Of All People

I looked around and suddenly couldn't stand the idea of being in that apartment. I grabbed my car keys and hit the road. I didn't have a destination in mind and probably wouldn't even stop except to eat and get gas.

I just drove, changing highways as the mood struck me and primarily to avoid traffic as best I could. After about 5 hours I finally settled down and was ready to head back home. I punched up my address on the GPS and I could be home in about 3 hours. I took a deep breath and started home.

No prizes for guessing which traitorous ex-sister was sitting on my stoop waiting for me to get home. Oh, I guess I gave it away, didn't I? I considered just pulling out again but this was my apartment and I was tired, and I needed to decide what was going to come next in my life. I'd just let her say whatever the hell she was going to say.

Hannah stood as I walked up the steps and started in as soon as I got halfway up.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you really that stupid and childish? You know, Christie and I have been feeling bad this whole time but I'm over it. Apparently you've decided to just be some sort of relationship martyr and use me as an excuse to ruin your life. Katie was perfect for you and you dump her because she likes me and wants to be friends? Well if that's what you want then that's what you'll get. From now on anytime I hear that you're seeing someone I'm going to make it a point to find them and be their friend. If you're going to ruin your life and blame me I at least want to have done what I'm being blamed for. Happy now?"

I listened to her rant and something in my mind just clicked. It was the answer I had been looking for since this entire thing started.

"You know, Hannah, I am, though not for the reason you've been shouting about. I've been trying to decide what was going to come next in my life and you just helped me decide what that will be. So thank you. Now get the hell away from my apartment and leave me alone!"

I walked past her and into my apartment, slamming the door (I hoped) in her face. For a few minutes she pounded on the door and yelled for me to tell her what the hell that meant but I ignored her and eventually she went away.

As Hannah was going on about what she was going to do, I realized that I was being held back primarily by geography. Everything here reminded me of Christie, Hannah, or my folks. And because of that they and this whole horrible situation were always on my mind. I needed a fresh start somewhere else.

My company was nationwide and they were always hiring people in my line of work so I had no doubt I could easily arrange a transfer someplace far, far away. Someplace where nothing would remind me of what had happened and I wouldn't have to worry about running into them or having them drop by the apartment. I immediately began packing, certain that things would start moving quickly.

*****

The next day I spoke to my department manager. He told me that he actually had me targeted for his job when he got promoted, which was likely to happen in a few months when his boss finally retired. With that as a background, he told me that there was a department manager opening and it was halfway across the country.

After a phone interview later that day and with a strong recommendation from my boss, I was offered the job and expected to report as soon as possible. The position had been vacant for some time and the piles of work were already imposing.

By the following weekend I had shipped my belongings to my new office, where they would hold them until I got settled, and I had made the move. I considered cutting ties entirely by getting a new cell phone number but decided that I should maintain some level of contact. I even emailed my new address to my parents but told them if it was ever given to Hannah or Christie I would move again and that time they wouldn't get the new one.

Of course they were upset that I had gone and begged me to come back. I told them even if I wanted to it wasn't possible because I was committed to my new position, and besides I didn't want to.

The work, I'm pleased to say, was way behind schedule, and I'm pleased to say that because it allowed me to work an ungodly number of hours and keep from thinking about all the things that had gone wrong in my life. After about 3 weeks at 80 hours a week I was pretty well caught up and could relax.

I liked the city I was in well enough and tried a couple of bars and clubs until I found one nearby that I liked. It was a small club that had a small stage with a small dance floor. It was very cozy and had live music most nights; usually someone with an acoustic guitar or perhaps a small keyboard.

I hooked up with a few women here, more for an evening's conversation that anything else. Sometimes we danced and twice it was made clear they were mine for the taking that night, but I felt no spark and declined both times.

The problem was, I realized, that I was still hung up on Katie. I was madly in love with her and had been planning my proposal when the shit hit the fan, and now I was wondering if I hadn't overreacted. Would it really have been a big deal if they were friends as long as I was kept out of it? I didn't know. What I did know was that I was lonely and I missed the woman I loved.

*****

It had been nearly two months since I had left town. I had made a few friends and went out on occasion. We were trying to set up a weekly poker night and were working on the details. Tonight I was home and just cooking a couple of burgers on my George Foreman Grill for dinner when there was a knock on the door.

Like I said, I had a few friends but none of them would just drop in; at the very least they would call first. So I assumed it was a salesman or religious missionary and almost ignored it. But I got so few visitors and thought maybe it was a neighbor that needed something, so I opened the door.

Katie.

I was completely and utterly speechless. I hadn't forbidden my parents to give her the address so I assume that's how she got it, but she had still shown up on my doorstep 1500 miles away and I couldn't think of one thing to say. She finally broke the silence.

"Can I come in, Henry? It's a little chilly out here."

That snapped me out of my trance-like state.

"Yes, of course, I'm sorry. Come in."

I moved aside and she came in, pulling off some pink knit gloves (she loves pink) as she did so and rubbing her hands together for warmth. I offered her some coffee or hot chocolate (she took the coffee) and I busied myself making it while I gathered my senses.

"You have a nice little place here. It's bigger than your old place, I think, but not too big."

I just kept focused on the coffee. She was just trying to break the silence but I was trying to get myself together emotionally. Finally the coffee was ready and I walked back to the living room with two mugs full, handing her the one with all the damn creamer in it.

"Thanks, Henry."

"What are you doing here, Katie?"

"Trying to correct the biggest mistake I've ever made."

"And what would that be?"

"Letting you break up with me. Henry, I'm so sorry about what happened. I reacted poorly and instead of hearing what you had to say I got defensive. We never talked about my parents much but dad was very controlling. The woman was there to do what the man wanted and that was about it. He cut mom off from her friends and then her family, and when you said I couldn't be friends with Hannah it seemed like you were trying to be controlling just like him, and I dug in my heels and wouldn't be bossed around."

"What changed your mind?"

"I spent a lot of time thinking about it, and the truth is I talked with Hannah and Christie about it. Now don't be upset about that. Let me explain. At first we were all pissed at what you did but after we thought about it we understood. It was actually Hannah that said I would be crazy to let you go and if that meant we couldn't be friends, well, that was a small price to pay."

"Hannah said that?" For some reason that really surprised me.

"More than once."

"So you're here hoping we can be together again?"

"Yes, baby, that's exactly why I'm here."

"Well, not only can I not go back but I wouldn't even if I could. Not only am I committed to my job out here but I love it. I've made some really good friends and I have no intention of moving back home."

"I don't expect you to. I'm ready to move here if you'll have me."

"What about your job? You love working there."

"I love you more, and one of the reasons it took me a few weeks to get out here was that I was working on a transfer to one of our sister hospitals out here. I can start as soon as I say the word."

"And if I say no?"

"I can still take it or I can go back home, but I'm hoping you won't do that. What I should have done was respect the boundary you made. I don't happen to agree with it, but I should have accepted that it was your choice."

If you think I was struggling with this you're wrong. I loved her as much as I ever did and had even considered contacting her about possibly moving here to be with me but hadn't taken that step yet. This was the fulfillment of all the dreams I had been having, but I was also wary of being hurt again so I was being cautious.

"Have you found a place to live yet?"

Her face drooped when I said that and I waited for her response.

"I hoped...that is...well, I kind of thought I might move in...with you."

I had some trouble preventing myself from smiling and cheering when she said that but I pulled it off. I wanted to yank her chain one more time for having taken Hannah's side.

"I don't think that's a good idea, Katie."

"Oh, I see. Well, would you at least be okay with us dating and seeing if we can start over, or should I just cancel the transfer?"

"I actually hadn't finished my thought. What I was going to say was that I don't think that's a good idea...unless you agree to marry me."

It took a moment for what I said to register but her face positively glowed when she finally realized that I had basically just proposed to her. She had already given herself away but tried to get herself calmed down, and finally managed to respond.

"Well, I don't know. Where's the ring?"

"In my sock drawer."

"Let's go check it out first."

I went along with this, knowing Katie wasn't into material things and wondering exactly where this was going. I found out as soon as we hit the bedroom. She was following behind me and no sooner had we walked through the door than she pushed me on to the bed and began stripping my clothes off. I began to say something about us not being near the sock drawer but she cut me off.

"Shut up and fuck me, Henry. Then we'll put the damn ring on my finger."

We were both so frantic that we were having trouble getting our clothes off. Finally she got my jeans undone and hers pulled off, her bra pulled down and around her waist because neither of us seemed to be able to focus enough to get the hooks undone.

She took me straight inside of her, wasting no time with foreplay of any kind. Not that we needed it: I was as hard as a rock and she was practically dripping. It was an energetic fuck, our bodies slamming together over and over. I hadn't been laid since I had last been with Katie over 2 months ago and I was certain I wouldn't last long. I'm guessing it had been as long for her because she let loose a huge orgasm just seconds before I shot my load into her.

Katie collapsed on to my chest and we just lay there for a few minutes gathering our thoughts and getting our breath back. Finally, she sat up, brushing several strands of her blonde hair from in front of her face, and with my partially hard shaft still inside of her.

"I believe you said something about a ring."

*****

We were married just a month later. Mom and dad were invited, and Katie's family came out from Illinois as well. Hannah and Christie were not invited and I did not see them, though I had this odd feeling they were there somewhere.

The next 5 years passed smoothly. Katie and I had three girls: Darcy is 4 and the twins, Victoria and Veronica, just turned 2. Katie was mostly a full-time mom but did work some relief shifts at the hospital a few times a month. She made some friends there and likes to keep in touch, not to mention that she loves being a nurse.

I came home from work one night to find Katie working on dinner and speaking in hushed tones on the phone. Without an explanation she asked me to take over dinner, which I of course did, and she disappeared into the bedroom. Once everything was ready I knocked on the door and let her know dinner is ready, and moments later she walked out of the bedroom.

"Who was...?"

"After dinner, baby."

I tried to act normal during dinner but found myself thinking about what was going on. Katie is not a secretive person so the fact that she was speaking with someone and not letting me know who as well as putting off talking about it until later had my radar going off.

We got the kids into bed and finally got a chance to talk about what was going on. We went into the living room and she brought each of us some tea. No caffeine, I thought; this isn't going to be good.

"Baby, that was Hannah on the phone."

"Hannah? God dammit, Katie, have I not been clear about this?"

"Honey, calm down. I need you to trust me, okay. Do you trust me?"

I did my best to calm down. Of course I trusted her, with my life and the three little girls that were the most precious things in the world. But she seemed to have a soft spot when it came to Hannah.

"Yes, I trust you."

"Then let me explain. You know that I think you should put this anger behind you. You getting so angry makes me feel like you still wish you were married to Christie and that I'm just a consolation prize."

"Katie, baby, you know this isn't even about Christie. I love you more than I ever loved her, and I'll even admit that things seemed to have worked out for everyone. But that doesn't change what my own sister, my own twin-God-damned-sister did to me. That's what I've always been really pissed about."

"I know that, I do. But I'm telling you how I feel, okay? This is actually the first time I've spoken to Hannah since I moved out here. I've spoken to your parents a few times, but I thought it was important for her to have my number in case of an emergency."

That got my attention and I was suddenly on edge.

"Why? What's happened?"

Katie took my hand and looked me in the eyes. The sorrow was evident and it was clearly very bad news.

"Baby, your dad had a heart attack last night. I'm sorry but he didn't make it."

Words failed me. My dad had died? He wasn't even 70 years old and was in great health. I couldn't believe it. And here I was 1500 miles away and stewing about something that happened 5 years ago when I should have been there. Damn it, I should have been there.

"I need to call mom."

The call was brief. She was inconsolable and couldn't really get any words out, so Christie took over the call briefly while we said goodbye and I let her know Katie would be in touch. Hannah had passed the funeral information on to Katie earlier so we started making arrangements. I called into work to let them know I'd be taking some time off and Katie let the hospital know she wouldn't be available for a while. We booked flights for the next day and started packing.

I hadn't been home in the 5+ years since I had left suddenly to get away from it all, and I wasn't looking forward to this visit. But this was my mom and I needed to be with her, even if that meant facing Hannah and Christie in order to do it.

*****

The flight was uneventful and we landed smoothly and on time. We picked up the rental car Katie had reserved, and I suggested we just make a quick stop at the hotel to check in drop off our things.

"We're not staying at a hotel, honey. We're staying with your mom."

Katie said that very firmly, almost daring me to challenge her on it. I, wisely I think, said nothing. We rode in silence for about 10 more minutes before she spoke again.

"We're staying in your old room and Hannah's old room has been set up for the girls. You need to be there for your mom and it's not up for discussion. Yes, you're going to have to see Hannah and Christie and no, you're not going to have a hotel room to escape to. This is about being there for your mother and you're going to be a grown up about it. Hannah and Christie have already promised not to bring up the past or try to get you to talk about it. It's about being there for your mom and they promised to respect that and I expect you to do the same. Is that clear?"

Mostly I understood that she was right, that this is what families do at the time of tragedy and, like it or not, Hannah and Christie were still technically family. Part of me was angry and felt like I had been set up just a little bit, but if they would be civil and not mention the past then I could do the same. So all I said was:

"Yes, dear."

The truth was that my anger was getting harder and harder to maintain, mostly because of the time that had elapsed but also because things ultimately turned out so well, and because by moving away I had put some distance between me and the associated feelings of being near them.

We pulled into the driveway and I prepared myself to face Hannah and Christie. Mom and dad had made trips out to our place a few times since I moved so they had both had the opportunity to meet their grandchildren. I was happy they had been able to do that before he passed. But neither Hannah nor Christie had ever met their nieces, though I was sure mom and dad had shared pictures of them.

Darcy was walking by herself and we each carried one of the twins. I had Veronica and Katie had Victoria. I must have seemed tense.

"Relax baby. Hannah and Christie aren't here right now. They're coming over later for dinner."

I wasn't honestly sure how I was going to feel when I finally saw them in person for the first time in over 5 years. I wasn't even upset with Christie anymore. I mean, okay, she cheated on me. She started dating Hannah while we were married and didn't say anything until they were sure, which made me something of a backup plan. But when the time came she came to me and told me the truth and we went our separate ways. I wasn't forced to discover what was happening. It wasn't perfect but it was acceptable.

Hannah's betrayal was worse. I felt like she owed me more consideration. I did want her to be happy, but at the same time she shouldn't have been willing to sacrifice my happiness for her own. She couldn't have known how things would end up. She had no idea I would find Katie after Christie left me. To me, that meant she should have walked away.

We went into the house and mom was sitting in the front room. Darcy yelled 'grandma' and ran to her. Mom's tears started immediately, like she had just been somehow managing to hold them back before we got here.

We let Darcy and the twins love on their grandma for a few minutes, and then Katie took them upstairs to get settled. I tried to go along but Katie said I needed to visit with mom.

"How are you holding up, mom?"

"As well as can be expected, Henry. The flight was okay, I hope."

"No problems. Can I get you anything?"

She declined and we spent the next several minutes chatting before the girls came downstairs. Mom somehow slipped right into Grandma Mode and soon a batch of chocolate chip cookies was baking in the oven.

A couple of hours before dinner we laid the girls down for a nap and Katie and I went into our room to rest. I started to get a little frisky, as I often do when relaxing with my beautiful wife, and started kissing her neck. She moaned a bit a moved her neck to make it easier. I eased my hand inside her shirt and was fondling her breasts first through, and then under, her bra. Katie has small breasts so rarely wears a bra except for at work or with certain outfits, though she wore one today because we were traveling. However, her bras aren't very strong - they're more for coverage then support - and it provided virtually no resistance.