All Comments on 'My Brother's Wife'

My only criticism is that you made all of the bad guys Republicans. In reality, neither the tweedle-dee party nor the tweedle-dum party has a monopoly on virtue, competence, or integrity - both steal all they can, manipulate the hell out of the working man, and then pick away at each other while Rome burns.

Otherwise your story is a good variation on an old theme and is a good read.

Very touching and genuine. Also, while I agree that tweedledee and tweedledum are both equally capable of wretchedness, the contemporary political scene has demonstrated the viciousness of one particular party machine towards those who disagree with their views, by destroying the dissenters with lies, threats and innuendo. So it doesn't surprise me that the "bad actors" are portrayed in the colors of this party. That, however, is not the issue with the story. The story is still one of the best I have read.

that woman caused a lot of heartaches and pain and tragedy; why blame her strict (republican and religious) parents or society, when she did the wrong thing to both brothers (not that Gordon was much of a man anyway)

a woman like that shouln't be allowed to produce so many kids!,,, but, yes, good story nonetheless

Very different and so well done. I liked it and it did grab me and hold me to the end. The sex scenes were superb. Cindy continuing with the wedding made sense to me as the Author in his dialogue explained it. As far as all the legal stuff it sounded plausible to me, but there are a lot of legal aspects someone always points out.

My only real comment is thank you for hard work and the great read. I so look forward to what ever you have for us readers next

PT

I can't disagree more with the one blaming Cindy for the problems. Each person is responsible for their own actions!!! Something so many people today refuse to recognize. It's always "it's not my fault.....". Well, Gordon built his own troubles. He built the problems with his brother ALL his life! You can NOT blame Cindy for anything someone else did!! Especially Gordon.

Sure was a tough, tragic path to a happy ending. It's gratifying that his business boomed after the move but I feel they would have been happy together no matter what they did.

maybe she should have broken off with Gordon, but given his already existing hatred of his brother, what would have happened then? keep it up great work

I enjoyed this tale; it was well written with an interesting theme. Hatred between siblings is really not all that uncommon, although, of course, it doesn't often lead to this conclusion. I'm happy that the author provided a happy ending - I think that the story might have been too dark without that. Thanks for a good read.

A great read. Thanks.

Phil

I agree with earlier posters: I simply cannot understand how the victim of spousal abuse is at fault here. Blaming Cindy for marrying the wrong brother is petty (and the author is careful to show us why she did it). Moreover, she remained faithful to her wedding vows despite the temptation she faced. Only when her husband became abusive did she act and then only to save herself and her children. And this is somehow wrong? If Cindy's behavior is morally wrong or unethical, pray tell what should she have done?

Thank you, jack, for an enjoyable story. Keep up the good work.

The sister was right. Cindy should have called off the wedding to Gordon and married Scott. It's sad when we let others run our lives.

Boyd

How could they afford Jamaica if they were broke? And the story had to much sex. It would have rated the highest score if you deleted the sex scenes and focused more on Scott, Cindy, and the girls. If I had wanted to read about so much sex (I skipped over most your sex scenes) I would have read a gang-bang story.

Before you nitpick little things like the trip to Jamaica, take a look at the cheap deals to go there. It was not out of reality to put that in. Maybe the author felt the sex scenes confirmed the relationship of the characters.

Either way, it had good plot and structure. Keep up the good work.

Blaming Cindy is just plain wrong. I agree that each person is responsible for his/her own actions. Gordon choose to be violent, and that puts his death on his own shoulders. Luke was wrong for wanting his brother's wife, but right for not acting on it until her marriage was over (which was Gordon's fault as well). A character like Cindy would probably have loved her husband, and remained faithful if he had not been abusive, and unfaithful. The sex was really good.

But something I've not seen anyone mention is the spin on the classic Liberal vs Republican. The author seems to be a republican hating liberal who decided to throw politics into the mix. The obvious republican bashing was just cheap, and discusting. If one of your characters is a politition, it is best to not mention what their political stance is. If it wasn't for this issue, I would have rated the story much higher.

I enjoyed the storyand it was kind of predictable. He had a lot of good fortune in the end. The story could be a script for a LIFETIME CHANNEL MOVIE. Farrah Fawcett could be the wife.

Immediately, from the beginning, I indentified with the younger brother. The big difference was I never had to deal with a lot of what he did. I left home and never went back. I visited but never stayed. But I could sympathize withthe younger brother and agreed with everything he did.

I think this was probably the best written story I have read on LIT and applaud the auther for his efforts.

This was the best of the best of the stories here.

Keep up the good work.

I really admire your transition to story's of lifelike proportion filled with emotion and respect with consequence where realistic. Your imagination doesn't seem to know any boundry. How do you do that?

Just very well done Author and a great addition to your growing portfolio of talented work.

I look forward to your next effort.

With Very High Regard

Such talent! You should be writing books.

I agree with all of the positive comments about your writing ability. You enabled us to see this period of his life from his POV. Of course, thanks to the national attention he recieved donations to stay afloat until the Nashville deal came in (Scott would never tell us about those gifts it would sound like bragging).

Once again an outstanding story with realistic characters and setting.

SleeplessinMD

Your Cain and Able tale was right on. I thought your indulgence in to politics was way off base. A reference to the 'Party' would have covered what influence the brother had. I felt this tale was directed toward the midSouth and there the 'Party' would have been the old line Democrats not the republicans. But I guess you had to show your personal bias and throw trash on the party you do not suppport:( You sound like the Washington Post who published 30 stories on a word that most of us never heard of 'Macaca' just to smear a politican who they don't agree with. Shame on you. Will still read your tales :)

truth is, 90 % of cw stars are conservative and therefore republican which is the only party maintaining your ability to protect yourself with a firearm legally. i saw the conservatives dump the gay southern congressman like a hot rock and i saw the liberals stand by and support ted kennedy when his car killed more people than all my guns ever have. his car was turned into molten metal within a week of a fatal accident involving a pregnant college kid when the "law" prevents such crap except when liberals need to save one of their own. in the future remember it is more important to be jack straw than a jackass.

without the bullshit of some asshole want to tell you about his politics.look dumbass which party is putting anything in your pockets.there are pimps in washington,d.c. and we are their whores.they take from us and give to anybody who back there agenda.forget ted kennedy and think about the kids coming home dead and shot up from araq behind oil.you're fighting the wrong people,your buddies is stealing us blind and the rest are fucking each other behind.mr.dumbass think about this, i spend millions to get elected to a job that pays little over a 100,000.liberals or dumbass the party isn't doing nothing for you.keep you fighting with the so called liberals and while they fuck you over.until we stand together as americans were fucked.this to the people who think they're right.there no right we all are being fucked.

The art, like the difference is in the details. Predictable it could have been; still, what makes the difference between straw’s work and the crap on TV is the level of detail and the level of work which such complexity entails. For example, the necessity to make sure that all the details dove –tail nicely into each other. In the typical ‘soapy’ comparison you drew, you get an idiotic ‘cut’ at every dramatic juncture, at which point all actors are supposed to look as blank as possible, so as to allow ANY possible development to be added later on. The result is the legendary ridiculous narrative and acting which is immediately recognizable by its frozen /awkward style. The SNL gang made some of their most memorable parodies based on Soaps like the one you were alluding to.

No offence my friend, but what a comparison; for your sake, I sure hope you can tell the difference…

so it fits perfectly that they would be about protecting wife beaters from people using guns to defend themselves...

Your stuff always gets me oh so wet. This one is did that AND moved me emotionally AND kept me intellectually stimulated. I think if you stretched it out you could sell it as a novel. I love this story

I think three of them are to blame for whatever happened. First mistake was Cindy made by marrying a wrong guy, when she knew she had feelings for his brothers. Lets face it arrange marriage exists in the world and have more successful rate than love marriage, in some countries. And to be real, most of divorces are from love marriage. So arrange marriage was not a problem here, Problem was she knew she loved someone who was in very family and would always be there around them. If you love somebody and do not act on you wont have closure ever, which will prevent you from loving somebody else. I dont think someone could be that much jerk like Gordon as his brother described and have no criminal record for years. And if there marriage was not working it means they both were to blame. In her mind she did not love him, andit was marriage of convinience, which means she knew from starting there marriage was in trouble. She admitted she wanted his brother fro long time, so you see she might have never attempted to make their marriage work. According Scott, we could not act on whatever he thinks, it was simply act of jealousy of years inside him, which acted finally. He lived near them on purpose. Letting feeling develop in something which will never result in peace. Take the different case if he would not have hated Gordon, would he have killed him? NO. If he would not have Loved Cindy, would he have Killed him? NO. Why not just help her get free and take time to cool down, and then make move on her. According to me he provoked him on violence and killed him. They never attempted to make their marriage work. All were they thinking is get together and ending marriage or wait for it to end. So it is simply the same old story where a woman leads to disaster. And how could he justify KILLING his own brother, oh yes he HATED him because Gordon got everything Scott wanted.(not stolen, Moron!). And finally he acted on GREED for woman. And also agree with sister. Mother cannot accept a son killing her other son for a woman. So yes it is realistic, and in real human are greedy. So only greed justify his action. They loved each other then why their happiness had to be at cost of someone's life, he was Jerk, is not reason, he was cheater, is not a reason to kill him, he was more successful, is not a reason, he was abusive then why not just leave him, why entice him to act. Yes Scott hated his brother , that is the reason, he loved his woman that was the reason, he wanted him out that was the reason. Three of them are to blame but atleast those who knew what problem is and could have acted in better way should have acted. But again every thing is not perfect in real life, that is what makes it realistic. Karen is right, we could only hope they live happily after KILLING someone. You cant hate someone for lifetime otherwise he might Kill you as well. Thank god he was not GAY otherwise it would be Karen being killed.

I downgraded it from 5 to 4 stars because the description of sex was far too lengthy and a waste of my time to read 20 paragraphs when 5 paragraphs would adequately describe it.

what kind of fucking ass would kill his brother for some cheap ass bitch. I agree with the mom, i would go to my death bed hating that fucker, let me die alone before i would forgive my son for killing his brother over some slut and then marring her. I would disown my daughter to for attending the wedding. the thing that the new groom needs to look at, if she could fuck brothers, it's any bodies guess who else she could fuck, cousins,granddad, uncle wilber, the dog "rover".

not a lot of good plot stories out there today i'm glad to have found this loving one...

and like I said the first time, he basicily killed his brother for his whore wife. How is this loving? She married his brother, if she loved him so much. Why marry his brother? Scott isn't worth shit, the whore he stole from his brother is worth at least street value.Their was a little part in the wedding where the Pastor as if there is any reason why this couple should get married? I don't know, maybe he could have stood up and said I'm in love with that whore! But no, killing his brother is so much better, I hope he needs a kidney, whoops, your brother was a perfect match but you killed him, SO BOO WHOO, WHOO, another dumb ass.

Said it all

It was a good story ,his bother was a big bully who beat his wife,cheated etc. yet hue dog and one shot never read or understood what was written. It a shame these people only want to see the bitch dead, never see the human side or have any compassion. Just spit out their hate of women and their deep predijuces.

what huedogg2. you reread your own comment and decided it was shit. I agree both your comments are shit . this is a good story. just enjoy the ride and don't poison it with your SHIT

Expertly presented story of life's unpleasantness with regard to sibling rivalry love jealousy and bullying behavior. Love is very complicated at times due to the people it involves. It seems that most of the biggest life decisions are made when we are least capable to make them in our youth. This story gave clear explicit views of the pressures placed on the wife of the main character being shuffled into a marriage that wasn't totally complicit. They were pressures applied on an immature girl who had feelings in another direction. The costs of wedding and planning should be the least of concerns not the reverse. It went downhill from the time just prior to the wedding. The money the power and the bullying was abusive to this young girl who finally reached a level of maturity to find her own footing. The buildup to the conflict was legendary and the author spared no emotional nuances experienced by his characters. This story was epic. Thank you Jack_Straw!

The beginning was a nice cliffhanger, but I wasn't so enamored about a possible love triangle with two brothers at first. As the story ended however, I was happy with the plot and the resolution. You did fine work and reading it wasn't a chore either, as the quality of your writing was very good. Thanks for sharing.

Huedogg and Oneshot are probably homosexuals who simply hate all women. What ever they are, they're both seriously fucked up and poster children for bitter old men who are likely to have no one other than the undertaker at their funerals.

Someone comes after me with a weapon in my own home, I don't care who they are. I'm going to do my best to put two into the center of mass.

Scott was s piece of shot brother.

Typical of all them nasty republicans. Picking on a lovable, sweet, kind socially aware "Tree Hugger".

I wonder if this author knows how big a bigot he really is?

However, he bought the gun with one intention only. Yes Gordon was an asshole who deserved to get shot. The sister was right, Cindy could have ended it at any time. So, in the end, he killed his brother, fucked the dead brothers wife and stole his kids as well. To top it off, he should have taken his brothers first name as well. No, technically, he didn't cheat, but he lusted after her so, in the eyes of God, he did cheat. He coveted another mans wife.

Just like Cain killed Abel over Abel's twin sister, and took her with him to the east of Eden. He took his sister- in- law to Nashville. There are only a billion or so twats out in the world to choose from. Yet he chooses to choose the twat that married his brother? This guy's hypocritical sense of self righteousness is so twisted that he believes his own delusions. He is a crazy Republican just like his brother.

But that's just one opinion. And what happened to the quote, "If you can't say something nice, then don't say anything!" I am so happy to read this story with a sad but fulfilling complete tale of real life; ups and downs, pain, sorry, family struggles, mental issues and true love winning over evil. And the little ones shall lead them .. With the truth - nice feature.

Family members don't date ex-spouse or girlfriends but in this case I can over look it.

The older brother was a coward and Bully who underestimated his younger brother for the second time. This time instead of getting his ear bit hey got his ass shot and rightly so. You would think that others that work with him or for him knew he was no good. The D.A. and the Buddy Sheriff No matter what should not have been re-elected in that area. His mother knew she raised a pig now you have me talking in fragments. I find it unusual that his mother would not support her kindhearted baby boy. His sister although she came to the wedding was a none person a ditraction not a distraction and should have stayed away. Come to think of it what kind of damn family did he come from. I guess the kind that dates and marries a siblings ex. Overall situation not good, mother and sisters lack of support for her brother (was she younger or older) his brothers cronies trying to rail road him, and his relationship with his brother. Oh well, we read it and the writing was good. The story in general had a okay ending, It left a not good after taste. Taste like like how a met your mother towards the end. The best friend dates then married his friends girl friend. The dating started behind Teds back. How he got him to be okay with that and not have a shooting I'll never know. Oh yes, even television writers gloss over stuff and want you to believe it's shineola. Ted was so dumb he never saw through that for what it was, Barney was a greedy punk and not much could have said for Robin. Luckily Ted did meet a wonderful woman too bad she died. At the very end he went back to good ole back stabbing Robin. His kids were also blind they wanted him to get back with Robin too. Those characters were no better than characters in this story.

Sorry about the rant!

The older brother was a wife beater and pig. If his brother needed a kidney he wouldn't help him, he was a sick greedy jealous pigman more likely a republican 🙀

Loved it. 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Quiet you long winded liberal socialist faggot. Why are you going on and on and on about nothing that is related to this story? You made your point in your first few words, the rest was just useless garbage and a complete waste of time.

I mean, I don't necessarily think it's a good thing for a man to have to shoot his own brother, but I do recognize that it could be the only way out of a dire situation. And, family or not, there are some people on the planet who are so sorry that they just flat-out don't deserve to breathe the same air the rest of us do.

Well told story. Five stars.

Great story!

You can tell a.very good story. This.was one of them. Very good.

Some authors can't help injecting their infantile CNN/MSNB worldview into their stories. While politicians and people on both (major) sides can be hypocritical, the left is vastly worse because of its toxic combination of postmodernism, cultural Marxism, statism, and narcissism. There's nothing "liberal" about modern leftism. It's simply rhetoric in search of power to be used to vindicate the left's ("progressive's", "liberal's", etc.) sense of self importance.

Dude you feel the need to criticize the politics of a non-existent character in a story written for people to masturbate to on the internet? You must be a hit at parties

The story is unoriginal, poorly written, repetitive rubbish. There is nothing new about it. It is nicely spelled, so one star for that.

The story is original, well written, nonrepetitive treasure. There is nothing bad about it. It is nicely written, so five stars for that.

politics injected by the author into the story were purely gratuitous and added nothing. Nevertheless, the plot and the writing were quite good, so 5

Boy, those righties sure so get upset, don't they? LOL Great story, keep it up.

Excellent storyline! Well written, great character development, captivating!

The comments are truly amazing. Some anonymous trolls must get their thrills (on Literotica?) by denigrating terrific stories!

So this self-described tree-hugging pacifist bought a semi-automatic firearm, one of the very kind that he and his lib friends want to ban. Then he kept it at home without putting it in a gun-safe, even when there were kids around. When this information came out during the trial, his fellow liberals were furious with him. They couldn't understand why he didn't just call 9-1-1.

WORTHY 4.5****. IT HAS SOME HOLES AND IT COULD HAVE GONE FURTHER. WHO TOOK OVER THE FAMILY BUSINESS? THE SISTER MAKES FRIENDS BUT NOT MOM. NO REVENGE? THE FAMILY IS RICH AND STILL HAS POWERFUL FRIENDS. THEN YOU HAD TO GO POLITICAL. ALL POWER COMES FROM BEING RICH AND WHO YOU CAN BUY. THE SMALL GUY ALWAYS PAYS THE PIPER. AS FOR THE 2ND AMENDMENT, THE LIBERAL NEXT DOOR TO ME TALKS THE TALK, BEING IN NEW YORK, BUT NOW THAT THE DEMS HAVE NO MORE POLICEMEN WILLING TO WALK THE WALK, HE ASKED IF I WOULD HELP IN AN EMERGENCY. I TOLD HIM TO BUY HIS OWN GUN, LEARN TO SHOOT AND SHOOT TO KILL. AND I MEAN TO KILL, FORE IN N.Y. THE SURVIVOR WILL SUE YOUR ASS AND WIN. REMEMBER BERNARD GOETZ. ENOUGH SAID.

One serious plot hole, though. When Cindy got her divorce, you wrote:

“All Cindy really wanted was her freedom, plus custody of the girls, and that's about all she got.”

Balderdash! Not a State in the Union that she doesn’t get half of the assets, PLUS a very generous alimony AND child support from this guy, who had to plead to spouse abuse! No matter how well connected he was!

Couple things

Stay away from politics in these stories. That is to all authors. None of you do it well.

Took thee months for bail when he owned his house? Then his friends paid for defense. They would not pay for defense? I think you need to get the story straight on the money.

I ❤️ it. You must listen to your heart. If you love someone you must stand for. If not it will make lot if tragedies.

Great story, thanks Jack . . .hope that your still out there somewhere and not just dust in the wind! Probably have a touch of grey and standing on a corner in Winslow,Arizona. Well, take it easy!

somewhere east of Omaha

"If she'd just had the guts to call off the wedding to Gordon after she met you, none of this would have happened,"

THE BASTARD SCOTT SHOULD HAVE MINDED HIS OWN BUSINESS!!

CINDY SLUT WAS MARRYING INTO MONEY AND NAME!!

Pretty darn good story, I liked most of it. What I didn’t like was the way the author turned a political party name into a pejorative, basically implying that the political party was akin to fascism. Insulting someone’s political beliefs may not be as egregious as insulting a person’s race or religion but it’s certainly not a very nice thing to do. In fact some folks would consider it to be “fighting words”.

Hm...frankly, both deserved death, and the wife deserved hell, it was her cowardice that set everything in motion.

Whole story leaves a bad taste in my mouth. 1*

Surprised by all the haters that a 23 year old woman should immediately call if off when meeting the MC right before the wedding. Pretty clear both families put a lot of pressure. And hindsight is 20/20. A big ask. Where she failed is she should have left the jerk years ago. Unless there was a prenuptial, she would have gotten custody and 50/50 split. Maybe the husband had secreted away a lot money but any decent legal representation could ferret that out. Her husband wasn't a money launderer for the mafia. Also her financial capabilities as a stay at home do not enter into custodianship. If anything as a stay at home mom without a job, she has the inside track and almost impossible to overturn unless she abandoned her kids, was convicted of a crime, framed for drug use. etc. Sad to see a lot of wated time for the two lovers. Owning his on house, not sure why $50k for bail was so hard to get. Interesting that his family including his sister let him stew for four months in jail. Uggh.

The sex was a bit over the top, gratuitous.Being generous, a 4.

omg. lots o 'motinal impact stuff glauzed through but end result and a successful untublegation and prego with the budget issues of being together as a married couple but. ok. still like good people finding each other and living by their values and having a good life.

Yeah, Republicans ARE fascists, anon. That was the point.

I gave the story a 5 even though you reflected a Democrat with ethics. I know of several Democrat politicians that basically got away with murder as long as they supported the issues that the Democrats get behind. I know many more Republican politicians that screwed up and their own party turned their backs on them.

I guess it is not impossible for a Democrat to have ethics, I just don't know many that I would trust with my wife or my car. Frankly, lately I am more or less soured on pretty much all politicians anyway. Still though a good read as always.

Solid story even with the politics. Gordon deserved exactly what he got.

Kill a brother for an organism? Both brothers were reprehensible. One for being a bully, the other for being an asshole and hanging around knowingly causing weakness in a marriage.

The vehemence of USA politics amuse. To an outsider the politicians seem to serve a master, their political donors rather than the cause they espouse.