All Comments on 'My Sister, My Slut Ch. 03'

What can I say? Your story about a incestful relationship with a beautiful sister had me mesmerized. Your writing style was the best I've seen and one I only hope you will continue using. Wow, you could even continue with your story about this brother and sister.

Waiting for Chapter 4-5-6. Thanks

Hopefully new chapters soon?

This was a beautifully written story. It really kept my interest. I love your writing style. Please keep the story going. And as for Cupcake_Kandi I'm an American and every brother I know with a sister refers to them as "sis". I don't know where you're from but maybe the people you're around are just mean to their sisters.

I'm actually amazed at this story, I wasn't expecting much from it or from any story here, but your style of writing had me entranced right from the beginning. The words you use, simple yet complicated enough, makes it seem easy and fresh. If I recall, Alex said something about the brain being sexy, and yes indeed he sounds like a hot guy, not in physical way, but in one that makes you attracted by the way he speaks, thinks and feels. I love how detailed you are and how sometimes you get lost in your comparisons yet somehow make it work correctly. I think it was done beautifully, I could feel their passion and need though not much was shown. I'd love to read more about their journey in a new city with different obstacles to their relationship, I made an account just so I could comment this and give it five stars, it deserves it. I hope you keep up the good work and I will gladly read it all if you decide to continue it.

I enjoyed this story, it was nicely paced and very few errors (if any). However, the style, although your very own was a little jarring at times, at least to me. I'm British and you're obviously British from some of the terms and spelling you used but you tried to keep the setting generic, even Americanised. You used the phrase "interstate" liberally when mentioning their University placement which is strange because in the UK we don't have "states" but we have "universities" and in the US they have "States" but refer to universities as "college". I think you should have picked a location and stuck with it, bending the wording to suit as it disrupted the story trying to figure out where the story was taking place.

Finally, although I adore your use of the vernacular and expanding my vocabulary I thought a lot of the "flowery" words could have been substituted for ones in more common usage. Terms that aren't immediately recognisable often disrupt the flow of your story and when your building tension or portraying emotion the tone of the words can either help or hinder.

I did enjoy your 3 acts though, well done. ;)

Your pretentious use of an overactive vocabulary is only exceeded by desperate cry for attention.