My Life Ch. 02

"Can I tell you a secret?" I managed to ask sincerely.

"Of course,"

I took several deep breaths. This was it. This was the point of no return, "About a year ago I found a website called Literotica."

Kyle nodded, "I've come across it."

"At school most of the good internet sites are blocked, but for some reason I can get that one. And I've read literally thousands of stories from that site," I paused and took another deep breath, "and the ones I look for are the ones about dominate and submissive, control, bondage – you know—that kind of thing," I sped through the last sentence just to get it out and I wasn't sure if he had understood me. He just looked at me for a long time.

"And do you just read about this stuff?"

I shook my head and forced myself too look at him. He sat back into the couch and I could tell he was deep in thought.

"Tell me what else you do."

It took me a minute to find my voice, "I fantasize about being the girl in the story when I, you know, touch myself."

"Really? I have to admit, I'm more than a little surprised. And is this what you want, or is this just a fantasy, you know, something to think about to get yourself off?"

"It's what I want," I finally managed to say with some level of certainty. "I know I don't know much about it other than what I read. I don't know what it's really like, but I want to find out."

Kyle looked at me pensively, "And are you hoping that I might show you?"

I nodded again.

"You know this puts me at a lot of risk?"

"Yes, but I would never tell anyone. I swear."

"And I believe you, but you're asking me to trust you."

"I guess so... yes."

"Okay, because I would need you to trust me, too."

I had read about the importance of trust many times, "I understand."

"Jillian, there has to be absolute trust, but this trust has to be built up slowly. It just doesn't happen overnight."

I thought about this and tried to really understand what it meant.

"Are you sure you want to start down this road, Jillian? I speak from personal experience when I say that you will feel the highest highs, but at times you'll feel some pretty low lows, too. Can you handle that?"

"... I don't know,"

"Good girl, you're being honest with me, but most especially yourself. That's a good start. I knew from the first day I met you that you were a natural submissive. Now look at me in the eye, Jillian."

I looked up and met his gaze.

"Do you want to try?"

I nodded, "Yes, absolutely," I responded.

"Alright, the safe word is Panda Bear. Do you know what a safe word is for?"

I had read about it, "I say it if I want to stop."

"Yes, but understand that I expect you to use it. I have no desire to break you. I don't want you pushing things too hard just to try to please me. I need to be able to trust that you won't let me push you too hard. Don't get me wrong. You're limits will be pushed, but we'll do it together and at a pace that doesn't get you hurt. Do you understand?"

"Yes,"

"Then you mean yes Sir."

My eyes widened as what he said was processed in my head, "Yes Sir."

"Good girl. Now remove your clothes. You will not wear any clothes in my home unless I instruct you to."

My breath stopped completely when Kyle said that and the small burning I'd felt in my chest earlier exploded into life. I stood up and, taking in a deep breath, pulled my shirt over my head and dropped it onto the floor. I then pushed the waistband of the boxers past my hips and gravity took care of the rest. I stepped out of them and stood next to Kyle.

"Good girl. Now come and sit next to me so we can keep talking."

I obediently sat next to Kyle on the couch, feeling wonderfully free and feeling new things I couldn't begin to describe. Kyle put his arm around me and took my nipple between his thumb and forefinger. I felt so small sitting next to him but if felt so right at the same time.

Kyle squeezed my nipple hard and made me gasp. I flexed my toes upward and held my breath.

"What's the safe word?"

"Panda Bear," I repeated.

"Good girl," Kyle released the pressure and returned to caressing my breast. "Now I'm going to intentionally start a little slowly. I don't want to overwhelm you too much. Also, if you have any questions I expect you to ask. Most of the time I will answer, but there may be times I'll hold my answer from you for a time."

I nodded against his chest, "I understand."

"You think you do, Jillian. And that's what worries me most. You're still a virgin when it comes to being with a man so to jump right into this world isn't the best idea. We'll start off slowly and I'll do my best to determine how hard to push you."

"Are you my master now?" I asked timidly.

"I'll answer that after I ask you a question," Kyle pulled me up onto his lap and made me look directly at him. "Do you want me to take your virginity?"

It was always hard for me to look directly into Kyle's eyes. It was easier to focus on his nose or his mouth, but now he made me look directly into those deep blue eyes.

I hadn't ever intended to stay a virgin until I was married. No one did these days, and I couldn't think of a better way to lose mine than to Kyle, and doing it in a way that I had been dreaming about for over a year.

I nodded my head, completely sure that I wanted this and said, "Yes."

Kyle smiled, "Then once you have given it to me, I will be your master."

I knew I was smiling from ear to ear despite being so nervous that my hands were shaking.

"I'm happy that you're so excited about this, but I have to warn you that this isn't going to be like those stories you read online."

My face scrunched in confusion, "What do you mean?"

"Jillian, if you've never had sex with a man before, the first time isn't going to be very comfortable, especially with me."

"Oh, well sure, I've heard that it hurts quite a lot the first time."

Kyle placed the palm of his hand on my chest and guided me to lay on the arm rest of the couch. He then began to rub his thumb against my pussy, pushing just the tip in between the lips ever so slightly. I knew I was wet down there just from the conversation and the thoughts I was having.

"Let's see what we're looking at," he said and gently inserted his index finger into my wetness. I felt it pass through the opening and immediately felt the pressure. My hand gripped his upper arm as he continued to push it slowly into me. "Just what I thought, my little girl has a very little pussy."

I blushed an all new shade of red when he said that but he held me close with the arm around my waist and his finger deep inside of my sex.

"But your finger is probably bigger than most blokes'... penises."

Kyle's head snapped back and he laughed heartily, "Maybe, baby girl, but the other parts of me are bigger too, so we're going to have to get you ready. Now, I don't want you calling things penises and vaginas. You will say cock, pussy, tits, cunt, clit, and ass and so on, do you understand?"

I nodded and asked, "How big are you? Can I see?"

My comment was met with a smile, "In a moment, but let's finish what we've started."

Kyle guided me back down to lie down on the arm cushion and brought his mouth down on the top of my pussy and slowly teased me with his tongue. I squirmed under his embrace and felt him pull his finger out a couple of inches before pushing it back in again.

"Hmm," I moaned between gritted teeth.

He kept up a slow pace for several minutes before he pulled out completely. I started to raise my head to look down when I felt his finger at my entrance again. Only when he began to push in further I realized he had added another finger. I knew my hand was squeezing his arm pretty hard but I couldn't stop. The feeling was more intense than anything I had ever felt.

"Not bad, Jillian. How are you doing?"

"Fine," I said between my teeth.

"This is as far as we'll push it today. You can use your safe word if you need to."

I shook my head and felt his fingers gain further entrance. It hurt now but I wasn't about to use my safe word in the first few minutes of starting. I felt the fingers move out and then back in, going in even further than they were a moment ago. And this became his rhythm, in a little, and then out, and then in a little deeper. It was a burning sensation and I felt a fullness I'd never experienced before, and pretty soon I felt that his fingers were in as far as they were going to go. I felt a euphoric high knowing I had at least passed this first hurdle.

"Very good, Jillian, now try and relax, and I'll try to help this feel a little better. Now, tell me what I'm doing to you."

"You're putting your fingers in my pussy," I managed to say a little calmer this time.

"Almost; I'm fucking your little cunt with my fingers. Now you say it."

I then felt his fingers begin to go in and out in a faster pace, "You're fucking my little cunt with your fingers."

The intensity continued to build but at least the burning sensation wasn't getting worse. I then felt his tongue on my clit and an all new feeling shot through my core. I let out a loud moan at this new height and I began to enjoy the moment. I turned my head and could see our reflections in the screen of the large television hanging on the wall and it was so erotic that I felt something like a concussion explode in my hips. My knees came together and my head jerked back. My stomach muscles tensed and I did half a crunch while a wave of the most intense pleasure I had ever felt ran through my body.

I held that position for what felt like several minutes before it passed and I fell limply onto Kyle's shoulder.

"I'm impressed, little one; very, very impressive."

I glowed at the compliment, "I've never felt an orgasm like that," I gasped, still feeling its ripples running through me.

"And this is only the beginning," Kyle laughed. He removed his fingers and wiped my wetness on my stomach and then put the two fingers in my mouth. I sucked on them wantonly. I knew what my pussy tasted like from so many sessions of snogging Brooklyn after she had made me cum with her tongue.

"Good girl," said Kyle again, pulling his fingers from my mouth.

I relaxed, feeling blissfully in a fog when I felt his fingers at my entrance again. I looked up, my eyes widened in surprise. Kyle watched me closely and I knew he was watching to see my reaction. I bit my lower lip between my teeth when I felt his fingers insert themselves again. I bit down on my lip and grabbed hold of Kyle's forearm tightly.

"It's too much—I'm too sensitive down there now," I complained.

"Do you want me to stop? We haven't even scratched the surface of what is to come. Are you sure this is what you want?"

I nodded firmly and pulled on Kyle's arm. I felt his fingers sink in deeply and I sucked in a sharp breath. He pulled his two fingers out until the tip of his thumb touched my swollen clit and then he massaged it between his fingers. The feeling shot an explosion of needles through me and I writhed and tried to kick myself loose. But Kyle's grip was tight and so I just thrashed in his arms helplessly.

Finally he let my abused clit go and returned to fucking me with his fingers. Occasionally he would stop and try to spread his fingers wider or, using one finger, would pull at the side of my pussy as he worked to stretch me out. This treatment went on for what felt like an hour before he finally removed his fingers and had me clean them off again.

"Have you ever sucked a cock before?"

I shook my head and suddenly all the nervous butterflies started moving around in my stomach again. Kyle moved my legs off of his and guided me to kneel at the edge of the sofa between his legs. Using the same fingers that were just in my pussy, he moved them around the inside of my mouth and around my lips.

"You might be on the smaller side, little girl, but your mouth is unusually large—"

"—Hey!" I protested, "My mouth isn't that big."

Kyle chuckled, "I love your mouth. Your lips are full and perfect. But your mouth is wider than most girls I know, but trust me; I think that's a very good thing," he ran his hands through my hair several times and then rested them at his sides, "I'm not going to give you any instructions right now. I want you to suck my cock until I cum—I'm curious to see how you'll do on your first time."

With my heart beating hard, I swallowed the lump in my throat and leaned forward onto my knees. He was wearing a pair of loose jogging shorts and it was easy to see the large bulge at one side of his thigh. I had thought that I'd felt it earlier but I wasn't one-hundred-percent sure. I reached up and hooked the waistband with my fingers and pulled down. Kyle lifted himself upwards a few inches so that I could pull the shorts out from under him.

At first I wasn't sure what I was looking at. It just seemed to be so much larger than any picture that I'd seen or image I'd had stored in my imagination.

"Oh my god!" I said involuntarily, jerking my body back several inches, "Is this for real?"

I pulled Kyle's shorts out from under his feet and set them to the side. Then I moved up onto my knees again so that I could take a closer look. It was almost as big as my forearm with a mushroom shaped head and thick veins that ran down its length.

"This will never fit!" I said, sounding a little dejected. I just couldn't ever imagine something this big ever being able to get inside me.

"Probably not for a day or two; like I said, we have some work to do to get you ready. Now go on."

I heard his words but they didn't really process as I reached out and grasped his giant cock in my small hand. It felt hot and rigid in my hand and I felt it twitch when it came in contact with my skin. I closed my fingers around its width and wasn't surprised that I couldn't touch my fingers; it was just too big. But the excitement I felt overrode any doubts and I moved my head up and took the mushroom head into my mouth.

"No teeth," Kyle admonished.

I opened my jaws as wide as I could and moved my mouth downward, feeling the head slid into the back of my mouth. I could feel a heavy vain under by stretched bottom lip and I pushed myself down even further. Kyle's cock was almost to my throat and I knew if I went any deeper that I would start to gag, so I backed off tried again.

I went back and forth a couple of times and then sat back onto my feet. Leaning against his inner thigh I ran my hand up and down his rigid cock, enjoying the feeling as it passed through my palm. I was sure he wanted to cum, and I wanted to get him there, but it was too tempting to enjoy this new experience and I was happy to feel what a man's cock really felt like. I noticed how different pressure and motions caused Kyle to react and I tried to figure out which ones he liked. After several minutes I leaned forward again and licked his cock from the bottom to the top in one smooth motion, keeping my tongue flat and wide as I did so. This elicited a sigh from Kyle and I knew I had done something right. It also set of a feeling of pleasurable satisfaction in my chest that I wasn't expecting. It made me happy and I smiled.

I repeated tonging his cock several more times and then took him into my mouth again. I tried to take more in this time and managed to succeed only a little when I gaged and had to back off.

"Someday we'll have you trained up so that you can deep throat my entire cock," Kyle said, rubbing his thumb across my cheek, "but it'll take some practice—it's not easy."

I felt him pull at the back of my head and so I took as much of his cock into my mouth as I could. I could only manage to get half of his cock in my mouth before I began to gag, so I went as far as I could each time and tried to use my hands to make up the difference. It felt awkward and I knew I was fumbling so much that Kyle probably wasn't going to enjoy it much, but I was determined so I kept trying.

After a while my jaw began to tire and it was hard to keep my mouth open so I tried to suck harder and be more aggressive with my hands. I could feel perspiration starting to build at my temples and I realized I was probably covered in a layer of sweat now. Finally when I didn't think I could keep my mouth open anymore, I felt Kyle control my head more forcefully and he began to move his cock in and out of my mouth with more urgency. I gaged loudly several times before I heard him moan and push in his cock as far as he could. I felt jets of hot liquid hit the back of my throat and I swallowed as fast as I could several times, but it soon became too much and his cum escaped from the corners of my mouth, landing on his thighs and on the couch.

"Don't swallow anymore. Hold it in your mouth for me," Kyle demanded.

I sat back on my heels again and held it like he had instructed. It was warm in my mouth.

"Now this is what separates the girls that were just made for vanilla sex from the women that want to experience everything. I want you to taste it, swirl it around in your mouth. A good little whore enjoys her reward. She wants her masters cum more than anything, and she's at her happiest when her fuck holes are full of his cum."

I did as I was instructed and closed my mouth to taste the cum. It was stronger than I thought it would be, and it was salty and musky. It wasn't so offensive that I wanted to spit it out, but it wasn't something I would order at a restaurant either, but there was a new feeling about holding it in my mouth; a pleasant feeling. I remembered feeling the cock pulse in my mouth and hearing Kyle's grown. I could feel every little tingle and twitch in my mouth. It made me happy to know I had made Kyle cum, and holding his cum in my mouth was like a trophy.

"Okay, now swallow and tell me what you thought of the taste," Kyle said.

I swallowed it in one motion and felt it slide slowly down my throat, "It was different than what I thought... not bad," I said, licking my lips.

"Good, you're being honest with me. Someday you will love cum more than anything else you could put in your mouth, but it'll take time and practice. I'm pleased you were honest with me."

I smiled at his praise. It just made me feel so complete to be kneeling in front of him and listening to him, "What's next, sir?" I asked, and I knew I had a wide smile on my face. I couldn't help it, I just felt so happy. I had almost called him master but then I remembered that I hadn't earned that right yet.

Kyle stood up from the couch and lifted me to my feet, "I'm glad you're still so enthusiastic. I hope you never lose that. Let's go upstairs and take a shower and then we'll see."

He then picked me up and carried me toward the stairs and then up to the master bedroom. I happily wrapped my arms around his neck and held on while he climbed the stairs. Kyle turned on the shower and once the water was warm we both stepped inside.

"Are you still doing ok, Jillian?" asked Kyle. He sat on the tile bench that protruded from the wall; making is so I could look down at him again.

"More than okay, sir, that was brilliant," I said, letting the jets from the showerhead work over my neck and shoulders.

"Good," he said but then got that pensive look in his eye again.

Feeling bold I picked up the shampoo bottle, put a dollop in my hand and rubbed it into Kyle's hair. I instantly saw my mistake, however. His hair was thick but short and I had used the same amount of shampoo I would have used in my own hair and it began to drip down around his ears.

"Ah bullocks," I said under my breath as I tried to wipe away the extra and put it in my own hair.

Kyle sat still while I rubbed my fingers through over his scalp and thoroughly washed his hair. I reached up on my tiptoes and just able to reach the detachable head of the shower. I lowered it and used the water to rinse his hair and then moved it around so that the jets pulsed across the muscles in his back.