriately tricky, erotic and delicious fruition, not have Melanie thrown in prematurely! All in all, another great story - you have real talent for eroticism, keep it coming!

I started reading your story with one of your latest chapters. I was so enthralled that I went back to the beginning. Now I'm up to Book 4, and I'm stunned. I've never seen a story like this on this site, and I've been around a long time.

I can't believe what a wild slut Mouse is. I want to be her! And I can't believe she's lucky enough to have a brother like Michael (I'm not).

But please! don't let Melanie fuck things up. Keep her out of it. Leave Michael and Mouse alone and let them be happy. I mean, I'm sure Michael would like to try both of his sisters, but he belongs to Mouse, or at least, he should.

I can't wait to read the rest. But please give them a happy ending. PLEASE!

Keep reading people. This is one of the best stories on the site. Please do finish it. "Mouse" is well worth it.

This was one of the most erotic sex scenes I've ever seen described. I felt like I was there and I wish I had been. Cant wait to read the rest.

Such well written and thought out. I would recommend this that everyone interested in such things should start with this story.

I love how you added Melanie in! Wow! This is just fantastic, I hope we get to see more of Melanie as the book continues. I hope it never ends!

The twists and details in the story are just never ending! Keep up the good work.

OMG!!! I think we all knew that one day Melanie would know for certain. But....DAMN!!! in all the ways I imagined her discovering the truth.... never in my wildest dreams was as good as the way you wrote it!! (Nath)... once again. Thank you, thank you. Thank you.... for sharing your talent! now please excuse me, as there are many other chapters of this wonderfully erotic story to finish!

...and absolutely right for the personality dynamics you've established. Also, the sex keeps getting hotter and more intense. I'm tempted to say that's the case with every new sex scene and it may be true but the overall progression is definitely one where the dial gets turned up to what looks like the maximum and then turned up again soon thereafter.

The plot is amazing

pdf

nice to add another sis into the mix

I wish more stories on here were this long and this good.

This story is frustrating because it seems that Mouse changes her mind and emotions at the drop of a hat, she gets angry over nothing and then is happy at the same time, I'm surprised Michael isn't a nervous wreck.

Mouse is such a frustrating little slut. I love her!

It's not every author that can keep putting together one good story after another. I thought the introduction of Melanie to Mona's and Michael's secret opened up a lot of possibilities.