All Comments on 'Nicoletter Ch. 02'

Your writing is extremely choppy and doesn't flow very well. Your sentences are so stinted that I am only reading, not visualizing properly and getting lost in the words. For example, " I can smell something good coming from the kitchen. I went in there..." This could be: The delectable aromas of breakfast enticed me as I entered the kitchen...

Your writing is basically, "It smelled good. I went in there." Not very creative and not good flow for a reader. You have a high score, so your story must be interesting, just work on vamping up your writing technique.

I appreciate your comments.