by buzltyr
I wanted to know a little more about the characters. Not much, just flesh them out a bit. But what I really wanted to know was what Mrs. Hansen looked like. I had nothing to go on, no way to picture her in my mind as I read the story.
Far too short in the description of "Mrs. Hanson". Also...why is she 40? Why can't she be 30 and of child-bearing age? A definite "00" at this point, but could be better.....
I liked the sex, but the others are right in thier comments about the characters. Especially the title character. Now at the time I write this I know there are more chapters, perhaps this will be corrected. About Mrs Hansens age, I don't find that a problem. Just FYI 40 isn't neccasarily beyond child bearing age. While unusual, pregnancies have occured into the 60's. Every woman 'clock' is different.
When start story no introduction - not even know if speaker is male or female. Awkward start and need not be.