Mrs McKenzie's Dude Ranch

Back at the homestead and drinking sparkling wine on the terrace, looking down on to the tranquil bay, Evelyn placed her hand on Sarah's shoulder and cooed, "Darling I can't remember when I last had so much fun. I had imagined it would be fairly static and boring. I was completely against yelling to stupid cattle to be back in line and became frustrated when I was ignored. So I included the word 'fuck' into my screaming and lo, back into line they ambled. It was unbelievable. A cow lumbered over Sophia and you went ass-over-tip in the creek and a cow licked your face. God I'll never forget that horrified look on your face."

Harry arrived with meatballs and salad for late lunch and then he took Daly off to teach him the fundamentals of archery while the three women got slowly drunk. It was another three hours before Sarah returned the press to the village.

While she was away Harry had rubbed liniment into Sophia's bruised thigh and then she decided she wanted more than her bruise rubbed.

All in all it was a great day.

Over dinner Sarah said, "I can't help worrying about Evelyn writing about those mess ups. She'll make it sound like we ran a cattle drive in utter chaos."

"Don't fret," Harry said. "In that case the presentation will rely on Daly's photos. He ran them through for me on this digital camera and I was blown away."

"But he's little more than a kid. How can he take good photos?"

"He received his first real camera for Christmas when he was seven and has been into photography ever since," Harry said. "That's why he takes great photos."

The all went across to the village on Wednesday morning to collect provisions but really to buy copies of the newspaper that began coming off the small press at 10:30.

Sophia left the coffee house at 10:25 and hurried back ten minutes later with ten copies.

"There is a picture of us on the front page," she said huskily and excitedly. "It points to the story about us on the center spread. It's all about us with no advertisements on those two pages.

"Omigod," Sarah said, hands shaking as she opened her copy of the center spread.

She screamed, "Omigod Sophia, it's you."

The picture was of Sophia, wiping mud off her curvaceous front and screaming at something, her face contorted and making her look like a fishwife... um a bad-tempered woman.

Another photo, taken by Harry, showed Daly on his bike in high-elevation with the startled cattle in the background looking at him and then another photo taken by Harry (posed and taken later) of Daly walking open-mouthed looking at the racks of bikes.

"Oh god no," screamed Sarah, making many of the coffee house patrons looking rather nervous. That photo showed a heifer licking the face of the water-soaked Sarah as she sat in the creek pulling her bike to her. Then there was a big picture of the strung-out herd with the outriders on bicycles on either side of them, photographed from a hilltop and then another one of cattle weaving through the woods.

"Mighty," Harry said.

They all began reading the story: "I'm forty-two, mother of two teenagers and I've just had the most memorable day's entertainment in recent memory, not visiting Disneyland but rather mounting a bike and hitting the trail the good old-fashion American way, herding young cattle that appear to respond to only one word in English and, ahem, that's the naughty F-word..."

"Omigod, where is this place. I just want to grab dad and the kids and get on out there," Sophia mimicked a hassled mom.

They all laughed and Sarah said it for them: "This is really great... and for us too."

The newspaper in Wichita next morning ran with Daly's photos but a reporter had interviewed Sarah, Sophia and Harry by phone the previous night to produce it's own story to go with the pictures and after buying full rights to the photographs had on-sold the illustrated story to a news agency for distribution to news media nationally and internationally.

Later that morning a TV crew arrived by chopper to do its impression of the cattle drive on bicycles for screening on network news that evening. A rival network affiliate called and was irritated it had been beaten to be first with the story.

"I'm sorry but listen Miss Mercer I'll let you talk to Harry Titter, he's our ideas man.

"Hi."

"Is your name really Harry Titter?"

"Yeah, almost as strange as Mercer isn't it. What's your first name honey?"

"Frankie."

"Is your name really Frankie Mercer?"

"Look I do apologize. I should be the last person to..."

"Forget it Frankie. Look Sarah said you have a chopper already warming up and a film crew on standby and your program will be running after your rival channel. Their team is just about to leave. Is that correct your station will not screen your program before they screen theirs?"

"Yes."

"Well come on here and we'll give you a little coup."

"There is considerable money involved. You'll have to tell me Harry."

"Okay, how about filming from the air a scout troop in uniform and on BMX bikes driving our cattle along. They are Angus cattle that don't scare easy and provided you pilot come no closer than 150 feet I reckon they will hold their line. I could ride with the pilot over the cattle in their holding pasture a few times to get them used to the noisy machine."

"You mean genuine scouts?"

"Yes."

"Right you're on. We'll be there in ninety-minutes. Sarah has given me the GPS reading."

Harry called Daly who said he'd round up the twenty Scouts required after school....

"I want them over here within an hour Daly."

"There is no way..."

"Tell your former high school principal this will be on national TV tonight and the name of the school and the name of the Scout troop will be mentioned on TV."

"That could interest him but I'm afraid..."

"Tell him we'll have an Open Day here on the island for the high school, kids, teachers and parents."

"He'll go for that. The education authorities will admire him for his enterprise."

"Go to it pal. Sarah will pick you guys up at the Council's launch."

Sarah's mouth fell open.

"But I have to requisition the launch a minimum of five working days in advance of requirement."

"Do you know the city manager's wife?"

"Yes I went to school with her."

"Well then Sarah, chop-chop. You know what to do."

Sophia asked what she could do to help.

"Thanks sweetheart. Get on the phone and get 48 cans of drink and enough lunch for twenty hungry teenage boys and us. The TV crew will be self-catering. You best go down to the launch with your mother and make sure your suppliers deliver everything you ordered and on time."

"Yes sir, I'm on my way to carry out orders sir."

"Okay and make sure your tits don't flop out when you're riding and telling the kids what to do. They are at an impressionable age."

"Yes sir. Understood. No tits are to fly in the sky sir."

* * *

The assistant director Frankie, who looked about nineteen, perhaps twenty, made a beeline for Harry as soon as the big chopper landed.

He kissed her.

She gaped and turned and her boss, a woman in her mid forties, yelled, "Don't molest the farm hand you over-sexed young woman. Find Mr Titter."

"This is Mr Titter Maria. Come and kiss him."

"He's wanted in the helicopter cabin right now. Come on. You better go with him. Where are the Scouts?"

"In the barn choosing their bikes Maria."

"Thanks Mr Titter. Hurry along now. You ride with him Frankie and note the terrain and features where we could set up remote ground cameras. Please don't maul Mr Titter when you get out of my sight."

"Sorry I landed you in it Frankie."

"It's fine. Her husband has been away for two weeks and she's... well you know. Perhaps you...?"

"Do my a favor Frankie and don't mention Maria to me in that context again. I'm having it off with the boss's daughter."

"God you lucky man. She's gorgeous judging by the photos in this morning's newspaper."

The pilot circled the cattle and gradually dropped lower and then tried a power sweep.

"Pull off to your left, they're about to stampede," Harry yelled.

The pilot swooped left and climbed and when they turned they say the cattle bunched by the far fence but they appeared reasonably calm.

"The two camera guys would want to get in close like that for realism." Frankie said, sounded disappointed. "We may as well shoot on the ground."

"No wait."

Harry directed the pilot down over the woods to a pasture at the far end of the 50-acre block.

"Do the same approach with these critters but don't do anything they're not expecting and they should be okay. Llamas are highly intelligent."

"I'll do as you say," said the pilot.

The maneuvers were completed successfully, including hovers just above ground level. The llamas moved away and stood look watchful but curiously.

"This is great, Frankie said. "We can say you'll conduct the llamas drive for parents with small children and grandparents who don't wish to ride bikes over rough terrain."

"Well yes, great idea Frankie. Give me another kiss."

The llamas drive was a great success. They had become used to Sarah walking in front of them when moving them, so she rode at the head and they just followed in a column and the outriders only had to pretend they were being useful. However to give filming balance the Scouts drove the cattle into the woods for filming by ground cameras and when returning the chopper swooped over them and started a bit of a stampede that had the Scouts working hard to control the herd.

Daly and Harry rode like crazy to the head of the drive and managed to wheel the leaders to stop them plowing into a fence.

It was all good fun.

Everyone sat on the grass near the barn for late lunch and then Maria, Frankie and the senior cameraman and the lighting and sound guy set up an interview area in the barn against the backdrop of bicycles.

The chopper then returned the other two cameramen and equipment no longer required to the TV studio and would later come back with the interviewer.

Sarah and Sophia prepared to take Daly and his troop and the empty food crates and refused back to the village. When Maria said she'd like to go on the boat ride to the village Sarah suggested Harry take Frankie on a bike ride round the island. When kissing Harry goodbye Sophia whispered, "If you wants something give it to her. I won't mind. She can't keep her eyes off you."

"No way," Harry whispered hoarsely and was told to be the perfect host.

He grabbed a bottle of wine and a couple of chicken rolls that had been left over and grabbed a backpack. When he and Frankie rode off she asked, "What did Sophia whisper to you?"

Harry couldn't believe his luck. This would allow him to subdue the visitor.

"Sophia told me I wasn't to have sex with you."

"Oooh that's a challenge. How long will we be away?"

Harry wondered what the hell did that mean.

They stopped for refreshments after rounding the end of the island and he told Frankie about the Private's Cave that really was not completely a cave because parts of one side had fallen away, letting in light high up.

"Oooh please show it to me."

"We need a boat to get into it because the entrance is on a rock face and there's no track in."

"Could you swim around and into the cave?"

"We don't have swimsuits and anyway the water is freezing. Actually the water is only about four feet deep on a sandy bottom."

"Then let's wade. We can dry in the sun."

"Well I don't know."

"God you sound like an old man. Come on, take me to where we can get down to wade in.'

"It's just over here but I don't know..."

Frankie said nothing until they were at the lake edge.

"Well I'm going."

"I can't allow you. I'm responsible for you."

"Well come with me."

She removed her top and shorts and stood in her bra and panties.

"Well all right," Harry said, unlacing his shoes and then removed his top and shorts. He looked up and saw Frankie without a stitch on.

"Come on, you get it all off too."

"Y-you have a nice body. I m-might..."

"Get a hard on? I would hope so. Come on let's pretend to be pirates."

"Jesus it's cold," Frankie said, sliding into water almost to her breasts.

"Oh damn that's disappointing. Come back out."

"No I'm off."

"Wait!"

They went hand in hand on the sandy bottom that was fairly even.

"My tits are turning blue. How's your dick?"

"P-probably blue."

She giggled and he had to admit he liked her style. She should do well in TV production.

They entered the cave and the water depth became shallower.

"God it's spooky," she giggled. "Kids will crap themselves coming in here. Omigod are those treasure chests?"

"Yes old cabin trunks we purchased for four bucks each at the secondhand shop in the village. Three are locked and a full of rocks. The one open and on it's side has old candlesticks and gold braid curtain pulls, junk necklaces and some color stones that could be mistaken for rubies and emeralds and there's a toy sword and an imitation musket."

"But how will the kids get through those iron bars?"

"They are actually round aluminum rods. I brought in a gas generator and drilled holes top and bottom, the top hole being much longer and wider. I lifted the rod up high into that cavity and then held the other end over the bottom hole and dropped that in and then ram in metal wedges into the top hole to jam the bar in tight."

"Oooh you clever boy. Here let me feel your nuts. God you cock and balls are freezing, lets get back into sunlight and dry off."

Harry had noticed he wasn't cold enough to stop his dick to begin to stiffen in Frankie's hand.

Back on the grass, eating a filled roll each they sat staring at one another until she took the initiative and said, "Would you like to rumble?"

He grinned and said it would warm them up.

They ate hurriedly and half an hour later dressed and they hurried across country to return to the homestead. Harry was dressed, having a beer out on the rear terrace where it was sunnier at late afternoon when the other three women returned.

Sophia kissed him and before going off to help Sarah get dinner asked, "Did you get a leg over?"

"No," he lied.

"What happened?"

"Well nothing. We just talked and she showed no interest at all. I was waiting for her to make a move."

"You were what? Oh you oaf. Have you forgotten how to seduce a woman?"

Left by himself, Harry thought of fucking that much younger woman. He'd thought Frankie would be tight but no way. He also thought being only twenty and was taking drama studies and theater studies part-time would not have known much about sex but she'd leapt at him and was jerking his cock to get it up hard before he fully realized what she was doing and after she'd sucked him off she rode cowgirl and skillfully kept him feeling fully involved. Christ he wished he'd had known as much about sex as she did when he'd been twenty. She'd proven to be a great fuck and he loved seeing her enjoying it so much.

Frankie arrived via the kitchen carrying a glass of wine.

"I offered to help but Sarah said it was all under control. When I saw Sophia I felt so guilty that I almost confessed I'd had sex with you."

"What!" Harry croaked.

"I said almost," Frankie laughed. "I'm not that stupid."'

The chopper arrived back at 5:50 and the pilot went for a bike ride, leaving the presenter Michelle Black talking to Sarah and Harry the originators of the cattle round-up on bicycles scheme while she framed her questions, leaving it to Maria the director to coax Sarah and Harry to give snappy answers and to inject humor where possible.

After twenty-minutes Michelle said she was done and she asked, "You know I've never seen a llamas up close enough to touch it."

"Harry take Michelle out on the Gator now."

Michelle was all for it, although dressed in a cocktail frock and high heels. At the barn she kicked off her shoes and they were off, racing against time because a rehearsal was planned in the woolshed at 5:15. But there was no problem. Llamas being llamas came to them as soon as the Gator entered the pasture.

To Harry's surprise Michelle appeared rather timid and then asked him to hold her. She leaned back into his arms and whispered, "Kiss me."

He obliged and then Michelle broke free and walked straight into part of the group of llamas and they sniffed her and she patted them.

"They are so gorgeous," she said coming back to Harry." Could I have a really proper kiss and then we must go. I wash I could have spent more time with the llamas and much longer time with you. I haven't had my hands on a hunk like you for quite some time, perhaps a year."

Harry drove back wondering what the hell was it with women on this island. Was Sarah putting something in their coffee? Harry of course was forgetting since he'd been on the island he'd been repairing fences dressed just in shorts, socks and boots, the warming sun had bleached his hair a bit. He'd sweated clearing the 50-acre pasture of possibly a ton of stones along the cattle trail to reduce the likelihood of mishaps to cyclists and work like that had tightened his body and made his arm muscles more pronounced.

If he had thought about it he would have admitted he was really feeling fit and healthy. These women had noted it and the fact he needed a haircut only served to make them notice him more when it blew in the wind. Also he was not a short-ass guy, being six-three. These women were all representative of the new style of woman emerging: energetic, focused on health, exercise and diet and tall. Frankie and Michelle we both six feet while Sophia was a tad over six-one.

"Are you into Sophia?"

"Um yes."

"I thought you would be. There can't be much alternative activity around here.""

"Two fucks a day plus working means we sleep well Michelle."

"Oh what a life you two must have."

"Most people have a life capable of being adjusted into a great life, if only they realized it."

"God that's so true. And yet why don't we think of that?"

"We were perhaps all unwittingly raised to be masochists."

Michelle laughed, a genuine sounding laugh and she stretched and yawned, "God two weeks out here with you as someone good to look at as well as being gentle and a homely philosopher would do wonders for any girl Harry."

"Yeah will we don't all get things what we want do we? You give me the impression you'd be really great in bed. Are you married?"

"Yeah but he's becoming a big disappointment. He wants me to stop working nights."

""Dump him and stay single if you really want to develop a career."

"God the gentle man has a ruthless streak. I like it. I hope Sophia realizes just how lucky she is."

""Michelle, Sophia says she doesn't mind if I have casual sex with other women. What do you think about that?"

"Well that may have startled you. I would suggest looking for fishhooks."

"Yeah, that had occurred to me."

"Well if you are not proposing to get really serious with her then does it really matter?"

"Exactly and I'll have to think about the outcome I would like. Here we are. We are in time."

"What is the big thing for you about watching people driving cattle on bikes?"

"The fun they have and that includes trying to avoid going ass over tip."

"Yes and that was my impression watching the unedited film our guys ran for me before I left the studio. The look on the faces of some of those Scouts was a joy to behold."

"Yeah, pure adrenaline adventure."

The interview well and the TV crew flew off and Sarah, Sophia and Harry went back to the house to view the recording they'd made of the TV station's complete presentation about the dude ranch. They were thrilled with it.

Sarah answered the house phone and returned grinning. "That was the entertainment officer for a solo parent's organization. She's booked out our accommodation for two weeks. It's started."