All Comments on 'Natalia and Her Wolf Ch. 02'

how did the attackers get onto the pack land without anyone knowing unless all of the betas are in on the plot

This is altogether a story not thought through! How could Eric and the others not question Vanessa, who quite openly declared to want the Alpha? Natalia seems to be quite unbalanced and the rough taking of her doesn´t do a thing for me. Bad story, not worth my time.

Attackers getting into the alphas house so easily? Where was the security the betas etc? The alpha not waking up when intruders burst into his bedroom while he is asleep with his mate some how I don't think so. Sorry to say there are a few holes in this. I had to re read a few paragraphs to make sure I hadn't missed some thing. I hope the next chapter explains what on earth is supposed to be going on.

I'm sorry But I like other one better. This one is good. But I like your first one. But I'm willing to see how this one go. I just want her and Eric together. Lol But can't wait for your next update. But why didn't Eric wake up?

this is a good story and i really like it but there are too much things in this chapter that does not really make sense so i hope it will all be revealed in the next chapter.....and i hope the author does not get discouraged again because with all the mistakes there are still people who are really into this story

I loved this chapter. I think you didn't tell us how they got in because you want is to anticipate next chapter. We'll find out why this happened and

Eric's point of view later.

I feel sorry for all that Natalia has gone through but she need to stop blaming Eric for everything, it's getting annoying. Does this voice she periodically hears belongs to her wolf possibly?

I purposely left out that information because its a plot set up in the next chapter... It's like a plot twist.. You'll know why and how next chapter and everything will be explained. Promise.

Love your story.....I think eric is a lil bit of a jerk. He should let her be around her old friends ...they know she left with them and Sam will notice when she doesn't come back. I would be a brat to if a guy just changed my whole world and thought all I need was him to make my life whole (just my two cents....don't change a thing about ur story...can't wait to see where it goes)

Patiently ( not really ) waiting for chapters 3 and 4 to be accepted... They're taking forever 😒

Just finding this now. Looking through all of what you have written, your writing is definitely getting stronger and more mature. If I had to pick a primary weakness it is maturity. I get that Natalia is young and has had a spectacularly horrible upbringing (excepting dad). However, her loose cannon emotions and reactions make it difficult to be supportive of her. I don't want her to lose the anger, hurt and fight...just want to see her channeling it better. More quiet intensity and less drama queen.

Vanessa is wonderfully psychotically evil. Eric seems befuddled. He needs to nut up and step up to help Nat deal. He seems to slingshot between all over her hormonal and tail between his legs backing off. Alpha needs to be steady, supportive and guiding.

I am enjoying the story. Hope my nit picking helps and doesn't discourage. I enjoy seeing new authors grow. :) I'll be waiting for more. :)

its actually a pretty decent story. A lot of typos but I don't mind. U need to work on your flow. Also the sex happened too fast, try reading some of then,more popular stories to learn about writing sex. However good jib and keep going. Don't rush.

You are leading us around by the nose throughout the entire thing. You don't allow the reader to create the image of anything in their own mind. Basically you're teaching a grown adult how to walk... that's the best I can do to explain it. The idea for the plot, great... the execution... GET AN EDITOR, and maybe a few beta readers.

Stop leading everyone, each and every detail does not need to be written out in clearly defined detail for a 6 year old. Don't hold our hands the whole time, create a path and allow us to walk it ourselves.

create some build up... you have everything else, too much of it as a matter of fact.

I get it that Natalia is an exceptionally immature 18 yo, but a girl like that needs a man with strength. Eric is a serious wimp; he clearly can't protect her, support her or guide her. I don't find him believable as an alpha of anything, which funnily enough makes me intrigued about the story direction. :). The comments above are not intended as criticism, just an observation. Keep writing your own story - It rocks!

Was really enjoying the original story and to read this? A real shame because it is nowhere as good