by Looney
A great read - very hot and very inventive. Loved the adventures and the wife's involvement at the end.
the base line was good but the story needed more. the constant swithching of view points was rather anoying it felt like you were reading the story twice at times.
Needs work, really.
tho my writeing skills arnt the best my reading skills are good and my verbal to. but this was just amaseing, one of the best stories i have read in 10 years off reading erotic storeis. i just loved it, keep up the good work and thanks for giveing me and the others stories like this.
Just don't switch the perspectives, I get it, it's stylistic but damn annoying...