All Comments on 'My Beautiful Kinky Mother Ch. 01'

Nice enjoyable story.

Would like there to be a bit more mother son love interaction not just sex.

The son should replace dad, maybe dad has something in the office.

I can't wait for the next installment. 5 stars and added you to my favorite author list!

Not bad for a beginner. Keep up the good work. I usually try to offer constrictive advice to new writers, but nothing jumps out at me,

Too many sloppy mistakes to be a really good read.

Here's some examples:

1 - I hoped (hopped) on the computer

2 - I believed (breathed) deep taking all of this in

3 - she took a soft bit (bite)

4 - laid her down on the living (room) rug

The wankers will piss and moan about the grammar police and tell you to ignore my comments. But if your goal is to write really hot stories and get some of those big red H's then you need to be a little less careless.

Actually, this is an excellent story, especially for a first effort. The writer keeps stressing how awesomely dirty Brad and Karen are acting, because here was a big strong son fucking the living shit out of his own mother. "In a dirty way, she was calling out the fact that she was my mother and it was sending the both of us into overdrive." They're inflamed by the fact that the hairy hole Brad was tearing to pieces is the same hole he came out of 18 or so years ago as a little baby. Karen doesn't demurely refer to it as her vagina. Instead, she tells her son, "Fuck my CUNT, baby, fuck mommy's CUNT!" and then, "Pound that twat!" I love it when a mother calls her vagina her "cunt" and her "twat." It's so primal and raw. She's pushing all her son's buttons, referring to his penis over and over again as his "cock," telling him that his "cock is so hard"--just like a mommy likes her baby boy's cock to be--refers to his "heavy balls" and eggs her kid on to "unload those balls!" And that's exactly what Brad does, as he shoots his semen in the best cum of his life, of his mother's too, all over her bountiful tits, the same tits he nursed on so many years ago. But young Brad's still got lots of that glorious stuff in those heavy balls of his. Time to unload them up his mother Karen's cunt, his own mommy's warm wet ever-loving twat, and fuck a baby up where he was once a baby. Please, gifted author, tell us all about it. And, dear rwy, be as dirty as you like.

Yeah, it could be more polished, but it was easy to follow and I could "see" this happening. Not sure about giant tits and plump ass for a woman who works out and instructs others in fitness. But, again that could be personal preference.

I always get off on mother-son sex, especially that written from the mom perspective so this was good.

I appreciate the good and bad comments. Chapter 2 is almost complete. Definitely taking more time to comb through it and find the error and inconsistencies.

I have decided to change up and write in the third person so we can delve deeper into the dirty mind of Karen as well. More scenarios, more love, and lots more raunchy hardcore sex between mother and son.

Thanks again everyone and don't hesitate to post what kind of plots you would like to see Karen and Brad create for themselves.

for the next chapter,,,,,,,,,,,,,,dad admits a relationship with his secretary.

Dad agrees to split for good,.............Alone in the house..now things really get out of control. Son moves into Mom's bedroom and the FUCKING is 24 / 7

It was inevitable.........................a pregnancy

An exciting start! it's your first story, and in my opinion bodes well. The basic ingredients are all there, a really slut mom, a foul language and a horny son. Maybe, you have to build a little better the situations and some detail more in the sex scenes to make them more engaging to the reader. Also use lingerie and high heels make you look mother more provocative. I wait impatiently Chapter 2. You can work freely fantasy to make the mother more and more perverse and more exciting situations, who knows where it can get! It could become a nice series. Good Job.

I don't know what I liked more: Karen playing the sweet and loving mother role while her son pounded her needy cunt, or struggling to contain their loud fucking from her husband as he waited for her upstairs. Hope you keep these two things going in the sequel. It's super hot when the mother is completely into incest and risky sex and plays it up during the act.

You wrote, "I think the title and description speak for them selves," The description, yeah, but while it could be argued incest is inherently kinky, there's nothing that's really out of the ordinary -- at least plot-wise.

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Don't get me wrong, it's a strong first story and the sex is rather hot. However, the muscular and hung son, the young, built, and well preserved mother, and the inattentive father who has gone to seed is one of the more typical incest plots. The story that's not in some way a cliche is rare. It's what you do with the cliche that matter, and so far so good.

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That's why I disagree with most of the comments about the desired direction. Having the father have a girlfriend and leave or the son become the house alpha male subjugating the father are REALLY cliched and trite. Now, if you have him become at least somewhat aware of what's happening, get his act together, and they become a threesome, that would actually be different. Yeah, there are stories where the father and son share the mother, but it most cases the father and mother have a strong relationship and add the son to the mix. There aren't many where the son/mother fucking is a catalyst for the father to get his shit together.

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Of course, this is all moot since you've already plotted the other chapters. I still wonder, though, what the kinky part will be.

Awesome ideas people and thanks for the criticism. I knew I would be writing multiple chapters so I felt it was necessary to have the characters break the ice in this chapter. Then that would open things up to other possibilities. I don't plan on taking years to complete the story so the perversion can progress over a few chapters.

Chapter 2 will been submitted tomorrow. Ch. 3 is finalizing. Exploring ideas for ch. 4. Lets hear it.

I FUCKING WANT MORE> THIS GETS ME SO HARD I WANT MORE OF THIS> ONE OF THE BEST I READ IN HERE THUS FAR! GREAT DESCRIBING AND HOPE YOU COME OUT WITH PART TWO REAL SOON!

I liked your effort. There were a few errors but they can be overcome with better editing. Love the lust without subtle seduction. We need more hot animal sex like that.

My only real criticism is a personal choice. I like smaller boobs. As I said this is a personal choice not criticizing you or your story at all.

After saying that I see a cuckold coming soon. Will dad get to watch or will they fuck with him close by?

there's more?

Then don't end your tales with THE END or a dumb to be continued.

make sure you have a solid close.

How many books have you read that have THE END for each chapter? None, because they're good writers.

I love a mom who has sexual needs and isn't afraid to get satisfaction from her son. Brad's a lucky guy, and he'll have even more fun when his dad isn't home.

Any eroticism this had was completely lost in whatever language the "author" chose to submit it in. It sure as hell wasn't English!

Your first story, IMHO, was very good! My only issue was with all that (great) dirty talk, Dad didn't wake up.

If Mom has a rack and a great ass, you've got a thumbs up from me.

While reading this, I was thinking of Kimberly Guilfoyle. Hmmm. ;)

I will definitely be cumming back to this story. You are awesome.

Ps the dirty talk was on point, not to little not to much, and hot as hell

Really good story but you should have Proof Read it prior to making it public.

Mom has giant boobs and a big ass. AND she's the head trainer at a gym? Have you ever seen such a person managing a gym? That was where I stopped reading.

More please. Editing could use some improvement.

Don't worry about the grammar police since they always show up to point out small stuff...it's what they do!

the first part was great and I love it when you wright thing like this this one has a good story so far . I will give it a 8 in score Iv only read the first chapter , but I bet this wil be one of my faveret story don't now yet tell you when done with all chapters. your a great wrighter and thank for shareing your gift with us .

your amazing, please write more

A very hot start to this story! Thank you!

I loved it!!! A very hot chapter 1 to a very hot story!!! Looking forward to reading chapters 2,3,4..

Good story. Looking forward to the rest of your writings.

My mother was like that having sex with other people as Dad had left us. Trouble is one day my mother was making love to my friend from school who lived local. We would meet each morning at mine and walk together. Mum knew James well. Think we were 14 at the time. Girls were always the topic about sex.

I should have been at after school club but it was cancelled so made my way home early. Went in the kitchen door and Mum wasn't around. Thought she might be at a neighbours as I wasn't due home.

Went up to my bedroom to change and heard sounds. Standing still realised it was coming from Mum's bedroom. Looking into Mum's bedroom saw my friend James on top of Mum and both naked. They were both engrossed in what they were doing and talking loud.

I retreated back down stairs and thought I had better disappear. Then had another thought, I could use this to my advantage and made a cup of tea. James mother was single like Mum and I'd had sexy thoughts about her when in James's house.

When they came down and saw me drinking tea in the kitchen, think I was on my second cup, there face was a picture. I could do nothing else but grin at there shock. Mum started to stutter and James said "I was helping your Mum".

Mum said "We were ........ just ........ "

"Forget it Mum" I said "I know what you were doing, not cross, bit jealous as its not happened to me".

"And James" I said "I know how you look at my Mum".

"Sorry Brian" James said "It wont happen again, promise".

"Lier, James of course it will your hormones are racing the same as mine", I said.

"Okay Brian you are a good friend and I've noticed you looking at my Mum", James said.

Mum and James both looked at each other.

"Why don't we have a cuppa and talk about this", I was definitely in control of the situation. Mum put the kettle on.

"Brian are you saying you don't mind James and I carrying on with your approval" Mum said.

"Yes Mum" I said "I would rather you making love to James than some of your other partners, but ........ " with a pregnant pause, "James" I mumbled "I do fancy your Mum and have had sexual thoughts about her .... do you think you could help me to make love to your Mum".

James said with thought "Well I suppose so as I've said to her she should get out and date. Mum's a bit shy but I do know she likes you as she often talks about you".

Mum spoke "Boys, Mary your Mum James has said to me she would like to date as she confided in me she missed a sex life. So maybe we could work on it to set something up".

James said "Brian I'd be pleased for the both of you, lets think of something".

Mum said "Isn't it time you went home James as your Mum will worry and I don't want you 'grounded' do we", Mum smiled. "and you go with him Brian as there is safety in numbers and I need a shower and prepare dinner".

"Okay Mrs. Harding, we can plan something", James said sarcastically.

"Cheeky sod James, long time since you called me by my surname. Helen is good enough" Mum said.

With that Mum kissed us both on the lips and said "Go".

Felt a bit jealous about the way Mum kissed James. On the way over I asked James how long it had been going on, he only said "A while".

"It's okay James I'm not cross" I said.

"Well since last Easter when you went away to your grand parents. Now I have a thought about you and my Mum. I'm going to Dad's in two weekends time as you know so maybe if your Mum could arrange to go away my Mum would have you over and maybe with a bit of smooth talking you might be lucky". James said.

"Good idea James" I said "we have 10 days. I'll put it to Mum".

"Now Brian when we see Mum now, be over friendly, maybe a bit 'touchy feely', Mum loves me holding her hands and maybe a kiss on the cheek when you leave".

"Good thinking 'Batman', I'll work on it", I said.

"Okay 'Robin' James said as we walked in.

"Nice to see you Brian, don't see so much of you nowadays. Hope you two haven't been up to any mischief. Are you staying for a drink Brian?". Mary said.

"Well you wouldn't since I've been in long trousers" I said chuckling "and yes to a cuppa please".

"Oh you", Mary gentle slapped my arm "I'll put the kettle on".

"I owe you on for that Mrs. Litton". I grinned.

James said "I'm going upstairs to put school work down and hang my jacket up". Leaving and behind his Mum's back put his thumb's up to me, I responded the same.

Went over to Mary while the kettle was boiling took her hand and said jovially "Isn't that 'assault' you smacking me".

"Technically yes Brian" Mary said and taking her hand out of mine slapped me again harder saying "might as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb', chuckling.

With that I said "Oh that hurts" rubbing my arm laughing, then gave Mary a playful slap on her bottom "now we are evens Mrs. Litton".

"Cheeky boy" Mary said "now where's that son of mine. Give him a shout Brian".

James appeared soon after. I was pleased I'd broken the ice with Mary and she did have a nice bottom. James caught my eye behind his mothers back and put his thumb up, I just nodded back a yes.

"Do you want a slice of cake boys?" Mary said. "silly question all 14 year olds are hungry.

"James replied "Yes please Mum".

I replied "Yes please Mrs. Litton".

"Think we can dispense with the Mrs. now Brian, Mary will be fine. I know James calls your Mum Helen and I hope he is respectful.

"No never Mrs....... Mary" I said.

Mary chuckled "I know better than that" and ran her hand through James's hair.

We chatted for a while then said "I'd better go".

We all got up from the table, with confidence I took Mary's hand and shook it saying "Thank you for the cake and tea", and pulled her towards me kissed her on the cheek said "good bye .... Mary".

James walked me to the front door and whispered "How did it go?"

Whispering back said "Good, done what you said. Made her laugh and she slapped me so jovially slapped her back on her bottom then you saw me shake her hand and kissed her".

"Wonderful" James whispered then louder so Mary could hear "See you tomorrow for school, bye".

Arriving home Mum was showered and the smell of food was in the air "That smells good Mum".

"Brian .... you were very adult about ..... James and I" Mum said embarrassed "sorry".

"Don't be Mum, initially I was cross, then thinking about it I knew you were seeing neighbours" I said "and James and I often talk about sex as boys do, its 'be all and end all' of playground talk so with thought turned it around to my advantage".

"Well good, Helen told me to call her by her Christian name and made her laugh" then went on to say about our plan. Mum said "I'll go away that weekend when James is with his Dad and I'll go over and see Helen to arrange it. I didn't want to say in front of James but Helen is very frustrated and wants sex but she is shy. Brian I'll do my best for you, keep popping in on James and Helen over the next few days".

"Thanks Mum, you're the best. We'll have to arrange something for you and James, I'm sure one afternoon isn't enough for the both of you and can you stop with the neighbours please".

"Deal Brian, I've felt its a bit too close to home and James and I have managed more than once a week. Hope you are as lucky with Helen", with that Mum gave me a kiss on the lips saying "lets eat, making love always makes me hungry".

"Mum your face was a picture when you came down stairs and saw me here drinking tea".

"You're so right Brian", taking another mouthful Mum said "Lets talk about love making and the prelude to it about what ladies like sometime soon".

Well that's how my sex life took off with James Mum Helen the weekend James went away. The first time was good for me but now I know I was just a novice but Helen helped me. That weekend we were in and out of bed all the time and even christened the kitchen table. Nowadays James and I spend the entire night in each others home now Helen knows about James and my Mum. I think Mum orchestrated that.

Life is good for all four of us.

REgards

Great first outing

The story needs to slooooww down somewhat, as they--mother Karen and Son Brad--seem to go too quickly from one fuck scene (hardly any LOVE scenes) to the next. Each of the ensuing "fuck" scenes are repetitious with similar conversations and descriptions of the seemingly lust situations.

The story needs some risk factors of Karen's husband/Brad's father, having small suspicions that something unusual is or has occurred, in his mind not that it is necessarily sexual, but is unusual, as he has noticed at various times the bed is rumpled, there's an unusual stain on the bathroom vanity, or there's a couple dried spots on the couch of he heard some odd noises downstairs a couple times over the past several weeks--all places where mother and son have fucked or even made love.

As the story gets close to ending, Karen finds out that she is pregnant, has several months to come to final solutions of explanation to her husband, and finally confesses her and their son's deep, divining love for each other. Her husband, Brad's father (maybe he himself has an unknown, outside love-interest) suggests that divorce, with ample monetary conditions, is the only solution. Brad's parents divorce, mother and son sell the house, move to some isolated area after he graduates high school, become lovers and have four successive pregnancies of three daughters. this scenario leaves material for additional stories of Brad having five pussies to keep satisfied in about fifteen years later.

Success requires successful repetition, desire, determination, love and willpower!!

Truthfully it made me so horny my cock is so hard you accomplished what you set out to do😎

Love stories where the submissive Mother lets the son have his way with her. Especially like the Mother telling him to "use me" Would be more of a turn on if he would call her a slut, etc.

there had been a bit of a build up.

Jesus Christ, was this written by a 4th grader? The story itself was hot, but unfolded really fast. But the butchering of the English language was horrific!

Since when does an adult male call his mom mommy?

To answer your question;

An adult male calls his mother 'mommy' when he is behind her, gazing down at her perfect ass, marvelling at the shape of her wonderfully firm hanging tits, and at the sweat glistening on her perfect body, while pounding the shit out of her cunt and filling her hot pussy with incestuous cum!

Or, at least I do!!!!!

On the right track but "mommy" is a huge turn off to me. I'd also can the needless thump thump thump sound effects. You might try to convey the fuck motions using another method.

The average person is not "turned on" by massive tits or massive asses, they unconsciously gravitate to stories about average people like them. Personally I prefer a B or C cup where I can get most of her tit in my mouth or my hands.

Obviously English is NOT your first language, and even if it were, you badly need an editor to correct your "errors''.

Read some of the stories on Lit by popular authors, especially in the incest section, if that's what you're going to continue to write and pay attention to the characters they create.

I'm not going to put my name here because I am an editor. And no, I'm not looking for other editing work.

where did the pics on the computer come from and why was he so shocked to find them?

What happened to the last folder he didn't get to look at?

How did his mom go from "your father is upstairs" to unzipping his pants?

The story fell apart for those reasons early on which is probably why other commenters are being picky.

Also agree that no son should be saying mommy after the age of 7.

Otherwise good effort.

My first problem is all the mistakes in your grammar. Every time I hit a mistake, I have to stop and figure out what you're trying to say. Some times it's easy but more often than not, it will take a minute or so. That breaks the continuity of the story.

That's like watching porn and once every minute a face pops on the screen and says BOO.

I know you don't have an editor and you're using a spell checker. Turn the damned spell checker off and never turn it back on.

Send me the DOCX files on this series and I'll edit them for you so you can see what an editor can do for you. I already edit for some other people so I'm not looking for anymore editing but I'll do it one time for you.

meltnmold@yahoo.com

Like many other people have said, there are parts missing (the pictures), grammar, and more description needed past Thump ( I rocked steadily inside of her like one would rap a knocker on a heavy door) Please look at everyone's critique as help and not downplaying what you have. There's a really great story under here that needs a bit more polish!

Ehh, sometimes being too descriptive is overrated, I like simple for short stories, I like the " thumps" lol. As for grammar errors, not terribly bad , seen worse, but nothing wrong with proof reading lol, overall I liked it. And who cares where the pics on computer came from.

NOT all guys who have actual incest are jocks, 98% are ugly bastards,

who for some reason or another don't go out looking for Women.

They are either Mama's boys or are living in an area where their relatives are the only safe people to fuck.

other than that, it a great story line.

Please write chapter 6

I just Love your Descriptive stories!!! Just Awesome! Please write more!!!!

very well written

It could imagen all of it, very hot and sexy. you are right about the art of dirty talk is dying out.

Dirty talk 👍

The dialogue in this story sounds like it comes straight from a Xev Belinger porn video. Just like cumming on her tits. No mom/son incest does that their first time. Plagiarizing? Maybe.

It's a bit of a clichè. Mom with Big tits and arse fucks son with huge cock.

Don't listen to the morons telling you to ignore the grammar police as they are just happy with you spelling it all out to them in descriptive terms as they have no imagination.

Listen to the grammar police as it will improve your writing.

All in all it was a good start.

I wish someone would write a story of women with smaller tits. It seem like men are self centered, large breast cause women back pain. I know you like them big but stop planting the seeds and enjoy what she has to offer.

I fucked my mom while my dad was sleeping beside. I gave my dad sleeping pills and fucked the brains out of my mom. She always like to get impregnated my me.

Ah - YES - what a beginning! So glad I found you - so descriptive and well told

Sloppy, needs editing. I'm not a grammar cop but this is a mess. Why go to the trouble to write a story and not bother to clean it up a bit?

If this is your first complete story, you are going far! Great job. One very important suggestion; please re-read your story to catch any typos and incorrect words, or better yet, have someone who is also a writer proof and edit the story. Many semi-professional editors on the site will be happy to do it if you do theirs.

One last suggestion: Never incorrectly use the words there, their, and they're, and most importantly never use 'insure' instead of 'ensure'. They're totally different words! Spell checkers are anathema! Using correct grammar and spelling is vital. Thank you for your submission and best of luck.

I agree with SanibelBelle, PLUS use your and you're correctly.

Feeling your nuts.

Or

Feeling you're {you nuts.

They're not the same.

The poor grammar and spelling put me off. I know people complain about Grammar Nazis but you should really make use of the many volunteer Editors on this site. However there were two more things which ruined the story for me.

* "... she looks incredibly like the an older Denise Milani." Who the hell is Denise Milani? What does she look like? You are the author: don't tell me WHO she looks like, tell me WHAT she looks like. Has this Denise Milani got purple hair and a big warty nose? I have no idea. This seems to be a fairly common with 'wannabe' writers who are too lazy to describe their characters.

* All those upper-case sentences: were they meant to indicate that the two were shouting? With her husband just upstairs? You don't need all those capitals just describe how they speak their words.

I did not vote for this story and will not waste my time on the continuing chapters.

This could've been a good story if the author had put some effort into learning English well. Do teachers, nowadays, teach that proofreading is an evil, old-fashioned, process that is no longer an acceptable practice when writing? It seems like it, in the vast majority of articles and stories these days.,

You lost me at 32E. Sounds like an anorexic with fake tits. She would probably tip over.

Well written made me cum hard. Felt like I was there with you !

When readers comment things like "your great"

Nonintelligent comments like that means writers don't learn that it's "you're great" as in you are great.

Also it's "off my plate" not of.

Surely this story can only get better but by the number of morons who put up with writing like this I doubt it.

Interesting concept. Dad must sleep like the dead, if all that commotion downstairs isn't waking him up. The 32E tits were a little much-as some others have pointed out, probably fake. Most guys like natural tits, of any size; even the enhanced ones don't look natural at that size. At least she doesn't have a shaved pussy, too-unless I missed something.

As others have mentioned, and I hope I'm not beating this to death, proofread. Proofread til you're sick of the story. Don't rely on spellcheck, it will steer you wrong more times than you imagine. Simple grammar and spelling errors really distract from what might otherwise be a compelling story. I have 80 plus stories on here, and read them over and over til I don't want to see them again, and still find errors in the published version. There's no substitute for checking your work. Looking forward to see how chapter 2 works out. Hopefully, they have an encounter while dad's at work, and he can cum in her pussy, as nature intended.

I loved the story it made me cum so fucking hard

How better to show your Mom how much you love her than f**king her brains out! A great start to what promises to be a great series. I look forward to reading how this relationship blossoms. I appreciate your and your Muse's imagination (memories?) and abilities to bring it to your story. Thank you for sharing your vision and talents.

Too much b******* nobody will believe that it's true

She is the "model" Mommy of every young mans dreams and kinky to boot

can't wait for part 2. mom on top --grinding away and playing with her clit and that uninhibited approach puts a clear picture in my mind. or did my imagination turn it into a video. love her body type too

Goddess of a mother with ridiculous cleavage, but of course, the husband somehow fails to appreciate her the way she should be. Not the most plausible plot point but many stories do tend to go with it sadly. At least it's pretty damn hot so I can't argue there.

Despite the outrageous details of the story, I must say that such happenings do happen more than most people realize. Especially when the mother is. MILF, In her late 30's with a hot body and a mediocre husband who isn't giving her the attention she needed.

This was a HOT, SEXY cum-producing story.

There were a few errors in the writing and spelling. And the plausibility of it is, well... possible, but not quite likely. But It got a load of cum out of my cock.

KAREN GET PREGNANT BY HER SON

BARD IS GOING BE A DAD / HAVE A BOY OR A GIRL

Hhhmmm...so many comments...so positive...you must be proud!!??

I am gonna do THIS-you REALLY need to edit/proof-reading you work!! As good as it is (and I DO mean this!!), the errors distract/detract from the telling of the story!!

Still, a Five**5**Star tale. Moving on to Chapter 2 now!!

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