All Comments on 'My Sister, My Love'

but it needs more editing....especially the verb tenses, which keep changing from the present to the past.

Nice paced story but it lacked the emotional buildup of the love. I don't have the experience of sisterly love and was not even close to my family. So, maybe I expect too much.

Nice story.....however, you never never place your penis back in the vagina once it has been in the ass. It can cause a nasty infection.

why do you new writers think you can just post anything and the readers will like it? IF you have read any stories here you would know the readers will slam you for posting a story with so many STUPID errors. delete it at once and rewrite it using a good editor and ALWAYS use a good editor BEFORE posting anything else. there were way to many wrong words, missing words, words with missing letters and misspelled words you should be ashamed to put your name on this.

Never mind the anonymous cowards just keep on writing. If they had any guts they'd leave a contact name. You do have the right to make people sign in to be able to comment, that would be only fair. Worrying about grammar on a porn site is just stupid, at least 8 people have made this a favorite story, that should give you a boost right there. Consider what I said, you have rights too.

A good read. You did well.

I found some of the phrasing a little awkward.

There are quite a few people in the same boat. Not having to play games make such relationships beneficial to many older siblings. Good job may encourage others who have desire but need some encouragement.

Despite what the anonymous poster said about you needing a good editor, and up to a point he was right, I thought this was an extremely creditable first time submission.

Certainly much of the dialogue was awkward and stilted, but on the whole the story flowed well - much better than some submissions which receive excessive praise simply because they are start to finish wanking material, with no real story line.

Unfortunately many visitors to this site read with their cocks, and provided there is plenty of graphically detailed sucking and fucking, they are more than happy to overlook the fact that what they are reading is implausible crap.

To me the merit in a story is simple - would it stand on its own as a story without the explicit sex and/or dialogue? Brush up on the minor grammatical and spelling errors, and my answer to this question would be a resounding yes.

It would be a story about a brother and sister simply enjoying long overdue time together, and rediscovering the close friendship which had in a way lapsed due to living separate lives for so many years.

I suggest that when composing dialogue, read it twice, then ask yourself "Would I feel comfortable using these exact words in exactly the same way, or would I feel awkward?"

Good luck on your next submission.

I liked the story and the situation allowing them time together. But I found the story to be choppy. There are holes in the story you should fill in. For instance, he is fondling her breasts then the next line he has them out and is kissing them. Tell us about taking off her clothes. Complete the picture.

Keep writing and tell us the picture you see in your head. Just don't go overboard with the detail.

It could have been an outstanding story, but I had a hard time reading it. The premise was fine...the execution sucked!

Nice, believable, romantic and hot. About he anal rather than going back it her pussy. should have described lubing the hole and shooting his full load in her hungry ass.

Keep writing.

Total fucking rubbish by a total wanker ass bandit

Thanks for the story.

I loved it. Very endearing. I can ignore the grammar errors for such a gentle love story.

Well thought out. Would be even better with more descriptive word choices. Read some of the other higher rated stories looking at word choices. This is a romantic love story as much as a sex story. Spice it up!

DIALOGUE NEEDS SOME WORK, BUT IT WAS OKAY OVERALL...FOUR STARS!

Good Tail!

Cinco Estrellas!